Making a Lifestyle Change (or Plus Sized and OK with it)
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OP, I applaud your attitude of nonconformity and defying social norms. I do wonder, however, at a goal of being healthier without being healthy, if that makes sense. To improve your health and fitness level is great, but to intentionally stop short of optimizing your health to the best of your ability is baffling to me.
This has nothing at all to do with size or being thin, it has to do with simple statistics, health markers and basic science. A healthy weight doesn't have to be thin, and there are many ways to maintain and express your autonomy and individuality without sacrificing your long term health.0 -
You will still be unhealthy and at risk for various diseases. It doesn't matter if you eat well and exercise. Any access weight you carry will negatively impact your health. If you're willing to put in the work to lose 55 pounds, why not go the whole way and get into a healthy weight? Why stop?0
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I don't understand peoples stance on this. Sure, optimal bodyweight/body fat is best for health, but how many of us do everything in life for optimal health?
Not drinking alcohol ever is best for health but people who hop into moderate drinking threads on here and say the OP should give it up generally get shouted down.
While science is uncertain (as it often is) about whether processed food causes health issues, if you were concerned to be in 'optimal' health, you'd probably avoid all processed foods but that is generally shouted down too.
There are a myriad of things that people do every single day that aren't *optimal* for health - but we do them because we enjoy them, can't avoid them easily or don't care for them... but if someone came on to MFP telling everyone to do or avoid each and every one of them, they would get laughed out.
So why is it such an offence that the OP is happy to be healthiER rather than 100% optimally healthy?0 -
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Because her goal is to not get diabetes or any of the other things her doctor warned her about. So her plan is to reduce those chances, but intentionally not eliminate them?0
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Skinny people get diabetes too. I think lowering (not eliminating) her chances of complications is an admirable goal. Who knows? She could get close to her target and set a new goal, depending on how she feels.0
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SnuggleSmacks wrote: »Because her goal is to not get diabetes or any of the other things her doctor warned her about. So her plan is to reduce those chances, but intentionally not eliminate them?
This, the only reason I posted anything was out of genuine concern. It wasn't to bash, humiliate or degrade her. Just trying to give a different perspective.
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Why are people concern trolling? An adult can make up her own mind about her own body, whether others approve, or understand, or not. This really burns my biscuits.
Her argument is, "I am going to get somewhat healthy and lower my risk of disease, but I don't want to be completely healthy and eliminate the risk of disease."
I just don't get the logic and am trying to understand.0 -
It can be incredibly hard and intimidating to start losing weight. Plans can be derailed, challenges pop up, and real life gets in the way. Your perspective on yourself drastically changes once you start losing weight. Suddenly you can move more (and breathe while doing it) and you realize that while it's not exactly easy, it's not that hard either. Goals change.
I think it's awesome that you are working on a better you. Good luck reaching your goals.
All of them
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uconnwinsnc1 wrote: »Her argument is, "I am going to get somewhat healthy and lower my risk of disease, but I don't want to be completely healthy and eliminate the risk of disease."
I just don't get the logic and am trying to understand.
Well, you can't eliminate the risk of disease.
She's working with her doctor, and to the extent they decide there's reason to be concerned after losing to her current goal, I'm sure she could decide to lose more.
But it's clearly a risk to be extremely overweight, so to the extent that you think you are at a risky level (or are feeling health effects) it's good to improve things by losing some weight, even if you don't feel interested in what may seem an overwhelming process of trying to get to some weight that's never been you, vs. one where you know you were healthy and active and felt good. Plus, the risk from being a BMI of, say, 26 vs. 24 is at least debatable from what I've seen. Your goal and what you decide is a healthy place for you certainly can be a personal decision based on such things as where you are holding the fat, test results, etc.
I don't get the need to discourage her or pass judgment on her based on her goals. We don't even know what she means by "plus sized."0 -
There is a definition of "plus size" starting at a size 14 or 16, which for 99% of women would be overweight, if not obese (I was obese at a size 16, and I'm 5'8"). By remaining this weight, she is continuing to put herself at a much higher risk for diabetes, a heart attack, etc, not the mention the damage to joints and knees. So her health improves slightly, but not enough. Why would you want to put yourself at a higher risk for devastating diseases?0
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lemurcat12 wrote: »uconnwinsnc1 wrote: »Her argument is, "I am going to get somewhat healthy and lower my risk of disease, but I don't want to be completely healthy and eliminate the risk of disease."
I just don't get the logic and am trying to understand.
Well, you can't eliminate the risk of disease.
She's working with her doctor, and to the extent they decide there's reason to be concerned after losing to her current goal, I'm sure she could decide to lose more.
