A short rant about many of the posts I have been seeing here. May come off as harsh but must be said
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kids nowadays, so full of knowledge0
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its not what he said, it was the delivery.
and this coming from someone who routinely is told im a crass *kitten* with no heart.
much like my own teenagers, you have a lot of growing to do.
And while we all have our own challenges, yes, virginia, we are all responsible for our own health and weight.0 -
can I just interject and say that this wasn't a short rant at all?0
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Ah youth! I have my own teenager to worry about here at home.0
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I like you just fine. But my pet peeve about this board is different. I see endless replies to these sorts of posts you are talking about that it is a simple matter of CICO and all the people are missing is "willpower".
Meanwhile some of these people have been busting their butts, working harder and longer at this weight loss game, and there are weeks when the scale won't budge! It is devastating. They come here for answers. How can we explain that weight loss is not linear, that extreme effort does not always result in a commensurate extreme loss, be patient, measure honestly, and the losses will come?
I say show kindness in the reply, no matter how often it has to be repeated. This advice from a grandma who has lost significant weight too but has a little more life experience.0 -
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lots of people on here have no education on weight loss or fitness so some will ask for advice, some will do what they think is best. weight loss is not really a one fits all. some people come here for advice and some come to shove their ways down peoples throats. you get the narcissists who think their way is the only way and you get the frustrated people who feel like they want to educate people. to be honest i have learnt by posting looking for any kind of advice on here is not worth it because smart arses with stupid *kitten* comments will always post back. some people are good on here and give constructive advice but for the most it's drama llama trolls who like online bullying as a hobby.0
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^ I hope you're not calling me a bully? Not gonna lie, that would make me sad to think that what I just posted is now classed as bullying and being a narcissist.0
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rachylouise87 wrote: »lots of people on here have no education on weight loss or fitness so some will ask for advice, some will do what they think is best. weight loss is not really a one fits all. some people come here for advice and some come to shove their ways down peoples throats. you get the narcissists who think their way is the only way and you get the frustrated people who feel like they want to educate people. to be honest i have learnt by posting looking for any kind of advice on here is not worth it because smart arses with stupid *kitten* comments will always post back. some people are good on here and give constructive advice but for the most it's drama llama trolls who like online bullying as a hobby.
yes it is .. it's CICO
how you acheive CICO is not a one size fits all ... you're right there .. but it is actually CICO for everybody
edit to confirm (in case it's not clear): posted for irony
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I totally agree with you. 'fatlogic' and the ridiculous things some people tell themselves drive me crazy. And I say this as someone who believed various bull for years.
I also say this as a 5ft 4 257lb woman who used to be 280lb and is getting off her behind and sorting it out. No excuses, no fatlogic, no wavering. Only accurate logging, calorie deficit and exercise
I am not remotely offended to be told I am fat and it's ENTIRELY my fault.
Conditions that make you more likely to gain weight are very rare, and even then the weight is only gained if you fail to compensate for it with diet and exercise or at least with diet.
Until people understand that, they're going to pussyfoot around believing there's no point in trying. Like I did for years. What a waste of my twenties!
I firmly believe the truth of the matter and getting your grown up pants firmly on, and getting on with it is what's needed. Accuracy and lying to yourself also!0 -
Damn Ribbitjb! I like you!0
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Joe, holy smokes your smart! eat less! really? never thought of that? hhmm...Hun, I'm use to being fit, running, taught aerobics etc... What im facing has taken that away. The medicine makes me want to eat an entire cow literally, crazy stuff.. I'm a completely different person on it. I'm not use to this. Never had to take meds. I havent gained weight like this since pregnancy. Call it an excuse if you want. And the next guy or girl too..I just pray you don't have to face what many of are facing with weight loss.
Best wishes!
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oops accuracy and NO lying to yourself that should say. haha0
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TavistockToad wrote: »You're new here aren't you?
^ this ... The spike you saw or have seen is the new years spike. I've been on here for almost 3 years now ... it never stops... get use to it brother. Also you don't have to read the posts ...
Edit: I love how you 6 months of experience with weight loss/ working out has made you a guru!!0 -
b.b..but eating less works? I wasn't being mean when I said that to you, I was just saying that even if you have restricted movement you don't have to gain weight. Just dont eat as much because you're not moving as much and you wont put on weight? I dont understand what I said wrong.0
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Wiseandcurious wrote: »joejward95 wrote: »I do find it very odd that so many people are focusing on my age as to why I am apparently incorrect. If I am so blatantly incorrect why are you not pointing out what I have said wrong? By focusing on my age you are really not saying anything with factual basis.
Many of you also seem to ignore that I have stated this post is not aimed towards that many of you. It is a very small minority that this is targeted to, so obviously it wont apply to most of you.
Also,you have no idea what my life experiences are? You have no idea how had I may of had to work to be in the position I am in life right now do you?
