IRL vs. Internet relationships

My MFP friends are 100x better then my IRL real life friends.


& that's no *kitten*

TRUE STORY!

Yep. They don't smell, burp, fart or have any weird ticks either. At least none that I have to see. That, and I don't have to wear gloves when they want to touch . . . icky

LOL gloves!

My MFP friends are 100x better then my IRL real life friends.


& that's no *kitten*

i would say i agree but i don't really have either my so call best friends aren't best friends and my other friends i see once a blue moon only friends i really have are college friends but we only see each other in college and never meet up outside of college
I do have my Mr who happens to be my best mate 2!

Not going to happen everyone on the Internet is Crazy.

and mean

Let's ask Te'o

Giggle.

It may be me personally (in fact, it probably is!) but I find it hard to find people I 'click' with in general, let alone being confined to those I might only meet in person. The internet gave me the chance to meet like-minded people I probably wouldn't have met because they didn't live close to me.

My dad always gives me grief because I ended up with a man who lived in another state. It's not like I didn't date guys in my state, I had a relatively active social life, but no one made quite the impression my guy did. And I was still dating when he and I met the once, then started talking online. And he still stood out head and shoulders over anyone else, so I'm rather grateful we were able to get to know each other online before we got together IRL.

Friendships are different from romantic relationships in this context. I am good friends with people from high school/college who I haven't seen in years. That's not hugely different than being friends with someone I met online who lives a thousand miles away. For me, a friend is a person who cares about me and whom I can count on to be there for me for the important stuff. That doesn't necessitate living 5 minutes away.

But romantic relationships ... I just don't see how you can have a serious, adult relationship with someone you've never met. As I said before, even long-distance relationships where people do see each other as often as they can will not last indefinitely. Unlike a friend, a romantic partner is someone who needs to be physically present in your life on a regular basis if the relationship is going to grow and succeed.

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"Internet relationships" as in you've never met the person in real life? Yeah, that's not real. I can see meeting someone on a dating site or elsewhere online and existing in that period between the first e-mail and your actual face-to-face meeting, but that needs to be a very short period. I don't care if you live on the other side of the world. A meeting needs to occur within 30 days or you need to move on. There is way too much risk involved in becoming emotionally invested in a person you've never actually met.

That doesn't mean real life relationships are necessarily better. I know married couples who are more like roommates than anything else. But I think if you are smart, you won't consider yourself to be "in a relationship" with a person you only know via phone, email, Skype, etc.

And I agree on the long-distance thing. There is always an expiration date ... either one person moves to be with the other, thus ending the "long-distance" aspect, or you decide to go your separate ways, thus ending the whole relationship. You cannot have a long-distance relationship indefinitely because it's the kind of thing that doesn't get easier; it gets harder, every single time you say goodbye to each other, knowing it will be weeks or even months before you see each other again.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

^^this.

There is a *lot* you can tell about a person IRL that you can't get online (yes, even through Skype conversations). IDK...you just get "vibes" off someone IRL that you can't get online...also...HUGS...

Once, I was chatting with a woman that I met through a website we both participated on, and we "clicked" online in friendship and began emailing regularly. Turned out we lived only about an hour away from each other, which was a huge coincidence as the site had people on it from around the world. After a while I suggested we meet in person but she backed away and was against it. I think after that something began to change, as there was a level that she couldn't get past and I was much more open. We eventually stopped communicating.

Its too easy to pretend to be something you are not online. Maybe she was afraid of what you would think of the real her? I met my husband online through a mutual friend, but we had to meet in person. I never lied about anything about myself. Brutally honest and up to date pictures of myself, and I was still afraid that when we met in person, he'd take one look at me and say, "Nope. Sorry.", and leave.

Each should be enjoyed on their own merits, not in comparison to each other.

Apples and oranges are fruit. I like them both. But they are different. I don't expect my orange to be an apple.

Yeah I don't view someone I chat with on the internet as a "real relationship". Sorry. You don't have any real interaction... a transcript on the computer has a number of problems. People tend to be different when the anonymity of the computer is involved. People don't fear embarrassment or rejection as much (more flirting, more fighting, etc) so they are more bold. You have the chance to revise and think about your responses instead of the immediacy of a real conversation. There is a lot to be taken into account with how someone says something, body language, etc that is missed and leads to a misunderstanding of people. This is even for a person that trying to be themselves, setting aside people trying to deceive you on purpose.

Because people over share online, it leads to a false sense of closeness. Add someone on Facebook, and if you share a lot yourself, now this person can know facts about you that would have taken months or years to uncover through conversation and hanging out. It's the Cliff Notes of friendship... you get highlights without having to work any or invest any thought in getting to know someone. You think you "know" the person, when you just know this persona they have put out on the internet.

I know I'm probably in the minority, and that is cool, I just don't see it as the same. I tend to limit my online friends to people I know IRL for this reason. I think you have to actually meet the person and spend time together for it to be a friendship.

People tend to be different when the anonymity of the computer is involved. People don't fear embarrassment or rejection as much (more flirting, more fighting, etc) so they are more bold. You have the chance to revise and think about your responses instead of the immediacy of a real conversation. There is a lot to be taken into account with how someone says something, body language, etc that is missed and leads to a misunderstanding of people. This is even for a person that trying to be themselves, setting aside people trying to deceive you on purpose.

Because people over share online, it leads to a false sense of closeness.

This. A thousand times this. This is EXACTLY what happened in my situation.

Did somebody say cake vodka?