I'm a hypocrite

jrusso28
jrusso28 Posts: 249 Member
edited September 27 in Success Stories
Yesterday I went out with my family.
They noticed I lost weight, and aside from my brother everyone had only negative things to say.

1: I am too skinny now
2: I am scrawny on top
3: I am trying to push my new "fad dieting" onto them
- because I was telling them I am trying to eliminate sugar as much as possible because of the info I have learned over the past few months.
4: I am a hypocrite
- because I used to smoke and eat bad and now I am excited about eating better and losing weight and getting into shape.
5: It's not going to last

I was hurt, felt like the kid in the school yard who got picked on again.

I had to share because i have it all bottled up inside and cant say anything to anyone because I might begin my uncontrollable preaching again.

I got up this morning and rode 9 miles on my bike, ate my oatmeal, and entered my info into MFP.
I will be converting their bad energy into motivation. From now on when anyone asks how I am doing it I will just say I am eating better. I will never ever again share the details of what I have learned and how much this web site has helped.

I'll show them and the world that i can do this !!
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Replies

  • alienblonde1
    alienblonde1 Posts: 749 Member
    Congrats on the stopping smoking and weight loss. People are really afraid of change so mostly they reply negatively.
  • jmijaressf
    jmijaressf Posts: 215
    That's the spirit! Don't let others get you down. You're doing this for your own long-term health. I have the same challenges in my family. In fact, it was two family members who refuse to take care of their health that convinced me that I needed to make changes in my food and fitness choices.

    You're not a hypocrite. You've just seen the light! Press on towards your goal!
  • elvb
    elvb Posts: 423 Member
    I'm sorry you had to go through that. I know how you feel. People can be so mean and judgmental. Good for you in using it as motivation!! Congrats on your successes so far!!
  • bekahjk
    bekahjk Posts: 74 Member
    You are not a hypocrite. Everyone at some point had bad habits. Smoking, drinking, eating lots of sugar, no exercise etc............but at some point we all have that lightbulb come on and we change our lives! I think it's awesome! Go you and don't let the people in your life bring you down. Way to turn it into motivation. That being said it still stinks when people aren't supportive and it's very hurtful when it comes from the ones we love and care about.
  • oBirdieo
    oBirdieo Posts: 148
    People don't like change and many don't like to see others lose weight. Just keep in mind that you're doing this for yourself and not for them! :smile:
  • Helice
    Helice Posts: 1,075 Member
    Your the better person for not letting them hurt your progress.
    I use to smoke and eat very unhealthily too.
    And even though i still have my food slip ups.. i would never consider myself a hypocrite for telling people that they should eat healthier... because at the end of the day we all should! Even the sticks in this world!
    And good job for turning it into motivation!
    Im sure u look amazing!
    Keep it up and you'l show them all!
  • iamanne
    iamanne Posts: 67
    Do not let them get you down. People who are not doing the right thing don't want to think about what they are doing. You are not a hypocrite. You are person who has seen the error of their ways and has made a change. You are doing a hard amazing thing to change your life for the better. You are stronger than anyone's negative words. Keep up the good work and you will get there!!

    :flowerforyou:
  • shellyxxxxx
    shellyxxxxx Posts: 143
    you go girl , as long as your happy who cares ??
  • TMLPatrick
    TMLPatrick Posts: 558 Member
    I never understood how someone is not allowed to change things about themselves without being labeled a hypocrite or wishy-washy or whatever. Its total garbage.... if you eat bad, you do not always have to eat bad for the rest of your life because you currently do. What the heck is the point of life if you're not allowed to do different things???
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    Don't let your folks get you down. People get jealous and mean when someone does something they can't or won't commit to :) I think it's absolutely fantastic that you've quit smoking and gotten healthy! It's fabulous :) They'll come around eventually.
  • Ynnep1000
    Ynnep1000 Posts: 24
    Wow! I admire you for not letting this get you down. You are an inspiration to me even though I don't know you. Your family members are missing out on a great teacher and motivator by putting your efforts down. They could learn so much from you!
    I wish I had somebody in my life who is so motivated etc!
  • farmgirlh
    farmgirlh Posts: 240
    I am sorry that your family is being that way. I have run into the same things. Good luck to you!
  • You are not alone on that one. I find that it's the people who are/were not able to maintain their own healthy habits that discourage you. Keep your head high and stay on track! There are plenty of people who would appreciate your knowledge and experience.

    I have read about and also have done some friend "weeding." You begin to realize who is truely there for you as a person when you implement postive things into your life. It's a good way to get all of the negative out.

    Good luck to you in the future!
  • fridaysgal
    fridaysgal Posts: 37
    So sorry you had to have an experience like that! You are a reminder of their own struggles more than likely and therefore they feel the urge to sabotage (bring you back to their level)! Quitting smoking is a tremendous life-changer (10 years ago this October for me)....you lose your identity in a sense and have to learn how to be a totally different person. I'm sure weight loss will be pretty close to the same thing. It's a life-change and if they aren't willing to support you, you will need to learn selective hearing to block out the negative comments. Be proud of what you've accomplished all by yourself. YOU CAN DO THIS!

    Turning the frustration into power is great advice. 9 miles....very impressive!