I'll give you a hint. I have had a very tough life. Tougher than I bet most of you had during your youth. That is as much detail as I want to go into, but I find it very rude to just discredit someone due to their age. It comes off as very immature.
People are not mostly saying you're wrong, because you are right about a lot. They are focusing on your age because your lack of life experience shows in the way you said it, just like it shines through your post I quoted above. That doesn't take away the merit from your thoughts but does put them in a perspective. Learn to see that perspective and you're another step ahead in personal growth (I prefer that word to "growing up" because growing up implies that one day you just get there and you're done - believe me, that's not how it works. It's a life-long process.)
A final thought: humanity has been trying to make "tough love" work for millions of years to teach people things and it has never taught them anything of value. Gentle education beats "tough love" hands-down any day. If gentle education doesn't work for a person, tough love doesn't work usually either because they're just not ready. At least that's how things look from the viewpoint of my (personal and limited) experience and observation. (That includes years of teaching by the way). Worth thinking about? Thought I'd share just in case.
Yeah not actually true - tough love works with some people - gentle education works with other people - educational strategy changes every 3-5 years and everybody thinks they have reinvented the wheel.
You may be right. My thought is based not on educational strategy (I am not from North America originally any way, and I was not a schoolteacher - take that as you will
) but on personal observations on my students, friends, relatives, colleagues. Not one person has responded better to "tough love". Just to clarify that what people 98% of the time call "tough love" is not giving someone the tough truth - it's actually giving them the truth in a tough way.
Not disagreeing with you, I understand it's a matter of viewpoint. That's why I shared it as a thought, a perspective - not a gospel.
Sorry for off topic.0 -
Common wisdom is that in order to become an expert in something, you need to have devoted 10,000 hours to the study of it. OP, come back in 4 years and if you've maintained or even lowered your body fat percent, then by all means, preach away.
I've been around here for a while now, and every year, it's the same. There are no new topics, just the same questions asked by different people trying to figure out the whole thing. Some people figure it out, others don't. Asking a question or feeling like a failure in the beginning doesn't mean someone's going to fail or is failing. Having immediate success because you're only 18 and things are much, much easier when you're still a kid doesn't guarantee long term success. I hope you do have long term success, but you just lost the weight. Do you know what lifting program optimizes your goals? Do you intend to be completely devoted to marathons? Do you know what carb-fat-protein ratios best optimize your running speed and performance? I mean, other than what you can easily find on Google, of course.
Point people are making is that simply because you've gained a bit of knowledge, it doesn't make you an expert. Trust me, there are a LOT of pseudo-experts here, and they all love to preach to the masses.0 -
this should degenerate rather quickly …
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I never once claimed I was an expert. I have said many times I am not an expert. But you dont have to spent 10,000 hours to know how to drive a car do you? The same way I dont have to have spent 10,000 hours to learn how to keep myself in shape.0
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Well, good for you.
There are a ton of people who want fast results.
They are just impatient that's why they want to know what's going on.
It doesn't hurt to ask others for help.
Hell, I'm sure you asked for help yourself.0 -
There are a lot of people who are bagging on the OP because he is young, but at the same time there are other university-aged users on this site asking about raspberry ketones and cleanses.
I give him credit for realizing that it is about taking personal responsibility about what happens to one's own body.0 -
joejward95 wrote: »I love these people responding about my age! Is this really the only thing yo can say to discredit me? Does you being older somehow make you understand weight loss better than me?
You should have mentioned giving age as an excuse for not losing/maintaining weight. BTW. I'm 59 have had 8 upper body orthopedic procedures in the last 6 years to go along with a case of sepsis. I'm at the weight I was when I graduated from high school. It can be done.0 -
novembersuse wrote: »The whole point of MFP is for support and motivation. If people didn't struggle, and fail, and start again, and fail again, and keep going and keep trying, there would be no MFP and everyone would be fit and slim and at their optimum health. Human beings are falliable, and losing weight is tough. Maybe not for you, for which, well done. But other folk sometimes struggle.
no mfp if for counting calories..
I never understood where people get the "this is a support and motivation" site…
when you sign up it asks you to put your states in and gives you a calorie number to eat to. It does not ask what support or motivational group you want to join.
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I asked for advice and help many times. I still ask for advice all the time on topics to do with fitness. The difference is that I always followed it, didn't make excuses as to why I wasnt able to follow it, or why it wouldn't work for me. I listened to people who knew infinitely more than me and followed the advice.0
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joejward95 wrote: »I never once claimed I was an expert. I have said many times I am not an expert. But you dont have to spent 10,000 hours to know how to drive a car do you? The same way I dont have to have spent 10,000 hours to learn how to keep myself in shape.
Actually, someone who has driven a car for at least 10,000 hours drives much better than someone who hasn't. It's one of the reasons teen boys wreck more cars than anyone else. They think they know everything there is to know about driving a car. You can't exactly go out to a race track and lay rubber, or get behind the wheel of a tractor-trailer and expect to maneuver it.
