He told me to "lose some weight"

I'm sorry, but I disagree with you. Why make excuses for the guy? After reading this post, I was thinking about, what if I gained 40 pounds in two months because of something I could not control? If my boyfriend just stopped having sex with me I would assume the only reason he fell for me in the first place was my body. What if I had some other condition that seriously affected my physical image? Would that be ok for my boyfriend to say something like that to me. NO. In a relationship, there just has to be more. You should be attracted to somebody beyond what they look like. Yeah, I mean, when you first meet somebody physical image is involved, but shouldn't that transform over time? She weighed under one hundred pounds at 5'5"? Isn't that below the normal BMI for that height? Looking at her pictures, she is very pretty, and clearly this guy is just an *kitten*. However, I do agree that couples can work out together and it is great. My boyfriend and I run together and it is really fun!

The only reason this situation is unique is because of the perception that it was something that OP "couldn't control". But some of the comments are just... kind of naive and ridiculous. I would even say "love" and "physical attraction", while not necessarily mutually exclusive, certainly CAN be.

The idea that if you love someone you MUST be PHYSICALLY attracted to them no matter what, be it weight gain or horrible pirate disfigurement is the stuff of romance novels and has no bearing in reality. If you think about it, and I mean really think about it, you'll know that's the case. You ladies that love your husbands/boyfriends: I'm sure you'll still love them if they gained 50 lbs or 100 lbs or 150 lbs. You fall in love, after all, with the total package. But it makes mockery of us all for you to suggest that you would still be AS attracted to them... the definition, in fact, of "physical attraction" belies that.

Unbelievable, you definitely deserve better. If I was with you I would be telling you to stay as you are.

And what does that accomplish? Her boyfriend thinks she needs to lose weight. Whether he's correct or not that's his opinion... and frankly, there's no easy or hurtless way to broach that topic. The consequence of that however is that millions (and I'm tossing out numbers here) of relationships end up going down the road I just described above: the physical attraction disappears as couples "settle" into themselves, let themselves go after marriage, etc., and then wonder what happened... and mostly because people are embarrassed or ashamed or afraid to admit that part of what makes a relationship work IS the physical attraction.