Anyone Else Have an Overweight Chid? Any tips?

My son is 7 and he is 115lbs and a little over 4ft tall. I take full responsibility for his weight. We are all overweight due to our eating habits and lifestyle. About a month ago I decided enough was enough so I have changed the way we all eat. I started cooking more and for the most part have cut out fast food, sweets, chips, candy and what not. He gets a treat once a week. I am working on portion control for him and using MFP for myself. Doctor says to let him grow into the weight but I'm sure it would not hurt him to lose a little. I am hoping that the change in diet will help. I am also looking for ways to get him more active with out making him feel like he is "working out" I guess. We have all been going to the park together. I was just wondering if anyone had any tips or advice or has gone through a similar experience. I don't want my son to be unhealthy and I know he is going to need my guidance. Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!
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Replies

  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    Looks like you've got the right idea...lots of fun active stuff as a family and good food, don't make a big deal of diet or treats because it will become a forbidden delight
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Listen to the doctor. Make sure he's active and teach him the right choices but don't restrict calories, he's still growing and needs the nutrition.
  • SlimMe37
    SlimMe37 Posts: 133 Member
    My kids arent overweight, however, I think you're doing a great job with cooking properly and limiting junk. I would like to say, don't verbally make a big deal about his weight. Kids can be very sensitive. Just keep encouraging better eating habits, and get waking. Do you have a dog? I would be he would love taking it for walks ????.
  • princessofredrock
    princessofredrock Posts: 382 Member
    Sounds like you are doing great! You could see if he wants to do any sports. My boys have been in Tae kwon do since they were 4. They are now 12, 10 and 8! One black belt and 2 red belts that will be testing for their black belts next year!

    I have seen many overweight kids over the years and watched them all blossom into healthy young people with the training and as they grew!

    Keep up the good work!

    :flowerforyou:
  • LabAgility
    LabAgility Posts: 120 Member
    While not overweight, I do have one extremely food motivated kid. He knows fruit and veggies are anytime snacks that he can always have. We always give him a balanced meal with fruit and veggies- he knows that extra servings only happen after his fruit and veggie portions are gone. But- that it is completely ok to leave food uneaten. Also we try to get active as a family as often as possible.

    We talk about only eating when you are hungry and not just when it tastes good. Also, he would be worried that we would eat food before he had a chance to if he waited. Because of that we always leave a portion for him without eating it all ourselves. This way it reinforces that it is ok to wait and eat something later....it will be there.
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    Listen to the doctor. Make sure he's active and teach him the right choices but don't restrict calories, he's still growing and needs the nutrition.

    Exactly. Keep him active, but keep him fed with wholesome foods. You're on the right path!! Be sure to be an example to him as well.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    I don't have have kids, but I can tell you what bugged me as an overweight kid, which might help you decide how to deal with his weight. But, to start off, you are doing the right thing in changing your own eating habits, cooking so that you know what goes into the food, practicing moderation, and setting limits on treats for him (and any other kids you might have?).

    As an adult, I can clearly say that these things really affected my self esteem:

    *Father making comments about how fat I was.
    *Mother telling me I wasn't fat (even though I was 5 ft. and weighed 145 pounds at 12, and then 5 ft 4 in high school and weighed 200 pounds)
    *Waking up in the wee hours and hearing my parents arguing over me being fat.
    *Being told I couldn't eat something when everyone else could, and them eating in front of me talking about how good it was
    *Being told to exercise rather than my parents doing exercise activities with me.

    Please listen to your doctor and do not make his weight the focus, but continue practicing and teaching moderation. He's still growing, so don't put him on a diet either. He just might learn to make those healthier choices for himself as he grows up.
  • bdenitto
    bdenitto Posts: 210 Member
    I think the best thing you can do for kids is to get them moving! Enroll them in a group sport or take a class through your local rec center. My daughter takes a tumbling class and she loves to play in the backyard. My daughter eats the way my husband and I eat; lots of veggies, lean proteins, and the occasional treat. We decided to get healthy shortly after she was born. We realized we were not setting a good example and so we changed out lives before she got old enough to notice. I imagine it is a bit more difficult with an older kid, but don't give up!
  • Zerodette
    Zerodette Posts: 200 Member
    that it is completely ok to leave food uneaten. Also we try to get active as a family as often as possible.

    that it is ok to wait and eat something later....it will be there.

