Do you really think one can be happy FAT?

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  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,665 Member
    edited March 2015
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    sjadev1108 wrote: »
    I don't mean to equate skinny with happy, or to say that thin people never have bad days. I do, however, think that being obese, you have put more obstacles in your own way.
    That's subjective though. While it's an issue with higher health risk, what obstacles are you referring to? Playing sports? There's lots of thin people that can't play sports? Getting a job? Thinner people may be more "ideal" in perception for a job, but doesn't always equate to a job well done. Unlucky in love? There are lots of lonely lean people out there too.
    So define the obstacles that pertain to obese people that don't pertain to lean people?

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  • BarbieAS
    BarbieAS Posts: 1,414 Member
    edited March 2015
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    Happy with their health/body image, or happy overall? I would say maybe, for a very small proportion of people, for the former, and of course for the latter.

    One does not have to be happy with EVERY SINGLE aspect of their life and self in order to be generally happy. I'm overweight, I have probably 60lbs to lose before I will be at a weight where I can be satisfied with the number on the scale (not discounting possible further fitness or aesthetic goals after my initial weight goal, but that's where I know I've been comfortable in the past). HOWEVER, I have two amazing children, a wonderful husband, great friends and extended family (for the most part, lol), a satisfying job, have no significant health issues (yet) - including no mental health issues that may impact my mood or satisfaction with my life, am not struggling financially, have a lovely home and community, have ample opportunities for hobbies and activities and volunteerism that I enjoy...thankfully. Plus, I like to think I'm a pretty decent person. I'm happy, no question. Am I currently satisfied with the way I look and feel, from a weight perspective? No. But my weight does not define me as a whole person, and I find it insulting for someone to imply that it should.
  • weightofgold
    weightofgold Posts: 17 Member
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    You might have been but I do not equate my success in life with my body fat percentage. I am intelligent, funny, holds a Phd, a wonderful husband , a beautiful son. I am supposed to unhappy because i am overweight? really? I was thin until my pregnancy 4 years ago. I want to lose weight eventually because I have family history of diabetics. But am I going to happier once I am thinner? I doubt it.
  • weightofgold
    weightofgold Posts: 17 Member
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    BarbieAS wrote: »
    Happy with their health/body image, or happy overall? I would say maybe, for a very small proportion of people, for the former, and of course for the latter.

    One does have to be happy with EVERY SINGLE aspect of their life and self in order to be generally happy. I'm overweight, I have probably 60lbs to lose before I will be at a weight where I can be satisfied with the number on the scale (not discounting possible further fitness or aesthetic goals after my initial weight goal, but that's where I know I've been comfortable in the past). HOWEVER, I have two amazing children, a wonderful husband, great friends and extended family (for the most part, lol), a satisfying job, have no significant health issues (yet) - including no mental health issues that may impact my mood or satisfaction with my life, am not struggling financially, have a lovely home and community, have ample opportunities for hobbies and activities and volunteerism that I enjoy...thankfully. Plus, I like to think I'm a pretty decent person. I'm happy, no question. Am I currently satisfied with the way I look and feel, from a weight perspective? No. But my weight does not define me as a whole person, and I find it insulting for someone to imply that it should.


    Well put....
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,741 Member
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    For most of my late teens to early thirties I weighed over 250 lb, so I was morbidly obese and I still felt happy, comfortable in 99% of situations (physically and emotionally comfortable) and even felt quite attractive most of the time.

    Now at a healthy weight for my height, I'm happier...but not by much. I don't say that to complain. I was happy before and I'm happy now. So I KNOW it is definitely possible.
  • gothchiq
    gothchiq Posts: 4,590 Member
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    I was fairly happy as a fat girl, up until my blood sugar and cholesterol went bananas. Then I had to change that. It really is much easier to get nice clothes now at size 8, though. I sure do miss the food but oh well. Whatcha gonna do. Gotta play the hand I'm dealt. If my blood values had stayed ok I would probably still be happy and fat.
  • Atarahh
    Atarahh Posts: 485 Member
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    Really doe?! That's like saying a person with a disability can't truly be happy. Happiness comes from within. It should not be based on anything external!
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    That being said, this question burned in me for years,

    "What one thing could you do that if you did on a regular basis would make a tremendous positive difference in your personal life?" It's the question in Covey's third habit from "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People".

