Make my roommate get a life!

24

Replies

  • kaseyr1505
    kaseyr1505 Posts: 624 Member
    You could move in with someone more compatible and get over it.
  • caracrawford1
    caracrawford1 Posts: 657 Member
    Since I moved away from home I have busted my butt working through school so I didn't have to have a roommate. Politely tell him that you enjoy his company, but you and your friends sometimes need private time alone. Once the lease is up, consider getting your own spot. I would not do the roommate thing.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Tell him to join MFP, he can TC with us and get Kik.
  • baba_helly
    baba_helly Posts: 810 Member
    I'm waiting for the plot twist
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    I'm waiting for the plot twist

    Plot twist: he's dating the girl that doesn't want him at the gym at the same time as her. Can't hang in his living room, can't go to the gym...poor fn guy.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    I hope your roommate finds a better roommate

    Burn!!
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    I'm waiting for the plot twist

    Yes. I'm thinking we don't have all the details here...
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    Hm. Compassion would be a good start. Maybe start introducing him around so he can make friends too? He might need your help and not know how to ask for it. But to shove him out of "your" domain in "your" apartment that, from the tone of your OP, you "allow" him to live in seems very mean girl to me.
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    Hey this is totally not weight loss or fitness related.

    I'm 24 and lived away at college and had an apartment prior to this one. My roommate just moved out of his parent's house and commuted to college. He doesn't have many friends, and almost no hobbies.

    How can I nicely tell him to get a life so I can have the living room sometimes? When I bring friends over he assumes he should be there and involved. We are friends, but not to the point that he needs to always be around my friends and I.

    Advice?

    Live somewhere else? If he's his share of the rent and there's nothing in the contract that he has to vacate the the living room when your friends show up, then you have nothing. Now I'll wait for his forum post asking how to get his roommate to get off his back about him getting a life. I'll tell him the same thing.

    TLDR: just break up
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    I'm waiting for the plot twist

    The roommate is really a blowup doll.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    plot twist inc!
  • _Pseudonymous_
    _Pseudonymous_ Posts: 1,671 Member
    As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.

    A different roommate or to live alone. OP needs a close female friend to live with her.

    From personal experience, living with close friends is a TERRIBLE idea... at least for girls. I have yet to meet friends who ended a living together with a better, or even as strong relationship, as they had before living together.
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    I'm waiting for the plot twist

    The roommate is really a blowup doll.

    I knew it! That's why she can't get him to move. Just laying there, staring...
  • Thewatcher_66
    Thewatcher_66 Posts: 1,643 Member
    If he's paying rent, you're stuck with him. Just make up some roommate agreements
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.

    A different roommate or to live alone. OP needs a close female friend to live with her.

    From personal experience, living with close friends is a TERRIBLE idea... at least for girls. I have yet to meet friends who ended a living together with a better, or even as strong relationship, as they had before living together.

    I have two friends from high school that were from the same circles, but definitely not besties. They moved in together and now they're inseparable. It can work with the right girls. But if one or both parties are into being dramatic/passive-aggressive... yeah no. Not a good idea.
  • sarahrosheen
    sarahrosheen Posts: 82 Member
    LOL
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    This is why I have been close friends with all of my past roommates beforehand. All of our friends would just hang out together, and it was no big deal.
  • RINat612
    RINat612 Posts: 251 Member
    The roommate is male... and your a female...

    :huh:

    Yep!! Times have definitely changed. 20 years ago if a female needed a room mate they advertised for a female room mate. I know a lot of dads out there that would have a fit if they found their daughter had a male room mate. Even adult, 24 year old, daughter.

    Yeah, I know I'm old fashion and all, but I just can't see how the opposite sex can live together and things not get... weird.

    And I would have an issue with my daughter (if I ever have one) living with a male at all. Even if they are in a relationship. And yes, I am one of those "wait for marriage" types.
  • Tyggr56
    Tyggr56 Posts: 6 Member
    If you have never actually told him you'd like him to go elsewhere when you have friends over then do you expect him to be a mind-reader? You gotta say it straight, if he gives you crap then start shopping for a new roommate, if he agrees and sees your opinion then you should be just fine since he sounds like he would work with you and not be an *kitten*.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    OP, you can make your roommate get a life!

