Comments on Weight Loss by friends/family
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Here is some slight progress
On the left is in mid-May 2014 and the right is today (10/9/14) That was my bday weekend and i remember i just felt so bloated and out of shape that weekend, then i started changing my diet in late july and working out more regularly. I was prob about 295 on the left and 279 now. Not noticeable yet, but i feel better. Cant wait til I make a huge dent.
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Aspire2BACat wrote: »
- Maybe they are not comfortable with you losing weight because they perceive it as a challenge to their will power (of course they should not, everyone has to meet the challenge of weight loss on their own schedule, forcing it will FAIL EVERY time);
- As a few others have commented, maybe they question why you are losing, it could be due to health reasons and that could be dicey; or they fear it implies you needed to lose weight and they don't want to give that impression;
- My least favorite... Jealousy. I don't think there is too, too much of that out there. At least not blatant or conscious jealousy, but it is a possibility.
This, especially the bolded one. Before I completely fell off the wagon the first time *coughs* , I had lost close to 30 lbs. out of pure jealousy however, my good friend bashed me in a very public manner on social media saying that I was unhealthy and I was stupid and they couldn't believe id cut a food group ( im lactose...I get so ill from it I cant even move). Surprisingly enough, this really discouraged me and I quickly gained it back. Now that im back on track again and down 28.9 ish lbs, my bashing friend is still at the stage of I should workout/eat better three years later and is once again upset about my transformation through hit workouts and watching my macros/portions
Im not saying people are all jealous, but those quoted reasons are probably why most don't comment. It took about 20 lbs this time for me ( im very short however) for anyone to notice my loss, family included.0 -
Personally, I've received many comments and compliments. Many more than I would have expected and they've come from everywhere...family, friends, co-workers, people I see everyday and people I see every few weeks. I think my niece gave me the best compliment so far. I don't see her very often and the last time I did, she looked at me, did a double take and said "Wow, I wish I could lose half a person!". That really made my day.
I do know that it never gets old! I try to always keep the conversation lighthearted and say thank you.
I have also had people pull me aside and ask me confidentially if I was sick. That sounds like it would be a downer but it hasn't been. Those conversations turn out great simply because I am able to alleviate their concerns and they can "celebrate" my health.
The other thing I've learned (and it has been stated here on the forums many times) is that once you tell people that you've lost weight just by watching what you eat and exercising, most lose interest quickly. They're happy for you but they really were hoping to hear about some miracle pill.0 -
BruceHedtke wrote: »The other thing I've learned (and it has been stated here on the forums many times) is that once you tell people that you've lost weight just by watching what you eat and exercising, most lose interest quickly. They're happy for you but they really were hoping to hear about some miracle pill.
Omg this is soooooooooo true!!!! They don't want to hear the truth. Just going for a miracle!
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While I'm all for receiving compliments, they do start to get irritating after a while. In the office for example, people will comment about it and tell me "you look great" or "wow, you've gotten skinny" and they make an entire conversation about it to other people RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! But they say it soooo loud the whole freaking office can hear and it's quite embarrassing. It makes me think "wow, I must have really been a fat @$$ back then".
Of course, there's other who will say "you've lost a considerable amount of weight, what have you been doing?" And I tell them calorie counting and they just respond "hm". Like they were expecting something else. As someone else said, they lose interest at that point and the conversation ends (luckily for me
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Here is some slight progress
On the left is in mid-May 2014 and the right is today (10/9/14) That was my bday weekend and i remember i just felt so bloated and out of shape that weekend, then i started changing my diet in late july and working out more regularly. I was prob about 295 on the left and 279 now. Not noticeable yet, but i feel better. Cant wait til I make a huge dent.
It's totally noticeable!!! Great work!0 -
I am happy when others comment on where they see the weight loss because I don't see it just like I refused to acknowledge the weight gain. I have never been one to preen in front of the mirror so I can tell in my cloths but not the mirror. I am lucky to have friends at work also trying to live a healthier life style so we encourage each other.0
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Thanks lola.. See I feel motivated again! lol. Nice progress your self!
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I prefer to compliment someone saying "you are looking great" rather than focus on their weight alone.0
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lemonsurprise wrote: »I find older people compliment me more than younger! I'm self employed and my older customers are more blunt and will say I look like I've lost weight, or ask me if I have. Whereas the not so older ones won't say anything, or they'll say I look pretty, or another compliment that isn't weight related!
Like others have said, I think it can be an awkward subject for some to broach.
I've also heard off of a friends mum that she saw a group of my closest friends down the gym and they all said how well I'd been doing to her, but they haven't said a word to me! I think they must think by saying "you look really good" translates in to "you looked *kitten* before!"
I agree with above. Only very direct people have said anything the rest have been saying my hair looks really good? I have had 3 compliments: a) from my mom b) from my husband c) from an older candid friend.0 -
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I've told some friends that I'm trying to lose weight and have discussed the difficulty (I have a really hard time losing because of some medical conditions). There was even a day when I was really scared and upset because of the primary medical issue that hampers weight loss... I couldn't fall asleep because I could die if I didn't stay awake and deal with the issues. It was getting late and I didn't see any end in sight, so I was commenting on Facebook. Some people didn't understand and thought I was suicidal (apparently you talk about dying and it freaks out friends who don't get it), so then I had to clarify for them, and... anyway, I notice that when people know how much of a struggle I'm making to lose weight, they are more inclined to comment about noticing positive changes in my appearance.0
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So far, even though I've lost 60lbs, the only folks that have mentioned it are people that have been following my weight loss updates. I admit, as shallow as it is, it's disappointing that other folks haven't gone all "OMG! You look great!!"
That said, a few years ago, I lost like 15lbs, and someone said to me "OMG, you lost a TON of weight!" and I felt like *kitten* for about 3 days. So, lol, who knows ... maybe it's better if people say quiet.0 -
My SW was 335 lbs and I can tell you that my efforts went unnoticed until I reached the 60-70 pound mark. I'm now down 120lbs and frequently get comments. Stick with it!
Exactly! It took about a 50 lb loss before anybody really noticed my weight loss. I now get frequent comments from those that haven't seen me in awhile.0 -
my mom and boyfriend... it feels great to have support 0
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While I'm all for receiving compliments, they do start to get irritating after a while. In the office for example, people will comment about it and tell me "you look great" or "wow, you've gotten skinny" and they make an entire conversation about it to other people RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! But they say it soooo loud the whole freaking office can hear and it's quite embarrassing. It makes me think "wow, I must have really been a fat @$$ back then".
Of course, there's other who will say "you've lost a considerable amount of weight, what have you been doing?" And I tell them calorie counting and they just respond "hm". Like they were expecting something else. As someone else said, they lose interest at that point and the conversation ends (luckily for me )
^^This x1000.
Walking around the office feels like running the gauntlet quite frankly. It's a relief to be in a meeting with people who I've only met recently. They only know me as me now..
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