invisible to Visible. How's the attention you're getting?

What attention?

QFT. I think the overwhelming responses will be from a female perspective since they're the ones getting their door beat down constantly. As a man you pretty much need to be in the top 1% as far as looks go to get any kind of random attention. That or appear visibly rich.

This ^^^

Some days I am aware of the difference in how people treat me. Then again, maybe I am imagining things
Two examples

1. Recently I went to renew my auto insurance and the agent dealing with me was exceptionally talkative, flirty, noticed my last name and asked if I was italian, and kept rambling about trips, summer, etc.... I have been in that same agency, and dealt with the same agent nearly a dozen times in the last decade....but I guess she didn't have the time for me when I was overweight!

Of course, it could simply be that I was dressed better, smiling, or she was having a great day....who knows.

2. Walking on the beach, I notice girls in the distance do a double take and take a long glance at me. As I walk by, I can visibly see their necks following my motion.

Again....maybe they are trying to read my baseball cap, or could be thinking "who the hell does this guy think he is?", or ' hey that looks like my dad!'

I suppose what I am trying to say is your perception of reality is everything. When I am feeling good about myself, I think it radiates. When I am not feeling confident, I am usually looking down, and not even paying attention to anyone else, hoping to just go about my business.

Some days I am aware of the difference in how people treat me. Then again, maybe I am imagining things
Two examples

1. Recently I went to renew my auto insurance and the agent dealing with me was exceptionally talkative, flirty, noticed my last name and asked if I was italian, and kept rambling about trips, summer, etc.... I have been in that same agency, and dealt with the same agent nearly a dozen times in the last decade....but I guess she didn't have the time for me when I was overweight.

You are not imagining it. I get the same thing at the grocery store. The same people
who 8 months ago pretended I didn't exist now won't shut up. I honestly don't think they
realize I'm the same person. I did change my hair so maybe that's it.

I've lost 85# and my breasts are still as big as they were.
Before, I was just huge everywhere so my breasts didn't look proportionate. Now, they look huge compared to
my smaller size. Let's just say my husband is very pleased with my new-looking body. Can't wait to get
bigger ones myself.

Do you mean your breasts DID look proportionate with a larger body? Because that's kind of how I feel. My cup size hasn't changed after losing 134 lb and my band size has gone way down...so now I have to be very careful when shopping for clothing unless I want my bra showing, cleavage for days, etc. A lot of dresses in my current size just are not cut for very large chests and that's something I never considered in the past. It is a whole new set of issues, not that I'm complaining...but it's odd. I think a few dresses and tops I own have people staring at my large chest and that really wasn't something I experienced before because I think DD on a size 10/12 neatly fitted dress is a lot more noticeable than DD in a flouncy 3X top. It is not a real "problem" to me, I don't have any sort of back pain or other issues and I don't think my chest is unusually huge at all but yeah...new issue to deal with when shopping, for sure.

I have the same problem and, I've had to buy tops and dresses that fit me in the chest, but baggy everywhere else. I found a great seamstress who just makes the alterations that I need on my new clothes.

I have always noticed men staring when they didn't think I was looking, and a few who kept on staring even if I made eye contact. I always wondered why they bothered...what are they looking at and what are they thinking? I always feel self conscious when I see it and assume its a judgy stare, with them mentally condemning me and my gluttonous ways. I know that they probably were not thinking anything of the sort, at least not all of them. I had one blatantly hit on me, so not all the stares are stares of disgust.

Now, that I am smaller, (but still fat), I still feel the same awkward way about those looks. I wonder when I am smaller, will I stop assuming that they are looking with disgust, and think they like what the see? Or will I continue to see myself as the fat chick who grosses people out?

I also feel like I've gone from conspicuous to inconspicuous in most settings. People no longer scowl at me, or refuse to sit near me in public places (as if obesity is contagious).

I also do get better customer service in stores, particularly from men.

Question: invisible to Visible. How's the attention you're getting?

Answer: All coming from men about my dad's age, with unfortunate political leanings typical for that age group in the south. In other words, losing weight is so far not doing my love life a bit of good.

