Self-Acceptance or Complacency or Just Whining
rosebette
Posts: 1,660 Member
I've been at a 2-month plateau. I'm maintaining on a 1200 net (eating back exercise calories). I'm older, 55, short, 5'1.5", and around 120 lbs. About 3 weeks ago, I began on the CRON system, which is calorie restriction for optimal nutrition, that's put me around 1040 net, again still subtracting or eating back exercise calories. Still nothing lost, although the cronometer has made me aware of my micronutrient gaps, so I'm probably eating more nutritiously than I was before. It's been suggested that I would make progress if I stop eating back the exercise calories and stick to a target of 1100 a day, and I see lots of successful folks on this site losing by big deficits and not eating back.. However, I'm finding that if I work out -- strength training for a long time, or do a hard cardio thing like kickboxing, I am famished to the point of light headedness and absolutely have to eat right afterwards, not anything huge, but maybe 4 oz. of yogurt and some fruit or a protein bar. Then, by the end of the day I have maybe 300-400 calories left for dinner if that. I see people on this site who are my size getting down to 110 lbs. or lower, just by not eating back, and I'm beginning to wonder if I am giving in to complacency, not really being committed enough to the goal to give up those few extra calories. Also, I do a cheat day once a week, which I know I would have to give up if I want my goal. Part of me is saying just assume that 1200 + exercise calories is my maintenance and accept my 55-year-old body as it is and enjoy my life. It's a healthy body, fairly fit, but not superlean. And some days, I'm just tired -- tired of sore joints, counting everything, feeling guilty about the cheat day or even eating too much of the wrong oatmeal. The other part is saying I'm not trying hard enough. I'm going on a beach vacation in a couple of weeks with my sister who is 2 inches taller and about 114 lbs. and who complains she is getting heavy. Compared to her I do look like a little pudgelet and she talks about not wanting to be one of those older women who "lets herself go" (like you know who, maybe?) Then some days I think how important is it? Am I supposed to spend an extra hour in the gym when I should be correcting my students' papers, or going to that non-profit meeting I committed to?
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Do you know your TDEE? I ask because with your age, height and weight plus the type of exercise you describe doing, I would think it would be about 1700. Eating 1100 a day or even 1200 should leave you with at least a 500 calorie daily deficit. Now, unless you are eating 4000 calories on your cheat day each week, it sure seems like you should be losing weight.
I don't see the point in eating so little and exercising so much that you feel light headed. Surely you can eat 1500 calories every day, and still lose slowly. A half-pound a week loss would be about right considering how little you have to lose, right? I would think the goal would be to eat as much as you possibly can that still allows you to slowly lose.0 -
If you're light headed during exercise, you are not properly fueled. Once is a mistake, repeatedly is a systemic issue that needs addressing.
You comment on women your height reaching 110 pounds. What is their body fat percentage? How much lean mass are they carrying? If you don't know and all you go on is a single data point in a vacuum you really have nothing to compare.0 -
My TDEE as lightly active is around 1500. However, I guess there's some debate about what we should use as a guideline. Some say if you eat at TDEE then you should use that and not "eat back" exercise calories because it includes that. If I'm eating 1200 I'm only at a 300 calorie deficit. With my current info I'm set to lose .5 to .8 a week.0
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The only thing that works for me is keeping things simple. A weekly deficit of 3500 cals is equivalent to a 1lb loss. I'm 36 yr old female 5ft 7 and 178lb and I eat 1600 cals a day & loose weight. It makes no difference what I eat in terms of carbs, fat, protein etc - as long as I have a healthy deficit I loose. Only thing that will make me stall, is if I am dehydrated - I aim to drink 12-15 glasses of water a day.
First of all you should work out your BMR - you should not be eating below that level (this is energy you need just to exist - for your body to carry out normal functions). Also, It is not recommended that you eat below 1200 cals anyway & if you are light headed, its a sign that you are not getting enough nutrition.
