475 lbs and terrified

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  • ruthejp13
    ruthejp13 Posts: 213 Member
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    It's not your fault but you have the power to change.
    http://youtu.be/Ah6jZsEZGs4

    Big Food and Big Government has altered the environment and our bodies. By being told to eat carbs as the foundation of society's diet has led to our bodies telling us that we are starving even while we are stuffing ourselves. Eat whole foods and limit carbs except veggies until you start to see progress.

    Also check out Dr. Lustig's Sugar the Bitter Truth.
    http://youtu.be/dBnniua6-oM
  • RWTBR
    RWTBR Posts: 140 Member
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    Feel free to add me. Also, one thing I think you might benefit from is reading the book "The Beck Diet Solution." It helps people address the psychological issues behind weight loss.
  • simplydelish2
    simplydelish2 Posts: 726 Member
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    You can do this. Yes, it's going to be a bit of a roller-coaster - but those are fun right?

    My two cents: Make this a lifestyle change. Eat the foods you like in moderation and gradually move to a more balanced and healthy diet. I like lots of food...so I eat huge salads, tons of veggies, very lean meat (generally turkey and chicken), I have fruit once in awhile and greek yogurt for dessert...and I drink tons of water. I've lost over 100 lbs and have that much more to go.

    Next, learn to love yourself...you may not like your body right now but you can change that...love you. Louise Hay says she stands in front of the mirror each morning and tells herself how much she loves her. You have to love yourself first.

    Learn to dismiss the haters...if it was simple to be of an ideal weight and super healthy - we'd all be there. We aren't. So only bring those people into your life that support you.

    You can do this!
  • dherburg
    dherburg Posts: 12 Member
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    Reading the Craigslist post made me want to cry, not only for how mean some people can be, but for how it sounds too much like what I have said to myself about myself in my own head so many times. Such great advice here from caring people, all I would add is to treat yourself the way you would treat a dear friend--I still fall down and stumble and I have to remind myself what I would say to a friend who was struggling, and that is what I deserve to say to myself as well. Then I go on MFP and read inspiring stories from others to keep me going. One step, one ounce, one inch at a time. Welcome to the start of your healthy life journey and all the folks who are here to support you!
  • geebusuk
    geebusuk Posts: 3,348 Member
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    Also check out Dr. Lustig's Sugar the Bitter Truth.
    http://youtu.be/dBnniua6-oM
    Blaming other people for our own problems is an excellent way to NOT address them.

    It does do rather well in putting money in a certain Mr Lustig's pockets, however.

    And no, if you actuall READ lustig's stuff, you'll see that he still does admit it's the calorie surplus that's the issue.
    It REALLY doesn't matter if that calorie surplus comes from evil-corporation-gubbermint-carbs, or from hippy-friendly-vegan-organic-bs-not-carbs. ;)
  • badbcatha05
    badbcatha05 Posts: 200 Member
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    I can't offer you a true been there done that kind of support or advice but I can applaud you for coming here and being ready to make a change.

    Don't worry about being perfect and all the nitty gritty details of eating only so many carbs or so much fat... especially in the beginning. Figure out what your caloric burn is now, and eat 500 or so below that. Please don't get sucked in to only eating 1200 calories a day especially at 475lbs. I think the best thing would be to start out making small changes... they are much easier to stick with, and when there are slip ups (I'd hazard a guess that we have likely ALL had them for one reason or another) it won't seem catastrophic. Just put that day in the past, and start new in the morning.

    When you get to the point where you can start working out regularly, I think you will find it helps your depression also. I have found it amazing at improving and stabilizing my moods.

    Best of luck to you. I hope you are able to find a group of friends on here, if not in real life, who can offer you support and encouragement on this journey!! :flowerforyou:
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    You soooo got this! It seems difficult at first, but as soon it becomes a way of life, it is the most simple thing in the world! Such great advice here. I am sure someone said this already but I just want to say again to not worry about carbs, fat, sugar...especially at first. Do not deprive yourself of the foods you enjoy. Just stay within your daily calories, it is that simple. If you do this, the weight will come off...it will go up a little at times but DO NOT give up. Best of luck to you and feel free to add me if you would like!
  • motivatedmartha
    motivatedmartha Posts: 1,108 Member
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    Just to add to all the great advice from some really good people.