    Neither of these concepts was taught to me when I was younger. Nor was an active lifestyle--Both my parents grew up very poor on farms, so NEVER having to sweat was a privilege. I think these 3 things would make quite the difference for a kid.
  • The leading cause of adult obesity is childhood obesity. Once fat cells are on our bodies, they never go away. They shrink, but they never go away, making it harder for those who lose weight to keep it off. If you can find a way to make the healthier option seem like the more fun option, perhaps that will help. Good luck with your new lifestyle and I hope this helps!
  • pamcris
    pamcris Posts: 47 Member
    It sounds like you are doing great! If you still feel like he needs more help, then enroll him into a sport/activity. If you can't afford it, then you can go with him every weekend to the park and play soccer or some sport that requires a lot of movement for a couple of hours. You could maybe get a basketball hoop outside your house and play with him. The great thing about doing everything as a family is that he'll feel supported and you'll also get some extra calories burned.
  • Maquillage_
    Maquillage_ Posts: 194 Member
    You could use games like Wii Fit, Wii sport or just dance to get him more active. None of them will feel like a workout and in his eyes are just games. If you have a dog, or even if you don't, you could start taking morning of evening walks as a family. During the walks you could have a "race" to certain points to incorporate some running or jogging and it will be run because what child doesn't like to win? You could also see if he would like to join a sport. There are so many I'm sure he'd be interested in one of them.
  • baconslave
    baconslave Posts: 7,018 Member
    I agree with posters who say keep him active. You are modelling good behavior and that goes a long way. Allowing him a treat is good. Keep providing healthy food choices. What has helped my oldest, he is the only overweight one, is to limit his non-water drinks. Soda, juice and milk all add calories that don't fill them up, so they end up overconsuming calories. This will help cut unnecessary calories and leave calories to be governed by appetite as they should be.

    Keep doing this, and he'll likely grow into the weight. As in he will get taller, but his weight will stay the same. That is what mine is doing. He has grown in inches, but his weight has dropped 2lbs since soccer season started.
  • sweedee1218
    sweedee1218 Posts: 98 Member
    Thank you so much everyone!!! I am trying very hard to make the right changes and be a better mom for him!! We never let him know he is overweight but I have heard kids make some comments. We tell him he is handsome and that he is big and strong like his dad. His dad used to try and make him clean his plate but I put a stop to that real quick. I try to start with small portions and if he wants more he can have some after his veggies are all gone. He loves fruit and veggies so that helps. We were a fast food family for a long time then we realized that not only were we all obese but we were broke all the time! Its amazing how much money we have saved but cutting out fast food. I have put that towards my grocery shopping. He loves to swim so I'm going to see if I can find a program at the Y for him. I take him to workout with me at our apartment when his Dad is at work and he asks me why I'm working out and I tell him so I can be healthy and strong. I hope this will stick with him.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    My advice is to listen to that doctor. It's crazy to put a 7yo on a diet. Just serve him healthy foods! He will learn good eating habits if he grows up that way and will be less likely to end up overweight as an adult.

    As he grows, the fat will just disappear.

    Encourage activity by having him play outside and signing him up for sports he'd like to play, but don't force it. Go for walks together.

    And don't give this kid a weight complex. You don't have to talk to him about it at all. If he's fat, I promise you that other kids are already doing that. It isn't what he needs from you.

    Just have him eat right. :)
  • pleasepleaseno
    pleasepleaseno Posts: 166 Member
    Hmm. I was overweight as a kid, and my mom enrolled in me soccer. I felt kind of awkward at first (of course I was aware of my weight...I was an 11 year old girl) but I eventually got over it and began to love the sport. My mother also always had TONS of fresh fruit around. She also went on a weight loss thing herself which just sort of meant the whole family oriented toward better food.
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    My kids are not overweight - my eldest is 5, not far off 4 feet tall and 44lbs.

    I'd say the best thing to do is keep active. We walk pretty much everywhere, and tend to take the kids out on their scooters at the weekend. My eldest is at school now so we walk to school, then 3 days a week my 3 year old goes to nursery, so we then walk the mile there.

    I'm on maternity leave now, but when I go back to work (and have more money) I plan on taking my 2 eldest to gymnastics and swimming lessons.

    They'd been talking about healthy eating in my son's class last year, so he always asks about what's healthy and what's unhealthy, and is very aware of that now, which is great, and it means my 3 year old is also aware.

    We eat food mainly from scratch anyway, rarely any convenience foods, so they're used to it. We have a treat at the weekend, usually something I bake, and I let the kids choose what I make.

    They also love smoothies, which are a great way to get fruit in. I just chuck banana, frozen mango and frozen blueberries in the blender. For them it's like a treat.

