beginning running.... how do you get past the embarrasment?
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missemmibelle wrote: »When I pass someone walking or running in my car... I'm thinking "Damn, I wish I had the motivation!"
My daughter and I got lots of attention from a walk this summer. While we were at it, we were picking up discarded bottles and litter along the route. We got honks and waves. With some discussion we decided the people were cheering us on.
Running with my group at the Running Room was a big boost. They were so helpful and supportive. I learned from them that runners everywhere look out for each other. Don't be surprised if a fellow runner gives you a wave one of these days.
I have been so consistent running in my neighbourhood, I'm sure I am picking up some "Damn, I wish" vibes from my neighbours. My son-in-law gave me a high-five as I passed at the bus stop.
At this point I have enough success under my belt that I'm going for it no matter what.
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Now, there are haters out there.
http://www.blisstree.com/2012/08/03/fitness/triathlete-gets-fat-shamed-becomes-even-more-inspiring-937/
It takes a special kind of determination to keep on going.0 -
I can understand your embarrassment because I have the same thoughts creep in my head when I am jogging and a car drives by. I started C25K as well. Keep going, screw the little voice in your head and focus on breathing, put on your headphones and jam out, think of your form, most importantly, tell yourself how awesome you are for challenging yourself!
The people driving by are most of the time too consumed in whatever they have going on to even notice you. If some jerk off has to take the time out of their day to think or say something negative about you then they are a miserable person and probably hate their life so much they need to put others down.
I jog early in the morning, it's still dark out, less people up, less cars driving by, and people are probably still half asleep to notice me. I like to wear a baseball cap too. I run in the dark, but I do not wear dark clothing because I don't want to be invisible where someone may run me over. Reflectors or bright colors.
Since being on my own fitness journey I notice people running and no matter who they are/shape/size/age I am inspired. "If they can, I can" is what I think.
Good luck on your journey!0 -
Honey, THEY are in cars... Probably going to McDonalds for a 2,000 calorie meal. They are in no position to be laughing at you or judging you. You should be laughing at them. When you start feeling like this, remember that you're going to look amazing and WAY more fit than the fat slugs in the cars driving by you!
Way to go girl! Just keep swimming!0 -
I always have admired people that are taking action to lose weight or get healthy. I must admit that I had the same fear when I started, a guy with a fifty pound beer gut. At age 52 after one of my kids asked "when is it due" I had enough. I knew while running I couldn't cover up my belly but decided I must get started. Between Fit Bit, Aria scale, diet change, this site (MFP) and running I did it. It was so dramatic that I have had customers that knew me well mistake me for a new employee. Forget the morons out there and be proud that your taking action. You will enjoy the results.0
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My first thought upon seeing a fat person run is "good for them". My first thought upon seeing a fit person run is "damn. they look good. I hope I look that good one day" haha.
What do you think about when you see a heavy person run?
Have fun running! And if your embarassment detracts from your enjoyment of the workout, consider going for evening runs (like 8pm, when it's dark, which is what my roommate did) or going to the gym at not-peak hours (like 4am on a Saturday) to sort of get more comfortable with the environment and your routine.
When I was heavier, I was a bit blatantly in-your-face about my heaviness (as you can see from the pics). I tucked my shirt into my pants (because I was more worried about it bouncing up and showing my stomach). I wore two pairs or shorts (because the first pair rode up) as opposed to pants and I wore tank tops when it was hot- with my awesomely flabby and pale arms on display. I told myself that if people were going to laugh at me at least I could control what they were laughing at. My (now ex) boyfriend was embarrassed by the shirt-tucking, but the more comfortable you get with running, the easier it is to say "*kitten* it" and do your own thing. Keep trying! Don't give up!
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Someone said "you can't help how you're wired" and I have to disagree with that. The mind is extremely dynamic and we can change a huge bunch of thought patterns. While it is nice that many offer more consolation type of support, my earlier comments were posted with the purpose to dig deeper to see patterns of behaviour in an attempt to eventually grow as a person.
It is true that feelings are what they are and we can't change them simply because we decide to so. But from self-reflection and understanding change can grow. It is evident from several replies that such a process has happened, perhaps not consciously in each case, but still.0 -
It was seeing an overweight person run that inspired me to start C25K. Someone is thanking you right now for being an inspiration.0
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When you're driving and you see someone running, what do you think? Personally, I think "that's what I should be doing!" no matter what size the person is. If I even think anything at all. As many people on this said, most drivers are just going about their business and won't even notice.
