Comments on Weight Loss by friends/family

mhlew
mhlew Posts: 377 Member
I was curious what the general opinion was on this topic, but are most people hesitent to comment on weight loss? I am dying to hear my friends say "you look like your losing weight" or "have you lost weight?".

I have received maybe 3 comments one from my Mom, and the other from a friend (granted I have a lot to lose, I dont think 16 pounds is super noticeable yet going from 293 to 278) but in comparison pictures you can see it.

One friend who I am close with she said a lot of people do not like to give compliments. Now before everyone says "dont worry about comments, you need to do this for you and your health blah blah" Yes - these are my reasons too for losing weight, but a big motivator is looking and feeling great and people taking notice. I think that is awesome when peole take notice of your hard work. Thoughts?

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Replies

  • mhoeff1
    mhoeff1 Posts: 163 Member
    I have lost 40 pounds and I may have received 3 compliments and I can tell a difference. Your friend is right people don’t like to give compliments we come from a world of complainers and haters. Your doing great and I bet when you get to goal you will get compliments.
  • MrsATrotta
    MrsATrotta Posts: 278 Member
    I love it when ppl comment on weight loss but it doesn't always happen lol. I have gone from 258 to 212 and the same ppl (closee friends and family) are the ones noticing and commenting. Not one person at work has mentioned my nearly 50 lb loss. It is what it is. I know someday I'm gonna walk into work wearing the right shirt or just looking good and someone will say something but until then I just keep at it :)
  • lolabluola
    lolabluola Posts: 212 Member
    I think sometimes someone may think if they say you look like you've lost weight they are saying they noticed you looked over weight before? Also it may not be appropriate in the workplace for comments on appearance? So if people close to you are noticing that's fantastic, other people may not feel comfortable commenting on weight.
  • JoshD8705
    JoshD8705 Posts: 390 Member
    I like the comments on my muscle gains more than my weight loss, but both are nice. I've had a few of both. It did feel good when my niece was able to give me a full hug, and she said I was getting small lol.
  • goanothermile
    goanothermile Posts: 98 Member
    Weight loss happens relatively slowly. People you see every day don't suddenly see a change. In my experience, you are more likely to get a comment from someone that you haven't seen in a while.
  • Zerodette
    Zerodette Posts: 200 Member
    Some people may avoid saying anything for fear of awkwardness. "You look great! I mean, you looked great before... I mean..."
  • mz_getskinny
    mz_getskinny Posts: 258 Member
    I swear, some days I feel like I just do it for the compliments! lol I'm kidding...but compliments = confidence in my book!
  • GenesiaElizabeth
    GenesiaElizabeth Posts: 227 Member
    mhoeff1 wrote: »
    I have lost 40 pounds and I may have received 3 compliments and I can tell a difference. Your friend is right people don’t like to give compliments we come from a world of complainers and haters. Your doing great and I bet when you get to goal you will get compliments.

    I've hard my share of this as well and I agree.. ^^

    73722255.png

  • headofphat
    headofphat Posts: 1,597 Member
    If someone gives you a compliment remain humble and say thanks.
    If someone doesn't give you a compliment it doesn't mean they didn't notice but they don't want to comment on it because maybe they're not sure. I've lost 90lbs and when people compliment me they usually say something like, "you're looking good" or "you look like you've lost some weight". I usually smile and say thanks for noticing (instead of "hell yes i look good" or "some weight? really? i've lost a Victoria's Secret model.")

    :D
  • GenesiaElizabeth
    GenesiaElizabeth Posts: 227 Member
    headofphat wrote: »
    If someone gives you a compliment remain humble and say thanks.
    If someone doesn't give you a compliment it doesn't mean they didn't notice but they don't want to comment on it because maybe they're not sure. I've lost 90lbs and when people compliment me they usually say something like, "you're looking good" or "you look like you've lost some weight". I usually smile and say thanks for noticing (instead of "hell yes i look good" or "some weight? really? i've lost a Victoria's Secret model.")