    They only drink water or milk, except at a party. They do have the occasional hot chocolate babyccino when we're out.
    I agree that modelling behaviour is great too.....walk a lot, eat well, let kids see you exercising.
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    You are off to a good start, as you know, it starts in the kitchen. Children these days don't get outside as much as we use to. Family outings to the park are a great idea additionally, I would start incorporating weekend hikes with the whole family. Lead by example.
  • Kittyvicious1
    Kittyvicious1 Posts: 190 Member
    Dont make a big deal over his weight, this way his feelings and self perception are not hurt; he is only 7. Implement sports and lean meats, eliminate soda and candies; allow every now and then. He will eventually grow into his height and normal weight. I have three boys,my oldest was the same way. He when he was younger, he is now 14, lean and tall.
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    Work on your own health and his health will follow.

    If you buy healthy food and cook healthy meals, he will have no choice but to eat healthy food. Limit the availability of unhealthy snacks, but don't eliminate them entirely. Make fast food an occasional treat and not an every day occurrence. When you order fast food, exercise portion control -- don't order a super sized meal or two burgers for him -- a kids meal is enough for a kid.

    Engage in activity every day -- hike, bike, go to the park and work out while he plays, play catch, walk the dogs, sign him up for karate, football, soccer or another sport. Go swimming together.

    Teach him about "calories in/calories out" and coach him to eat at least 3 servings of fresh fruits and veggies every day. Limit seconds for everyone.

    Don't focus on his weight. Focus on family health instead.
  • housemamma
    housemamma Posts: 30 Member
    I agree to find fun activities such as bike riding, but realize living in an apartment might mean less space to store gear. One activity that my daughter loved was badminton. We just threw a stick on the ground and that served as our net. Lots of giggles and it does get your heart rate going.

    I'm proud of you working hard to improve your family health. Keep up the good work!
  • socalkay
    socalkay Posts: 746 Member
    Sounds like you are making the right adjustments. Good going, mom! Kids learn more from your actions than your words - lead by example.

    In this day and age, maybe some limits on the time kids can spend sitting indoors playing digital games or watching TV (at least during daylight hours).
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    Sounds like you are making the right adjustments. Good going mom! Kids learn more from your actions, not your words - lead by example.

    In this day and age, maybe some limits on the time kids can spend sitting indoors playing digital games or watching TV (at least during daylight hours).

    I agree with limiting TV and video games for everyone in the family. Turn off the TV and go hiking or go to the park. Encourage reading (not for weight loss, but for mental acuity) as an alternative to video games.

    Everything in moderation!
  • AlabasterVerve
    AlabasterVerve Posts: 3,171 Member
    Yoni Freedhoff (Weighty Matters Blog) is an excellent resource you might find helpful and encouraging. Basically, keep doing what you're doing -- provide nutritious home cooked meals from whole foods and be active as a family. Forced exercise and calorie counting is not the answer.

    ARTICLES (some from a quick Google search)

    Why You Shouldn't Put Your Child On A Diet
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/yoni-freedhoff/childhood-obesity_b_1399203.html

    Don't Blame Your Children for Their Weight
    http://health.usnews.com/health-news/blogs/eat-run/2013/08/28/dont-blame-your-children-for-their-weight

    Are You The Key To Your Child’s Best Weight?
    http://healthygrowingkids.com/yoni-freedhoff/

    Do You Know How to Feed Your Children?
    http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/yoni-freedhoff/child-nutrition_b_1116802.html


    SOME SUGGESTIONS

    - Cook healthy meals from whole ingredients for each and every meal.
    - Have sit down family dinners each and every night (remembering they don't need to be gourmet - kids do love peanut butter sandwiches).
    - Involve your children in meal (and school lunch) preparation.
    - Track the added sugars in your childrens' diets and try to limit to no more than 45 grams daily (remembering that some days should be exceptions too - sugar's part of childhood, it just needn't be a daily part).
    - Ensure that the only fruit they eat is actual fruit - no juices, rollups, chews, or mashes.
    - Make their milk white, not brown and sugary.
    - Ensure your children eat protein with every meal and snack, and that they start their days off with a wholesome, protein inclusive, breakfast.
    - Make restaurant meals and take out (including supermarket prepared takeout meals) exceedingly rare events.
    - Engage your family in family based physical activity - weekend hikes, nightly walks, signing up for community races, landscaping, home improvement projects, push lawnmowers, snow shoveling, etc.

    Source: http://www.weightymatters.ca/2011/08/horrifying-new-product-alert-body-fat.html


    WEIGHTY MATTERS BLOG TAGS

    Children:
    http://www.weightymatters.ca/search/label/children

    Parental No
    http://www.weightymatters.ca/search/label/Parental No


    Best wishes to you and your family. :flowerforyou:
  • rmw10c
    rmw10c Posts: 10 Member
    I don't have have kids, but I can tell you what bugged me as an overweight kid, which might help you decide how to deal with his weight. But, to start off, you are doing the right thing in changing your own eating habits, cooking so that you know what goes into the food, practicing moderation, and setting limits on treats for him (and any other kids you might have?).

