Fitter than your partner?
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us
And THIS. This is fcking sexy. Grrr baby, very grrr!!
WHy thank you. Credit to my mate the photographer for his handy work
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My boyfriend is very fit and has always had a crazy high metabilism. Unfortunately this is not a good thing because he has no concept of the fact that we cant all eat a whole bag of white pasta and six donuts for one meal and have a six pack.
That being said, I am much more of healthy eater...and healthier in general.
We both cycle. While I cycle once or twice a week and work 50 hours a week he works 30 hours a week and cycles 4 times a week.
Honestly, we have the same goals but different paths to get there.0 -
He has a nicer body in terms of body fat percentage and muscle tone. However, he has a naturally high metabolism and eats cookies, pancakes, candy, and an entire bag of potato chips dipped in ranch. Boo. In terms of eating healthy and working out, I think I have far surpassed him. I eat clean, for the most part and do rigorous workouts daily. He complains for two days after doing one 20 minute strength training circuit, which happens once a month maybe if I beg and plead. I have a lot more stamina, endurance and I'm working on becoming stronger than him =] Haha0
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Point: Who cares. You love him or you don't.
pretty much this. but, my SO and i are both in pretty good shape. we do different things though. he's a power lifter and a badass at it. i can't remember the last time i touched iron (though i'm not opposed to it, just not had the opportunity arise). i'm a distance runner. he runs as well, just not quite the distances i do. although i know he can do the distances if he trained for it, it's just not his primary focus. we both can kick butt in a power yoga class.
i'm pretty sure i could school him on a basketball court though
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Just wondering if most people here are at around the same level of fitness as their significant other, or whether one of you is in better shape, and/or at a healthier weight than the other.
In my case I work pretty hard to eat well and exercise and try to stay in shape. Hy husband, while I love him very much, is about 60 pounds overweight, claims he has no time to exercise, and travels for business frequently, meaning lots of restaurant meals which have done a number on his waistline. I do get frustrated by has lack of willingness to focus on his health. I know he works hard in a demanding job, but I also know other people make the time to workout and are more conscious about what they are eating. I try to be supportive, set a good example, and prepare healthy meals when he is around, drag him out for walks so he gets moving a bit more. Mostly I want to to be healthy for our children, but I will also admit that I am less attracted to him since he's put on so much weight. He was a little chubby when we met and married, but now qualifies as obese.
mixed bag it is... as long as your getting great sex srs! 0 -
I am overweight, considered obese, but I eat healthy even if too much and I work out 4 to 5 times a week on average.
My husband is the perfect weight for his height, but he is flabby, eats horribly and never works out. He needs cholesterol meds too.
Although, I am overweight, I am still in better shape overall than my husband. It is definitely not just about the pounds and the numbers on the scale, it is about how you take care of yourself.0 -
We're polar opposites here.
Husband runs miles and miles a day and then spends three hours lifting. Or he gets cranky. He doesn't really bother watching what he eats, though, so he's not crazy ripped. He's just very fit and weighs about the same that I do (albeit six inches taller, of course).
I.... don't work out at all right now, and I have never found any form of exercise to be anything other than torturous. Tomorrow's a new day to change that, but it's been a long series of tomorrows for a while now. I am pretty into the nutritional side, though (well, I obviously haven't been all of the time or I wouldn't have that ticker going down there, but I mean when I'm trying that's my thing rather than working out).
We started dating because we saw each other in the gym (back during attempt 6582 at getting "into" fitness for me) and almost broke up a few times while we were dating over my reluctance to go to the gym. Not because he was unhappy with my shape - just because he'd get all excited about going together and I'd either be a miserable cow about it or bail. QUITTING the gym dates was one of the best things we ever did for our relationship. :-P0 -
I'm definitely fitter than my husband. I have an active job (lab scientist- never sit down!), run, do workout DVDs, and play volleyball. At 6' 180 I've got a little bit to lose to get back to the 155 I was when we got married, but I'm still not overweight and I'm likely in better shape than I was back then.
Hubby is 6' about 250 lbs. He was around 180 when we started dating but I think sits best at around 200-210. It's been a long time since I've seen that though. We do walk together with the dog for about an hour a day, and he's switched from full calorie soda to coffee for his caffeine fix (he's a professor). We cook regularly but he has a small problem with portion size and drinking his calories (soda, beer, etc).