Same goes for health and fitness performance. Try KEEPING yourself in shape instead of just getting there for the first time.0 -
novembersuse wrote: »The whole point of MFP is for support and motivation. If people didn't struggle, and fail, and start again, and fail again, and keep going and keep trying, there would be no MFP and everyone would be fit and slim and at their optimum health. Human beings are falliable, and losing weight is tough. Maybe not for you, for which, well done. But other folk sometimes struggle.
no mfp if for counting calories..
I never understood where people get the "this is a support and motivation" site…
when you sign up it asks you to put your states in and gives you a calorie number to eat to. It does not ask what support or motivational group you want to join.
*knocks it out the park*0 -
joejward95 wrote: »I asked for advice and help many times. I still ask for advice all the time on topics to do with fitness. The difference is that I always followed it, didn't make excuses as to why I wasnt able to follow it, or why it wouldn't work for me. I listened to people who knew infinitely more than me and followed the advice.
Problem is some people have only been doing this for say like 6 months or since September and think they know when they don't.
Again if you don't like the posts don't *kitten* read them.0 -
Wiseandcurious wrote: »Wiseandcurious wrote: »joejward95 wrote: »I do find it very odd that so many people are focusing on my age as to why I am apparently incorrect. If I am so blatantly incorrect why are you not pointing out what I have said wrong? By focusing on my age you are really not saying anything with factual basis.
Many of you also seem to ignore that I have stated this post is not aimed towards that many of you. It is a very small minority that this is targeted to, so obviously it wont apply to most of you.
Also,you have no idea what my life experiences are? You have no idea how had I may of had to work to be in the position I am in life right now do you?
I'll give you a hint. I have had a very tough life. Tougher than I bet most of you had during your youth. That is as much detail as I want to go into, but I find it very rude to just discredit someone due to their age. It comes off as very immature.
People are not mostly saying you're wrong, because you are right about a lot. They are focusing on your age because your lack of life experience shows in the way you said it, just like it shines through your post I quoted above. That doesn't take away the merit from your thoughts but does put them in a perspective. Learn to see that perspective and you're another step ahead in personal growth (I prefer that word to "growing up" because growing up implies that one day you just get there and you're done - believe me, that's not how it works. It's a life-long process.)
A final thought: humanity has been trying to make "tough love" work for millions of years to teach people things and it has never taught them anything of value. Gentle education beats "tough love" hands-down any day. If gentle education doesn't work for a person, tough love doesn't work usually either because they're just not ready. At least that's how things look from the viewpoint of my (personal and limited) experience and observation. (That includes years of teaching by the way). Worth thinking about? Thought I'd share just in case.
Yeah not actually true - tough love works with some people - gentle education works with other people - educational strategy changes every 3-5 years and everybody thinks they have reinvented the wheel.
You may be right. My thought is based not on educational strategy (I am not from North America originally any way, and I was not a schoolteacher - take that as you will ) but on personal observations on my students, friends, relatives, colleagues. Not one person has responded better to "tough love". Just to clarify that what people 98% of the time call "tough love" is not giving someone the tough truth - it's actually giving them the truth in a tough way.
Not disagreeing with you, I understand it's a matter of viewpoint. That's why I shared it as a thought, a perspective - not a gospel.
Sorry for off topic.
This whole subject is a difficult one. People who are overweight often wrap themselves in layers of self-delusion. It's really, really easy, when you've been there yourself, to spot a poster who is caught in that trap. It's frustrating. You want to help them break through it, but there's really no way to do that.
Honestly, whether the gentle approach works or whether the tougher approach works depends on the person's personality--to an extent. I think there's a continuum of denial of sorts. Every person has to run through until they reach the end of it. Where they are on that journey, how close they are to the end, what sort of message (kind/blunt) will reach them? It's all up in the air. To that end, the mix of what they get here is probably a good thing.
For every person who posts, who knows how many lurkers read?
One size of advice doesn't fit all.
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Amanda, you're making such little sense.(sorry that sounded rude) Yes I dont know as much as someone who has been fit for 10 years, but the very fact that I have lost weight shows I atleast HAVE the knowledge to have gotten there in the first place. Im not going to suddenly lose the knowledge next week.
If I start gaining in 10 years, I either work out harder or eat less. Its a simple rule to follow.0 -
joejward95 wrote: »I never once claimed I was an expert. I have said many times I am not an expert. But you dont have to spent 10,000 hours to know how to drive a car do you? The same way I dont have to have spent 10,000 hours to learn how to keep myself in shape.
well, who would you take driving advice from …a 17 year old who has been driving for six months, or a 35 year old who has been driving for 15 years???
same with weight loss/fitness. A lot of us have been doing this a long time and have gone through the spinning our wheels cycle of fad diets, eating clean, fitness myths, etc, and over that time have acquired a lot of knowledge in our quest to get it right…
just saying…
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