Should I be offended? (Pt 2)

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Replies

  • Lauren8239
    Lauren8239 Posts: 1,039 Member
    Can you belch like a pro and part his hair next time he comes in your office?
  • jlshea
    jlshea Posts: 494 Member
    So glad I work from home. Not only because I'm laughing like a hyena at this but also so no one can come in and crop dust my office except for my dog.
  • disneygallagirl
    disneygallagirl Posts: 515 Member
    seriously ROFL....tears from laughing so hard.
    He is just wierd....I don't think you could even make that up!

    Maybe you should post a "no fart zone" poster by your office.
    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[/img]
  • LosingExtraKristy
    LosingExtraKristy Posts: 164 Member
    Love this!! I had someone stand next to my cube, talking to the person next to me, and he farted...it was nasty. I get that we all do it...but jeez people!! Thank you for the much needed chuckle!
  • rachelrb85
    rachelrb85 Posts: 579 Member
    Can you belch like a pro and part his hair next time he comes in your office?

    Now this is solid advice
  • RBXChas
    RBXChas Posts: 2,708 Member
    OMG.

    That is beyond weird.

    I have a feeling this guy is going to dig his own grave, sooner or later. People like that typically do.

    But I am also really glad that you were so assertive and direct, that's gonna set you up for a much easier time in your career IMO. Well done!!

    I'm with seltzermint on this one.

    I think he's just a strange creature, and you're obviously not the only one who thinks so!
  • RBXChas
    RBXChas Posts: 2,708 Member
    i was working with a lady in the office. as i sat at her desk she stood behind me. she is known for making oddball noises to pass the time.

    as i am sitting there she farted. shes mid 60s and didnt say a word.

    i went back and told my boss and i told a few others what she did.

    i think its best to not call anyone out on such things as all it will do is lead to embarrassment. they know they farted, you know they farted does anything really have to be said.

    would you have been happier with him patting his stomach and saying, sweet baby jesus come smell this as he puts you in a headlock and makes you smell it?

    It is common knowlege that if you fart in front of another human being, you apologize. Best case scenario, you both laugh awkwardly and move on. You do not stare at them and then give them a donut..

    I guess there is such a thing as fart etiquette :D
  • paulawatkins1974
    paulawatkins1974 Posts: 720 Member
    I am dying here! You're right you may have met the weirdest person on the planet LOL. I have a coworker that everytime she takes a day off due to diarrhea (which is often) she tells everyone. I thought SHE was the weirdest. (to me that stuff is personal just say you're not feeling well) Jeff has her beat!
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    your other co-worker was correct with the "weird as f***" comment

    oh my days that whole post made me laugh so much!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


    as for advice... err, sorry don't have any. Other than keep a container of air freshener handy.
  • yvie63
    yvie63 Posts: 193 Member
    Thank you so much for writing this post, I've had a really crappy day and was so miserable, then I read this and am PMSL. That is the funniest conversation ever!
  • jigsawxyouth
    jigsawxyouth Posts: 308 Member
    there would have been no way I could have heard someone fart and not giggle...
    I've been in yoga classes and would hear someone fart, and I would lose it...
    HOW COULD YOU KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE?!?!
  • healthyplans
    healthyplans Posts: 134 Member
    Well I was needing a laugh... So thank you. I didn't catch part one and may save it til I need another laugh.
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    part 1 and 2. this made my day.

    I was having a sad day... I am not anymore.

    too funny!!!!!
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    This sort of reminds me of when I took my learning to ride motorcycle class. There was this guy and he kept burping. All kinds of burps, sometimes it sounded like something was going to come up. We had to do some classroom work in small groups, and it was like constant. It was disgusting. Then on another day when some of us were talking outside, this woman was talking about how uncomfortable it is to ride when it is really hot out, and Mr. Burp told her that is because she has "swamp *kitten*".

    Oh, and he looked like this:

    Tim-Robbins-Photos5.jpg
  • sarainiowa
    sarainiowa Posts: 287 Member
    Thanks for the update. I finally laughed today!
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    This made me laugh, because when I go out with my grandma (she is 86), she farts constantly! She never says anything about it just keeps talking or walking. It doesn't matter where we are or who is around, she just lets em rip! So funny really.
  • paulawatkins1974
    paulawatkins1974 Posts: 720 Member
    Thank you so much for writing this post, I've had a really crappy day and was so miserable, then I read this and am PMSL. That is the funniest conversation ever!
    OP had a "crappier" day HAHAHA
  • Pipsg1rl
    Pipsg1rl Posts: 1,414 Member
    I am dying here! You're right you may have met the weirdest person on the planet LOL. I have a coworker that everytime she takes a day off due to diarrhea (which is often) she tells everyone. I thought SHE was the weirdest. (to me that stuff is personal just say you're not feeling well) Jeff has her beat!

    Man, why wouldn't she just say "medical condition" or even "IBS flare up." I mean, we all know that's what happens with IBS but you don't want to really think about it.
  • DavidSTC
    DavidSTC Posts: 173 Member
    Wow.

    The fart and stare-down episode was epic.

    But, the "you don't police my farts" comment, gift donut and attempted hug take this story to new heights.

    It's an SNL skit, except much funnier.

    I am definitely going to tell my family about this. From now on, when one slips, I'll remind them how they don't police my farts, and I'll offer them a donut, and then a hug.

