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We broke up because...
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I love you like a fat kid loves cake and I am trying to lose weight0
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He ate my Birthday cake before i even saw it!
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Wouldn't take me golfing with him. He was afraid I would show him up on the course.0
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wouldnt eat her birthday cake in her birthday suit0
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I took her golfing once and she ran me over with the golf kart0
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Pulled a Tiger Woods!
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Jen is a taker not a giver!0
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He took pictures with other women0
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Kept telling me to touch my toes.0
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Took Moonshine in the jar.........to be a literal statement.0
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She took high heels to the next level.0
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Was too afraid of Stilettos!0
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She was taller than me with those thangs on and I felt like the girl0
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Didn't save me any Mac and cheese0
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She wouldn't let me put bacon crumbles in the mac and cheese0
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he reminds of a guy I know, and I'm not into guys.0
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He was picky!0
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She didn't put me number one on her top friends list on MySpace0
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He still used "My Space"!0
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She ate my ice cream0
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I wasn't socially advanced and the awkward times piled up0
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He would sit in silence and stare at me when we went out, to dinner, movies, even bowling. Unnerving.0
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She turned me in for helping break Rob Downy out of jail!0
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Had too many ex-convicts as exes.0
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What? We broke up? When were you going to tell me? Guess I can take your V-day gift back.0
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Was not an exconvict0
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I was a guard, she got me fired, wtf0
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Got fired from his job0
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Did so many shoulder presses had to walk sideways through the door0
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