"You can have just one!"

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  • Alidecker
    Alidecker Posts: 1,262 Member
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    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    It used to bug me when people would ask "how did you lose the weight"--I'd typically say "the usual, exercise, eat less," but increasingly I'm realizing that the people who are pushiest about this question usually are interested in losing too, which has made me more tolerant and willing to talk about it in more detail.

    I am happy to help people with this and answer truthfully, but when it annoyed me was when I would say I exercise more and eat less and they would completely lose interest. They were generally hoping that I would give them some answer that was a magic pill.

    Mostly, I don't worry about any of it. I've been at this for over 5 years and it's my life.

  • JoanaMHill
    JoanaMHill Posts: 265 Member
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    Leenda62 wrote: »
    "well that is fine I guess but I want to ENJOY my life."

    I'm focusing on becoming a walker/runner. I'm sure going to enjoy life when I can walk the mile to work and you're huffing and puffing going the twelve feet to your car. /bitter
  • TimothyFish
    TimothyFish Posts: 4,925 Member
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    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.
  • JoanaMHill
    JoanaMHill Posts: 265 Member
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    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.

    There's a difference between going to someone's house when you know they're preparing a meal for you and being assaulted with chocolate chip cookies and brownies at your work desk. (assaulting being a little over-dramatic, but you get my point)

  • palwithme
    palwithme Posts: 860 Member
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    "Damn, girl. How much did you weigh before?"

    Bwahahah....yeah, this always gets me too!
  • SingRunTing
    SingRunTing Posts: 2,604 Member
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    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.

    See that's not really the issue for me. I eat what is prepared, just at reasonable portion sizes. Food pushers (like my MIL) aren't happy unless you are eating a mountain sized plate of what's prepared.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.

    There's a difference between going to someone's house when you know they're preparing a meal for you and being assaulted with chocolate chip cookies and brownies at your work desk. (assaulting being a little over-dramatic, but you get my point)

    This. I eat what is prepared for me.
  • palwithme
    palwithme Posts: 860 Member
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    For a lot of people food = love. If you reject their food, they take it personally.
  • palwithme
    palwithme Posts: 860 Member
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    My MIL and FIL saying "You look great! I am so happy for you! But, keep going. You still have a way to go." Ha Ha.
  • sheldonklein
    sheldonklein Posts: 854 Member
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    Frankly, the majority of these seem innocuous and well-intentioned. Are people required to ignore your weight loss? Is it really that hard to say, "I can, but I'd rather not" when someone urges you to try just one cookie?
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,150 Member
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    palwithme wrote: »
    My MIL and FIL saying "You look great! I am so happy for you! But, keep going. You still have a way to go." Ha Ha.

    AND your response should be "Yes, isn't it wonderful? When are you two going to start"?
    Chair-face action!
  • JoanaMHill
    JoanaMHill Posts: 265 Member
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    Frankly, the majority of these seem innocuous and well-intentioned. Are people required to ignore your weight loss? Is it really that hard to say, "I can, but I'd rather not" when someone urges you to try just one cookie?

    It's not saying it that's hard (for most people) it's getting the person with the food to accept it. We live in a culture where politeness is expected, and accepting offered gifts (food counts) is considered polite. Politely saying no is still seen as a snub (and taken personally) even if it's just that they want to save those calories for something they were expecting to enjoy later.
  • TimothyFish
    TimothyFish Posts: 4,925 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.

    There's a difference between going to someone's house when you know they're preparing a meal for you and being assaulted with chocolate chip cookies and brownies at your work desk. (assaulting being a little over-dramatic, but you get my point)

    Not really. We know people are going to do that at work or we wouldn't be complaining about it. Most of us have a meal we eat after work, so all we really need to do is eat less during that meal or even skip it on days food is offered to us at work.
  • JoanaMHill
    JoanaMHill Posts: 265 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.