It also depends how accurately you track both cals consumed & cals burned. If you over estimate cals burned & then eat back those cals, you will not have a good enough deficit. If you don't have a huge amount of weight to loose, then you shoudl really only aim for very small losses each week.0 -
My BMR (as estimated by the cronometer) is 1193 and my TDEE (MFP) is 1510. This week-end's cheat day was around 2400, an Olive Garden meal, so pretty typical for a week-end with 1 dinner out. Sometimes it's lower if we have Japanese/sushi. The rest of the day I eat normally, so it's not a pigout day. I guess I would understand a slow loss but we're talking no loss, and not a 2-weak plateau, 2 months +.
Most of the people my size who are 110 do have less body fat than I do both the ones I see on the site and people I know. My sister who is 114 is much leaner than I am and moves a lot faster than I do because she has a big dog she walks and also I had a foot injury that slows me down, so my walking MPH is not what I'd like. When I started my workplace weight loss program in January my bodyfat was high -- over 35% now it's around 34%. My looks are deceptive because I don't have any belly fat -- you can actually see my ribs and abs in a 2-piece bathing suit but I have a very feminine figure, 36-28-37, yeah I have hips and a bust.. I do still have surface fat on my upper arms so although I have some muscle visibility I don't have a real "cut." So there's no question that I still have work to do on my body comp.0 -
I am 61 and 5' 3 1/2." My ideal weight is 112.
There is no need to settle for holding on to a few vanity pounds.
The loss of only a few pounds can make an incredible difference on a petite frame! I am talking, a serious, dramatic difference! You may need to see it to believe it-- but if you decide to get rid of the vanity pounds, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.
I do not exercise at all because, frankly, I am unwilling to put myself through that. I just do not like exercise. So I am not in a position to advise you about eating back exercise calories. All I know is that dieting without exercise works excellently for me. Then again, you may be shooting for muscle definition, which is something I do not want for myself. And even tho I am a couple of inches taller than you, it's possible that you look thinner at 120 than I did, because you may carry more muscle. I personally don't want to be model-thin.
But I know I am a "pudgelet" at 120, devoid of a waist, and at 112 slender and with a waist. The difference is striking.0 -
I am 61 and 5' 3 1/2." My ideal weight is 112.
There is no need to settle for holding on to a few vanity pounds.
The loss of only a few pounds can make an incredible difference on a petite frame! I am talking, a serious, dramatic difference! You may need to see it to believe it-- but if you decide to get rid of the vanity pounds, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.
I do not exercise at all because, frankly, I am unwilling to put myself through that. I just do not like exercise. So I am not in a position to advise you about eating back exercise calories. All I know is that dieting without exercise works excellently for me. Then again, you may be shooting for muscle definition, which is something I do not want for myself. And even tho I am a couple of inches taller than you, it's possible that you look thinner at 120 than I did, because you may carry more muscle. I personally don't want to be model-thin.
But I know I am a "pudgelet" at 120, devoid of a waist, and at 112 slender and with a waist. The difference is striking.
You don't exercise .... you don't eat (averaging under 700 total calories per day for the last month) .... what you do eat is devoid of nutritional value (protein, have you heard of it?) ... and you still don't have the body you want. If anything, your advice is contraindicated by your own lack of progress (not to mention all science).0 -
It is the curse of small size that a few pounds do make a difference in terms of appearance. I know most women my height have way smaller measurements; my own were around 34-24-35 many moons ago in my college days at between 105-110.
I have no intention of stopping exercising, although I am finding that I have to modify my routines. I need to keep good bone density and avoid muscle wasting that occurs as I age. I guess I'm just feeling frustrated and a bit burned out. Today I did power yoga stationary bike, and later I'll do my 1 1/2 mile walk, and I feel fine. But if I do kickboxing or one of the strength training/circuit classes with younger instructors, I feel completely wiped out.
I got on the scale today, and I was actually up to 122 lbs. for whatever reason, even though I'm eating less than what I was a year ago when I was around this weight and not really tracking.0 -
I am 61 and 5' 3 1/2." My ideal weight is 112.