That said, I get self conscious when I'm running outside on the road as well. I prefer being on the bike path near my house. There's something about being passed by other runners, even when they're clearly more athletic than I am, that I prefer over being passed by cars, and I can't explain why! So maybe that feeling won't totally disappear, but you'll get used to it and realize that getting out there is more important than what anyone else thinks!0 -
SallyLithgow wrote: »I couldn't get past the fact that people would be laughing at the fat girl trying to run. I know I shouldn't let it bother me, but it made me get to the point I thought I was going to cry with embarrassment and I quit. So for those that have been running for a while, how did you get past that initial embarrassment?
I was called fatboy by people in passing cars. I kept running. Now I run marathons and lost over 80 pounds.
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Contrary to pupular belief- this isn't about you- and not everyone spends their days laughing at you- why? because we are all just as selfish as you are- which means we are thinking about yourselves.
not you.
stop over thinking it and go run.0 -
jdscrubs32 wrote: »rrowdiness wrote: »Hey some quick solutions
- Wear army surplus camo, it's designed to make it harder for people to see you.
- Run at night; be sure to wear pure black from head to toe, wraparound sunglasses and a hat for that additional anonymity
- Find places where there are no other people, and run there. You know, middle of the woods at midnight, that kinda stuff.
- Consult this video. Specifically at 1:02. This is all that matters about running.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aN7lt0CYwHg - Stop worrying about what other people are thinking about you. They're not. They're thinking about them.
Run at night and wear pitch black clothing!!!! Recipe for getting knocked down that and getting injured. Poster who asked initial question ignore this.
pretty sure you missed the point. best comment. awesome video.
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Just another person who started running in public at 320 lbs+ here. Yeah, I guess it can feel embarrassing, but I'm over it. The way I see it, I'm doing something good for myself and it is totally FOR MYSELF. Everyone else can really suck it as far as I'm concerned, especially the "haters" and "jokers" who obviously don't have a life if they get their jollies from making fun of someone who is making an effort. I've done C25K multiple times over the past few years, and all at over 300 pounds. I don't have advice on how to get over putting your body out there; I just know that I decided not to care what anyone else thought. As a counter to some of the bad things that have happened to people, I once had a lady come up to me outside her house and say how she'd seen me running many times and was really inspired by me – and she was of "regular" size. No judgement at all, only praise and encouragement. Think of how many people out there might be thinking the same thing. Just get out there and do it, and BE PROUD of your efforts! xoxo 0
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When I see someone out there, huffing and puffing, I think "Oh wow! There's another one of us, welcome to the running family!
Ignore the barking lab down at the end of the street, she's really a cream puff who's just ticked she can't come and run with you. Oh, and watch out for the teenager on XYY street, he is always texting instead of driving. . .I really need to talk to his momma about that. But welcome to the cult, anyway. I remember when I first started, it was soooo cool!"
Seriously, just by getting out there and trying you are doing better than most people. If they have any bad thoughts about you, they're hypocrites and/or *kitten* and you really don't shouldn't find any relevance their invalid, nasty opinions anyway.0 -
cuz it's hard to do right? lol.jdscrubs32 wrote: »jdscrubs32 wrote: »jdscrubs32 wrote: »rrowdiness wrote: »Hey some quick solutions- Wear army surplus camo, it's designed to make it harder for people to see you.
- Run at night; be sure to wear pure black from head to toe, wraparound sunglasses and a hat for that additional anonymity
- Find places where there are no other people, and run there. You know, middle of the woods at midnight, that kinda stuff.
- Consult this video. Specifically at 1:02. This is all that matters about running. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aN7lt0CYwHg
- Stop worrying about what other people are thinking about you. They're not. They're thinking about them.
Run at night and wear pitch black clothing!!!! Recipe for getting knocked down that and getting injured. Poster who asked initial question ignore this.
Ever heard of reflective materials to put on top of black clothing? What a non-creative response.
Yes but the above person didn't include that. If they had, great advice. As they have not, dangerous advice.
I was quoting you, not the earlier poster...
Now I know why I don't comment in the threads.
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if anyone even notices you running I would imagine more people think 'good on her' rather than laughing.. if they do laugh, who cares, Id feel sorry for them and be proud that I'm out running and getting fitter and healthier0
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As long as you don't look like this, you'll be fine.
Focus on handling your workout, not how others act. You'll probably be less frustrated and more empowered that way.0 -
amanda091990 wrote: »Don't give a *kitten* what anyone thinks! Everyone has their own demons and their own insecurities! IF people are actually laughing, they are just deflecting their own insecurities by focusing on you. Meaning they are *kitten*! don't worry. focus on your health!
this, thanks for saving me the typing0 -
Girl you just gotta run past it. Some people may be watching, most aren't. I've had the same insecurities in the past. You know what most people are thinking? "You go girl." If they are thinking anything else, they are just people with ugly hearts. Remember you wont get anywhere if you care so much about what people think. Always walk as if you deserve to be exactly where you are.0
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Chances are very slim that anybody is paying attention, and if they are, it's because they want to be running too! I'm a runner, and when I drive past people running (which is all I see, a person running and I don't notice size or pace) I'm usually just bummed that that person is running and I'm not.
