Just need to vent

Thank you to those of you who had helpful things to say. I really just needed to express it. I lost 90+ pounds with WW about 12 years ago, and gained it back plus some. I guess that is when my mind set changed. After being so successful for so long, I got so discouraged that my whole mind set changed. I have a hard time believing that I can lose weight and keep it off forever. I know that I need to change my mindset, but I don't know how that will happen.

To those of you are are super negative and non-supportive--I guess I now know why I stopped going in the forums. Jeesh. If you can't say something helpful or polite, maybe you should just keep your mouth shut. Just saying.

I've lost weight and put it back on before too. I imagine a lot of the folks on here have. It's great to know you've done it before so you can certainly do it again. 'grats! Once your mindset does change I hope that you would follow the advice given here. It was good advice. No one was "negative" or "non-supportive." You wanted to vent and were looking for advice. It was offered. Maybe not the advice you wanted but that doesn't make it negative or non-supportive. I for one was speaking from personal experience: when I don't lose weight it's because I'm overeating. End of story. How do I know I'm overeating? I count calories. Does it suck? Yup. For me though, necessary.

I'm not so fat that I am going to die anytime soon, but thanks for that assumption I guess. My cholesterol, triglycerides, sugar, etc are all extremely healthy.

I feel so fat and yucky, and I don't even feel like I want to continue anymore.

OP, you need help beyond that available on an internet forum.

And you seem like a nice person. I don't want to count calories because there is so much more to being healthy than how many calories you eat. Haven't you learned- if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. Guess I will stay away from forums to avoid tools like you.

Wow. Stay classy OP name calling people who are actually trying to help you? Really? No one has said anything mean to you. No one has said anything mean at all.

ETA: If you didn't want constructive responses from people trying to help you then maybe next time make this a blog post.

I guess I have a different idea of what nice and mean are. I think that some of the comments were unhelpful and unnecessary, and just mean. Some people just said it how it was, that is not who I was addressing that to. I was trying to direct that to a particular post, but didn't do the quote thing right.
.

Can you help us understand better by telling us which comments you felt were mean?

So, I haven't posted in any forum in years. But I just have to vent today. I lost about 40 pounds over the course of 2 years using mfp. I got pregnant and gained about 30 back (which was kind of necessary ). My son is 15 months old, and I weigh as much as I did when he was born. Lately, we have been eating less and eating healthier, but there has been no change in the scale or how I look. This summer, I took up running.....no change. How can one run 3 times a week and not see a change??? So, I quit.

I feel so fat and yucky, and I don't even feel like I want to continue anymore. It's like nothing changes. I don't want to count calories, because we have been trying to eat better foods, which means no low fat junk filled with bad things. I don't do low fat, so I eat less. I just needed to express this in writing. If running doesn't make a difference, why even bother.

Ok, help me out with this – you lost 40 lbs in 2 years using MFP…but now you don’t want to bother with something that has proven successful (counting calories) because….????? If you just want to wing it and guess how many calories and macros you are eating, you get the type of results that you should expect from not having a logical methodology for nutrition (“eat better foods” and “I don’t do low fat, so I eat less” aren't objective, measurable goals that are likely to benefit someone that wants to lose as much weight as you do)

Running is an activity that benefits your cardiovascular system, and as a bonus, burns calories and can therefore assist in losing weight. Running isn't a license to ignore nutrition.

I get the logging things, I really do. However, I ate a ton of low fat food to keep the calories low. I now know that low fat food is full of horrible crap. I want to avoid falling into the trap of low fat chemicals. It is disgusting what they have to do with food to make it low fat.

Low in fat DOES NOT always mean low in calories! Perhaps you need to visit a dietician and have them discuss a healthy diet plan with you.

Have you considered consulting with a nutrionist or being seen by a doctor?

Since this is generally a math equation, there may be a body chemistry component going on that you may not otherwise be aware of.

what about your children? What do they have to say........... You just had some children and then you only think about yourself? You bring children into this world and you don't even think about their welfare, their future.........you are young, but if you keep going the way you are, you wont be here long because of diabetes, high blood pressure, heart attack, stroke..........

I am slightly offended that someone who actually imply that I don't care about my son. I am not just thinking of myself. If that was the case, I would be shoving myself full of nasty food all day long, and not exercising at all. One of the things I said in the start of this thread was that I am eating healthy and running, but not losing weight...and that I was finding that frustrating. I did not say that I was a lazy blob who did nothing but snack all day.

Ok, I can understand your frustration with this post. Just chalk it up to someone commenting without reading and comprehending what you actually said. It's not really personal, even though it feels like it. I'm sure that no one here really thinks you don't care about your son.

To lose weight you have to eat at a deficit.

To eat at a deficit you have to know how much you are eating.

To know how much you are eating you have to weigh and measure everything you eat.

The first sentence is true, the second and third are not. You need a deficit for fat loss. That is ALL you need. How is personal preference.

