Making a Lifestyle Change (or Plus Sized and OK with it)
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Because maybe she LIKES having a bigger, curvier body. Not everyone has to have the same beauty standard. Not everyone has to want to be thin.
I think that some of us are questioning because her goal isn't to be thin or beautiful. It's to be healthy. Being over-weight is not healthy. Being a healthy weight is healthy.Why is that anyone's business but hers?
Because she started a thread "throwing it out there".0 -
Being over-weight is not healthy.
Weight is only one factor in health. Being overweight can make one more susceptible to health problems, but it doesn't per say make a person unhealthy. I'm at a healthy weight and I have overweight friends who have better bloodwork numbers than I do, can run faster and further than I can, and can outperform me in any sport. Am I automatically healthier because I'm at a "healthy" weight and they're not? No. The whole overweight automatically equals unhealthy concept is outdated and incorrect.
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Weight is only one factor in health. Being overweight can make one more susceptible to health problems, but it doesn't per say make a person unhealthy. I'm at a healthy weight and I have overweight friends who have better bloodwork numbers than I do, can run faster and further than I can, and can outperform me in any sport. Am I automatically healthier because I'm at a "healthy" weight and they're not? No. The whole overweight automatically equals unhealthy concept is outdated and incorrect.
We agree that thin does not equal healthy, that's not what is being discussed here.
I also understand that some over-weight people can be healthier than they might otherwise be (eg. fitter or disease-free).
However, being over-weight has (poor) health implications. Diabetes, heart disease, joint problems as well as related to depression and less inclination to exercise.
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TheVirgoddess wrote: »No one said you have to be thin to be healthy. But if health is her ultimate goal, why stop at the bare minimum? That's the part I don't understand.
Because maybe she LIKES having a bigger, curvier body. Not everyone has to have the same beauty standard. Not everyone has to want to be thin. If she feels comfortable being bigger, and can improve her health at the same time, why is that a problem? Why is that anyone's business but hers?
Oh for crying out loud.
I never said she should have the goal of being thin. I never said that being thin was the answer. In fact, I said pretty much the opposite:TheVirgoddess wrote: »I don't think anyone should be forced to lose a certain amount of weight for any reason, and women should love themselves and their bodies no matter what. But your reasoning really confuses me.
If you're going to cite health as a reason to lose weight, then do it for health. If you just want to lose a few pounds, while remaining overweight, rock on. I do not (and never will) understand having a stopping point in mind when you're working on your health.
And it became my business when she posted about it on public forum. That's how it works.0 -
And PS - you don't have to be overweight to have curves.0
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TheVirgoddess wrote: »Oh for crying out loud.
I never said she should have the goal of being thin. I never said that being thin was the answer.
Sorry, I should have been more clear there. I wasn't trying to say that you specifically said she should want to be thin, that was more of a general statement. But you said you didn't understand her reasoning and my response to you was that maybe the reasoning is that she feels good, beautiful, in a bigger body.
Anyway, I have too much to do today to argue on an internet forum. My point here is that I think OP has a great attitude, and there's nothing wrong with her wanting to improve her health without getting a 100% fit, ultra healthy body. I also don't think it's appropriate for everyone to question why she doesn't want to push herself to her full potential or whatever. I understand she posted on a public forum, but I don't think she was asking for everyone to question her motives. I'm assuming she just wanted support, which is what I've been trying to provide.
Have a good day, all.0 -
CrmpetsNTea wrote: »Interesting, I haven't thought about this before. Why do you want to be over-weight but not as over-weight as you are now?
Congratulations on completing your first week!
Thank you for the congratulations!
I'm glad I gave you something to think about, but I am going to follow that up with a question or two: Why do I have to want to be thin in the first place? Why can't a fat girl like her body and want to be healthy without it being a contradiction? It's society's norm. I don't have to conform to a body image that doesn't make me happy. Losing the weight will make it less likely of me developing diabetes and lessen my risk of heart disease, among other things. I will be stronger, more flexible, and better able to do the things I want to do. YMMV!
just sounds like an excuse to be lazy.
