Body Shaming - Your Views/Opinions and Experiences

NikkiLouise15
NikkiLouise15 Posts: 67 Member
in Chit-Chat
Hi everybody,

For those of you that are not my friends here is my recent status update.

am beyond tired... BEYOND! on another note please Google Myla Dalbesio, she is Calvin Kleins new PLUS SIZE model I repeat PLUS SIZE. Oh Em Gee if she is plus size then I must be a XXXL. Some people on social media are slamming her for being FAT :( I am sooo over this body shaming. Too thin or too fat - body shaming is NOT cool. Body shaming in the media is partly to blame for my own insecurites, I worry for my son and any other future children I may have that they will never feel good enough unless they are starving themselves or pumping themselves with steroids to achieve what we now portray as 'beautiful'. RANT OVER!

Are any of you suffering from huge insecurities? Is the media to blame? What is 'normal' nowadays? Is a (UK) size 14 fat?

Discuss
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Replies

  • magnum26
    magnum26 Posts: 356 Member
    Size 14 is not fat, I believe it's actually the UK average atm.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    I've experienced skinny shaming much more than fat shaming.
  • NikkiLouise15
    NikkiLouise15 Posts: 67 Member
    randomtai wrote: »
    I've experienced skinny shaming much more than fat shaming.

    Any body shaming is wrong and I am no angel - I have found myself saying "shes far too thin" I hate all of it
  • LynneW1983
    LynneW1983 Posts: 1,161 Member
    I'm 5ft 7 a uk size 14 and I def feel fat. I am still classed as overweight.
  • refuseresist
    refuseresist Posts: 934 Member
    Some people called me skeletal when I was nearly overweight by BMI :|
  • HealthyVitamins
    HealthyVitamins Posts: 432 Member
    UK size 14 is fat on a short person, people just don't think it is because it's so common nowadays..and the UK average size is 16 which is even worse and has given people an excuse to be fat because, well...it's 'average'
  • FloyMcCaudie
    FloyMcCaudie Posts: 1,132
    edited November 2014
    Ikr. You dont have right to comment on anyone's body! You should feel ashamed for doing so if you do it! If you cant bring out positive vibes, dont bring out negative one neither. Try motivating them instead of bring them down..



    -youtubes Myla Delbesio, comments "you are a fat fawkin looser *kitten*, Get off the ramp and let the skinny chicks walk by"-
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
    14 UK is 10 US, right? As with anything, whether that is overweight or not depends on height. If you're 5'7", that sounds like a perfectly healthy size. If you're 5'1", that's probably a bit on the hefty side. This model certainly shouldn't be considered "plus size," but she is compared to the other models. Sucks, but that's the way the fashion/modeling industry is and probably always will be. Remember the Dove ads with women of all shapes and sizes? There was a lot of backlash when that ad came out and the commercials didn't last long because people complained that they didn't want to see that.

    It's arbitrary evidence, but when I was 15 or 16, my brother-in-law (my sister's husband's brother) thought it was funny to call me fat and even said I looked like a beach ball. Keep in mind that I was 5'4" 160 lbs. Overweight, yes, but nowhere near "beach ball" status. I found out later that he was dating a girl that was 300+ lbs. It seems that skinny white boys calling women fat are the first ones to end up in bed with an overweight woman. Interesting.

    It's just human nature, even if it's not fair. I'm willing to bet we're all guilty of making comments about other people's bodies, whether we admit it or not. Is it okay? No. But it's not going to change. I found developing thicker skin helped me - just stop caring about what other people think of you. And be more aware of the things you say about others. It's a lot easier to change your mindset and behavior than to change other people's behavior. In fact, it's nearly impossible to accomplish the latter. C'est la vie.
  • louiseoxford
    louiseoxford Posts: 44 Member
    Honestly, when I was a UK size 14 (before I started MFP properly) I FELT incredibly fat and what really shocked me was that my BMI was classed as overweight, I'm 5'6". So I would have classed myself as fat but none of my friends or family would ever have classed me as 'fat', they tell me now that they never saw me as fat!