    Good luck!
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
    I know the feeling. When people ask me how I have lost weight I just say I run 3 times a week. I don't bother telling them about cutting out wheat, circuits twice a week, and calorie counting, because no one wants to hear it's hard work. It just makes them narky.
  • Toniknox71
    Toniknox71 Posts: 34 Member
    First off, I applaude you for all of your changes! Stopping the smoking and changing your diet are HUGE accomplishments! I know what you are saying though, I have the same things with co workers sometimes. When I see them grabbing a candy bar and huge bottle of pop I tell them about how many calories and sugars and stuff is in it and they are like "you have to die of something" I only was telling them because that was my problem, I never stopped to look and realize what I was putting in my mouth in a day. Just thought if I could get one more person to see that I could help them. But I don't do it anymore! When they ask how did you lose so much weight, I ask do you really want to know before I answer...lol. I started the change because my husband had a heart attack, I just don't want others to have to find out the hard way!
    Anyway, congrats and good luck in the future. And I agree, turn the negative into motivation to keep going! Sometimes I think people are just jealous because they would like to do the same thing but are afraid of failing if they try!
  • Missylydia
    Missylydia Posts: 304 Member
    My family are like that but it's insecurity. It's funny how insecurity comes out when you loose weight, and it never comes out nicely!
    Your collar bones are so obvious now, You're eyes are all sunken, look at your shoulders.... Um, I'm still at the top of the healthy BMI range, I'm hardly anorexic, calm down...
    You know last year, a 'friend' said to me, after I'd lost a few pounds. 'wow, you're almost slim', all smiling and nodding and stuff.
    I actually wasn't fat in the first place, I had a healthy BMI. What a ...not very nice person.
    So, if this is what comes out of friends, family can be much worse, as they don't need the same filter.
    Just gotta keep calm and carry on. And do really vigorous workouts to vent the rage!
    Teehee
    :)
  • CanuckLove
    CanuckLove Posts: 673 Member
    This just makes me angry that your family is not supporting you but I think I can speak for everyone as your MFP Family: YOU ARE DOING FABULOUS!!!!! :)

    Don't get discouraged by what other people think, it's your body, your life. Negative opinions usually stem from personal insecurities so don't let them drag you down. Fantastic accomplishments - keep going!~

    -Jae
  • ladybg81
    ladybg81 Posts: 1,553 Member
    Congrats on all of your accomplishments!!! Do not let them get you down. Use this as motivation to "show them!!!" People are afraid of change and seem to want to pull down the ones that are not conforming to their "norm." Show 'em honey and make them eat their words!!! Keep it up!!!
  • ceebs9
    ceebs9 Posts: 511 Member
    I hear stuff like this and am just shocked that family members can act that way! I've had friends give me crap (not anymore....they're used to me now) but I've always had the support of my family. I guess I need to count my blessings. Keep up what you're doing. You'll be a much happier you!
  • khrys1
    khrys1 Posts: 444 Member
    I'm sorry your family isn't being supportive, but good for you for taking the negative energy and putting it to good use, rather than just letting the negativity cause you to fall of the wagon. Keep up the good work!
  • webdiva1
    webdiva1 Posts: 326 Member
    Silly family -- they don't get it. Your attitude is GREAT. Keep going. :)
  • Janeta58
    Janeta58 Posts: 59 Member
    Nope. You are not a hypocrite. Congratulations on taking charge of YOUR OWN LIFE. Sounds like your family might be feeling a tad threatened by the changes in your life. Keep on doing what you are doing and remember, if someone is interested in how you are losing weight and living a more healthy life, they will ask you. Otherwise, keep on doing what you are doing. Good on ya!
  • BradNC
    BradNC Posts: 51
    From time to time, I think most of us experience this. Those people have been beat down by life in most cases, and have found it's easier to give up than to work hard. Keep up the positive attitude - awesome progress so far!
  • Goal_Seeker_1988
    Goal_Seeker_1988 Posts: 1,619 Member
    There you go prove them wrong. They are obvisously envious of you! :flowerforyou:
  • ebgbjo
    ebgbjo Posts: 821 Member
    Congrats on making a better lifestyle for yourself by losing weight and definitely by quitting smoking. Neither of them have been easy for you I am sure. I know it is easier said then done, but do not listen to the negativity. For some reason seems like the people that care about us the most are the ones to sometimes kick us the most when they should be celebrating our successes.
  • Rubie81
    Rubie81 Posts: 720 Member
    That is horrible. But you have such a great way of thinking. You will get very far.
  • AuntRedRobi
    AuntRedRobi Posts: 14
    Congrats on quiting smoking, weight loss and continued focus!
  • StevLL
    StevLL Posts: 921 Member
    No you are awesome! Look at the positive changes you've made. Sometimes it's hard for families to be happy for one of their own, because it means they have to be responsible for themselves or at the very least look at themselves. A very scary prospect fo many. If you preached and still did all those things you would be a hypocrite. Don't let them get you down. You have to draw boundaries on what you will acccept from them if you want to be free of their negativity. At first it will be all your fault and they wil blame you, but if you nicely remind them you would appreciate negative comments to be kept to themselves, they'll eventually change. good luck, if you need support friends me and my wife (hootsmamma) have experienced this type of family interaction and it is changing for the better by holding a boundary and not engaging the negativity. good luck
  • jrusso28
    jrusso28 Posts: 249 Member
    Thanks for the supporting words everyone !!

    Just pisses me off cause I want to celebrate the successes and cant.

    Thanks again folks !!
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