That's like saying, just because people like having healthy teeth doesn't mean i need to brush. Yes my teeth will not look as nice, and slowly throughout my life my teeth will start to wear more and then eventually betray me. But i'm not conforming to society, what do they know, toothless with a weak purpose is much more important.-1 -
Congratulations on making through your first week! Any goal to be healthier is a great one. I started out with similar goals, just trying to be healthier but not really trying to get to a healthy weight. But when I hit my goal weight I felt so good that I just kept on going! I am now only 3lbs away from no longer being in the "overweight" category! I never dreamed I would make it this far. This may or may not happen to you. Best of luck in your journey to a healthier you!
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I understand your decision and respect it. Your choice.
Why get down to a healthy weight though? Because the stats support that the idea that if you are at a healthy weight then you are likely to live a longer and better life in health terms. Thats important enough for me to want and worth putting the effort in to achieve, You will of course get some benefit if you go some of the journey, but id prefer most of it.
You are talking about reducing your chances of many of todays most popular killers
Heart attacks, strokes, diabetes, brittle bones, arthritis, cancer. Look it up.
On the plus side there was a study which supported the idea that yo yo dieting is much worse than just staying at a constant weight. Iff to the gym now Illl poist it if I remember when I get back.0 -
Wow, I went away to have a healthy lunch and come back to a couple of PMs that there was a "sh@tstorm" happening in my introduction thread were not lying (thank you, lovely people for the warnings! xo)!
First off, thank you all for taking a moment to chime in. While I don't exactly feel welcomed, I think that this is a teaching moment for all those that think that I have to be free of my fat to be healthy and happy.
This is my journey, not yours. My fat is my business, not yours. You do NOT get to judge me. You know NOTHING about my life, history or motivations. I won't be bullied nor shamed into changing my goals to be more palatable to your worldview.
For those of you who have been very welcoming and messaged/friended me, thank you very much. I appreciate your genuine interest and kindness. I hope that we can all meet our goals together!
XO!
Tina0 -
TheVirgoddess wrote: »Oh for crying out loud.
I never said she should have the goal of being thin. I never said that being thin was the answer.
Sorry, I should have been more clear there. I wasn't trying to say that you specifically said she should want to be thin, that was more of a general statement. But you said you didn't understand her reasoning and my response to you was that maybe the reasoning is that she feels good, beautiful, in a bigger body.
Anyway, I have too much to do today to argue on an internet forum. My point here is that I think OP has a great attitude, and there's nothing wrong with her wanting to improve her health without getting a 100% fit, ultra healthy body. I also don't think it's appropriate for everyone to question why she doesn't want to push herself to her full potential or whatever. I understand she posted on a public forum, but I don't think she was asking for everyone to question her motives. I'm assuming she just wanted support, which is what I've been trying to provide.
Have a good day, all.
Okay, I understand a little better.
I think it's great that she loves her body, absolutely. And I don't think having an ultra healthy, fit body is for everyone, either. I'll never be thin, my happy weight is on the high side of normal. I just think the long term risks of choosing to stay overweight should matter. An overweight person can absolutely be healthy, but it will be harder to maintain that health over time.
I'm also not trying to argue. So I'll just leave it at that.0 -
OP, congratulations on finishing your first week! Keep at it!
Being fit & healthy is a great goal. Just remember that being overweight puts you at risk for things that can't necessarily be measured by bloodwork like diabetes can, but also for things like greater risk of complications during surgery (you never know if you might need surgery one day) and joint and back problems later in life.
That being said, just keep working towards your goal. Who knows, maybe once you get there you'll love how much better you feel and want to keep going. Lots of people run their first 5k then want to do a 10k, then a half marathon, then a marathon, why can't weight loss be the same way? And even if you don't want to keep going, you'll still be better off than where you are now!0 -
CrmpetsNTea wrote: »Wow, I went away to have a healthy lunch and come back to a couple of PMs that there was a "sh@tstorm" happening in my introduction thread were not lying (thank you, lovely people for the warnings! xo)!
First off, thank you all for taking a moment to chime in. While I don't exactly feel welcomed, I think that this is a teaching moment for all those that think that I have to be free of my fat to be healthy and happy.