There is no need to settle for holding on to a few vanity pounds.
The loss of only a few pounds can make an incredible difference on a petite frame! I am talking, a serious, dramatic difference! You may need to see it to believe it-- but if you decide to get rid of the vanity pounds, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.
I do not exercise at all because, frankly, I am unwilling to put myself through that. I just do not like exercise. So I am not in a position to advise you about eating back exercise calories. All I know is that dieting without exercise works excellently for me. Then again, you may be shooting for muscle definition, which is something I do not want for myself. And even tho I am a couple of inches taller than you, it's possible that you look thinner at 120 than I did, because you may carry more muscle. I personally don't want to be model-thin.
But I know I am a "pudgelet" at 120, devoid of a waist, and at 112 slender and with a waist. The difference is striking.
You don't exercise .... you don't eat (averaging under 700 total calories per day for the last month) .... what you do eat is devoid of nutritional value (protein, have you heard of it?) ... and you still don't have the body you want. If anything, your advice is contraindicated by your own lack of progress (not to mention all science).
My ticker doesn't reflect my progress, because I haven't weighed myself yet during this diet. I am actually very close to my goal. I will be weighing and updating my ticker soon. My weight loss on this diet has been extraordinary.0 -
I am 61 and 5' 3 1/2." My ideal weight is 112.
There is no need to settle for holding on to a few vanity pounds.
The loss of only a few pounds can make an incredible difference on a petite frame! I am talking, a serious, dramatic difference! You may need to see it to believe it-- but if you decide to get rid of the vanity pounds, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.
I do not exercise at all because, frankly, I am unwilling to put myself through that. I just do not like exercise. So I am not in a position to advise you about eating back exercise calories. All I know is that dieting without exercise works excellently for me. Then again, you may be shooting for muscle definition, which is something I do not want for myself. And even tho I am a couple of inches taller than you, it's possible that you look thinner at 120 than I did, because you may carry more muscle. I personally don't want to be model-thin.
But I know I am a "pudgelet" at 120, devoid of a waist, and at 112 slender and with a waist. The difference is striking.
You don't exercise .... you don't eat (averaging under 700 total calories per day for the last month) .... what you do eat is devoid of nutritional value (protein, have you heard of it?) ... and you still don't have the body you want. If anything, your advice is contraindicated by your own lack of progress (not to mention all science).
What does she eat? The diary function isn't working for me today for some reason0 -
I am 61 and 5' 3 1/2." My ideal weight is 112.
There is no need to settle for holding on to a few vanity pounds.
The loss of only a few pounds can make an incredible difference on a petite frame! I am talking, a serious, dramatic difference! You may need to see it to believe it-- but if you decide to get rid of the vanity pounds, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.
I do not exercise at all because, frankly, I am unwilling to put myself through that. I just do not like exercise. So I am not in a position to advise you about eating back exercise calories. All I know is that dieting without exercise works excellently for me. Then again, you may be shooting for muscle definition, which is something I do not want for myself. And even tho I am a couple of inches taller than you, it's possible that you look thinner at 120 than I did, because you may carry more muscle. I personally don't want to be model-thin.
But I know I am a "pudgelet" at 120, devoid of a waist, and at 112 slender and with a waist. The difference is striking.
You don't exercise .... you don't eat (averaging under 700 total calories per day for the last month) .... what you do eat is devoid of nutritional value (protein, have you heard of it?) ... and you still don't have the body you want. If anything, your advice is contraindicated by your own lack of progress (not to mention all science).
What does she eat? The diary function isn't working for me today for some reason
Diet soda, pringles, and bean dip seem to be the main players in her diet.
I would politely ask that you don't give nutritional or fitness advice to anyone, as it seems you are not at all qualified to give it.