    I am a UK size 10 now, I have a healthy BMI and I feel incredible. I used to compare myself to a lot of thin celebrities (Alexa Chung was a particular fave) and get very upset that I didn't have a body like theirs and although my body at the moment is far from perfect, yes I wish my legs were thinner...longer, I no longer have even nearly the amount the insecurities I once had when I felt big because I have reached a point where I am finally happy with myself and body.

    I think that honestly being 'fat' is a personal view, it's whether you FEEL fat and what you believe being 'fat' is.

    I do think actual body shaming is awful in general, tabloids printing celebrities who have gained weight/lost weight/in bikinis does not help anyone, women always seem to be told they're 'too fat', 'too thin', 'lost too much weight', 'wear too much make up' it simply makes everyone insecure about their bodies.
  • lydiamather1
    lydiamather1 Posts: 11 Member
    Skinny shaming is just as bad as fat shaming. There were girls in high school who all the guys would tease and joke about her being the size of a whale and that she eats too much. She was probably a size 0 and the guys just thought it was funny because everyone knew none of it was true, but it really bothered her sometimes. I've always been bigger, I'm 5'9" and a size 14. If anyone has heard the song "All about that bass" then they know it's about calling bigger women beautiful, so naturally I liked it. It wasn't until later that I realized that it was also skinny shaming and sending a misleading message to young girls about loving their body because guys like it. Here is a great cover that I think sends a positive message to everyone.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVyJL8UM6mI&safe=active
  • thatswhatshesaiddd
    thatswhatshesaiddd Posts: 62 Member
    GorillaEsquire wrote: »
    Why do you care what other people think?

    +1 ^ . To be happy and confident, ya'll just worry about what YOU think about yourselves. Someones always going to have something to say. B)
  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
    I care a lot about what people say when it's public bullying and shaming. You sit in front of your TV and criticize this or that celebrity and that's on you. But putting it out in the world makes it a bigger social issue, in which people begin to think with a mob mentality and group individuals into "sets" that can be guiltlessly discriminated against. What seems like a small injury to one person can build up in society until crimes against groups of people become OK because they're "inferior."
  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
    Disagree. Not speaking up gives the impression that no one objects, and the behavior continues unabated.
  • refuseresist
    refuseresist Posts: 934 Member
    Whatever he thinks about others - he really thinks a lot of himself!
  • lorib642
    lorib642 Posts: 1,942 Member
    I don't know if anyone is to blame, but when I was growing up I knew boys that were insecure about their size. I don't know that it was all bad if it led them to weight training and fitness. I also knew girls that were concerned with their weight/looks. I know I felt like I didn't measure up.

    There are mixed messages nowadays, with every body is fine and we have to be concerned about the outliers for health reasons.

    The companies can call whatever size they want, plus size. She definitely isn't fat.

    I don't want to be normal. I want to be healthy at whatever weight. My target is a healthy bmi. I will reevaluate when I get closer.
  • PurringMyrrh
    PurringMyrrh Posts: 5,276 Member
    I'm super over body shaming shaming. Guess what? You're too fat. Guess what? You're too thin. Just because you're average doesn't mean you're healthy. People will take any words and any situation and twist them to suit their own ideals. Myla is plus sized compared to the other models of that brand (and the sizes they offer). No thigh gap? Check. You're hired. "Oh but what about the influence on girls?" Be a bigger influence to your kids than the media and major corporations are and that's not an issue.

    What constitutes "plus size" anyhow? Anything over a 10? 12?
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    edited November 2014
    People that are easily offended, are easily controlled.


    wow...I've never thought of it that way.

  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
    GorillaEsquire wrote: »
    knitapeace wrote: »
    Disagree. Not speaking up gives the impression that no one objects, and the behavior continues unabated.
    Let's test that theory.
    Right now you are refreshing your screen to come back and see if I retorted. Right?
    And you would keep doing so, until I responded.
    And you would have felt "let-down" if I in turn, never countered or posted back.
    And now that I have retorted, you are already crafting, in your mind, a witty, powerful, "show-stopper" of a response.
    And I planned the whole thing, from the second I posted word one.

    People that are easily offended, are easily controlled.
    When you know how someone is going to react, you can calculate ways to manipulate those individuals... like I just did here to prove my point.

    (Not that you're easily offended... I'm just evil, and REALLY REALLY good at winning arguments :smiley: )

    Unrelated, I like your glasses.

