Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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Heartisalonelyhunter wrote: »azulvioleta6 wrote: »Heartisalonelyhunter wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I also dislike baby showers. Where you all sit there and ohh and ahh over clothes that will just be puked on anyhow.
ps I have no kids, shocker right?
Next time try paying more attention to the politics behind it, you'll have more fun. The baby shower isn't about the baby, so much as it's a competition between grandmothers to see who can outdo the other. Bonus if you have a competitive aunt-to-be or two in the mix. Who spent the most, who got the best reaction to their gift, who didn't show/left early/got there late. If the grandma's don't like each other, or one or both doesn't like the other one's kid, you can play passive-aggressive comment bingo. If there are step-grandma's involved, it may be even more entertaining, especially if the step-grandma is the more responsible or involved than the bio grandma.
Oh, yes, you are so right! I AM the step-grandma and I'm by choice the LEAST involved. The other 2 grandmas are in constant competition. I find it highly amusing. At my step-daugther's baby shower for her 2nd baby I gave her three free professional house-cleaning sessions. Needless to say, I WON that shower! I got the best reaction from that gift and I took a smug satisfaction in it. (big confession there because I'm not normally like that; lots of issues and family dynamics involved)
Baby showers for second babies are a huge pet peeve of mine
I have several friends that have had one, I have never attended a single one
Feel like I have to defend myself here, and I don't even know why. I had a shower for my second, my kids are almost six years apart first one is a boy and the second is a girl. I had given most of our baby stuff away to friends, and I needed supplies. My friends offered and I wasn't going to say no.
You don't have to defend yourself. I chose not to do one this time because I have a lot of kids ( and I kept a lot of stuff) plus I'm pretty old so all my friends have stopped having kids and gave me all their old baby stuff. But if your friends offered and you want to do it then just ignore people with ridiculous opinions. I hope you had fun!
It's not an opinion, it is a basic social rule in the United States. Showers are meant to welcome a woman to motherhood, not to be an infinite gift-grab for someone who doesn't want to fund their own baby supplies. For subsequent babies, people will give gifts if they want to, but trying to create a social obligation for that to happen is very tacky.
Look it up in any etiquette book.
I think if anyone needs an etiquette book, it's you. And it is an opinion.
It appears that you may need to look up the actual definition of "etiquette."
I have several etiquette books that I use as references. My parents did bother to teach me basic etiquette, but since 3/4 of my family is from outside of the United States, I like to double check when less-common situations arise. I'm the person who grew up eating pizza with a fork, after all.
This one is my favorite:
amazon.com/Manners-Excruciatingly-Correct-Behavior-Freshly/dp/0393058743/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1429214946&sr=1-1&keywords=miss+manners+guide+to+excruciatingly+correct+behavior0 -
noobletmcnugget wrote: »I don't understand having a baby shower before you've given birth...
So you don't lose the baby in all the toilet paper from the games they play.0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I also dislike baby showers. Where you all sit there and ohh and ahh over clothes that will just be puked on anyhow.
ps I have no kids, shocker right?
Next time try paying more attention to the politics behind it, you'll have more fun. The baby shower isn't about the baby, so much as it's a competition between grandmothers to see who can outdo the other. Bonus if you have a competitive aunt-to-be or two in the mix. Who spent the most, who got the best reaction to their gift, who didn't show/left early/got there late. If the grandma's don't like each other, or one or both doesn't like the other one's kid, you can play passive-aggressive comment bingo. If there are step-grandma's involved, it may be even more entertaining, especially if the step-grandma is the more responsible or involved than the bio grandma.
Oh, yes, you are so right! I AM the step-grandma and I'm by choice the LEAST involved. The other 2 grandmas are in constant competition. I find it highly amusing. At my step-daugther's baby shower for her 2nd baby I gave her three free professional house-cleaning sessions. Needless to say, I WON that shower! I got the best reaction from that gift and I took a smug satisfaction in it. (big confession there because I'm not normally like that; lots of issues and family dynamics involved)
Baby showers for second babies are a huge pet peeve of mine
I have several friends that have had one, I have never attended a single one
Feel like I have to defend myself here, and I don't even know why. I had a shower for my second, my kids are almost six years apart first one is a boy and the second is a girl. I had given most of our baby stuff away to friends, and I needed supplies. My friends offered and I wasn't going to say no.