Actually, in my case, I feel I have gone from visible to invisible. As a 419 pound fat man, people visibly reacted with disgust whenever I walked into a room.

Now I've lost weight, I am passed over as a "normal" person. I am invisible, in the background. Nobody reacts to me at all.

IT'S GREAT!

FTW

I totally agree with FTW.

I've gone from visible to invisible, I used to get abuse from kids in the street and people would look down at me when I was 321lb - nowadays I walk in the room and I don't even get a raised eyebrow, kids no longer shout abuse at me when I walk down the road, the only attention I get is the odd vehicle horn when walking, usually I'm wearing leggings and a Tshirt, listening to my headphones so I hardly notice it - but I do sometimes wave out to the driver lol

It's great, I love being "normal" I love being largely ignored, I love not getting noticed and yes I do get better service than I did when I was 321lb.... Also when I order food, I no longer get disgusted looks, which is great, I no longer have to feel guilty for eating in public..... IT'S FANTASTIC

xXx

I agree with most all of the above but when it comes to ordering food, I now feel the opposite kind of judgment sometimes. The other night I took my mom out to a chain steakhouse and could feel the server totally mental eye-rolling me when I ordered double broccoli as my side item(s) for example. I live in an area where obesity and mass consumption of BBQ, fried food, etc, is looked upon as normal and I actually feel more judgment now when it comes to some of this stuff...kind of like I am being a poor sport by ordering something healthier. I think it has gotten a lot worse as I approach a healthy weight, because when I was at the beginning of my 134 lb loss people would give me a pity smile or even say "Ooooh you're being good!" and they seemed genuinely positive. Now I guess I'm becoming "normal" so it's annoying or obnoxious to get stuff from the light menu?!

No matter what I weigh I'm always invisible.

I think maybe my experience is strange, but what I've noticed is that while at almost 250 lbs I was kind of imposing (even at 5'4"), I am far less so at 199ish. Which means that people tend to feel far more comfortable getting all up in my space on public transit. I actually hate this. But! Happy about other things.

Well I get more attention too now - even after a moderate 20 pound loss only.
:-)

Good for the most part, except when I don't want to be noticed.

I think maybe my experience is strange, but what I've noticed is that while at almost 250 lbs I was kind of imposing (even at 5'4"), I am far less so at 199ish. Which means that people tend to feel far more comfortable getting all up in my space on public transit. I actually hate this. But! Happy about other things.

Same experience here...I spoke about it a little earlier in the thread. I was so used to kind of "claiming space" with my body and now I feel like I can't. It's so weird! I still feel "big" as a person in general, I am 5'8" 173 lb with long limbs but I feel like I can't save a seat next to me anymore or claim a circle of space in line at the post office...the person behind me will now stand like 10 inches from me instead of 2 feet away. People randomly touch me or get close to me too - not scary creepers, but say, the female clerk in a store where I'm shopping - and I am not used to that either.

Good advice.

I get a lot more looks and to be honest it makes me uncomfortable. I also feel more of a need to make myself look my best...but that is a me issue and has nothing to do with anyone else.

I think maybe my experience is strange, but what I've noticed is that while at almost 250 lbs I was kind of imposing (even at 5'4"), I am far less so at 199ish. Which means that people tend to feel far more comfortable getting all up in my space on public transit. I actually hate this. But! Happy about other things.

Same experience here...I spoke about it a little earlier in the thread. I was so used to kind of "claiming space" with my body and now I feel like I can't. It's so weird! I still feel "big" as a person in general, I am 5'8" 173 lb with long limbs but I feel like I can't save a seat next to me anymore or claim a circle of space in line at the post office...the person behind me will now stand like 10 inches from me instead of 2 feet away. People randomly touch me or get close to me too - not scary creepers, but say, the female clerk in a store where I'm shopping - and I am not used to that either.

I've noticed that lately too. There was a guy in line behind me at the coffee shop last week, and he just wouldn't back up, until I turned sideways and smiled at him. Then I think he got that he was totally in my personal space bubble.