Joint Facebook Account w/ Your SO?

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  • silencioesoro
    silencioesoro Posts: 318 Member
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    Mine refuses to open up a FB account - which is fine. I have the majority of his family on mine because we can't talk over the phone (I'm Deaf) - it's easier for him to hop on my FB and message them. Some of my friends have same hobbies as him, so he posts stuff on my wall, says it's from him. We don't do loveydovey stuff, it's my account and everyone knows it. We don't do the "So and So" joint account thing, it's weird.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Just curious but why does it make people "stabbity" or cringe by seeing folks with joint accounts? Does it affect your life somehow?

    From seeing this for myself via friends....the people that it normally bothers are the people who would have/have had inappropriate conversations with one of the joint-accounter participants...and now they no longer can. Via facebook anyway.
    Put it this way -- you and I "know" each other only online. We have never even met in person and our SOs don't know us, much less each other. How weird would it be for them if random Internet friends were posting all over their pages when they have nothing in common with those people.

    I have my friends' SOs on my page -- the ones I know or have interacted with in some way, at least. And I have my interests and C has his. He is obsessed with airplanes. If we had a joint account, I'd have a page full of airplane stuff. I don't care about airplanes.

    I'm not hiding anything, I'm not interested in anyone else's SO and I'm not conversing in inappropriate ways with other men. I don't care if C sees my account, but adding his name would be odd. And it does seem like co-dependence, that you can't even have your own space on a free Internet site.
  • traceywoody
    traceywoody Posts: 233 Member
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    I've always thought it was odd and am very curious to hear from people who do this.

    My husband and I have one Facebook account. We only use it to keep up to date with family goings on and photos. It is not our source of social contact. We have separate emails etc, We are also a little older and are not so caught up in the "Facebook" thing. I have no desire to add "friends" for the sake of it. I will actually call or text my friends and see them face to face. :smile:

    ETA We have been married for nearly 29 years.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,741 Member
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    My daughter and her husband do this as well as one of my older friends who just got married last year.. Both of them are married to cheaters so I am sure it has something to do with that.. plus both females do most of the posting.. when the guys get on and say: "I love my wife"...I'm pretty sure it's the females posting those comments.

    I have those friends, too. My husband's cousin is always talking about how awesome his wife is on Facebook, but according to him, he hasn't been on Facebook in two years. The only reason it's still active is so his wife can log on and send herself game requests, so it became pretty obvious what was happening, lol.

    I have a friend with the worst wife ever. Seriously, she sucks. She doesn't work, she doesn't clean, she doesn't cook, she wont open the door for a delivery person, she doesn't drive, she doesn't let him go anywhere without her, she'll divorce him if he smokes, she growls and hisses at him regularly (I'm not even kidding - like he'll reach for something on her plate and she will straight up growl at him), if he buys himself something, he has to buy her something of equal or greater value or she throws a fit...I could go on.

    About once every two months, there's a post on his Facebook page that says "I have the BEST wife ever", or "Winner of the Best Wife of the Year Award goes to My Wife!!". Either he's delusional or she's posting for him. I'm waiting for the day she mixes it up and posts it as her own status. That would be awesomely hilarious.

    LOL he probably does post it...the one time in 2 months he gets laid.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I've always thought it was odd and am very curious to hear from people who do this.

    My husband and I have one Facebook account. We only use it to keep up to date with family goings on and photos. It is not our source of social contact. We have separate emails etc, We are also a little older and are not so caught up in the "Facebook" thing. I have no desire to add "friends" for the sake of it. I will actually call or text my friends and see them face to face. :smile:

    ETA We have been married for nearly 29 years.
    What is this assumption that people who use Facebook don't contact their friends and family using any other method? Or that FB users don't leave the house?

    I have a very active social life. I call and text (though texting is no more personal than a FB message, so ...). I also have moved three times in my adult life and my friends have moved to various places and my family is scattered all over the place. Facebook is a quick, easy method for quickly conveying information to a large group of people who have an interest. It also is an easy way to plan events and track RSVPs in one spot. It isn't a replacement for personal interaction; it's an enhancement.
  • greengoddess0123
    greengoddess0123 Posts: 417 Member
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    I've heard it's a thing certain conservative Christians do (I wouldn't know, as I'm neither conservative nor Christian, and my husband and I have separate FB accounts). It's either to protect the woman against impropriety (pervy PMs), or as a symbolic gesture, you know, the whole "a man cleaves unto his wife and they become one flesh" kind of thing.

    my parents are conservative christians they have their own separate accounts.

    "protecting a woman" is just code for jealousy, control and manipulation.

    I'm throwing a big fat BULLCHIT flag.
    Note that she said CERTAIN conservative christians.

    I'm having source amnesia -- I can't remember where I read this. An article someone posted on Facebook, I think, but now I can't find it. I just remember thinking, "Oh that makes sense," because my FB friends who do this are Christian (and very conservative). I didn't mean to imply that all conservatives and/or Christians do this, or that this is the only reason people would do it. The cheating spouses reason makes sense, too. Doesn't sound like a healthy relationship to me, but it makes sense as a reason.

    Hmm, maybe I should message my joint FB friends and get the answer right from the horse's mouth. :smile:
  • traceywoody
    traceywoody Posts: 233 Member
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    I've always thought it was odd and am very curious to hear from people who do this.