He says he's trying to lose weight for health reasons but I'm not sure that it's working
But now that it's summer we're outside a lot more. I hope by the end of the summer he's lost a bit. His bloodwork/cholesterol is fine though, so for that I'm very grateful 0 -
I'm in a similar situation. In the last year, I've been totally focused on working out and being as healthy as I can be. On the other hand, my husband has gone the opposite direction. He's now about 60 pounds overweight as well, and doesn't really care to do anything about it.
He's a stay at home dad (kids are 10 and 12), but has plenty of time to work out (if he wanted). Clearly, he has no desire to do so and it's put a huge dent in our relationship. I don't need him to be a fitness fanatic, but he is so overweight and out of shape that he can't do things with the kids and I on the week-ends.
ETA: He is 5'9" and weighs about 265.0 -
My husband used to do triathlons....used to lift weights...used to be a lifeguard...used to work on a horse farm...before we met.
I used to be in the military...before we met.
My husband is in good shape still however he doesn't exercise anymore unless it's a walk or a bike ride with me, he eats well but that's because I do the shopping and a lot of the cooking and if he cooks he is cooking for me...he likes video games...
I lift weights (my PR is his bw...his pr my bw), I do HIIT, I walk, I bike, I swim...but....I still smoke...however I don't get winded walking or biking...with him.
My BP is lower than his, he has high BP, his HR is lower than mine...
I think we pretty much break even...0 -
I'm in much better shape than my husband............he has very poor eating habits.
He's in retail and works long hours - he doesn't plan ahead and make his lunch - or go out to lunch - and he'll go for 8+ hours without eating. Then he'll get home and be famished - and eat HUGE quantities of food - fast food, greasy food - poor choices.
He also refuses to exercise - he claims 'he's on his feet all day, that's enough'.
But it's not enough - it's not cardio - and it doesn't put a dent in his poor eating habits.
He has high blood pressure - his father died of a heart attack at age 42.
I worry about his health constantly.0 -
Since making this life style change I am most definitely in better shape. He has not been supportive although he will claim otherwise. He has only commented about my change when prodded by someone else. I have not felt this good in years and I have no plan on stopping what I am doing.0
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My fiance has a very active outdoor job but he has put on about 20lb since we have been together. Partly due to overindulgence (we both love our beer and eating out!), and more recently because he has been off work with a knee injury but still kept the same eating habits and was boredom eating while stuck at home recuperating.
I have probably put on a similar amount of weight in the 4 years we have been together (not sure exactly how much because I never weighed myself, but it translates to around a dress size in my case). I've always cooked and eaten healthier than him at home, and gone to the gym and hiked for exercise as I have a desk job. He never needed to exercise formally because of his job, although he did like cycling and hopes to get back into it again when his knee is up to it.
I'm now working on losing mine, he talks a lot about losing his but so far isn't doing very much about it! I'm doing my best to lead by example and not to nag 0 -
I am much much more fit than my partner. But I always was.
I knew getting into this he's not as active as me, and probably wouldn't be anytime soon.
I love him dearly so decided it was something I would gladly accept in trade for his love.
There are times I wish he'd get with it, for his own health sake. But I've been with somebody who tried to push me into diets/workouts and shame my figure before, it's no bueno.
Anything he does will come from his own desire and I'll happily support it. But I found getting too involved just leads to frustration on my part.0 -
During my last relationship I started off being unhealthier then her and kinda switched roles about a year into the relationship. In order to make herself feel better she started giving me a hard time about going to the gym and asked for me to stop going and not to lose anymore weight. This was one of the key factors that ended our relationship.0
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I am in a pretty new relationship with a guy I've known for 14 years. I was always the heavier one, by far (100 + lbs, easy), throughout our friendship. Since making the changes I have, I am the more fit and active of the two of us. I have no idea weight-wise but I do know I can outperform him as far as swimming and biking and I actually participate in athletic events. I just realized that this is probably the first time I've been the smaller person in the relationship! This is the first time I've been able to steal my boyfriend's shirts to wear as PJs. It's kind of fun.
He has horrible eating habits due to his work and schedule. I'm actually a good influence on him health-wise. He loves me for me, and I love him for who he is too. I just want us both to live long and happy lives.0 -
We sweat together and often. When we run we suffer tegether, when we stretch we get limber together, when we play, we play hard together. I can out run, out lift, out stretch, and pin her down.... but she can out love me everytime!
