Increasing calories defriended for low intake

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MrM27 wrote: »

TheVirgoddess wrote: »

Jagkat wrote: »

I had a 3000 cal day and I spent the next week trying to eat low calories to make up for it. If someone didn't see my high calorie day they might think I always try to eat below and delete me. You don't always know why people do what they do. Try asking or commenting about their eating in a nice way. Just saying......

For me, I delete based on trends, not a single day, or even a single week. It's a combination of consistent low intake, constant negativity, excuses and general lack of willingness to be a partner in their health. As much as I want to save everyone, I can't. So I have to move on for my own mental health.

I completely agree there^^^^

I mostly delete people due to inactivity. Every 2 months I go in, sort by last log in and just delete people with 1 month + since last log in. Then along the way it's mostly everything you said above.

I do the same with inactivity. I like having active, positive friends that teach me new things and that I can celebrate accomplishments with. That's the fun part for me.

vhowru wrote: »

I was defriended because my calorie intake was too low although I eat more I guess I need to be accurate isn't that an odd thing to do ? Any advice besides be more accurate

I don't know if this has been addressed or not, but why not log accurately. If I'm reading this correctly, you don't log the actual amount that you eat? Why not just log everything and avoid someone thinking you're ED prone and avoid this entire situation?

I like my friends to succeed and part of that will be to eat so they get enough nutrition over time. I want them to lose weight in a sustainable healthy way and not just by starving themselves. If I see weeks of eating under 900 calories, then it just causes concern as to their relationship with food and how they are achieving their weight loss. Its also has a good chance of backfiring and resulting in a binge or quitting.

Think its perfectly understandable if such people are defriended if they insist on eating such low levels. Id prefer a minimum 1200 and more comfy with 1400 but thats up to them. I keep my friends numbers low, so tend to know them well enough and can factor in if theres a genuine reason for sustained low calories, fasying or medically supervised diet.

The whole friends thing is a bit of a mish mash anyway. People have very different ideas.

I had gastric bypass and there are days I struggle just to eat 1000 calories. But my calories are very protein/nutrient dense. It never occurred to me that people would friend then unfriend because I am not getting enough calories in their eyes. I guess you learn something new every day.

It is really hard to see people on here who are hurting themselves. I try to be positive and reach out, but when someone is in the midst of an eating disorder there is very little to do on here, so thus far I have ended up defriending because it's painful to watch. It doesn't sound like that is your issue though, which is a good thing

It is kind of beneficial for people with eating disorders to be friends with non eating disordered people, Especially if they are attempting to recover. I find it really difficult to know how to eat normally, seeing other peoples diaries can be a huge help for meal planning and the like.

lemurcat12 wrote: »

MarciBkonTrk wrote: »

I had gastric bypass and there are days I struggle just to eat 1000 calories. But my calories are very protein/nutrient dense. It never occurred to me that people would friend then unfriend because I am not getting enough calories in their eyes. I guess you learn something new every day.

I really don't think people are talking about situations like yours, and if it's any kind of friend relationship presumably they would know that about you? Or if they expressed concern you would share that?

People seem to be taking posts personally in a way that I don't think makes sense.

Agree that my circumstances are different but then again whose aren't. We are like snowflakes. Not one of us is exactly the same. It just never occurred to me that what a person eats or doesn't eat would be a reason to unfriend someone. Which again comes back to the "different strokes for different folks."