    I knew what the answer was; weight loss. Not dealing with that one thing that I knew would make the biggest positive difference, took a toll on my personal integrity.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    ...and on the OTHER hand, to claim I can't be fat and happy would mean to diminish the last fifty years of my life! No way. I made my choices and lived with them. Lots of great memories under that bridge.
  • liekewheeless
    liekewheeless Posts: 416 Member
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    Being happy doesn't have to be tied to how you look or how healthy you are. Otherwise anyone with anything out of the norm looks/health could never be happy.

    Being happy doesn't mean you won't/don't want to be healthier.

    Being happy at any size is probably the best thing you can do for yourself. A positive outlook can make a big difference. Doesn't mean you should get complacent and not improve your health.

    So yes,..you can be overweight and happy,.. I was.
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
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    Why wouldn't they? Limiters to happiness that don't relate to individual perspective might be physical discomfort or health issues, also societal bias if they're sensitive to it, but otherwise, really, come on.
  • happygalah
    happygalah Posts: 343 Member
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    For me no, because both times I got fat there were circumstances that contributed to it like 1st time being in a very abusive marriage. This time was from death in the family and other family troubles. Both times led to severe depression where I ate a lot.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
    edited March 2015
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    See people can be happy even with limitations. I was a morbidly obese size 28 happy woman. Sure I got winded on stairs, sure I had problems tying my shoes..etc..etc, but these were merely inconveniences I could live with, just like being uncomfortable sitting on a hard surface now that I've lost a big chunk of weight, having loose skin, or that my favorite bra does not come in a small enough band. Had I not come face to face with the possibility of getting diabetes I would have possibly still been a happy size 28. I wouldn't say I'm happier now than I used to be as a morbidly obese, it's just a different kind of happiness. Things that make me happy now are different, and I wouldn't have enjoyed them back then.

    Edit: Just for the record. As a morbidly obese person I never had problems in the love department, social relationships, enjoying my life outside or in my career.
  • BrunetteRunner87
    BrunetteRunner87 Posts: 591 Member
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    I think anyone in any circumstance can be happy...but I don't know if someone can genuinely be happy ABOUT being fat.
  • itsclobberintime
    itsclobberintime Posts: 164 Member
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    Happiness is not always dependent on your appearance.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
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    BrunetteRunner87 wrote: »
    I think anyone in any circumstance can be happy...but I don't know if someone can genuinely be happy ABOUT being fat.

    ABOUT being fat, probably not (although I do like myself a little bit plump at the very end of healthy BMI), but sometimes it's whatever tips the scale. If the things that make me happy are also the things that contribute to me being fat then the perceived tradeoff is well worth it and is a more appealing option than being thin and losing those privileges.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
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    Being happy and being happy with your body are two entirely different things.

    I'm still overweight and I'm perfectly happy. I don't believe in finding happiness in physical, ever evolving things. I find happiness in love, great weather, a good book, good friends. Having blonde hair doesn't make me happy or unhappy. It just is. My weight (no matter what it is) doesn't make me happy or unhappy, it just is.

    I guess it depends on how much value you place on your appearance that will determine how much that influences your happiness.
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
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    there are a lot of things that contribute to my happiness other than my weight but I sure was miserable not fitting into my clothes and looking at pictures of myself when I was so heavy. I feel much happier and have more confidence now. Just feel better about myself like I have some control and not letting food dominate me.
  • MeiannaLee
    MeiannaLee Posts: 338 Member
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    I dont know much about psychology or others in general (lol), but I do know that before I started loosing weight and was fat, I was not happy. And as much as I tried to be body positive and convince myself that I had to love my body as it was and embrace my "curves"(double lol), i couldnt. The fact of the matter was, I was born to be fit and healthy.

    Ive only lost about 12 pounds, but I have so much confidence now Its unbelievable.
    And I love the feeling of being sore after leg day, and then having some nice fruit and veggies.

    I love all aspects of the healthy, clean life. And this is just what I needed to be happy. Others dont need this, because they are happy with the way they are and they way their lives are. Which is fantastic!
  • ryanhorn
    ryanhorn Posts: 355 Member
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    There's so much more to life than a number on a scale. I'm sure there are plenty of people that are larger that are on top of the world in happiness just like there's probably plenty of people who are fit that are miserable. It's a state of mind.

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