When do you cut a MFP friend?

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bethvandenberg
bethvandenberg Posts: 1,496 Member
in Motivation and Support
Ok so I've noticed that I have some friends who have been missing for awhile. How long do you wait to cut someone? I'm just thinking I show up, I comment when I can, I try to encourage and motivate, so I just want a little back in return and if you're not showing up then you can do none of it.

So let's hear it people. How long do I wait?
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Replies

  • starkiss100
    starkiss100 Posts: 235 Member
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    A month or two, beyond that, they are off the wagon and staying off.
  • sabrads
    sabrads Posts: 152
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    Good question - I dont know if there is a limit to the number of friends you can have but I would think 2-4 weeks would be a fair time to allow them to at least check back in.

    What about if they are being negative all the time would you cut them straight away ?
  • NearlyThere2011
    NearlyThere2011 Posts: 29 Member
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    3 strikes and they're out! My motto for life, not just for MFP! :-)
  • mrscates
    mrscates Posts: 559 Member
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    I do not add anyone whos diary isn't public, they dont send a message with their FR or they haven't logged in for a few days. a few days can mean alot when it comes to eating right and trying to lose weight
  • mrscates
    mrscates Posts: 559 Member
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    250 limit
    Good question - I dont know if there is a limit to the number of friends you can have but I would think 2-4 weeks would be a fair time to allow them to at least check back in.

    What about if they are being negative all the time would you cut them straight away ?
  • elfie9863
    elfie9863 Posts: 337
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    Honestly...I used to to all that too before I came back on the second time. Now, I sorta don't like all t he play by play on my home page from the "friends" and their "friends"...and just cruise the boards and comment here and there when I feel like it. Just my own personal thinking. I really do appreciate all those who send the nice comments and encouragement to those that need it tho.
  • julwills
    julwills Posts: 286 Member
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    If they haven't logged on for a month or more I delete them as a friend.
  • fitniknik
    fitniknik Posts: 713 Member
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    good point about the diary's!! I freaking hate it when people have their diary private!

    I cut em loose when they have been gone 2-4 weeks.. or if they do or say something that is annoying to me consistantly :( im a bad person
  • anewattitude
    anewattitude Posts: 483 Member
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    I Have people on my list who haven't logged on in a while also and some never offer encouragement but when I choose to accept a friend request I do so because I want to be able to help someone else stay motivated. I have many who offer their support to me so the few who don't I don't let it bother me. Also I haven't cut anyone for not logging on because I don't know their situation. Maybe they had something happen. I always give people the benefit of the doubt, however if someone on my list starts being crude, or judgemental and negative then its time to say adios!
  • mrscates
    mrscates Posts: 559 Member
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    I cut ppl if they say things that are annoying, lmao
    good point about the diary's!! I freaking hate it when people have their diary private!

    I cut em loose when they have been gone 2-4 weeks.. or if they do or say something that is annoying to me consistantly :( im a bad person
  • Dencrossgirl
    Dencrossgirl Posts: 501 Member
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    If they are off for three months they are gone, gives you opportunity to add someone who wants/gives support.
  • madijo41
    madijo41 Posts: 367 Member
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    I have always wondered about that. I cut them loose after a month or so. What about if you take the time to always say nice (encouraging) things and some say nothing... nothing...nothing. Which means they are taking...taking...taking. I get weirdly hurt by that. :brokenheart:
  • SassyMissDasha
    SassyMissDasha Posts: 614
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    Never! Just because a person doesn't check in does not mean they can't stay my friend .. what if they decide to come back, and they have no friends. How discouraging would that be? And plus I have like 240 friends on my list and I can't keep track half the time who is still here or who is not .. so I just leave them. I've had a few friends come back and say I was away for awhile but now I'm back and ready to get back to it. And that's great.
  • mummum2
    mummum2 Posts: 415 Member
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    I Have people on my list who haven't logged on in a while also and some never offer encouragement but when I choose to accept a friend request I do so because I want to be able to help someone else stay motivated. I have many who offer their support to me so the few who don't I don't let it bother me. Also I haven't cut anyone for not logging on because I don't know their situation. Maybe they had something happen. I always give people the benefit of the doubt, however if someone on my list starts being crude, or judgemental and negative then its time to say adios!

    Ditto, entirely agree with the above statement. That could be me saying this.
  • MelissaL582
    MelissaL582 Posts: 1,422 Member
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    I've deleted people who haven't commented on anything I do for more than a week. I'm on here quite a bit sending everyone a comment; I know some people can't do it all the time or on here at different times..but you can at least comment at least once on what I've done. It's a 2 way street..not me always commenting on what you do. Before I do delete them, I check out their profile and if they haven't responded to anyone..they're off my list. I'm here to get motivated and if they aren't helping me..what's the point on keeping them? I've also deleted people who don't take it serious, who continue to eat junk food and doesn't take anyone's advice.

    What also annoys me is when people have no information about themselves.
  • Amajoy
    Amajoy Posts: 140 Member
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    3 strikes and they're out! My motto for life, not just for MFP! :-)

    I hope you dont use this theory with relationships... AHAHAHAHA! It's 1 strike your out for me! :laugh:
  • ♥Violette♥4Ever♥
    ♥Violette♥4Ever♥ Posts: 457 Member
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    I have reached my 250 limit and have several friend request in the wings and I don't know who to cut....nor do I want to cut anyone. So I'm not sure what to do at this point.
  • mrscates
    mrscates Posts: 559 Member
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    3 strikes and they're out! My motto for life, not just for MFP! :-)

    DITTO!I hope you dont use this theory with relationships... AHAHAHAHA! It's 1 strike your out for me! :laugh:
  • mandalina23
    mandalina23 Posts: 77
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    I do not add anyone whos diary isn't public, they dont send a message with their FR or they haven't logged in for a few days. a few days can mean alot when it comes to eating right and trying to lose weight

    When you say diary you mean food diary? You can make that public? How do you know if yours is or not?

    To answer the topic question, I say that if it is bringing you down, or de-motivating you then delete them, maybe try to send them a message and see what's going on, if you don't hear back from them or see that their dedication is still very lackluster then delete them, it seems to me the whole point of this site is for support on our weight loss stay fit and healthy journey's ... It's hard to show the support and recieve it one ended. Best of luck with your decision and your journey! :)
  • vikeschick42
    vikeschick42 Posts: 28
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    This is probably rude of me, but the only people I have as friends are people I actually know. It just gets so overwhelming to see all the posts otherwise, and I feel like I have to comment all the time. I get friend invites and decline them. I hope people don't think I'm being rude. I'm not trying to be. I've been on other sites and started down the whole "friending" path and it just gets to be too much. I try to comment on message boards and provide support if someone posts something where they need help. But I keep my friend list to those I personally know. It's what works for me.

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