    There's a difference between going to someone's house when you know they're preparing a meal for you and being assaulted with chocolate chip cookies and brownies at your work desk. (assaulting being a little over-dramatic, but you get my point)

    Not really. We know people are going to do that at work or we wouldn't be complaining about it. Most of us have a meal we eat after work, so all we really need to do is eat less during that meal or even skip it on days food is offered to us at work.

    There is absolutely no reason we should have to eat something just because people tell us to. And there is absolutely no reason we should have to eat less of something we actually want in order to enjoy it. If the people mentioning these instances actually wanted the treat, they'd eat it. But they don't. And that's the problem.
  • SingRunTing
    SingRunTing Posts: 2,604 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Keep in mind that it is just as frustrating to them that you don't eat what they prepared. Rather than refuse to eat it, it might be better to prepare for the encounter by budgeting it into your diet.

    There's a difference between going to someone's house when you know they're preparing a meal for you and being assaulted with chocolate chip cookies and brownies at your work desk. (assaulting being a little over-dramatic, but you get my point)

    Not really. We know people are going to do that at work or we wouldn't be complaining about it. Most of us have a meal we eat after work, so all we really need to do is eat less during that meal or even skip it on days food is offered to us at work.

    Are you seriously suggesting that I should eat a brownie and then skip supper so that I don't offend someone's delicate sensibilities?
  • sheldonklein
    sheldonklein Posts: 854 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Frankly, the majority of these seem innocuous and well-intentioned. Are people required to ignore your weight loss? Is it really that hard to say, "I can, but I'd rather not" when someone urges you to try just one cookie?

    It's not saying it that's hard (for most people) it's getting the person with the food to accept it. We live in a culture where politeness is expected, and accepting offered gifts (food counts) is considered polite. Politely saying no is still seen as a snub (and taken personally) even if it's just that they want to save those calories for something they were expecting to enjoy later.

    So the offeror must refrain from the polite thing of offering food because a dieter might be forced to say no thank you?
  • DeterminedFee201426
    DeterminedFee201426 Posts: 859 Member
    edited December 2014
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    dont lose anymore weight!!! dont go lower than that, you will blow in the wind, look at you your too skinny already,when you get up in age you'll realize how much time you wasted in life counting calories and exerciseing, you dont need to workout! your already skinny
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Frankly, the majority of these seem innocuous and well-intentioned. Are people required to ignore your weight loss? Is it really that hard to say, "I can, but I'd rather not" when someone urges you to try just one cookie?

    It's not saying it that's hard (for most people) it's getting the person with the food to accept it. We live in a culture where politeness is expected, and accepting offered gifts (food counts) is considered polite. Politely saying no is still seen as a snub (and taken personally) even if it's just that they want to save those calories for something they were expecting to enjoy later.

    So the offeror must refrain from the polite thing of offering food because a dieter might be forced to say no thank you?

    You're not getting it. Of course they can offer food, and we can politely say no-but we are talking about people who don't take your polite no as an answer and push the food on you anyway. I think you missed something. We are talking about food pushers.
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
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    "i thought you were on a diet, what's with the _____?"

    math. that is what's with the _____. now mind your own damn business.
  • SingRunTing
    SingRunTing Posts: 2,604 Member
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    JoanaMHill wrote: »
    Frankly, the majority of these seem innocuous and well-intentioned. Are people required to ignore your weight loss? Is it really that hard to say, "I can, but I'd rather not" when someone urges you to try just one cookie?

    It's not saying it that's hard (for most people) it's getting the person with the food to accept it. We live in a culture where politeness is expected, and accepting offered gifts (food counts) is considered polite. Politely saying no is still seen as a snub (and taken personally) even if it's just that they want to save those calories for something they were expecting to enjoy later.

    So the offeror must refrain from the polite thing of offering food because a dieter might be forced to say no thank you?

    That's not what was said.

    They said that the offeror can offer, but should accept an answer of "no, thank you".

    The whole point of the phrase "no, thank you" is to politely decline an offer. But people seem to get offended by that simple phrase for no reason.