Negative Language About Thin People

I myself am neither thin enough nor fat enough to likely be a victim of thin-bashing or fat-bashing. I've seen plenty of both on these forums, but it seems that thin-bashing is the more rampant on this site. It appears to me that, here on MFP at least, there exists far more acceptance of people that are considered too fat than people who are considered too thin.

AND: the answer to "What does he see in HER?" is always. always:

"She is an anatomically complete female."

It appears to me that, here on MFP at least, there exists far more acceptance of people that are considered too fat than people who are considered too thin.

In my experience, when folks are called out for being "too thin" on here, it's generally because they aspire to have a BMI below the medically healthy range. I do see more people here aspiring to be morbidly underweight than aspiring to be morbidly overweight. Striving to be morbidly obese doesn't require MFP.

It's so sad isn't it! Like you, I've also been thin, in fact apart from getting a bit chubby for a few years after university, I was thin most of my adult life. I gained 70lbs in 3 years during a very difficult time.

It has been very revealing seeing the reactions on both sides. I've had people say 'oh I'm so glad you're not one of those gym bunny thin freaks anymore' . This from a supposed friend who should know how unhappy I was with my weight gain and how helpless I was feeling at the time. Instead, she was just happy she didn't have to feel uncomfortable eating whatever she wanted in front of me, that's what she said.

Yes I'm fat now but I do not make negative comments towards people whose figure I wish I had. I know how I got fat, I know what I have to do to fix it and now I'm doing it. As much as I might envy someone their figure, I also know that there is no sense in feeling negative about that person. Most thin people stay that way by not overindulging. Some work very very hard indeed. Some are lovely people, some are not. You know nothing about them by seeing only their figure. You know nothing about their journey and their battles.

By calling them skinny btches, you say a lot more about yourself.

Isn't thin where we on here all want to be anyway!? So do we suddenly morph into btches once we get there.... Sigh, there is nothing like jealousy to bring out the worst in women.

As you should, you look great! Negativity is an attention *kitten* - I honestly believe there are way more positive thoughts towards people with such an amazing figure but they just don't get the airtime or demand to be heard as much as negativity does.

Argh, this post was an attempt to reply to the comment above mine but it seems I'm too stupid to reply on her comment. I give up

I am 100% guilty of this. "She needs to eat a bacon sandwich with mayo..." is said more times than I care to admit in my house. Never to anyone's face... but, truly, does that matter? I guess I just never really thought about how it would be rude or disrespectful, or hurtful... If someone said that to me, I'd be like "woo hoo!" and feel like they saw me as skinny.

I don't know how we got off on the ~men throwing things out car windows at fat women~ tangent, and I think the "men do this" and "women do this" trend in this thread is bull****. People can be mean, rude, disrespectful, hurtful.... people come in all shapes, sizes, races, genders.....

I guess, for myself, I will trend away from the "eat a bacon sandwich" comments and try to teach my son that people come in all shapes, sizes, races and genders. Some are mean, some are not.

It can be very hurtful.

I've had people tell me things like that, and I've overheard people saying it behind my back (and I am far from catty... not directed at you, directed at another post... I actually keep to myself due to social anxiety). And it hurts. It is especially hurtful to someone suffering from an eating disorder. I'd love to eat a bacon sandwich, but when I do, I'm riddled with not only guilt, but bad stomach cramping and bloating.

The fact is, you never know what is going on in a person's life. You never know why they are skinny, or fat, or fit. Not even fit people are always healthy, by the way. Many of them suffer from exercise bulimia, or orthorexia, or a similar disorder. You just never know.

Being told to 'go eat a cheeseburger' hurts me just as much now as being told to stop eating did when I was fat. Maybe more, actually, because I'm hypersensitive to comments regarding my body. Yesterday my mom asked me if I'd lost weight again (just two lbs, unintentionally, I didn't think anyone would even notice) and said that my legs looked like pencils. Even that comment kind of followed me all day, and it wasn't meant to be mean. Someone commenting on my weight or size to intentionally be mean or spiteful follows me even longer.

It's easy to say not to let things get to you, harder to practice when you have reasons for thinking the way you do. I don't want to be hypersensitive to such comments. No one wants to.

I cannot follow this thread. There is a lot going on. I will say that I have experienced negative language toward my body when I was fat (have had people moo at me, had a lady slow down long enough to shout that I had made her lose her appetite, etc) but I've gotten it when thin, too. Just in a different way. (Skinny b****, eat a cheeseburger, etc)

One can blame it on the magazines... but I don't even read those stupid magazines. (Stereotypes suck, you know)

I have experienced it. Many people have. It doesn't mean everyone does it. Certainly, there are people who haven't experienced it (or don't notice it due to higher self esteem? food for thought). And there are obviously men and women who don't body shame at all. That doesn't change the fact that some people are either A) cruel or clueless to how their words may affect someone who doesn't have high self esteem.

Also want to say that I was only talking about things that are harmless and consensual and of age. I don't know what bbc is, so I am not commenting on that.

and now you know.

BBC=big black chickens??? ; ^ D

It is something I noticed as I started losing more weight and becoming fitter. It used to bother me, now I just sashay my sexy *kitten* right past them with a smirk.

