Calorie-free food
Whitezombiegirl
Posts: 1,042 Member
Its true- foods is magically calorie-free under the following circumstances:
- No-one was looking
- You didn’t enjoy it
- It was a free sample at a country stall
- You ate it whilst were in transit (walking between kitchen and lounge counts)
- It was made by a child (my nephew is too nice to put calories in his cupcakes)
- It was made by a nice old lady (see above)
- It was your birthday/ holiday/ anniversary
- It was ‘cook-perks’ (only tasting to make sure it’s cooked right)
- It was (un-logged) left –overs
- It was off someone-else’s plate
- You forgot you ate it
- It was a gift
- It wasn’t an integral part of the meal (ketchup, bread roll, salad dressing)
- It was liquid
- Your skinny friend ate one too.
I’m sure you can think of more ‘calorie-free’ foods……..( yes, this is a joke- but it is something to think about)
- No-one was looking
- You didn’t enjoy it
- It was a free sample at a country stall
- You ate it whilst were in transit (walking between kitchen and lounge counts)
- It was made by a child (my nephew is too nice to put calories in his cupcakes)
- It was made by a nice old lady (see above)
- It was your birthday/ holiday/ anniversary
- It was ‘cook-perks’ (only tasting to make sure it’s cooked right)
- It was (un-logged) left –overs
- It was off someone-else’s plate
- You forgot you ate it
- It was a gift
- It wasn’t an integral part of the meal (ketchup, bread roll, salad dressing)
- It was liquid
- Your skinny friend ate one too.
I’m sure you can think of more ‘calorie-free’ foods……..( yes, this is a joke- but it is something to think about)
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Replies
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CHARITY CHOCOLATE!
Everyone knows chocolate is 100% calorie free if it is purchased in support of charity or another community group.0 -
Anything eaten after midnight0
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badgerbadger1 wrote: »Anything eaten after midnight
This ^^
and the food you eat after you've finished your entry
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Anything licked off the spoon after measuring out a portion0
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Alatariel75 wrote: »Anything licked off the spoon after measuring out a portion
Yes! I tried a little (gross) experiment. I licked the spoon after measuring greek yoghurt. Instead of swallowing it, I spat (yes spat!) it into the bowl. It was 7g. Interesting.0 -
Whitezombiegirl wrote: »Alatariel75 wrote: »Anything licked off the spoon after measuring out a portion
Yes! I tried a little (gross) experiment. I licked the spoon after measuring greek yoghurt. Instead of swallowing it, I spat (yes spat!) it into the bowl. It was 7g. Interesting.
LMAO!! Wouldn't it have been easier to weigh the spoon before scooping and again after? Nowhere near as entertaining, though!0 -
Alatariel75 wrote: »Anything licked off the spoon after measuring out a portion
I actually did that after I first bought my food scale and immediately thought wtf?0 -
Anything eaten after sex. Hey, I'm NOT going back to the cigarette!0
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Tasting calories when cooking.
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Anything eaten after sex. Hey, I'm NOT going back to the cigarette!
OMG, no! haven't you read this thread??
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10130182/sex-vs-weight
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If it goes in the coffee, it's calorie free, right?0
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Alatariel75 wrote: »
OMG, no! haven't you read this thread??
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10130182/sex-vs-weight
Omg, I'm dying! That thread just made my morning!
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Anything eaten off the samples cart at Costco of course.0
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Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »Anything eaten off the samples cart at Costco of course.
Ohhh, good one! I think free samples across the board are calorie free.0 -
If you eat them while you're sleep walking.0
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Cookies have no calories if they are broken0
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cbhubbybubble wrote: »Cookies have no calories if they are broken
I can get on board with this!0 -
Food eaten while watching sport. Mind over matter and all that, you get so engaged in watching people run around that you psychically absorb some of the calorie burns.0
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Alatariel75 wrote: »Anything eaten after sex. Hey, I'm NOT going back to the cigarette!
OMG, no! haven't you read this thread??
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10130182/sex-vs-weight
I once referred to Food Network as "my porn", but that's a whole different therapy session; )0 -
Coffee?0
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I've 'cooked' the calories out of many foods.
I've also heard you can strain the calories out of some foods if you run them under cold water!0 -
Whitezombiegirl wrote: »Alatariel75 wrote: »Anything licked off the spoon after measuring out a portion
Yes! I tried a little (gross) experiment. I licked the spoon after measuring greek yoghurt. Instead of swallowing it, I spat (yes spat!) it into the bowl. It was 7g. Interesting.
That's gross! I had a good laugh tho.
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Any pink food doesn't have calories. Pink donuts, pink cakes and pink biscuits being the most obvious example.0
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LOL...happy to see im not the only one who thinks like this..0
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i once heard a girl saying toasted bread has no calories because it was toasted. fo real.0
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