I stand by all 3...2 is most definitely true because if you don't know how much you are eating then how would you know you're at a deficit?

Again, because you are losing weight. I am not measuring or logging my food. I am losing weight, therefore, I know I am in a deficit. I have no idea how many calories I consume in a day, nor do I care because I know it's less than I burn. How do I know?

Again, because I am losing weight.

and the OP isn't.
so again, your advice/approach isn't valid.

it doesn't matter how much or how hard you argue it.

I did not advise the OP not to log her food. I corrected an incorrect post.

If you aren't advising the OP then you are thread hijacking.

And it wasn't incorrect. No matter how much you argue it. Maybe that's what works for some, but for someone who has no idea what they are eating, thinks they have cut back but are not losing then I think getting an idea of what they are actually eating would be very useful information to have.

That is pretty much what I've been saying. It's a useful tool for some. It could (not would) help.

That, however, is not what you said. It's right above if you want to re-read what you posted. You said "have to". That's incorrect.

no it isn't. in order to determine a deficit. you have to use math. not "well, I guess I'm losing so I must be at a deficit".

I know, it's a lot to admit that you're wrong, but just chalk it up and move on.

To lose weight you have to eat at a deficit.

To eat at a deficit you have to know how much you are eating.

To know how much you are eating you have to weigh and measure everything you eat.

The first sentence is true, the second and third are not. You need a deficit for fat loss. That is ALL you need. How is personal preference.

I stand by all 3...2 is most definitely true because if you don't know how much you are eating then how would you know you're at a deficit?

Again, because you are losing weight. I am not measuring or logging my food. I am losing weight, therefore, I know I am in a deficit. I have no idea how many calories I consume in a day, nor do I care because I know it's less than I burn. How do I know?

Again, because I am losing weight.

and the OP isn't.
so again, your advice/approach isn't valid.

it doesn't matter how much or how hard you argue it.

I did not advise the OP not to log her food. I corrected an incorrect post.

If you aren't advising the OP then you are thread hijacking.

And it wasn't incorrect. No matter how much you argue it. Maybe that's what works for some, but for someone who has no idea what they are eating, thinks they have cut back but are not losing then I think getting an idea of what they are actually eating would be very useful information to have.

That is pretty much what I've been saying. It's a useful tool for some. It could (not would) help.

That, however, is not what you said. It's right above if you want to re-read what you posted. You said "have to". That's incorrect.

no it isn't. in order to determine a deficit. you have to use math. not "well, I guess I'm losing so I must be at a deficit".

I know, it's a lot to admit that you're wrong, but just chalk it up and move on.

Yeah, geez, apparently it is hard to admit. So, riddle me this Batman, how am I losing weight without knowing how much I am eating? Magic?

burning plenty of calories arguing moot points by threadjacking instead of moving on.

make sure you log it.

To lose weight you have to eat at a deficit.

To eat at a deficit you have to know how much you are eating.

To know how much you are eating you have to weigh and measure everything you eat.

The first sentence is true, the second and third are not. You need a deficit for fat loss. That is ALL you need. How is personal preference.

I stand by all 3...2 is most definitely true because if you don't know how much you are eating then how would you know you're at a deficit?

Again, because you are losing weight. I am not measuring or logging my food. I am losing weight, therefore, I know I am in a deficit. I have no idea how many calories I consume in a day, nor do I care because I know it's less than I burn. How do I know?

Again, because I am losing weight.

and the OP isn't.
so again, your advice/approach isn't valid.

it doesn't matter how much or how hard you argue it.

I did not advise the OP not to log her food. I corrected an incorrect post.

If you aren't advising the OP then you are thread hijacking.

And it wasn't incorrect. No matter how much you argue it. Maybe that's what works for some, but for someone who has no idea what they are eating, thinks they have cut back but are not losing then I think getting an idea of what they are actually eating would be very useful information to have.

That is pretty much what I've been saying. It's a useful tool for some. It could (not would) help.

That, however, is not what you said. It's right above if you want to re-read what you posted. You said "have to". That's incorrect.

no it isn't. in order to determine a deficit. you have to use math. not "well, I guess I'm losing so I must be at a deficit".

I know, it's a lot to admit that you're wrong, but just chalk it up and move on.

Yeah, geez, apparently it is hard to admit. So, riddle me this Batman, how am I losing weight without knowing how much I am eating? Magic?

Why do you make every single thread about you?

Trial and error. It works. Not efficient, but it works.

To lose weight you have to eat at a deficit.

To eat at a deficit you have to know how much you are eating.

To know how much you are eating you have to weigh and measure everything you eat.

The first sentence is true, the second and third are not. You need a deficit for fat loss. That is ALL you need. How is personal preference.

I stand by all 3...2 is most definitely true because if you don't know how much you are eating then how would you know you're at a deficit?

Again, because you are losing weight. I am not measuring or logging my food. I am losing weight, therefore, I know I am in a deficit. I have no idea how many calories I consume in a day, nor do I care because I know it's less than I burn. How do I know?

