I really, really need help. It's becoming too tough.
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Plateaus are totally normal. Give yourself a break. The only things that have gotten me through is learning to love myself the way I am and making the decision to change. Beating up on yourself only makes it worse.
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It's going to be okay. It seems like it won't be but I've been where you've been before (not exactly of course since we're all different but I also had an eating disorder). It takes a lot of strength to be able to talk to your family, friends and or a doctor but if you do then you can start to get the help you need. I hope you will be able to ask for help in order to one day be on the other side.0
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Your Username is IWANTTOHOLDON..... just that alone tells me you are not just the girl with ED. You have courage... USE IT! 0
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iwantoholdon wrote: »Your feelings toward seeing a doctor are 100% normal. It takes major guts to make that first appointment. I know this from experience. I can also tell you it was one of the best things I ever did.
Best of luck to you.
I feel kind of relieved. I'm really taking all of your replies to heart so thank you.
Are you seeing a new doctor or one you have a previous relationship with? I only ask because of your age. I'm just thinking that if you are still seeing a pediatrician then maybe starting new with a new doctor would be good. But, please do whatever you feel comfortable with!0 -
Something else that really works for me is indulging every now and then. I was on the verge of a breakdown yesterday so I had 2 slices of pizza and a glass of wine. I still lost 2 pounds over the last week. It's tough but don't give up!!0
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It's calories in, calories out. Simple science. You are overestimating what you eat. Eat less.
More protein will help you more for ascetics with how your body looks. You have a goal for a number on a scale. This is useless only the total calories are going to matter.
Do you track all your calories? have a food scale and an accurate body scale?-1 -
chelsy0587 wrote: »Your Username is IWANTTOHOLDON..... just that alone tells me you are not just the girl with ED. You have courage... USE IT!
Ahh this made me tear up. Thank you ♥0 -
iwantoholdon wrote: »Your feelings toward seeing a doctor are 100% normal. It takes major guts to make that first appointment. I know this from experience. I can also tell you it was one of the best things I ever did.
Best of luck to you.
I feel kind of relieved. I'm really taking all of your replies to heart so thank you.
Are you seeing a new doctor or one you have a previous relationship with? I only ask because of your age. I'm just thinking that if you are still seeing a pediatrician then maybe starting new with a new doctor would be good. But, please do whatever you feel comfortable with!
Yeah this idea did go through my mind. I think it would be really benificial0 -
Cookiejo2270 wrote: »Something else that really works for me is indulging every now and then. I was on the verge of a breakdown yesterday so I had 2 slices of pizza and a glass of wine. I still lost 2 pounds over the last week. It's tough but don't give up!!
Thank you I'll keep that in mind. 0 -
Of_Monsters_and_Meat wrote: »It's calories in, calories out. Simple science. You are overestimating what you eat. Eat less.
More protein will help you more for ascetics with how your body looks. You have a goal for a number on a scale. This is useless only the total calories are going to matter.
Do you track all your calories? have a food scale and an accurate body scale?
I do not, no. I'm a new child into logging calories.
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@Of_Monsters_and_Meat @Cookiejo2270 Have you even been reading the thread?0
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Oh, look at all the people who want to help!!
First of all, BE INCREDIBLY HAPPY on losing 35 pounds! That's more than a few sizes - the loss must show all over and you should be very proud !!
Secondly, if you REALLY do not want to see a doctor, call the hotline (a great suggestion!), or find someone you can confide in........believe me, talking HELPS. I know this for a fact. It will ease your pain and get you back on track and focused.
Best of Luck to you !!!! We stress and are so hard on ourselves. We need to be kinder to ourselves.
I asked my husband once (teasingly) who he loved the most in the entire world. He said himself. It took me by surprise, but that is the correct answer. He's not selfish or self-centered at all. We should love ourselves first......the rest will follow.
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Please take a look at these links. There's help out there. I know how scary it can be to admit your disorder to anyone, but if you don't deal with it head on, it will haunt you for the rest of your life. You're ill, and you need help recovering. Your family wants you to be healthy. Be brave and talk to someone.
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/information-referral-helpline
http://www.anad.org/eating-disorders-get-help/eating-disorders-helpline-email/
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/0 -
Mammabear49 wrote: »Oh, look at all the people who want to help!!
First of all, BE INCREDIBLY HAPPY on losing 35 pounds! That's more than a few sizes - the loss must show all over and you should be very proud !!
Secondly, if you REALLY do not want to see a doctor, call the hotline (a great suggestion!), or find someone you can confide in........believe me, talking HELPS. I know this for a fact. It will ease your pain and get you back on track and focused.
Best of Luck to you !!!! We stress and are so hard on ourselves. We need to be kinder to ourselves.
I asked my husband once (teasingly) who he loved the most in the entire world. He said himself. It took me by surprise, but that is the correct answer. He's not selfish or self-centered at all. We should love ourselves first......the rest will follow.
I do feel loved
Thank you. I don't want to see the doctor at all, but I'm guessing I have to so I can recover. I'm going to call a hotline for sure and talk to someone. I've been bottling it all up too much. Thanks for the kind wishes
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Please take a look at these links. There's help out there. I know how scary it can be to admit your disorder to anyone, but if you don't deal with it head on, it will haunt you for the rest of your life. You're ill, and you need help recovering. Your family wants you to be healthy. Be brave and talk to someone.