    My husband and I have one Facebook account. We only use it to keep up to date with family goings on and photos. It is not our source of social contact. We have separate emails etc, We are also a little older and are not so caught up in the "Facebook" thing. I have no desire to add "friends" for the sake of it. I will actually call or text my friends and see them face to face. :smile:

    ETA We have been married for nearly 29 years.
    What is this assumption that people who use Facebook don't contact their friends and family using any other method? Or that FB users don't leave the house?

    I have a very active social life. I call and text (though texting is no more personal than a FB message, so ...). I also have moved three times in my adult life and my friends have moved to various places and my family is scattered all over the place. Facebook is a quick, easy method for quickly conveying information to a large group of people who have an interest. It also is an easy way to plan events and track RSVPs in one spot. It isn't a replacement for personal interaction; it's an enhancement.

    I am not making assumptions about anyone, just relaying the way we use Facebook. I don't use it as my social source. You might. More power to ya.
  • lisalsd1
    lisalsd1 Posts: 1,520 Member
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    I don't understand the joint account thing...maybe it's convenience? Maybe one person would never check one, so the other person adds both sets of friends to check messages?

    I do have all of my husband's passwords to all of his accounts. That is for convenience. I do all of the banking/bills, so I have to get into his account and move money/pay bills. Sometimes, he calls me from work to check his personal email for something specific, b/c he can't check it from work.
  • paperpudding
    paperpudding Posts: 9,066 Member
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    I'm not on Facebook.
    I don't want to be on Facebook.

    My husband is on Facebook, he goes on it a few times a week and I occasionally look at photos etc that people have posted on his. I have very occasionally posted something to somebody in response to something on his page - to avoid confusion, I will start with Paperpudding posting here blah blah.

    We have joint email account - none of our emails are confidential or personal information, any that I dont want to read, I just skip over and vice versa.

    I have been married for 28 years.
    There has been no cheating. There are no trust issues or traps going on.

    Sorry if this makes people cringe or go stabby - but I guess that is their problem. What we are doing works for us. Perhaps we are just weird - too bad. :smile:
  • DaughterOfTheMostHighKing
    DaughterOfTheMostHighKing Posts: 1,436 Member
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    I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
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    I like it. I am single but have been cheated on by guys chatting with exes on facebook. Id prefer it or perhaps prefer being with a trustworthy decent guy. Oh and I have been hit up on facebook by married men a lot too. Soo yea..id do it.

    wanna start a facebook account together *wink wink nudge nudge*
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
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    This is why I don't want to get married anytime soon

    This and potentially being called "hubby"


    Brb going to throw up

    Ugh I hate the term hubby. And prego.

    I'd never have a joint Facebook account with my boyfriend. Its weird.

    what kind of spaghetti sauce do you get at the store then?
  • chrissyrenee1029
    chrissyrenee1029 Posts: 358 Member
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    I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.

    My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
  • vismundcygnus27
    vismundcygnus27 Posts: 98 Member
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    People do this? I've actually never seen a joint account like that. Although I guess I also have very few married friends (being 23). The concept kind of baffles me. I quite like having my own separate identity, both online and offline. Being open and honest with each other is one thing, but you still need to have some degree of privacy.
  • paperpudding
    paperpudding Posts: 9,066 Member
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    I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.

    My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.

    Yep, that works for you - that's great!

    People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
    My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
  • paperpudding
    paperpudding Posts: 9,066 Member
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    People do this? I've actually never seen a joint account like that. Although I guess I also have very few married friends (being 23). The concept kind of baffles me. I quite like having my own separate identity, both online and offline. Being open and honest with each other is one thing, but you still need to have some degree of privacy.

    As has been pointed out many times upthread- it depends what you are using your account for - if all you do is post and look at photos of holidays and family snaps and nothing actually private - then the privacy issue is not an issue.
  • vismundcygnus27
    vismundcygnus27 Posts: 98 Member
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    People do this? I've actually never seen a joint account like that. Although I guess I also have very few married friends (being 23). The concept kind of baffles me. I quite like having my own separate identity, both online and offline. Being open and honest with each other is one thing, but you still need to have some degree of privacy.

    As has been pointed out many times upthread- it depends what you are using your account for - if all you do is post and look at photos of holidays and family snaps and nothing actually private - then the privacy issue is not an issue.

    That's very true. Since I use FB as a means of direct communication with friends and family, giving my SO access to my FB account would be akin to handing him a record of every text I've sent in the past 5 years. But if everything you do on there is public, then it's not really a problem. I honestly just didn't know joint accounts were a thing prior to seeing this thread...
  • DBoone85
    DBoone85 Posts: 916 Member
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    I've heard it's a thing certain conservative Christians do (I wouldn't know, as I'm neither conservative nor Christian, and my husband and I have separate FB accounts). It's either to protect the woman against impropriety (pervy PMs), or as a symbolic gesture, you know, the whole "a man cleaves unto his wife and they become one flesh" kind of thing.

    NO. Conservative Christians do not have facebook. Its a sin. Read II Clementines 4:14...its all right there.
  • sixout
    sixout Posts: 3,128 Member
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    I've heard it's a thing certain conservative Christians do (I wouldn't know, as I'm neither conservative nor Christian, and my husband and I have separate FB accounts). It's either to protect the woman against impropriety (pervy PMs), or as a symbolic gesture, you know, the whole "a man cleaves unto his wife and they become one flesh" kind of thing.

    NO. Conservative Christians do not have facebook. Its a sin. Read II Clementines 4:14...its all right there.

    When are we joining our fb accounts?

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