OP, have you spoken with a nutritionist about this? You are very active to be consuming this little food. Especially since you've been experiencing recurring bouts of being lightheaded, I would think you'd need to increase your calories at least to 15-1600.0 -
Sigh. First of all, I think you look fabulous and I commend you for being so active! But I really think you will enjoy your vacation much more if you stop comparing yourself to your sister and just enjoy being you.
Look around the world and you will see that it could be a LOT worse! Life is very short and we should enjoy it as much as we can. As to your diet, your calories do sound pretty low. Are you definitely weighing everything you eat? What happens if you try to gradually increase them? Also if you try to get 30% cals from protein it really does help with satiety. 0 -
In late spring when I finished with the workplace fitness weight loss program and I was netting around 1200, the nutritionist said that it might be very hard for me to lose much more because it's hard to maintain a deficit at my smaller size and that with my level of workouts, I do have some muscle mass. By the way I haven't just started working out, but I've been woring out for years; however since January, I have been more consistent. The lightheadedness is very recent, after I dropped my net to 1040. I really do miss those extra 160 calories so I'm thinking of up-ing them. I saw my doctor recently, and I'm in good health, just very high cholesterol, which I'm trying to reduce through diet and exercise. I had a nice long walk and talk with my son who is into bodybuilding, and he says I should try eating more for a week, not focus on heavy cardio but more on strength, and see what happens. I complain about my husband and sons, but they are really very affirming and supportive of me.
As far as the poster above who said her goal is 112, she's posted on other threads and I'm ignoring her. I would literally die (and as an English teacher I mean literally) if I ate what she does and worked out.
Yeah I shouldn't compare myself with my sister. It's amazing what happens when you have to put a bathing suit on in front of someone who is very fit and has never had children. All the insecurities come out.0 -
Feel free to ignore me, we'll see who ends up fatter, me the one who has avoided exercise for 61 years, or most of y'all that exercise and ruin your metabolism with long slow dieting.
Eating less than 800 calories a day in Pringles and soda isn't long slow dieting? Also exercise doesn't ruin your metabolism, it increases it. That's why the BMR is higher for people who exercise than those who don't.0 -
Feel free to ignore me, we'll see who ends up fatter, me the one who has avoided exercise for 61 years, or most of y'all that exercise and ruin your metabolism with long slow dieting.
The human brain needs more carbs per day than you've provided your body in weeks. That macronutrient deficit shows in your posts.0 -
OP, I hate to be rude, but your post is so depressing. You eat so little, you work out a ton, you feel sick, you're insecure yet you are actually healthy and look great so why are you killing yourself??? Feeling guilty about a meal out once a week? you shouldn't feel guilty about that. That's so harsh.
I know what envy is, and I know what sisters are, but listen- even at my biggest I went out in a bikini and felt like the most beautiful creature on the planet. I know I'm not, but that didn't stop me. Unfortunately, we all have different bodies, and if I am curvy and short, I gotta love it no matter what. I won't ever have smaller knees and longer legs. But I am still good enough.
Please love yourself a bit more.0 -
Feel free to ignore me, we'll see who ends up fatter, me the one who has avoided exercise for 61 years, or most of y'all that exercise and ruin your metabolism with long slow dieting.
Eating less than 800 calories a day in Pringles and soda isn't long slow dieting? Also exercise doesn't ruin your metabolism, it increases it. That's why the BMR is higher for people who exercise than those who don't.
Some people are too foolish to deal with facts. Sadly, they often spout their inane ideas to others as so-called advice.
I'm not really a fan of focusing solely on what the scale says. Body composition tells more about your fitness level than your weight. Knowing what your lean mass and body fat are gives you usable information to guide your plan moving forward and make any necessary goal changes. Would you trade a carrying a couple extra pounds for a more healthy lean mass to fat ratio?0 -
I should have inserted a comma-- I am aware that exercise increases metabolism. However, from what I see on these forums, the majority of those people on here who exercise are unsuccessful in weight loss, because they are consuming too many calories. Why isn't their recommended caloric intake working? It's set too high, that's why. The "ruin metabolism" refers to long slow dieting-- losing one pound, a half-pound, per week for months and months. I never diet for long, and my metabolism remains fast.0
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I should have inserted a comma-- I am aware that exercise increases metabolism. However, from what I see on these forums, the majority of those people on here who exercise are unsuccessful in weight loss, because they are consuming too many calories. Why isn't their recommended caloric intake working? It's set too high, that's why. The "ruin metabolism" refers to long slow dieting-- losing one pound, a half-pound, per week for months and months. I never diet for long, and my metabolism remains fast.