This is my journey, not yours. My fat is my business, not yours. You do NOT get to judge me. You know NOTHING about my life, history or motivations. I won't be bullied nor shamed into changing my goals to be more palatable to your worldview.
For those of you who have been very welcoming and messaged/friended me, thank you very much. I appreciate your genuine interest and kindness. I hope that we can all meet our goals together!
XO!
Tina
No one has shamed, judged or bullied you though. No one said you have to be thin, or X size, or X weight. The only thing that was expressed was concern for your long term health (which you stated as your goal).
And if the above is what you took away from all this - well I feel sad for you.
Again, best of luck.0 -
I enjoy being plus size, I like the way my body looks.
But there is a limit, and I know I've passed it, hence MFP. I want to be confident AND healthy, and both of those things are possible while being overweight.
I'm at my heaviest weight ever, but I'm also the best cardiovascular fitness level I've ever been at. My blood work and blood pressure are perfect. If that's not healthy, I don't know what is.
Good luck on your journey! And congrats on setting goals and not allowing society to tell you they're not good enough! 0 -
I'm sorry you thought that your thread got too heated and that you didn't actually want a discussion. I'm very sorry you feel shamed or attacked or told that you need to be thin. That is not my reading of the discussion.
Best of luck on the rest of your journey!0 -
I believe in a broad definition of health - not just physical health but mental, spiritual, social, etc. So each of us is on our journey to maximize health broadly. Trying to achieve perfect physical health is not always the top priority in the balance of health. It is quite possible to be plus-sized and really on track with health in a broad sense. I also believe in some degree of natural variation in size such that being "overweight" is not universally unhealthy (in fact, the BMI category of overweight predicts longevity). It really depends on the person. I do think an arbitrary weight loss goal also fails to capture the ongoing journey that makes up a commitment to health and well-being.0
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"just sounds like an excuse to be lazy."
"That's like saying, just because people like having healthy teeth doesn't mean i need to brush. Yes my teeth will not look as nice, and slowly throughout my life my teeth will start to wear more and then eventually betray me. But i'm not conforming to society, what do they know, toothless with a weak purpose is much more important. "
That sure sounded like shaming, an attack, and a judgement to me. There was some genuine discussion, but several comments about how she wasn't giving 100%, which kinda shuts down any discussion she might have wanted to start, at least with those people.0 -
I have lost 68 pounds this year and intend to lose more. Why? Because being as heavy as I was I didn't have the energy I wanted and my blood sugars were too high. I also wanted to look leaner in my clothes. Having said that, I understand why you only want to go so far in your weight loss. That is the weight you have decided to work towards and it's commendable. I wonder how much effort it will take me to get to my goal, about 20-30 pounds away. I am definitely more active than I have ever been, and I like being active. I feel energized. But I won't be so driven about it that I can't enjoy the other parts of my life. I assume you feel the same about that balance. I used to identify myself as being plus sized but I didn't particularly like that term. Now I am just me. Yes, sometimes I still have to buy plus sized clothes. My goal is to be a size 14, because that is the size that I will probably be when I get rid of most of my stomach fat. Right now I'm between a size 16 and 18. I'm not aiming for an Olympic body, just my optimum body for myself. Enjoy your journey - it's so worthwhile!!!0
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Am I right in thinking that "plus-size" means over-weight?
Tea I don't think that this has to do with self-confidence / self-acceptance. You talk about health being your motivation in your first post. By definition being over-weight is not healthy, so I'm not sure why you'd stop at an unhealthy weight.
You ask me to consider the question yourself, but I haven't lost weight to be thin. I was 11st 11lb at my highest, I lost weight to be healthy.
"Plus size" MAY equal overweight, but that's the thing--- the term "plus size" is subjective!! But if we are to argue, as I am, that an overweight person can be fit and healthy, then a plus sized person can absolutely be fit and healthy.
By definition, over-weight is "above a weight considered normal or desirable". And here's the definition of normal--- "conforming to a standard". Do I need to keep going?
Society has decided what is "over-weight" and "plus sized". But physiologically, a female with a 35 inch waist and considered overweight by the norm, can absolutely maintain the same health and fitness level of a smaller woman.
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Ya think this is a shitstorm.. You don't internet much huh? 0
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