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/information-referral-helpline
http://www.anad.org/eating-disorders-get-help/eating-disorders-helpline-email/
http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/
Thank you so much
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iwantoholdon wrote: »I can make the appointment private, that's fine. But my Mom and I have a strong bond and I don't want to destroy it by hiding something like this from her.. And I don't want to destroy it by telling her this either. Sorry, I'm probably coming off as stubborn. I'm just trying to find a way to tell my doctor and not feel guilty
I'll tell you a couple family stories that might release you from some guilt.
When my son was twelve he started to exhibit the first signs of a potentially debilitating mental illness. Being a teen, he desperately wanted to keep his personal stuff private. But I nearly had a mental breakdown from trying to deal on my own. I finally cracked and called in the "troops" to get the help we needed. (I racked up a stack of business cards a half-inch thick). It was two years of hard labour and my daughter put her own teenage angst on hold for those two years, but we got the help we needed. That experience changed me. Nothing is private any more, much to my children's chagrin.
But at the same time I think it is perfectly fine to open up to your doctor about this problem while saying nothing to your mom. I sense you are ready to implode. Call out now.
The other story is about when I was in my late thirties and brought a second kitten home. I was a single parent, independent, and living on my own. Dad, whom I deeply admire, had advised against any more pets, but I got one anyways. When dad came over for a visit and saw a ginger streak go by, he cursed. And then nothing more was said about it. I had this impressive revelation (probably a little late I am sure) that parents ultimately have no control over their adult children's decisions. It's my life. I own it, and I live with the consequences. It was quite a liberating thought.
I don't think it is a betrayal in any sense of the word to get help on your own and keep your mom out of it for now. She will have to accept your reasons because you are an adult now. And I don't think it will destroy your bond. Moms are forever. I know this on experience.0 -
iwantoholdon wrote: »I can make the appointment private, that's fine. But my Mom and I have a strong bond and I don't want to destroy it by hiding something like this from her.. And I don't want to destroy it by telling her this either. Sorry, I'm probably coming off as stubborn. I'm just trying to find a way to tell my doctor and not feel guilty
I'll tell you a couple family stories that might release you from some guilt.
When my son was twelve he started to exhibit the first signs of a potentially debilitating mental illness. Being a teen, he desperately wanted to keep his personal stuff private. But I nearly had a mental breakdown from trying to deal on my own. I finally cracked and called in the "troops" to get the help we needed. (I racked up a stack of business cards a half-inch thick). It was two years of hard labour and my daughter put her own teenage angst on hold for those two years, but we got the help we needed. That experience changed me. Nothing is private any more, much to my children's chagrin.
But at the same time I think it is perfectly fine to open up to your doctor about this problem while saying nothing to your mom. I sense you are ready to implode. Call out now.
The other story is about when I was in my late thirties and brought a second kitten home. I was a single parent, independent, and living on my own. Dad, whom I deeply admire, had advised against any more pets, but I got one anyways. When dad came over for a visit and saw a ginger streak go by, he cursed. And then nothing more was said about it. I had this impressive revelation (probably a little late I am sure) that parents ultimately have no control over their adult children's decisions. It's my life. I own it, and I live with the consequences. It was quite a liberating thought.
I don't think it is a betrayal in any sense of the word to get help on your own and keep your mom out of it for now. She will have to accept your reasons because you are an adult now. And I don't think it will destroy your bond. Moms are forever. I know this on experience.
Thank you very much. I agree, I hope I can do this.
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iwantoholdon wrote: »I hope you will see that by writing it down in an anonymous forum like this that you have permission to call your doctor. Can you work it out so this treatment is private, only between you and your doctor? Every patient has privacy rights. Unless the doctor's receptionist is your mother.
I can make the appointment private, that's fine. But my Mom and I have a strong bond and I don't want to destroy it by hiding something like this from her.. And I don't want to destroy it by telling her this either. Sorry, I'm probably coming off as stubborn. I'm just trying to find a way to tell my doctor and not feel guilty
Talk to your mom. Tell her what you have said here. "Mom, you and I have a strong relationship and I value that so much. I have something to tell you but I'm afraid you will be disappointed in me, but I don't want to keep a secret from you."
If my daughter came to me like that, there is no way I would be upset with her.0 -
We know you can do this! Look how far you've come just by opening up on here! That's a big step, and you should be proud.
You've got this, and we've got your back.0 -
Calliope610 wrote: »iwantoholdon wrote: »I hope you will see that by writing it down in an anonymous forum like this that you have permission to call your doctor. Can you work it out so this treatment is private, only between you and your doctor? Every patient has privacy rights. Unless the doctor's receptionist is your mother.
I can make the appointment private, that's fine. But my Mom and I have a strong bond and I don't want to destroy it by hiding something like this from her.. And I don't want to destroy it by telling her this either. Sorry, I'm probably coming off as stubborn. I'm just trying to find a way to tell my doctor and not feel guilty
Talk to your mom. Tell her what you have said here. "Mom, you and I have a strong relationship and I value that so much. I have something to tell you but I'm afraid you will be disappointed in me, but I don't want to keep a secret from you."
If my daughter came to me like that, there is no way I would be upset with her.
I think I should.. The thing stopping me is, " Oh I'm a few months clean why don't I just recover on my own without telling anyone? " So it's making this hard. Thank you though.
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