But it's clearly a risk to be extremely overweight, so to the extent that you think you are at a risky level (or are feeling health effects) it's good to improve things by losing some weight, even if you don't feel interested in what may seem an overwhelming process of trying to get to some weight that's never been you, vs. one where you know you were healthy and active and felt good. Plus, the risk from being a BMI of, say, 26 vs. 24 is at least debatable from what I've seen. Your goal and what you decide is a healthy place for you certainly can be a personal decision based on such things as where you are holding the fat, test results, etc.
Very true.
In fact, from my own experience: I was diagnosed with pre-diabetes. I had a wake up call and committed to losing some of that weight. I lost 43 pounds and turned it completely around. Still way overweight, but no longer pre-diabetic and therefore much healthier. I could have stopped but my goals changed. I'm not done
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Your goals and objectives are yours, and only yours, to make and keep. Don't let anyone dictate what you should or shouldn't do. People can ask, suggest, encourage and, most importantly, keep you in line with your goals (at least for me it's most important). Nobody has the right to disagree with your goals.
That being said, I would like to give you my experience in setting my long term goals. I started MFP weighing 310 pounds (5'11"). I've been overweight my whole life but had gained some more weight over the last few years. I always knew I needed to lose weight. But I considered myself a "big boned" person and thought my ultimate weight should be around 235 - 245. And I was perfectly fine with that.
When I started losing weight I decided to not focus on the long term goal but rather just start with what I thought was the goal for the next 9 months. Once I started losing, I started adjusting my goals based on how fast I ended up losing weight.
At this point, having lost over 100 pounds, I finally realize that my ultimate weight is somewhere around 200 pounds. I never would have dreamed that I would physically be able to get my weight down to this level. Not only was I able to do it in just over 1 year (with being on maintenance during the summer months), but I had a lot of fun doing it. Yes, the beginning was difficult. But once I learned how, when, what and how much to eat, the process became just another part of life. I also adopted an active lifestyle and started running and biking.
Bottom line:
Don't take crap from anyone
Do be open to questions and suggestions
Don't focus too much on the long term goal
Do take it one step at a time. It takes a while to learn what works for you.
Feel free to PM me if you have any specific questions.
I really want to echo this.
I started at more than 300 pounds (5'11"). I thought I'd try to lose 20 pounds, because even that would be better than where I started. Does the fact that I didn't start this process with the intention of reaching a healthy weight mean I wasn't dedicated, was only willing to go half-way? No - because ANY weight loss would mean health benefits, and my goal was to be healthier and happier.
Once I lost my 20, I wanted to get below 250. Then I wanted to get under 225, then under 200, and I finally settled in where I am now: 175-180 pounds. I never, ever, ever dreamed I would hit this weight.
That means that on a good day, my BMI is in the healthy range. On another day, I am overweight. I sometimes think about losing another 10-15 pounds to get to a "healthier" weight but eh.
I'm so much healthier and happier than where I was before. I have a wardrobe of clothes that fit. This weight enables me to do all those things I wanted to do - run, hike, climb, keep up with anything. And I've been maintaining this 130 pound weight loss for more than two years, with no major effort required (I just continue the habits I developed while losing).
Yep, I could lose a few more pounds. But it wouldn't make me any happier, and it wouldn't make me any healthier.
So OP, your goal is perfectly fine. The health benefits of losing 55 pounds will be enormous. Maybe when you get there, you'll find that you could lose more and be happy. Maybe you'll be happy where you are. Regardless, you'll be better off than you are now.
My mantra in all of this has been "live the healthiest life you can enjoy" - written by Dr. Yoni Freedhoff. He recommends that people strive not to be perfect, but to live HEALTHIER lives that they can maintain forever. Living this advice means that sometimes I eat the cake, and sometimes I don't. Most of the time I work out, but sometimes I choose something else. I am not perfect, and sure - I could eat better and be more devoted to the gym and strive for an ideal I won't ever reach.
Or I can develop realistic habits that will sustain a body weight that maybe isn't as low as I could get it, maybe isn't as healthy as it could be, but I get to enjoy my life, stress less about maintenance, and frankly - be pretty damn happy. I choose that.
Losing 55 pounds is a great goal, OP, and it will improve your health (and probably your life as a whole, if you're anything like me). Best of luck as you achieve it.0 -
I think having read all 5 pages this seems a pretty emotive subject. Everyone has their idea of what makes an attractive body.
For me I want to rock the lean muscle look. Im hoping for maybe 15-25% body fat and to have back the definition I used to have in my legs and shoulders, Ive accepted I will inevitably have some loose skin particularly in my abdo but if I can wear vest tops without worrying about my bingo wings I wont mind as I am never planning on wearing a bikini anyway.
My sister on the other hand, she wants skinny as she thinks muscles aren't feminine. I have my own disagreement with that particular assertion but whatever, its her body image not mine.
