We broke up because...
Replies
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Would come home with her *kitten* covered in red handprints!0
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Never wanted to lick the paint off0
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Ate paint chips.0
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grew up under power lines.0
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Stood too close to the microwave.0
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Couldn't handle my girth.0
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Wash her boobs with Toilet water0
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She dumped me for Jackie!0
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Accused me of cheating with Jackie0
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Her body was too bootylicious0
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Was always borrowing my stuff without asking, then losing and/or damaging it0
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Because she thought I was one of her five kids!0
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Got mad because he would come home to me just wearing his shorts0
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Would invite random men over and just be wearing boxer shorts0
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Found my pet zombies0
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used her pet zombies to hunt down my enemies and she didnt like that i had more fun with them than with her0
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Pffft. Nobody can handle my zombies. Because...ninja0
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She never made sense, always rambling about zombies and ninja's. I had her committed.0
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Zombies are ninjas.0
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The only thing we could agree on was "zombies are ninjas."0
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Her and her ex still had a connection.0
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Put a goldfish in my steering wheel.0
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Zombie Jedi Ninja?! that is all0
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Zombie jedi ninja thor0
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Zombie sith ninja0
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Jedi's are not selfish0
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Zombie Hulk!!!!!!!!0
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True. Zombie vader0
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Lost her job at Radio Shack0
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was always peeking at me like this when I rolled over in bed. Come on be less obvious!0
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