I think people are mostly paying too much attention to whatever they are doing to notice you running on the side of the road in any kind of negative way. And if they do, their bad attitude is their problem, not yours.
Be proud and run on, girlfriend. You're doing great.0 -
I really feel for you. I was the same way. I wanted to run, but I didn't want to be seen and judged because I was so out of breath. The way I got past it was #1) I want to do this! I can't live my life worried about what other people think. I need to love me and the hell with anyone who doesn't like me for the real me; #2) I realized that most people are actually thinking the same thing I think when I drive past someone running, "oh wow good for them. I need to do THAT". In all my time running, I have NEVER had anyone make any mean remarks. Actually, I remember at the park jogging and being so out of breath, but a passing jogger (very fit) stretched their hand out to me (like a high five deal) and told me to keep it up! And here I was thinking they would be like, "omg look at this fatty trying to run!".... Not at all! I've seen some amazing transformations from running. On my commute to work I used to drive by a girl who was heavy and had a limp but she was jogging, and clearly a beginner. I thought, "wow good for her but that must be so hard with a limp!"... Wouldn't you know, she kept it up. I saw her out there 4x a week and every week she just got faster and slimmer. That stuck with me because I thought, if she can do it with extra weight and a limp on a busy road then I've got no excuse. I hope this helps! Feel free to friend me (:0
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I understand that thinking. Just know that most people really are not laughing or probably even paying attention to you. My thoughts have always (even before trying to get in shape) been, "Good for you. Wish I had that dedication.". So, in all seriousness, enjoy your run and put thoughts of other people and their thoughts out of your mind.
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My theory is this, next time yell out something back like : "Hey I may be fat but you're ugly and I can fix my problem"....simple Stay positive, your doing this for yourself, not for others. 0
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Judgment and tough love are for the people who won't change their destructive ways. As soon as you decide to get off your duff and do something about it, you'll find there are 100 people thinking "Atta girl!" for every 1 dumb jealous jerk trying to hold you back. Misery loves company.0
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Please don't let others make you not want to do something. I understand it can be hard. When I started back running I was far from a fit person. I just put my ear buds in a went. No one really said anything to me or if they did I didn't listen or care for that matter. Chances are they are not even paying attention. If they do say something crappy just keep it up...before you know it you will be faster and stronger.
Just to let you know when I started I was 90lbs heavier than I am now. My pace on a good day was 11:45-12:00 minute mile. Today, I am 90lbs lighter and my pace is 8:34 min (5K), 9:15 (1/2 marathon) and 9:30-9:45 (marathon training pace). I will be running my marathon on Sunday.
Keep it up! 0 -
Nobody who runs would ever think badly about a beginner runner, let alone honk or yell out of their car window. On the off chance that anyone sees you and has a mean thought -- and most people won't notice you at all -- they're not a runner and you're doing something they can't do, so who gives a *kitten* about their opinion?0
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I used to see other people running on the street and I never once thought about how they looked. The only thing going through my head was "*kitten* they're brave, it's freezing out here". I started running myself, had the initial embarassment that you're having then realised, nobody is thinking anything other than a weird mix of admiration/pity for me being out in the cold!
Bring a friend with you if you're really bothered - you'll be so busy gabbing and b*tching about how much your legs hurt to notice anyone else
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peter56765 wrote: »Judgment and tough love are for the people who won't change their destructive ways. As soon as you decide to get off your duff and do something about it, you'll find there are 100 people thinking "Atta girl!" for every 1 dumb jealous jerk trying to hold you back. Misery loves company.
This is a good point too. Here on MFP it isn't unusual to see threads where the OP focusses on the minuscule percentage of negative comments they have received whilst forgetting completely about all the good ones. It is an extremely important perspective difference and key to maintaining happiness.0 -
Just remember this - you are lapping everyone who is sitting on the couch. Also, is it no an oxymoron for people to laugh. If someone is out of shape, that is exactly the person that should start a running program. If they have a problem with someone overweight, then they should be cheering a person who is doing something about it.0
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EricMurano wrote: »Keep at it. Think of us, your MFP pals, when you run
^^ Yep! We're proud of you and out there just doing what we're doing, too. Chin up, chest out, move forward. Well done!!
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