So OP likes plus size curves. And I am working on the assumption plus size for her is not like 10lb overweight but more like a UK 14-20? (sorry i dont know US sizes). Actually OP it would be interesting to know what size roughly you would like to end up? If you dont mind sharing. Well fair enough if thats what she likes then thats all that really matters. Losing the 55lb will drop a lot of health risks. I am 42lb down and my joints are happier, I am hoping my yearly diabetes test wont be borderline next year though I am fighting genetics there, my chest and breathing is improved. Generally I am much better. For some people this is enough. 55lb will definitely make a huge dent in health risks so for the people saying why bother - well thats why.
I guess Im saying the way you want to end up looking isnt for me but it obviously is for you so good luck on your journey0 -
First of all look up the definition of "thin". Thin used to mean underweight. Nowadays people confuse that word with being within a normal weight range. Secondly science is on the side of being within a normal weight range. You are less likely to develop various diseases and medical conditions within a normal weight range. In a strictly bio-mechanical sense your body will work better so movement will be easier and more comfortable. You won't get tired as easily. I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome so I am always tired and have to budget my energy very carefully. I lost 15 pounds this year and have more energy. It's even easier to breathe. Maybe a healthy person wouldn't notice that but I sure as hell did.
Normal weight is not how about how you look, it's about how well your body functions and how much you reduce your risk for disease and early death. These things are and have been measured and reported on for decades by many many scientists. It's not about societal expectations, it's about your body's response to its own composition. Your body doesn't give a *kitten* about what's fashionable, it's going to respond to what you put in it and what you do with it. Reelz not feelz.
I used to hear similar things from smokers, "Oh I know somebody who smokes and they don't have cancer". Not yet. "Not everybody gets cancer". True, but the odds go way up. Not every overweight person will suffer from heart disease, diabetes, cancer, etc... But disportionately more overweight people than normal weight people will suffer. There are exceptions to every rule but betting that you'll be the exception is not a good bet.0 -
Personally, I don't even own a scale. I just plan on eating healthy (-er than I was) and exercising consistently. If I need a whole wardrobe after doing that for awhile, that would be awesome.0
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To the OP...Congrat's on your first week!! Keep up the great work! Do what's good for you and your health!!0
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uconnwinsnc1 wrote: »Why are people concern trolling? An adult can make up her own mind about her own body, whether others approve, or understand, or not. This really burns my biscuits.
Her argument is, "I am going to get somewhat healthy and lower my risk of disease, but I don't want to be completely healthy and eliminate the risk of disease."
I just don't get the logic and am trying to understand.
I would like to learn to play piano. I do not want to dedicate my life to becoming a virtuoso.
I would like to take some programming classes. I do not want to get an advanced degree in computing.
I would like to take up jogging. I don't want to run a marathon.
In all honesty, it seems more like you want to judge than to understand.
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ShannonMpls wrote: »I really want to echo this.
I started at more than 300 pounds (5'11"). I thought I'd try to lose 20 pounds, because even that would be better than where I started. Does the fact that I didn't start this process with the intention of reaching a healthy weight mean I wasn't dedicated, was only willing to go half-way? No - because ANY weight loss would mean health benefits, and my goal was to be healthier and happier.
Once I lost my 20, I wanted to get below 250. Then I wanted to get under 225, then under 200, and I finally settled in where I am now: 175-180 pounds. I never, ever, ever dreamed I would hit this weight.
Yes to the whole post, but I want to focus in on this bit.
I was kind of lucky when I started this time, because even though I'd regained (plus) a bunch of weight, I'd lost weight once before and kept it off for several years, so I knew that I could reasonably aspire to be a lower weight and that I felt good at it. (I also only started gaining weight in my late 20s, so it didn't seem weird to imagine myself in the normal BMI range, for example, or a size 6.)
But still, when I started losing weight the first time, having never dieted or really seriously made an effort to change my body at all, I emotionally did not believe that I could lose weight, and certainly not that I could change my body dramatically. So I told myself that I would try to lose weight and get fitter, and if worse came to worse (which is what I secretly believed would be the case) at least I'd know I was fit and eating well. That's what I needed to get started and to steel myself to deal with the fear of stepping on that scale and the possibility that it wouldn't move.