    :D

    I need to be like you... :#

  • lmkpete
    lmkpete Posts: 12 Member
    I lost over 40 pounds in 6 months and went to visit family that hadn't seen me in over a year -nothing was said which was disappointing.
    So I try to remind myself that most people never mentioned when I was putting on 20, 30,40 and more pounds...
    I have noticed that after maintaining for awhile and toning up I've had more comments which is appreciated!
    I think there is something to co-workers not saying anything because it is the work place. Seems like even positive things are taken out of context and offends someone so most people do notice but will keep it to themselves.
  • Yoles79
    Yoles79 Posts: 36 Member
    I love to compliment. Great job keep it up whether people comment or not. You know the saying misery loves company.
  • AskTracyAnnK28
    AskTracyAnnK28 Posts: 2,817 Member
    edited October 2014
    I've received a lot of them this week. Funny thing is that they are from co-workers/colleagues who I rarely speak to or interact with :smile:

    But yeah - they all started out by saying (on the down low) "have you lost weight?" One guy was funny and was like "Please don't narc me out to HR but you look awesome!" lololol
  • ChronicOptimist
    ChronicOptimist Posts: 558 Member
    I've lost 68 pounds so far and to be honest the only people who have commented are people who know I'm working to lose weight. Sure, it would be nice for others to notice, but I trust that they are noticing, they are just choosing not to comment for whatever reason.

    I was with a friend last summer who ran into someone she knew and she made a comment about how that person was looking "So thin and so tan!" Turned out the person she was complimenting was losing weight from liver failure and the "tan" was actually jaundice. So... some people can just get a little gun shy about compliments in that vein!

    Remember to give YOURSELF compliments every day! I know that I am my own harshest critic and the best thing I can do is look at myself in the mirror for a moment and feel really proud. That feels better than any comment from another person!
  • BRobertson23
    BRobertson23 Posts: 150 Member
    I'm pretty sure I tooted my own horn several times before others really started to verbally take notice. But I lost weight with my family, and my husband was my biggest supporter and workout buddy, so the things that we got excited about we'd share with each other or make comments to each other.....because if no one else could, WE noticed a difference! One of the things that I did when I was about a month or more into our weight loss, was started doing those 30 Day Challenges. I would post EVERY DAY when I completed the day's challenge. Eventually people realized I was serious about this, and as I posted pictures or went on visits, people noticed and commented more. If you've just begun your journey, give it time, people will start to take notice...if they don't acknowledge your weightloss, they should hopefully see that your healthier and happier!
  • cosmichvoyager
    cosmichvoyager Posts: 237 Member
    yep, it is terrible to tell someone--"oh, you lost weight!" only to find out it's because they have been sick or something. I think that keeps people from saying anything about weight loss.
  • Ronij59
    Ronij59 Posts: 191 Member
    I think it is a firm concessus across the board that none of us get many comments and when we do they are either very very sincere or very backhanded and far and few between. WE do definately live in a society of self conscience people and they are afraid to say anything because of the stigma and all the sexual harasment that has run rampant in the workplace. People in general are just scared these days. When I take a walk I say hi to everyone I see. Very rarely do I get greeted first. I figure "oh well". Also think of this. When you get down to where you want to be and you have been on maintenance, no one will ever notice. You will just be as you are now. No one will have known that you were bigger than you are now and so when they see you they are NOT going to see anything different than who you are. So just relish in the fact that you have been successful and dont worry about what others may or may not say.
  • Cortneyrenee04
    Cortneyrenee04 Posts: 1,117 Member
    They'll comment soon- you'll see! I've heard that the more weight you have to lose, the longer it takes for people to notice, especially when they see you a lot.

    I think people started to comment when I was at the 20 pound lost mark (a little under 1/3 of the way through.)
  • shballa
    shballa Posts: 133 Member
    People started to notice when I had to buy clothes in a smaller size. I tried to hold onto the old clothes as long as possible. And when I went shopping, I found out I had shrunk 3 sizes!
  • kharmon2013
    kharmon2013 Posts: 63 Member
    Im really encouraged by the compliments, but most of them come from family or close friends who have seen the hard work. Everyonce in awhile someone else says something, and I get a little bounce to my step :) I would say it depends on body type, and where you show your weight.
  • NikonPal
    NikonPal Posts: 1,346 Member
    The best compliment I received came from a pharmacist clerk that I never remembered waiting on me. She said "Didn't you use to be extremely heavy?" She then added "you are looking good." Nothing like a comment by essentially a stranger...I don't have to wonder if she was just being kind.
  • jennifurballs
    jennifurballs Posts: 247 Member
    edited October 2014
    I love it when people notice. A cheerleader at my son's school told me last night at a football game that I looked great. My Mom told me today that I look 20 years younger. Loved that one!
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,324 Member
    love this topic.. here is what i think from my experience. When I got down to my goal weight before..people started commenting when i was about at goal. It happened all of a sudden.. and i wondered why people didn't say anything as I was losing? Honestly, i don't think they noticed until that point.

