For the first time ever I wore a bikini to a friends pool party (NSV).

I am just a teen and a friends pool party was coming up, I've been wearing the same tankini for 5 years, under the same rash vest and board shorts. But I found a cute bikini when I was at the store, it was expensive, but I decided I deserved it, especially since I'd gotten so much wear out of the other pair.

I've lost 25 ibs so far, but still feel I have 20-25 ibs to go, however, I have lost a majority of the weight on my stomach first. I wasn't too sure if I was going to wear the bikini without a rash vest (although I knew I'd wear it with board shorts) the night before I decided, I'm going to wear the rash vest because it's not just me and the girls, there are some guys there too.

So fast forward to today, I'm in my friends room getting changed, I've got my board shorts and my bikini on and I'm about to reach for the tank top I'm going to use as a makeshift rash vest, but then I hesitate. I shake my head and chuck the tank top on, but my hands reach for the hem and lift it back up so I can look at my bikini top. 'It really is cute,' I think to myself. I look up and my friend who is also getting changed is looking at me. "I don't know whether I want to wear the tank top or not." she's already in her bikini and she smiles, "You look cute in the bikini, but do whatever you feel comfortable in." I push the tank top back down, but then push it back up again. "There'll be guys there." I say. My friend looks up "they're your friends too." I pause, she's right, the boys there are all very sweet guys, lovely people, they would never dream of making negative comments about my body like that.

I rip off the tank top all at once and my brain shuts off as I grab my towel and follow my friend out, holding the rolled up towel to my chest. I walk through the pool gate, inhale quickly and push away my cover, hanging the towel over the fence and quickly jumping into the pool.

For the first half hour or so, I kept my body submerged, but eventually I noticed the waterline lowering, past my bust (or maybe I was just standing taller) and suddenly I was getting out of the pool and, walking slowly and confidently, to jump off the edge and into the pool, because dammit that was always one of my favourite things to do in the pool!

As time went on I grew more comfortable and just stopped caring about worrying how I looked in my bikini, because nobody but me cared, and there was nothing to be self concious about, I have a good torso, and regardless bodies come in all different shapes and sizes.

To some people maybe this isn't such big victory, but to me, a person who has always been shy, especially about my body and could never fathom wearing a bikini before, this is a big leap forward.
I can finally wear a bikini and think I look cute in it without being self concious about my size.
So this was just a really big (to me) NSV I wanted to share