I'm not saying the OP is the same, since I really did want to get back to the weight I was in my early 20s (and I ended up getting a lot more fit in a number of ways), but what people want shifts as this process goes on often enough that I see zero reason to give her a hard time even if you think she's wrong. (Even apart from it not being anyone's business.)0 -
Think about what you are saying, people! "Why do something halfway to reduce your chance of disease?" Well, have you ever decided to "cut back" on sugar, trans fat, or any other unhealthy food? How about an unhealthy behavior? Have you ever decided to get more sleep or reduce your stress level for your health? Did you set your goal to do it all the way, perfectly? Do you now eat ZERO sugar and get 8 hours of sleep EVERY NIGHT? Of course not. This cool chick has the foresight to set SMART, REALISTIC goals that will greatly reduce her risk of disease, and that make her feel good about herself. You, who criticize her will probably struggle with weight and self-esteem issues your entire life. You will likely be yo-yo dieters. Oh, and I am basing that FACT on weight loss research.-3
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I started at 340 lbs - my original goal was to lose some weight to get healthier - I was diabetic and starting to have back pains from carrying the extra weight around. I would have been thrilled to end up at 199 (which would have put me just out of the plus sizes @ a size 14-16 US and into the famed onderland) It would have left me still overweight by BMI but I would have been OK with that. As it worked out when I got there, my goals changed and I kept going and lost around 200 lbs total so I am now in the 140's with a healthy "normal" BMI - if the OP wants to start losing weight and be healthier, any starting goal should be fine - the fact is, she is doing something - if she decides to stop or keep going, that is really up to her. So OP, congratulations on working towards getting healthier - no matter what your ultimate goal is.0
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if you have a significant amount of belly fat, you likely have a significant amount of visceral fat, which is, as far as i've read, one of the most dangerous things about being overweight. this fat can be invisible - even skinny sedentary people can have visceral fat!
i thought i wanted to be healthy but still "plus sized" at first, too, but what i have learned since then tells me that it's an oxymoron. if you're not one of those lucky ladies who carries extra fat primarily in her chest and butt, then you probably won't be healthy at a "plus size".
it's great to set a goal you think is attainable and reasonable for you and i fully believe that you have every right to be comfortable in your own skin however you want to be. however, if health is your goal i advise thoroughly researching visceral fat and being honest with yourself about your expectations, and what they will (and won't) do for your level of risk.0 -
you can't say things like 'probably' and 'likely' and then call it 'fact'. that's a massive contradiction. fact either is or isn't, and can be repeatedly proven so.1mountainmama wrote: »You, who criticize her will probably struggle with weight and self-esteem issues your entire life. You will likely be yo-yo dieters. Oh, and I am basing that FACT on weight loss research.
a health coach/dietitian that misuses the term 'fact' is actually kind of an alarming thought.0 -
I went from a size 18/20w to 2/4 petite, smaller than I have ever been as an adult, but still considered 'overweight'! That number on the scale is deceiving, only you know where you will be the happiest. I also totally understand the frustration from reading some of the forums, I would not look good being under 120 pounds based on my height, given my body shape and genetic makeup! Pick your goal, still read the forums - they help keep the motivation up but still be true to yourself. You will do great!!!
Wait, what?! You are still considered "overweight" at a size 2-4??? How is that possible? I am at 2/4 and am at 19-20 BMI. How odd the BMI scale is!
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lemurcat12 wrote: »
+2 I don't understand. A person has a right to decide what their goals are and where they feel best.
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bmi doesn't take muscle mass into account. muscle is denser than fat, thereby a muscular person will weigh more but also be smaller.I went from a size 18/20w to 2/4 petite, smaller than I have ever been as an adult, but still considered 'overweight'! That number on the scale is deceiving, only you know where you will be the happiest. I also totally understand the frustration from reading some of the forums, I would not look good being under 120 pounds based on my height, given my body shape and genetic makeup! Pick your goal, still read the forums - they help keep the motivation up but still be true to yourself. You will do great!!!
Wait, what?! You are still considered "overweight" at a size 2-4??? How is that possible? I am at 2/4 and am at 19-20 BMI. How odd the BMI scale is!0 -
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bmi doesn't take muscle mass into account. muscle is denser than fat, thereby a muscular person will weigh more but also be smaller.I went from a size 18/20w to 2/4 petite, smaller than I have ever been as an adult, but still considered 'overweight'! That number on the scale is deceiving, only you know where you will be the happiest. I also totally understand the frustration from reading some of the forums, I would not look good being under 120 pounds based on my height, given my body shape and genetic makeup! Pick your goal, still read the forums - they help keep the motivation up but still be true to yourself. You will do great!!!
Wait, what?! You are still considered "overweight" at a size 2-4??? How is that possible? I am at 2/4 and am at 19-20 BMI. How odd the BMI scale is!
In addition to muscle mass, people of African descent have higher bone mineral density than other races. The commonly used height-weight charts have not been revised since 1983 and (my assumption based on the lack of parity in medical trials at the time) may not have accurately sampled non-whites.
She's telling the truth when she says she's overweight but 2/4, but only because the ideal weight charts don't seem to reflect non-white communities. (Many Asian and indigenous Americans have lighter bone mineral density.)
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