    I also think that some people are afraid if might be rude or make someone uncomfortable to mention their weight in public.
  • sarieth05
    sarieth05 Posts: 313 Member
    Nobody I know has said anything to me, but I feel like I'm losing weight evenly so it may be harder to see. My husband did check out my butt in my jeans and told me it looked dumpy because of how baggy they were, so... that made me both chuckle and freak out about needing new pants. My mother-in-law apparently said something to my husband about noticing some of my weight loss, and I was kind of like... oh man, should have said that to ME.
  • salgal33
    salgal33 Posts: 49 Member
    My compliments have come from a few. I am down 36 pounds and I think for my co-workers its been harder for them to notice because the weight has come off slowly over the last 10 months and I haven't made any proclamations or talk about my food or fitness regimen.
    However I was at a business conference last week wearing a rather fitted (but appropriate) new outfit. Our COO approached me at a break and asked if I had been losing weight. He was very encouraging.
    Then I was at the high school for a practice and one of my girls said "Coach! you look hot! " ... Compliments from a 16 yr old....I'll take it. B)

  • MegE_N
    MegE_N Posts: 245 Member
    So funny you should post this today! I was out with some friends last night and one was kind of drunk. I hadn't seen him in quite some time and he kept going on about how good I looked. When the conversation turned to just the two of us he was asking about it, I explained, and he just stayed on topic. I eventually managed to slip a conversation-change in there. At the end of the night I went to hug him goodbye and he kept going on, "You look great, keep it up, keep it up." I felt awkward - it seemed a bit like overkill, like drawing too much attention to it.

    I guess it's just like anything - there's a polite way to do it and a not-so-polite way to do it.
  • fmpro
    fmpro Posts: 15 Member
    My SW was 335 lbs and I can tell you that my efforts went unnoticed until I reached the 60-70 pound mark. I'm now down 120lbs and frequently get comments. Stick with it!
  • Raynne413
    Raynne413 Posts: 1,527 Member
    mhlew wrote: »
    I was curious what the general opinion was on this topic, but are most people hesitent to comment on weight loss? I am dying to hear my friends say "you look like your losing weight" or "have you lost weight?".

    I have received maybe 3 comments one from my Mom, and the other from a friend (granted I have a lot to lose, I dont think 16 pounds is super noticeable yet going from 293 to 278) but in comparison pictures you can see it.

    One friend who I am close with she said a lot of people do not like to give compliments. Now before everyone says "dont worry about comments, you need to do this for you and your health blah blah" Yes - these are my reasons too for losing weight, but a big motivator is looking and feeling great and people taking notice. I think that is awesome when peole take notice of your hard work. Thoughts?

    For me, I don't always say something for a few reasons. The first is that if they really aren't losing weight, I wouldn't want to upset them. Also, I never know WHY someone is losing weight. Where I've work, we've recently had a LOT of people that have lost a LOT of noticeable weight, and it is because they have cancer.

    Now if someone is telling me they are trying to lose weight, and I notice a difference in them, THEN I will say something!
  • Jennifer10723
    Jennifer10723 Posts: 374 Member
    I didn't hear anything until after 25 pounds lost. I got a couple .. "are you losing weight" and I got one .. you are looking really good! Made me feel good. It is nice to get that nod that what you are doing is working. It will come.
  • ashleybreanna13
    ashleybreanna13 Posts: 249 Member
    It's a shame that people are "scared" to compliment people anymore. I mean, I do it a lot, and when I do, it's almost like people are thinking I am hitting on them? Not sure, but they can get used to it, cause I say what I think, and what I think, is a compliment!!
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