We broke up because...
Replies
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            Would come home with her *kitten* covered in red handprints!0
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            Never wanted to lick the paint off0
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            Ate paint chips.0
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            grew up under power lines.0
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            Stood too close to the microwave.0
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            Couldn't handle my girth.0
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            Wash her boobs with Toilet water0
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            She dumped me for Jackie!0
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            Accused me of cheating with Jackie0
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            Her body was too bootylicious0
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            Was always borrowing my stuff without asking, then losing and/or damaging it0
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            Because she thought I was one of her five kids!0
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            Got mad because he would come home to me just wearing his shorts0
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            Would invite random men over and just be wearing boxer shorts0
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            Found my pet zombies0
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            used her pet zombies to hunt down my enemies and she didnt like that i had more fun with them than with her0
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            Pffft. Nobody can handle my zombies. Because...ninja0
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            She never made sense, always rambling about zombies and ninja's. I had her committed.0
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            Zombies are ninjas.0
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            The only thing we could agree on was "zombies are ninjas."0
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            Her and her ex still had a connection.0
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            Put a goldfish in my steering wheel.0
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            Zombie Jedi Ninja?! that is all0
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            Zombie jedi ninja thor0
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            Zombie sith ninja0
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            Jedi's are not selfish0
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            Zombie Hulk!!!!!!!!0
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            True. Zombie vader0
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            Lost her job at Radio Shack0
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            was always peeking at me like this when I rolled over in bed. Come on be less obvious!0
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