    No-one here will judge you because of the size you are now - we are all here because we have not eaten sensibly in the past - even those trying to gain weight. We all want to support each other in the process of improving our health or be supported. So forget the prat who made such unkind comments - anonymously (says it all) - the only time you will get any negativity here is if you post about dangerous/silly or downright daft 'quick fixes' - such comments are from people who have worked hard to achieve what they have and know from experience that drastic 'diets, pills and quick fix potions' do not work. They want you to succeed too and will help if asked.

    Create a good friend list - find the people that will give you the type of support you need - for some that is a kick up the bottom or a sharp reminder that we got it wrong - for others it means gently encouragement of what we got right and a forgiving smile when we got it wrong.

    Use the Search facility to look up the answers to your questions - there is lots of info - good mfp friends will help you find it quickly.

    Good Luck on your journey - learn to love eating carefully planned and prepared food - eating mindlessly because it's ther and you're feeling bad is not fun.

    :smile:
  • jumbojoynomore
    jumbojoynomore Posts: 13 Member
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    Just like the alcohol anonymous model -- "One day at a time." If we look at it otherwise, none of us will ever get there. There are days that 70 lbs seems like an unattainable goal, but I have to keep telling myself just look at what you're doing today. Am I eating healthy? Am I moving around? Don't look at the end result, look toward your small successes. Small successes build into larger ones. You can do it by taking it day by day!
  • ednaemerson
    ednaemerson Posts: 63 Member
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    Very good advice. I myself always get hung up on carbs and I am trying to re-educate my thinking. Many thanks for the post.
  • ImeldaMGF
    ImeldaMGF Posts: 13
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    There can be a place for tough love and stern talking to but anonymously on the internet isn't it.

    If I were you I wouldn't be thinking about the big number, break it down into less scary chunks, where do you want to be in a months time ( being realistic) ?

    I'd like to add you as a diet buddy if that's ok? You sound very strong.
  • laratacita
    laratacita Posts: 53 Member
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    You've made the decision to get started. Now, as someone else mentioned, don't beat yourself up if you go over calories on a day or two or slip up and go back into old habits. Plenty of people use food as a form of self-medication.

    But there are groups on this site for those in your situation, and there are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and the odd asexual user here. Look for those groups for additional challenges.

    Now, I don't know your plans or even if it's relevant, but remember that even though a lot of them are jerks, some guys at the gym are cute.
  • ehodgdend4
    ehodgdend4 Posts: 27 Member
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    You can do this. Yes, it's going to be a bit of a roller-coaster - but those are fun right?

    My two cents: Make this a lifestyle change. Eat the foods you like in moderation and gradually move to a more balanced and healthy diet. I like lots of food...so I eat huge salads, tons of veggies, very lean meat (generally turkey and chicken), I have fruit once in awhile and greek yogurt for dessert...and I drink tons of water. I've lost over 100 lbs and have that much more to go.

    Next, learn to love yourself...you may not like your body right now but you can change that...love you. Louise Hay says she stands in front of the mirror each morning and tells herself how much she loves her. You have to love yourself first.

    Learn to dismiss the haters...if it was simple to be of an ideal weight and super healthy - we'd all be there. We aren't. So only bring those people into your life that support you.

    You can do this!

    This man has nailed on the head. I know the feeling i was at 485lb last july, and i didnt care about really anything, i ate garbage foods i would drink my calories for a week in 1 day, slept like crap, didnt really do any physical activites except move from computer chair to my room or my car or to the fridge. Finally at my low point i lost my job, lost my gf and a friend. It was then that i decided i needed to do something. to make a long story short i started eating healthy, i did more exercise start slow at first then worked up to more and more, This may i was weighted at the doctors office i was 384, so losing alot of weight can be done its slow at first but doable. Theirs alot and i do ALOT of people who are giving you great advice.