    On a serious note, I really would write down what happened and date it, just so you have it in your records, even if you don't go to H.R. Because if Methane Pants Jeff actually does mess with you again, you should have that ready for H.R. He's obviously going to lie about what happened. "Fire, fire, pants on fire ... "
  • Jonesingmucho
    Jonesingmucho Posts: 4,902 Member
    I can't read anymore...
    The tears from laughter have blinded me...
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    :laugh:
  • kinkyslinky16
    kinkyslinky16 Posts: 1,469 Member
    I can't stop laughing for the 2nd day in a row. You are SO awesome! :flowerforyou: :laugh:
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    I read this thread first. I went back and read the original thread to see if I was missing something, because to me, it's not social etiquette to confront someone about a single farting episode (or if you're going to, do it right then. Run after him and ask if he is ok or something.) I will act very casually when someone farts around me and watch as they scan my face to see if I heard it. Now, since it was a long fart and impossible to have missed, I probably just would have asked if he was ok or feeling sick.

    I think I would have responded in the same way as Jeff. Or I would have wanted to but probably would have been beet red and stammered out an apology.

    He sounds embarrassed. Possibly weird. But I think it's weird to police someone about one fart, too. I can't imagine having that conversation.

    What does seem like some cause for concern is him trying to hug you despite not knowing you and him making comments about you being a minority. It's hard to say not witnessing the conversation and how the comment was made. Hugging was inappropriate, unless you happen to work at a very huggy place, which I doubt you do from the description. But again, I think that could have been another lack of social skills in an awkward and uncomfortable moment.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    PS: I didn't think this thread should pass without this honorable mention:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Gas_We_Pass
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    Omg! Freak wad!
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    I mean, he shouldn't have made that rude racist comment and then fart, if he didn't want us all talking about it on the internet. nomsayin :wink: :flowerforyou:
  • kinkyslinky16
    kinkyslinky16 Posts: 1,469 Member
    Haha Jeff is clearly batsh!t crazy.
    And I stand by my advice to you in the first thread:
    Queef in his office, then bring him a croissant the next day.

    Fight crazy with crazy.

    Can't. stop. laughing. I second the queefing.
  • Barbellarella_
    Barbellarella_ Posts: 454 Member
    Oh.my.goodness.. He went in for a hug?! I literally just Lol'd :laugh:

    Good luck with that guy.. Looking forward to the future stories from your office. :)
  • Kimdbro
    Kimdbro Posts: 922 Member
    I read this thread first. I went back and read the original thread to see if I was missing something, because to me, it's not social etiquette to confront someone about a single farting episode (or if you're going to, do it right then. Run after him and ask if he is ok or something.) I will act very casually when someone farts around me and watch as they scan my face to see if I heard it. Now, since it was a long fart and impossible to have missed, I probably just would have asked if he was ok or feeling sick.

    I think I would have responded in the same way as Jeff. Or I would have wanted to but probably would have been beet red and stammered out an apology.

    He sounds embarrassed. Possibly weird. But I think it's weird to police someone about one fart, too. I can't imagine having that conversation.

    What does seem like some cause for concern is him trying to hug you despite not knowing you and him making comments about you being a minority. It's hard to say not witnessing the conversation and how the comment was made. Hugging was inappropriate, unless you happen to work at a very huggy place, which I doubt you do from the description. But again, I think that could have been another lack of social skills in an awkward and uncomfortable moment.
    ......
    PS: I didn't think this thread should pass without this honorable mention:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Gas_We_Pass

    Jeff.... is that you??? It's OK, this is a 'safe' place... go ahead... tell you're side of the story.

    ****Edited to state (it's not that safe), assuming you are Jeff, because who the hell else would think this was appropriate behavior? .... you don't think it's "social etiquette to confront one single farting episode" ???? Firstly... glad I don't work with or know you, or breathe your air... Just so we're all clear, Ummmm it's NOT social etiquette to FART IN FRONT OF ANOTHER HUMAN BEING AND STINK UP THEIR LIVING SPACE..... EVER... LIKE NOT EVER!.... and if it squeezes out for whatever reason, medical, bad drinking binge, too many burgers at lunch, or otherwise, you certainly don't stare down the poor victim and leave without an apology, a joke, a SOMETHING----ANYTHING, that doesn't suggest that you're a freaking serial killer.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member

    Jeff.... is that you??? It's OK, this is a 'safe' place... go ahead... tell you're side of the story.

    ****Edited to state (it's not that safe), assuming you are Jeff, because who the hell else would think this was appropriate behavior? .... you don't think it's "social etiquette to confront one single farting episode" ???? Firstly... glad I don't work with or know you, or breathe your air... Just so we're all clear, Ummmm it's NOT social etiquette to FART IN FRONT OF ANOTHER HUMAN BEING AND STINK UP THEIR LIVING SPACE..... EVER... LIKE NOT EVER!.... and if it squeezes out for whatever reason, medical, bad drinking binge, too many burgers at lunch, or otherwise, you certainly don't stare down the poor victim and leave without an apology, a joke, a SOMETHING----ANYTHING, that doesn't suggest that you're a freaking serial killer.

    I'm actually quite private about my body functions, so if we cross air space, you're fine. If she wanted to confront him, she should have done it on the spot. Waiting a day and confronting him while supposedly going to thank him for a donut makes her look kind of weird too. See the story in the first thread, where when a lady told her side of her accidental farting story, not a single person accused her of being a serial killer. (Of course it's not social etiquette to pass intentional gas. By him giving her a gift and then denying it happened, I'm not so convinced that it was intentional.)