Telling someone that they gained weight

Unless the other person brings it up first, i think it's a bad idea. If you are concerned about someone's health, it's not a bad idea to try and help them out. Invite them for walks and things like that. However, simply saying "You look like you've gained weight" is a bad idea. It's only going to hurt their feelings and, let's be honest, if you notice their weight gain - they've probably noticed it as well.

I agree that people generally don't need to be told - they may be ignoring it, but they know.

Even if for some reason circumstances dictate that you believe that someone needs to be told, I wouldn't ever consider doing it unless it was an extremely close family member or a partner. But I can't think of a reason you'd need to tell someone at all.

you dont think they have noticed this themselves?

i wouldnt bring it up unless they did

I agree that people generally don't need to be told - they may be ignoring it, but they know.

Even if for some reason circumstances dictate that you believe that someone needs to be told, I wouldn't ever consider doing it unless it was an extremely close family member or a partner. But I can't think of a reason you'd need to tell someone at all.

I agree with you but I clealy stated in my post that I am not planning to tell anyone or would tell someone unless if its my child and it was a health concern.I have been told in the past and I hated it. this question was hypothetical question

And I never said you were. I don't know how you expect people to answer your question without making at least the hypothetical assumption that someone is hypothetically thinking of telling someone that they've put on weight.

I took into account your saying you weren't intending on doing so, but could think of no way else to phrase a response that makes sense.

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No, I have never told anyone that they have gained weight.

I didn't mean here, and I should have specified that. I find that almost everyone here is extremely supportive. I meant people on my Facebook (which is why I posted the status there) and some people that I know personally.

I'm the type of person that doesn't really think before speaking and I just say the first thing that comes to mind so yes i've told family and friends that they've gained weight.

I never feel like it's acceptable to comment on someone's weight, tbh. Especially as a negative. It's their body, they *know*. They don't need you compounding whatever issues they have under the guise of being concerned for their health.

One of my best friends and I went to a theme park today. I've dropped significant weight, and I can absolutely feel the difference between now and last year - how I fit the rides, how much energy I have, how I cope with the heat and with walking. My friend, who was larger than I was to begin with, has gained. She needs extra help getting into rides with safety bars. She has to rest every twenty minutes or so. Her heat tolerance is non-existent.

I'm worried, but I'm not going to say anything. Not directly. It's not my body and therefore none of my business whatsoever, even if I love her. She can take care of her body however she wants to.

What I WILL do is chatter on about my zumba class and the 5ks I'm running, my favorite recipes and how much better I feel and how much happier I am when I'm eating good food. I'll talk about my life, and if our paths should cross, grand. She's started asking me for advice so if she wants help, I'm here. I'll do whatever she wants me to do.

But I sure as hell won't guilt her into doing it.

I never have... I only notice when that person themselves show signs of discomfort with their weight. For instance, they would avoid food offered to them or they'd start talking about exercising when normally they wouldn't. That's when I realize and think, oh, this person does look a little heavier I think?? Some people can pick it up right away but usually, I can't really tell if someone looks different for some reason. In some cultures, it's okay to talk about weight to anyone. Like in my culture, a lot of people talk about other people's weight and looks openly but in the US, I think people generally avoid talking about weight. Like I would not tell an acquaintance or my co-worker she has gained weight and needs to lose it even if I was worried about her; it'd be considered very rude and weight is such a sensitive topic for a lot of people here. However, if this person is really close to you and you are worried about them, then telling them would be okay in my book. I'm a blunt person anyways and most people that knows me, knows this fact about me. I won't sugar coat it either.

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Its a very touchy subject!

Before I lost my weight, I had a co-worker come up to me and say that he hears a congratulations is in order! I'm like what are you talking about, and he says, "You're pregnant". I said ummm I'm not. He was sooooooooo embarrassed and his girlfriend smacked him for saying it. I laughed it off at the time being, but it got me thinking, wow, I really need to do something about this. To this day, I never let him live it down whenever i see him LOL.

^^^^^^^^^^^This happened to me too except that it was my unlce who put his hand on my stomach and asked if I was expecting...................He is an OBGYN!!!!! It really hurt my feelings but I needed to hear it. I got too comfortable being overweight. I worked my butt of and lost over 43 pounds

However, fast forward two years later, and I have gained back 20 of it and my boyfriend has also gained about 20 pounds since we have been together. I tell my boyfriend all the time that he has gained too much and he tells me right back. We tease each other and we don't get hurt by it because we know we are just looking out for each other. I would never tell a stranger though. They may not care that they are gaining weight and pointing it out is rude. You have to have a special relationship with someone to be able to talk openly about weight because society makes it a sensitive issue.

If someone wants to be overweight, don't criticize them or tell them they are wrong, just educate them by just talking about your own transformation. If they are interested and ask questions, help them lose it. If they don't seem to care and love to eat McDonalds, then leave it alone. That's my opinion.

Never, because it's none of my f***ing business.

I know how much I weigh and what I look like naked, I'm fairly certain they're aware of their own weight and appearance. Having me point it out is redundant.

If it's a concern about their health... They are usually significantly overweight and have been for some time. If it's a VERY close family member and you have the appropriate relationship with them... Then you can approach them out of concern for their health, but chances are quite good they are very well aware they are overweight and so you don't even need to point it out. Its kind of like "well, duh!" And It's basically just an insult then. Personally, I wouldn't even do it then. I have no room to talk. And I'm not a doctor, so there is nothing I can say even to a close family member that they don't already know. If it's not a genuine concern about their well-being and health... I would NEVER comment on ANYONE'S weight at all... EVER. Particularly a gain. It's plain rude and none of my business.