You claim to be a voice of reason yet post the most asinine concepts on the forum.0 -
OP, I hate to be rude, but your post is so depressing. You eat so little, you work out a ton, you feel sick, you're insecure yet you are actually healthy and look great so why are you killing yourself??? Feeling guilty about a meal out once a week? you shouldn't feel guilty about that. That's so harsh.
I know what envy is, and I know what sisters are, but listen- even at my biggest I went out in a bikini and felt like the most beautiful creature on the planet. I know I'm not, but that didn't stop me. Unfortunately, we all have different bodies, and if I am curvy and short, I gotta love it no matter what. I won't ever have smaller knees and longer legs. But I am still good enough.
Please love yourself a bit more.
No, you're not rude. You are being honest and sensible. Thanks for the reality check.0 -
Feel free to ignore me, we'll see who ends up fatter, me the one who has avoided exercise for 61 years, or most of y'all that exercise and ruin your metabolism with long slow dieting.
Yes. We'll see. :noway:
And no, I won't ignore, because when idiotic and downright dangerous advice is given on the forums, I feel it absolutely necessary to refute it, not only for the OP asking questions but the countless users who silently read these forums.0 -
In late spring when I finished with the workplace fitness weight loss program and I was netting around 1200, the nutritionist said that it might be very hard for me to lose much more because it's hard to maintain a deficit at my smaller size and that with my level of workouts, I do have some muscle mass. By the way I haven't just started working out, but I've been woring out for years; however since January, I have been more consistent. The lightheadedness is very recent, after I dropped my net to 1040. I really do miss those extra 160 calories so I'm thinking of up-ing them. I saw my doctor recently, and I'm in good health, just very high cholesterol, which I'm trying to reduce through diet and exercise. I had a nice long walk and talk with my son who is into bodybuilding, and he says I should try eating more for a week, not focus on heavy cardio but more on strength, and see what happens. I complain about my husband and sons, but they are really very affirming and supportive of me.
As far as the poster above who said her goal is 112, she's posted on other threads and I'm ignoring her. I would literally die (and as an English teacher I mean literally) if I ate what she does and worked out.
Yeah I shouldn't compare myself with my sister. It's amazing what happens when you have to put a bathing suit on in front of someone who is very fit and has never had children. All the insecurities come out.
I agree with your son. You look great, and I think you should eat maintenance and try strength training to change your shape rather than the number on the scale.0 -
Just because you're short doesn't mean you have to weigh 100 pounds. I am 5'1" and 120 looks nearly perfect for me. Anything less and I look sickly. How do you really feel at 120? Strong? Fit? Healthy? Do you truly feel "fat" at 120, or are you focused on a lower number purely because of your height?0
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head:deskFeel free to ignore me, we'll see who ends up fatter, me the one who has avoided exercise for 61 years, or most of y'all that exercise and ruin your metabolism with long slow dieting.0 -
Just because you're short doesn't mean you have to weigh 100 pounds. I am 5'1" and 120 looks nearly perfect for me. Anything less and I look sickly. How do you really feel at 120? Strong? Fit? Healthy? Do you truly feel "fat" at 120, or are you focused on a lower number purely because of your height?