    But don't get pissed off when he goes out and makes some hot guy friends and doesn't want YOU hanging around in the living room when HIS friends come over.
  • buzybev
    buzybev Posts: 199 Member
    As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.

    A different roommate or to live alone. OP needs a close female friend to live with her.

    From personal experience, living with close friends is a TERRIBLE idea... at least for girls. I have yet to meet friends who ended a living together with a better, or even as strong relationship, as they had before living together.

    I have two friends from high school that were from the same circles, but definitely not besties. They moved in together and now they're inseparable. It can work with the right girls. But if one or both parties are into being dramatic/passive-aggressive... yeah no. Not a good idea.

    ^^

    I lived with a friend my last two years of undergrad and we are still close. Only thing preventing us from hanging out on a regular basis is the fact that she lives in Florida and I'm in TX. I think it depends on how open the individuals are to talking about issues or things that are bugging them. Problems start when you let things fester.
  • KseRz
    KseRz Posts: 980 Member
    Perhaps the both of you should sit down and establish a roommate agreement?

    a9ab06aeaec4cf5d9e1a28ad5f80d3c2.jpg

    It sounds silly at first, but its times like these you wish you could refer to one.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    Can't you agree some house rules with him?

    I'm sure there's a compromise here which will be workable for you both.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    The roommate is male... and your a female...

    :huh:

    God only knows what they were up to in there, and furthermore Susan I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to learn that all four of them habitually smoked marijuana cigarettes..... reefers

    BWAHA HAHAHAHAHA
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.

    A different roommate or to live alone. OP needs a close female friend to live with her.

    From personal experience, living with close friends is a TERRIBLE idea... at least for girls. I have yet to meet friends who ended a living together with a better, or even as strong relationship, as they had before living together.

    I have two friends from high school that were from the same circles, but definitely not besties. They moved in together and now they're inseparable. It can work with the right girls. But if one or both parties are into being dramatic/passive-aggressive... yeah no. Not a good idea.

    I could easily be roommates with my best friend (and a few other female friends). Thankfully, I have never had to have a roommate and I don't think I would want to, but if I did, I would much prefer a friend than someone I didn't know well or at all.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    You could hang out in your room or outside.

    Hang out in the kitchen.

    Hang out anywhere he's not.

    If he starts following you around tell him you and your guest need some privacy.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    Tell him to join MFP, he can TC with us and get Kik.

    BWAHAHAHAHA
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    The roommate is male... and your a female...

    :huh:

    Yep!! Times have definitely changed. 20 years ago if a female needed a room mate they advertised for a female room mate. I know a lot of dads out there that would have a fit if they found their daughter had a male room mate. Even adult, 24 year old, daughter.

    Yeah, I know I'm old fashion and all, but I just can't see how the opposite sex can live together and things not get... weird.

    And I would have an issue with my daughter (if I ever have one) living with a male at all. Even if they are in a relationship. And yes, I am one of those "wait for marriage" types.
    Steve Rogers, is that you?
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    As an introvert I understand completely how he feels. Sounds like you two are not a good fit as roommates. I would normally advise you to just talk to him about a schedule that allows you each to use the space alone at different times, but in your case you just need a different roommate.

    A different roommate or to live alone. OP needs a close female friend to live with her.

    From personal experience, living with close friends is a TERRIBLE idea... at least for girls. I have yet to meet friends who ended a living together with a better, or even as strong relationship, as they had before living together.

    Yup, just have to chime in that I've only had one female roommate (out of six) that I'm not still friends with and that's because it turned out that she was a manipulative, compulsive lying beyotch - so, just as well. LOL! I'm also the type of person who likes to lay out all expectations from the start so I think that helps. Who does what for cooking, cleaning, how are bills split, etc.

    OP, I agree, if he pays half the rent, he has every right to hang out in his own living room. However, I agree that it wouldn't hurt to ask if he wouldn't mind you having a girls night every couple months. Make sure you check with him before setting those dates and also realize he has every right to refuse the idea.

    If you want a place where you don't have to share space, get your own apartment.

    Also, thanks to all of you for defending introverts!!

    edited because more details and geebus I can't spell today!
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    I had a male roommate in college. I was probably more attracted to my female roommates than I was to him.

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