That's all I could ask for. So in love.0 -
My boyfriend is quite overweight. I was in pretty good shape (about 150lbs and swimming daily) when we met each other. I gained 45 lbs in the first year we were together. I enjoyed being with him and a lot of our activities revolved around food and social events etc. I had never let myself go like that before but I cant blame him (although I would like to ha!). I started getting back into shape and about 6 months later he decided he better buck up as well. He goes to the gym 3-4 times a week now. Loves lifting, plays basketball and baseball. I make a lot of our food to keep us on track. Fast food and icecream is his weakness. He has went from 305lbs to 260lbs and is in A LOT better shape now. I still have about 20-25 lbs to lose but am also in WAY better shape. It is nice when you have a partner to keep you focused and motivate you.0
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I'd articulate it with him... and working out with your other partner can act as foreplay.
In my case I am dating a Brazilian - when I say she is fit...
she is fit...
*bites jaw and thinks of her passionately*0 -
His weight has never affected my attraction to him, and I've never said anything about his weight, except to support his desire to lose weight. Weight is such a personal issue for many people (most, I'd say) that I would never tell anyone, let alone a spouse, that they needed to lose weight. If you're fat, you already know it.
This.
You can't tell someone else what he needs to do. I'm more fit and thinner than my husband, but when I was heavy, he never said word one to me about my weight. I would have been crushed if he had...especially if he had told me (or anyone) that he was not as physically attracted to me as he once was. My MIL made a comment about my weight two and a half months ago and it devastated me. I can't imagine how I would have reacted had it been someone who means the world to me.
Your husband will realize, at some point, that he needs to do something. Until then, just keep doing for you. And be ready to support him when he decides to make a change.0 -
I am single and always been fitter than most of the women I date.0
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I am the overweight one and he is the "fit" one.0
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Physical fitness and eating well are personal choices, you can't and shouldn't attempt to force your lifestyle on your partner. If they really want those things in their life then they will make the necessary changes.
Your only job should be to love your partner as they are, not as you wish them to be.0 -
My SO and I are both classified as morbidly obese, but I'm making changes and he isn't really. He's been supportive, but I think he's been so discouraged by his health issues and failed attempts over the years he's hesitant. I'm working on him though!
He's diabetic and has severe issues with his legs so I guess I'd be more "fit" than him by default, but hopefully if I can get him to get himself on the right track he'll feel better.0 -
From a cardio point of view, I kick my hubby's butt, but he is pretty strong and spends more time lifting that I do (I'm still just getting in to weights), so from that aspect, he pips me there big time. From a healthy eating point of view, I would say my diet is much better than his. His metabolism is VERY high, so he can literally shovel all kinds of crap in his mouth and not put a pound on (grrr!). I just wish he would eat a bit more fresh food than he does (he eats a lot of processed stuff), but he is slap bang in the middle of the healthy BMI scale and has only like 10% body-fat, so doesn't feel the need to change his eating habits at the moment.0
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When I was married I was running 30-40 miles a week and very fit, my X was very unhealthy and overweight. After our divorce I gained around 15 pounds because I started working full time, and my X dropped 60 lbs started running and biking.
That would not have made a difference in our relationship, but why is it that some people drastically drop weight and decide to get fit after a breakup?0 -
When I was married I was running 30-40 miles a week and very fit, my X was very unhealthy and overweight. After our divorce I gained around 15 pounds because I started working full time, and my X dropped 60 lbs started running and biking.
That would not have made a difference in our relationship, but why is it that some people drastically drop weight and decide to get fit after a breakup?
I think its because people get comfortable in relationships so they dont mind putting on a few pounds but as soon as they are put back into the single life they feel they have to get back into shape to get the attention from the opposite sex. (Or same if that floats your boat). Speaking from a guys perspective i know lots of dudes after their breakup hit the gym hard.0 -
As your husband's wife you have a right to approach your husband about his increasing weight especially if it's starting to get to you. The only thing is you can't force him to want to lose weight, in fact you will probably make it worse if you go that route. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water but you can't force it to drink.
Continue to lead by example and incorporating healthy options as often as you can. Eventually he'll come up with it and think it was his own brilliant idea.0 -
When I met my partner I was at my heaviest weight, and so he was the fitter one. Now, we go hiking and I am the fitter one It's nice inside to feel that I have come so far and improved, but I know how it feels and would never judge him because I am more fit than he is. 0
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When we started dating I was definitely the fitter one. Now that my partner is doing military training, he's definitely in better shape than I am now. But knowing that motivates me to get up every day and kick my workout's butt so I can keep up with him. We like to go hiking and do fitness things together so I need to stay fit.0
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