Again, because I am losing weight.

and the OP isn't.
so again, your advice/approach isn't valid.

it doesn't matter how much or how hard you argue it.

I did not advise the OP not to log her food. I corrected an incorrect post.

If you aren't advising the OP then you are thread hijacking.

And it wasn't incorrect. No matter how much you argue it. Maybe that's what works for some, but for someone who has no idea what they are eating, thinks they have cut back but are not losing then I think getting an idea of what they are actually eating would be very useful information to have.

That is pretty much what I've been saying. It's a useful tool for some. It could (not would) help.

That, however, is not what you said. It's right above if you want to re-read what you posted. You said "have to". That's incorrect.

no it isn't. in order to determine a deficit. you have to use math. not "well, I guess I'm losing so I must be at a deficit".

I know, it's a lot to admit that you're wrong, but just chalk it up and move on.

So consistently losing doesn't prove the deficit?

proving a deficit is easy. the threadjacker is losing weight without logging.

OP isn't logging / isn't losing weight.

threadjacker keeps on harping on a helpful post because they disagree with the advice.

To lose weight you have to eat at a deficit.

To eat at a deficit you have to know how much you are eating.

To know how much you are eating you have to weigh and measure everything you eat.

The first sentence is true, the second and third are not. You need a deficit for fat loss. That is ALL you need. How is personal preference.

I stand by all 3...2 is most definitely true because if you don't know how much you are eating then how would you know you're at a deficit?

Again, because you are losing weight. I am not measuring or logging my food. I am losing weight, therefore, I know I am in a deficit. I have no idea how many calories I consume in a day, nor do I care because I know it's less than I burn. How do I know?

Again, because I am losing weight.

and the OP isn't.
so again, your advice/approach isn't valid.

it doesn't matter how much or how hard you argue it.

I did not advise the OP not to log her food. I corrected an incorrect post.

If you aren't advising the OP then you are thread hijacking.

And it wasn't incorrect. No matter how much you argue it. Maybe that's what works for some, but for someone who has no idea what they are eating, thinks they have cut back but are not losing then I think getting an idea of what they are actually eating would be very useful information to have.

That is pretty much what I've been saying. It's a useful tool for some. It could (not would) help.

That, however, is not what you said. It's right above if you want to re-read what you posted. You said "have to". That's incorrect.

*eyeroll* Enough already.

OP, counting calories is not always fun. But it's the simplest way to get you to your goals. When I slack off on counting, I feel my pants getting tighter, and I know it's time to buckle down. I wish I didn't have to, but I do.

Also, did you mention how long you gave yourself to see results? Time and patience are also key here. If you've put in more than a couple months of dedicated logging and running, and STILL haven't seen a difference either in the scale or measurements, it may be time to consult your physician for a more in-depth look. But diligently counting your intake for an extended period of time, while annoying/frustrating/whatever, will be your biggest tool.

deleted my post.

Sorry OP, I should not have let myself be baited like that. My apology. I hope you find the right path for you.

No one baited you. This is what you do in any thread you enter.

OP...I posted a link earlier, there's a lot of good info there. They might even help you find the motivation. Some people also read a lot of the success stories and that motivates them.

Because there have been a lot of posts I'll post that link again

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1455850-new-here-have-questions-this-may-help

To lose weight you have to eat at a deficit.

To eat at a deficit you have to know how much you are eating.

To know how much you are eating you have to weigh and measure everything you eat.

The first sentence is true, the second and third are not. You need a deficit for fat loss. That is ALL you need. How is personal preference.

I stand by all 3...2 is most definitely true because if you don't know how much you are eating then how would you know you're at a deficit?

Again, because you are losing weight. I am not measuring or logging my food. I am losing weight, therefore, I know I am in a deficit. I have no idea how many calories I consume in a day, nor do I care because I know it's less than I burn. How do I know?

Again, because I am losing weight.

I did that once also. However, I did it in an unhealthy manner. I lost too much weight too fast. Then when I got to my low weight I still had a high percentage of body fat and was unhappy with how I looked and wanted to lose even more. I lost lean mass. Then when I started eating "normally" again, I packed the pounds back on. How much you eat does matter. And it isn't until you have logged for awhile that you really can manage maintaining while not logging. Losing lean mass perhaps doesn't matter to some people, but it is another important factor in health. Bone mass as women age, strength, frailty all are important considerations in quality of life as you age.

If you are losing the perfect amount so that you are also not losing too much lean mass, then congratulations, you are perfect, and I fail to see why you would even need to be on a calorie counting website.

deleted my post.

Sorry OP, I should not have let myself be baited like that. My apology. I hope you find the right path for you.

Baited? You hijack every thread you participate in by arguing.

Exactly. Glad I'm not the only one who sees this.

Omg, for a minute there I thought I'd gain a hate for Zelda but it's just an elf avi /sigh of relief.

I can leave this thread happy now.

Pour one out, let it burn