    As an adult, I can clearly say that these things really affected my self esteem:

    *Father making comments about how fat I was.
    *Mother telling me I wasn't fat (even though I was 5 ft. and weighed 145 pounds at 12, and then 5 ft 4 in high school and weighed 200 pounds)
    *Waking up in the wee hours and hearing my parents arguing over me being fat.
    *Being told I couldn't eat something when everyone else could, and them eating in front of me talking about how good it was
    *Being told to exercise rather than my parents doing exercise activities with me.

    Please listen to your doctor and do not make his weight the focus, but continue practicing and teaching moderation. He's still growing, so don't put him on a diet either. He just might learn to make those healthier choices for himself as he grows up.

    I TOTALLY agree with all of this!! As a child I wasn't technically overweight, but I seemed chubby compared to my thin sister and mother. I heard about my weight from both of them on a regular basis which set me up for an eating disorder of secretly binging and then purging as a teenager.

    I really feel the best way to teach a child healthy eating and exercise habits is through modeling. Sounds like you're doing a great job of getting the family involved rather than singling him out!!
  • jennifurballs
    jennifurballs Posts: 247 Member
    Thank you so much everyone!!! I am trying very hard to make the right changes and be a better mom for him!! We never let him know he is overweight but I have heard kids make some comments. We tell him he is handsome and that he is big and strong like his dad. His dad used to try and make him clean his plate but I put a stop to that real quick. I try to start with small portions and if he wants more he can have some after his veggies are all gone. He loves fruit and veggies so that helps. We were a fast food family for a long time then we realized that not only were we all obese but we were broke all the time! Its amazing how much money we have saved but cutting out fast food. I have put that towards my grocery shopping. He loves to swim so I'm going to see if I can find a program at the Y for him. I take him to workout with me at our apartment when his Dad is at work and he asks me why I'm working out and I tell him so I can be healthy and strong. I hope this will stick with him.

    It sounds to me like you're going about this in the right way. Making it about your whole family being healthy, versus his weight. Good for you for getting on top of this now because it will be much more difficult for him if he's an overweight adolescent.

    I disagree with the doctor who told you he will grow into his weight. I have a 14 year old and I've observed him and most of the boys in his grade. Most of them grew into their weight, but they were carrying 10-15 extra lbs. and your son is about 50-55 lbs. over what his weight should be for his age and height. Mine isn't overweight, but he eats relatively healthy for a teen and drinks mostly water. The only thing I've restricted him from is soda and caffeine. Once he got old enough to have a soda at a friend's house or elsewhere, he didn't like them. He drinks skim milk with breakfast and he's very active. I have talked to him about portion sizes. He used to wait until he was starving to eat, then made a huge plate of food. But he's usually been one to stop eating when he feels full. I wish I had been that way for the last ten years. =o)

    Your son will likely begin to care about how he looks more when he starts going through puberty and liking girls. The fact that you're giving him a gentle head start will benefit him in the years to come.
  • pamhamor
    pamhamor Posts: 4 Member
    Yay for you! I think you sound like a great mom that is trying to lead by example. I stress about this all the time with my girls - they aren't overweight, but I know I could do better. Your post is motivating and a great reminder that kids learn by example. The great news is that he is only 7 - you still have a chance to help him form good eating and activity habits without putting pressure on him that could impact his self esteem.
  • MscGray
    MscGray Posts: 304 Member
    while all of these wonderful parents are chiming in with great suggestions.....i have another question people might be able to help with.....how do you get your extremely picky eater to eat fruits and veggies?....or even TRY them?....he started snubbing them when he was around 18 months and hasnt looked back.
  • penny0919
    penny0919 Posts: 123 Member
    My number #1 tip....NO SWEETENED DRINKS!!!

    Water only, along with a couple glasses of milk a day if he wants. I read recently that the number one contributer to chikdhood obesity is soda. But juice and other sweet drinks have a lot of extra calories too.

    Good for you mama and hang in there when things start to get tough.
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    while all of these wonderful parents are chiming in with great suggestions.....i have another question people might be able to help with.....how do you get your extremely picky eater to eat fruits and veggies?....or even TRY them?....he started snubbing them when he was around 18 months and hasnt looked back.

    Bribery? Lol. What about making a smoothie? You can get loads of fruit in that. My 3 year old will drink green smoothies too, with kale in them.

    My kids just eat what we do, and if they want yogurt or something after, they have to eat their veggies. My 5 year old didn't used to be interested on food at all, but he's fine now, and will eat whatever we make. He does whine sometimes, but he does eat it. My 3 year old has always eaten everything. She used to steal my Graze snacks - pistachios, seeds, dried fruit etc.