I get that from women as well. I cannot put into words how little I care about their opinions. I worked my a** off (literally) to get where I am, and I refuse to apologize for it. I have realized that no matter who you are, what you look like, or what you are doing in life, someone is going to have a problem with it.

I am 100% guilty of this. "She needs to eat a bacon sandwich with mayo..." is said more times than I care to admit in my house. Never to anyone's face... but, truly, does that matter? I guess I just never really thought about how it would be rude or disrespectful, or hurtful... If someone said that to me, I'd be like "woo hoo!" and feel like they saw me as skinny.

I don't know how we got off on the ~men throwing things out car windows at fat women~ tangent, and I think the "men do this" and "women do this" trend in this thread is bull****. People can be mean, rude, disrespectful, hurtful.... people come in all shapes, sizes, races, genders.....

I guess, for myself, I will trend away from the "eat a bacon sandwich" comments and try to teach my son that people come in all shapes, sizes, races and genders. Some are mean, some are not.

It can be very hurtful.

I've had people tell me things like that, and I've overheard people saying it behind my back (and I am far from catty... not directed at you, directed at another post... I actually keep to myself due to social anxiety). And it hurts. It is especially hurtful to someone suffering from an eating disorder. I'd love to eat a bacon sandwich, but when I do, I'm riddled with not only guilt, but bad stomach cramping and bloating.

The fact is, you never know what is going on in a person's life. You never know why they are skinny, or fat, or fit. Not even fit people are always healthy, by the way. Many of them suffer from exercise bulimia, or orthorexia, or a similar disorder. You just never know.

Being told to 'go eat a cheeseburger' hurts me just as much now as being told to stop eating did when I was fat. Maybe more, actually, because I'm hypersensitive to comments regarding my body. Yesterday my mom asked me if I'd lost weight again (just two lbs, unintentionally, I didn't think anyone would even notice) and said that my legs looked like pencils. Even that comment kind of followed me all day, and it wasn't meant to be mean. Someone commenting on my weight or size to intentionally be mean or spiteful follows me even longer.

It's easy to say not to let things get to you, harder to practice when you have reasons for thinking the way you do. I don't want to be hypersensitive to such comments. No one wants to.

I cannot follow this thread. There is a lot going on. I will say that I have experienced negative language toward my body when I was fat (have had people moo at me, had a lady slow down long enough to shout that I had made her lose her appetite, etc) but I've gotten it when thin, too. Just in a different way. (Skinny b****, eat a cheeseburger, etc)

One can blame it on the magazines... but I don't even read those stupid magazines. (Stereotypes suck, you know)

I have experienced it. Many people have. It doesn't mean everyone does it. Certainly, there are people who haven't experienced it (or don't notice it due to higher self esteem? food for thought). And there are obviously men and women who don't body shame at all. That doesn't change the fact that some people are either A) cruel or clueless to how their words may affect someone who doesn't have high self esteem.

You never replied to me on the other thread where you posted about this exact thing. I'm sorry you've had a hard time in life, but the question still remains; "What are you going to do about it?" You don't mention anywhere that you have taken matters into your own hands, you don't talk about working hard on your situation, but it's like you're still living and re-living all the bad stuff that happened to you.

I strongly encourage you to seek help, if you haven't already, to be able to move on from those events, so that each time you recall them you don't have to feel the same feelings any longer, but it's just something in your past. Work on being a strong person rather than use the wrong-doings of others as reasons not to move on.

As for the words that come out of other people's mouths, it is your responsibility to take care of yourself and make yourself strong, no matter how others behave around you. Yes, it is wrong of people to behave like *kitten*, but it is most certainly also wrong of you not to claim responsibility of your own happiness.

Briefly reading through all of this I have seen a lot of the fat shaming of women blamed on men, but I think this goes both ways and both sexes are equally as bad as each other.

For example, I was always fit, always in relatively good shape until medication change and a bad breakup casued me to stop caring about myself and my weight ballooned up to 123 kg (~270lb). At this time, newly single and thinking it was about time to get out again, I realised that I may not have had any 'fat' comments directly, but I constantly was ignored by the fairer sex, almost 90% of the time if I spoke to a women, looked at in disgust and then had backs turned to me. It got a little hurtful and more than put me off of bothering to meet someone new. Worse case was someone who told me I looked disgusting and why should someone like her be interested in someone like me.

I then saw a photo of myself, realised I was looking awful compared to what I had used to look like and decided to sort myself out. Fast forward to now where I am down to 92kg, still very heavy for my height of 5'6", but I have always carried a lot of muscle and now have 19% body fat. So I am relatively built for a short guy.

Decided to start going out and definitely get a lot more interest now and the woman who told me I look disgusting, hit on me recently. Now I can't believe that people are that shallow, but it has made me think.

Anyway, to cut a long waffling post short, at the end of the day, male or female, we are all the same, we all have our issues and we all are capable of being down right rude or insulting as well as supporting anyone, in this particular case, that has any form of weight issues. It definitely should not be a man vs woman thing. Quite frankly that is just exacerbating the issues.