invisible to Visible. How's the attention you're getting?

pusheen12 · August 2014

I have noticed people respond more favorable to me now in general...men and women.

Miss_1999 · August 2014

I'm probably going to have the most bizarre answer. It makes me extremely angry. Even at 400lbs, I was a very confident person. Granted, when I was that heavy, I didn't *see* myself as that heavy. I always fixed myself up nicely, no matter what size I was-- I wore clothes that were fashionable and flattering for my body size, always tried to have my hair fixed nicely, and did my makeup. Since I've lost weight, I get ungodly amounts of messages from people (mostly men) I went to high school with, telling me how I grew up to be so beautiful, or how I look so good since the last time they saw me, blah, blah, blah. I know I *should* take that as a compliment, but I can't help but think they're nothing but shallow SOB's. That I've always been beautiful (yeah, that's quite vain of me), but it's not all about looks and/or size. I didn't just "grow up to be beautiful"- AKA: you've lost weight, I either always was beautiful, or I never was, it didn't just *happen*.

Being the good southerner I am, I always thank them for their kind compliments, then usually do my best to avoid friend request or don't speak to them any more.

I probably am a horrible human being for this one, but for people who didn't seem to know you were alive, or give you the time of day, to all of a sudden be coming out of the woodworks, it's really annoying for me. Strangers, I don't mind so much, but people I *in a knew* it REALLY irks me.

TheTruthAtAnyCost · August 2014

I'm not in a comfortable place yet, but for the first time about a month and a half ago a random, SOBER man came up to me on the street and said he just wanted to let me know how beautiful I was and asked me for my number.

tony56pr · August 2014

No difference. In fairness I'm not looking for attention so I might not pick up on it. I'm in a committed relationship so I'm likely shut off from it. Lot people don't recognize me so that feels good.

MKEgal · August 2014

I started getting a lot more attention after I put back on 2.5 pounds of silicone

I feel the same but I've not had my breasts done yet. I've lost 85# and my breasts are still as big as they were.
Before, I was just huge everywhere so my breasts didn't look proportionate. Now, they look huge compared to
my smaller size. Let's just say my husband is very pleased with my new-looking body. Can't wait to get
bigger ones myself.

Oh. man... I was hoping that mine would get smaller!

So I'm stuck being huge?
I've lost inches in my torso, gone down a few band sizes, but apparently was wearing the wrong cup size all along (can't usually find bigger than a DDD in a department store).

Finding pretty clothes in my size was difficult. Its like manufacturers go, "Hmmmm, size 20, they must just want to wear black in order to hide. Don't be silly, size 20 doesn't need shape...round is their shape".

I noticed this last night, shopping for swimsuits.
The smaller sizes all had models. The plus sizes were drawings.

There was a guy in line behind me at the coffee shop last week, and he just wouldn't back up, until I turned sideways and smiled at him. Then I think he got that he was totally in my personal space bubble.

There are some people who just like to be too close.
I had one on a bus in Italy, followed me through the crowd all the way up by the driver, pressing against my butt.
I finally turned around & growled at him, "move it or lose it!" and either he understood English or my tone & finally left me alone.

about a month and a half ago a random, SOBER man came up to me on the street and said he just wanted to let me know how beautiful I was and asked me for my number.

WOW! Oh, that must have been a great ego boost.
So did you give it to him?
Was he attractive?

I'm looking forward to surprising someone I haven't seen in over a year now, and might not see for another year, but by then I should be at my goal weight (more than 100 lb down from when he last saw me).

mdegges · August 2014

This is an awesome thread! I always felt I stood out because of my weight, and it made me want to hide and blend into the background. I think most of this was (and is) just self-inflicted judgement. I would always think the worst when walking along busy streets, or huffing at the top of stairs. I would always try to take short-cuts to avoid people to get where I needed to go, or leave much earlier than I needed to in order to walk slower and have the chance sop up sweat before arriving at work/school. It's funny, I still have a lot of weight-related hangups, but they're just not as big of a deal anymore. I still sweat all the time. I still breathe heavily. I still have a hard time being in social situations. I still don't like walking on main roads or wearing "notice me!" clothing. But these things no longer prevent me from getting out and doing what I need to. I'm hoping that as I get closer to my GW, I will be even more accepting of myself and no longer self-defined by my weight.

nomorefatjuu · August 2014

I have to disagree, It's not about atittude and confidence, let's be honest the world is about appereance, there are researches telling that people are nicer with prettier girls and pretty and our culture is not being fat.

115s · August 2014

That whole "love at first sight" thing happened to me...

zombie130 · August 2014

What attention?

QFT. I think the overwhelming responses will be from a female perspective since they're the ones getting their door beat down constantly. As a man you pretty much need to be in the top 1% as far as looks go to get any kind of random attention. That or appear visibly rich.

ummm haha and with an attitude like that you expect attention from people? that's not fun to be around. js. o.O

anyway just skimming through a lot of these i just want to say it is kind of sad that people holding doors and saying hi has to mean someone notices you more just because weight has been lost. can it not be seen as people just being nice and not having anything to do with attractiveness or weight? it saddens me that more people cant just hold doors and say hi on a regular basis just to be nice because they can and should be nice. there are a lot of people in this world. people just need to not judge no matter what and be nice. im not trying to be rude or anything im just pointing that out:p i like holding doors for people and greeting them with a smile. you never know the battles they may be facing and a smile from a kind stranger could potentially make them feel better even for a split second.

BekaBooluvsu · August 2014

I've lost 85# and my breasts are still as big as they were.
Before, I was just huge everywhere so my breasts didn't look proportionate. Now, they look huge compared to
my smaller size. Let's just say my husband is very pleased with my new-looking body. Can't wait to get
bigger ones myself.

Do you mean your breasts DID look proportionate with a larger body? Because that's kind of how I feel. My cup size hasn't changed after losing 134 lb and my band size has gone way down...so now I have to be very careful when shopping for clothing unless I want my bra showing, cleavage for days, etc. A lot of dresses in my current size just are not cut for very large chests and that's something I never considered in the past. It is a whole new set of issues, not that I'm complaining...but it's odd. I think a few dresses and tops I own have people staring at my large chest and that really wasn't something I experienced before because I think DD on a size 10/12 neatly fitted dress is a lot more noticeable than DD in a flouncy 3X top. It is not a real "problem" to me, I don't have any sort of back pain or other issues and I don't think my chest is unusually huge at all but yeah...new issue to deal with when shopping, for sure.

Nope, not what I meant. I was a 50A before. My cup size has NOT decreased with my weight loss. My current bra size is 42DD. I like it alot. I can see what you meant about shirts and bras and such. I'm pear shaped so I wear a large shirt around my bust but have to get extra large because my waist is bigger. I am definitely experiencing more problems than I anticipated. Not complaining either but it sure would be nice if they made some clothes designated to women with curves.

TheTruthAtAnyCost · September 2014

about a month and a half ago a random, SOBER man came up to me on the street and said he just wanted to let me know how beautiful I was and asked me for my number.

WOW! Oh, that must have been a great ego boost.
So did you give it to him?
Was he attractive?

Yeah it felt really awesome. I didn't give it to him, because at the time I was engaged...which is no longer the case. But yes, he was very attractive.

invisible to Visible. How's the attention you're getting?

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