    You want to know what's funny? I went off to get some work done and forgot all about this thread until now...

    Thank you for the compliment!

  • habit365
    habit365 Posts: 174
    Google image search of this model is NSFW. She is obviously verrrrry comfortable with her "plus-sizedness". :o
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    as someone who has lost 113lbs...im not in favor od shaming people, but lets be real.....plus size models are fat and we shouldnt be enabling fatness.
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    GorillaEsquire wrote: »
    Why do you care what other people think?
    if I cared I wouldnt quote this remark and reply. Oh wait...FARKKKKKKK
  • greenminimalist
    greenminimalist Posts: 30
    I body-shame myself all the time, and I have been at both ends of the spectrum. I never feel I can win. I'm either too fat or I'm too skinny. Which is it? It's whatever works for them at the time. I'm a happy healthy size 14.

    I blame half of my issue on the media, half on my family and friends out of jealously.
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    GorillaEsquire wrote: »
    LoneWolf_70 wrote: »
    as someone who has lost 113lbs...im not in favor od shaming people, but lets be real.....plus size models are fat and we shouldnt be enabling fatness.
    "enabling unhealthy lifestyles"
    Agreed.

    I liked fatness better, but we can go with the more appropriate PC term, since I dont want to be banned by the mods for the 6th time.
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    greenminimalist wrote: »
    I body-shame myself all the time, and I have been at both ends of the spectrum. I never feel I can win. I'm either too fat or I'm too skinny. Which is it? It's whatever works for them at the time. I'm a happy healthy size 14.

    I blame half of my issue on the media, half on my family and friends out of jealously.

    none of it is the stupid mirror's fault? I kid, I kid.

  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    What gets me is that a lot of body-shaming is really just a constant reminder that women's bodies are public property. Like I OWE it to all the dudes out there to watch my weight so they can enjoy looking at me.
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    GorillaEsquire wrote: »
    LoneWolf_70 wrote: »
    GorillaEsquire wrote: »
    LoneWolf_70 wrote: »
    as someone who has lost 113lbs...im not in favor od shaming people, but lets be real.....plus size models are fat and we shouldnt be enabling fatness.
    "enabling unhealthy lifestyles"
    Agreed.

    I liked fatness better, but we can go with the more appropriate PC term, since I dont want to be banned by the mods for the 6th time.
    6??
    Oh, young Jedi. The force is strong in you, but you still have much to learn.
    I could knock 6 out in a weekend. Hahaha

    Young Jedi? Ah, Grand Poobah, Its been a while since Ive been young and I am none too wise be a jedi. Still, being banned 6x and not having to deac and getting back in the forums, does show a modicum of skill, does it not?
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    sofaking6 wrote: »
    What gets me is that a lot of body-shaming is really just a constant reminder that women's bodies are public property. Like I OWE it to all the dudes out there to watch my weight so they can enjoy looking at me.

    well, uh. Yes.

  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    public property usually requires constant upkeep and care, so I assume you're especially well groomed? #askingforafriend
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    "Too thin or too fat - body shaming is NOT cool."

    "they will never feel good enough unless they are starving themselves or pumping themselves with steroids to achieve what we now portray as 'beautiful'."

    these two statements contradict each other. If body shaming is not cool, why imply that people who have reached society's "ideal" must be deprived to the point of unhealthy or using enhancement drugs? That's the same as assuming that all overweight people drink so much soda that their blood is 50% corn syrup and risk heart attacks simply by looking at a treadmill. :\

    I agree that body shaming is unacceptable, but it goes both ways. Be more careful what you put out there - it comes back to you.
  • lorib642
    lorib642 Posts: 1,942 Member
    LoneWolf_70 wrote: »
    as someone who has lost 113lbs...im not in favor od shaming people, but lets be real.....plus size models are fat and we shouldnt be enabling fatness.

    I didn't think she looked fat. She isn't model thin.

    I don't know that plus size models that look more like someone of average weight enable obesity.

    Do you think Meghan Trainor enables fatness with it's all about the bass?

    I have no argument here. I am torn. I want people to feel good in their own skin. I also know there can be issues with being overweight.

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