    But remember this, You are not alone, if you think you are the only one who has weight issues and depression and all that your are not. surround yourself with people who are wiling to push you up the stairs to your goals and have a few that will push you down the stairs but will pick you back up and push your *kitten* back up them

    So feel free to add me
  • deetee6718
    deetee6718 Posts: 70 Member
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    Don't want to sound hokey but .........Making a big life change is scary but you know what's even scarier? Regret! You have taken a huge step already, don't look back only move forward. It doesn't matter how long it takes you can do this and MFP is a great support network!
  • Sharon_C
    Sharon_C Posts: 2,132 Member
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    You know what really helped me this time around and is the reason I think I've kept the weight off for so long (besides this awesome MFP community)? Allowing myself to fail. If you allow yourself to fail you won't beat yourself up so much. It's okay to be imperfect. We're all imperfect. What sets us above everyone else is the ability to get back up and do it again.
  • SnuggleSmacks
    SnuggleSmacks Posts: 3,731 Member
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    You know what really helped me this time around and is the reason I think I've kept the weight off for so long (besides this awesome MFP community)? Allowing myself to fail. If you allow yourself to fail you won't beat yourself up so much. It's okay to be imperfect. We're all imperfect. What sets us above everyone else is the ability to get back up and do it again.

    It's all in your perspective. If I go over my calorie goal for the day, I haven't failed. I just delayed achieving my goal a little. And unless you have some set date to reach your goal, like a wedding or whatever, then what does it matter if I reach it a week later? I want to get there, but not badly enough to beat myself up over an extra day, week, or month. And once I do get there, I'll probably just change it anyway. So no biggie. Right?
  • IIIIISerenityNowIIIII
    IIIIISerenityNowIIIII Posts: 425 Member
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    This post really hurts to read. I'm so so sorry you feel so bad. To an extent a lot of us can relate to some of what you said. I used to think the only way to be thin was good genes, and I just didn't have that. I thought the only way to be a reasonable weight was diet scams, pills ,etc, anything other than simply figuring out what your calorie needs are and eating at a deficit. I thought I would have to starve myself to be thin but never realized there is only like a 300 calorie difference between what I used to eat and what I would eat if I were super thin. 300 calories is nothing!

    You have to come to realize that you CAN do this alone. The body is amazing and you will be amazed at your results if you just LET yourself succeed. It is probably a simpler process than you think. It was for me.

    In a few months you could be under 400 pounds. At 399 you will reach an encouraging milestone that will help push you til you hit your next milestone.

    The depression is pretty normal. That is a contributing factor. Many feel worthless so they don't feel that they deserve the care it takes to be healthy. But, you have to love yourself and that will let you realize that you are worthy of being taken care of, especially by yourself!

    You can do it if you just LET yourself be healthy. Food doesn't have to control you. You can have all the control to live an active and healthy life.
  • Misslisareformed1
    Misslisareformed1 Posts: 307 Member
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    These people on here are nothing like craiglist. We uplift and care for each other...Here is like fine wine or a five star meal...craiglist is like eating mcdonlads...its full of ****...

    Step one...log all your food
    Step two MOVE whatever it is just move
    log log log log
    move move move
    its that simple
    and i promise people on here will be encouraging. I lost twenty pounds in two months by doing just that. I received tons of motivation. I love this site because all i get is postive vibes. And if you do run across a hater...well tell em' see you at the finish line. Never give up!! you can do it
  • mareluvsfood
    mareluvsfood Posts: 3 Member
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    You can do this and you are so worth it!!
  • chole333
    chole333 Posts: 1
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    after you stop eating the sweets and you go too eat them again your gonna think there nasty what was i thinking ;) you will do fine hang in there
    :flowerforyou:

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