For a while, I felt good at 120 but I wonder if I am just "settling" when I read about and see women who weigh less. It is on the high side of normal BMI. In terms of health, I feel good but over the past two weeks cut calories too low and am feeling it. I'm going to be taking the advice of so many and upping calories; if I want to recomp, it's hard to get enough protein on a low net.0 -
if you keep working out hard without eating enough food - and particularly enough protein - you're breaking down muscle tissue your body doesn't have the calories to replace. that means that in a resting state you burn LESS calories.
btw, BMI tends to be very much an average that doesn't apply to me, and chances are it won't apply to you as it sounds like you're quite active, so are possibly higher than normal lean muscle mass. recently when i weighed 171 pounds i was about 40% body fat but according to my BMI i was 30.5%. years ago when i was a gym rat i weighed the exact same thing - 171 pounds - and was well under 25% body fat, so at either time BMI was pretty much totally wrong.0 -
B0
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Let's see exercise...Feel free to ignore me, we'll see who ends up fatter, me the one who has avoided exercise for 61 years, or most of y'all that exercise and ruin your metabolism with long slow dieting.
Increases endorphins (feel good hormone), lifting depression
Increases "good cholesterol"
Improves cardiovascular (heart health)
Increases libido
Improves muscle tone and bone density--reducing the risk of injury to falls and osteoporosis as one ages
Improves circulation
I could go on and on.
But most importantly it improves quality of life and lengthens life span. So home girl who doesn't exercise will be more likely to die sooner and she'll be skinny fat once she does croak.0 -
Quality of life? Exercise is agony. Is, torture. Suffer tremendously, so that I can live, and suffer, longer?
I agree with you that exercise could have health benefits and possibly prolong life. It absolutely does not improve depression in my case, for it agitates me and makes me hostile. I am told this is adrenaline.
No health benefit, nor increased lifespan, is worth the intense anguish of chest pain/not being able to breathe due to physical exertion. Not to mention the muscle pains. I have experienced agonizing pain from physical exertion my entire life, from as far back as I can recall (age 3.) LONG before I became a vegan; LONG before I EVER dieted.
My only health.problem is anemia/pernicious anemia due to not financially being able to afford nutritious vegan food or vegan supplements. Other than that, I am the healthiest person I know, and here is proof positive (WARNING: graphic TMI !!!!)-- until November 29, 2012, when one of my enemies gave me poisoned coffee, I had not puked since December 25, 1975, when I got food poisoning. That is less than one month shy of 37 years without ever puking. I don't believe many people can attest to a streak like that. Not the folks I know, anyway.0 -
Quality of life? Exercise is agony. Is, torture. Suffer tremendously, so that I can live, and suffer, longer?
I agree with you that exercise could have health benefits and possibly prolong life. It absolutely does not improve depression in my case, for it agitates me and makes me hostile. I am told this is adrenaline.
No health benefit, nor increased lifespan, is worth the intense anguish of chest pain/not being able to breathe due to physical exertion. Not to mention the muscle pains. I have experienced agonizing pain from physical exertion my entire life, from as far back as I can recall (age 3.) LONG before I became a vegan; LONG before I EVER dieted.
My only health.problem is anemia/pernicious anemia due to not financially being able to afford nutritious vegan food or vegan supplements. Other than that, I am the healthiest person I know, and here is proof positive (WARNING: graphic TMI !!!!)-- until November 29, 2012, when one of my enemies gave me poisoned coffee, I had not puked since December 25, 1975, when I got food poisoning. That is less than one month shy of 37 years without ever puking. I don't believe many people can attest to a streak like that. Not the folks I know, anyway.
If you are having chest pains that you describe as anguish during exercise, that is pretty serious; you probably should be seeing a doctor. Chest pains are not the same as soreness from overexertion.
My daughter was a vegan (now she's vegetarian) while she was a college student on a budget, and she was able to get many healthy vegan foods that were affordable. She learned to make inexpensive casseroles with beans and such and joined a farmer's market coooperative so she could get reasonable fresh foods. She didn't live on soda and Pringles. You can get a can of 99% fat free Progresso lentil soup for the same price as a can of Pringles.
I wouldn't consider not puking in 37 years a sign of health, just of a strong digestion.0
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