No you don't. Emily Post approves of showers for every baby, it's only a recent thing for people to take issue with them. It makes more sense to have them, anyway. These days, it's not safe to recycle things like car seats and strollers, and the only way you can reuse the baby clothes is if you have the same gender born in the same 1-2 month timeframe as the first one, or you'll be stuck trying to dress a girl in long sleeved sweaters covered in dump trucks in August.
^ Then again only a few of us on this thread would know what the heck it meant.
I agree! That sentence amused me as well.0 -
Just to throw in my two cents, I have no issue with two baby showers if the genders are different. Baby gear today tends to be so gender specific. Back when that etiquette was put in place, baby stuff was more neutral.
Throwing your own shower is still no go.
I don't really enjoy wedding or baby showers, so I tend to pass unless it is for a very close friend. And I dread kid birthday parties.
I just go for the cake. I REALLY like cake.
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I feel like a loser because I don't ever really have any GOOD confessions for this oh, so worthy thread, but here goes.
Confession 1: I packed an awesome lunch today and wanted to devour it before 11 this morning. I don't take lunch until 1. I managed to make it until noon, but now I'm sad because my food is over. I often get sad when my food is over.
Confession 2: I totally had Dr. Pepper last night with my Auntie Anne's pretzel bites and didn't log it. Oops.
My youngest (8) has a bad habit of taking bites out of her lunch why she packs it. The school policy is no junk food (crisps/chips, chocolate, cookies/biscuits) so it's not like it's something sweet. Came down stairs yesterday and she had half her sandwich gone. This was after her breakfast.
Errrrr, what?! How is that even enforced and why? I'm all for encouraging healthy habits, but this seems a bit extreme.
To promote Healthy Eating. I currently live in Ireland and every child packs their lunch (school does not provide lunch/hot lunch in primary school/grade school). It's only been in affect for the last 5ish years. They get to take a treat for special occasions like if they are swimming for the term or going on a field trip etc.0 -
Just to throw in my two cents, I have no issue with two baby showers if the genders are different. Baby gear today tends to be so gender specific. Back when that etiquette was put in place, baby stuff was more neutral.
Throwing your own shower is still no go.
I don't really enjoy wedding or baby showers, so I tend to pass unless it is for a very close friend. And I dread kid birthday parties.
I just go for the cake. I REALLY like cake.
Agreed. If there's no cake, what's the point?0 -
I had never heard of a gender reveal party until this thread either. I know I'm a little out of the kiddie stuff loop, but I don't think we do those here.
I'm just dreading the day my SO's kids start reproducing and I have to produce the appropriate cooing. Fortunately there are two grandmothers so I hope I can just be in the background... waaaaay in the background.0 -
AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »noobletmcnugget wrote: »I don't understand having a baby shower before you've given birth...
So you don't lose the baby in all the toilet paper from the games they play.
Now it makes sense!0 -
Just to throw in my two cents, I have no issue with two baby showers if the genders are different. Baby gear today tends to be so gender specific. Back when that etiquette was put in place, baby stuff was more neutral.
Throwing your own shower is still no go.
I don't really enjoy wedding or baby showers, so I tend to pass unless it is for a very close friend. And I dread kid birthday parties.
I just go for the cake. I REALLY like cake.
Agreed. If there's no cake, what's the point?
I don't even like going to my own nieces' (2 and 9)/nephew's (6) parties. lol I go because they always have good food and ice cream cake.0 -
noobletmcnugget wrote: »I don't understand having a baby shower before you've given birth...
Because you'll have most of the stuff you need before the baby arrives. I figure it makes it easier on the parents-to-be. (?)0 -
I had never heard of a gender reveal party until this thread either. I know I'm a little out of the kiddie stuff loop, but I don't think we do those here.
I'm just dreading the day my SO's kids start reproducing and I have to produce the appropriate cooing. Fortunately there are two grandmothers so I hope I can just be in the background... waaaaay in the background.
They are a more recent thing, and not everyone does them, just a select type of people. I want to keep with the "no judgment" aspect of the thread, so I have to stop typing now.0 -
I had never heard of a gender reveal party until this thread either. I know I'm a little out of the kiddie stuff loop, but I don't think we do those here.
Some people do parties, others do it creatively and post it to Facebook. A friend of mine is having her third boy. She and her husband shot their sons with blue silly string and filmed it. I thought it was cute.
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I have a (please don't judge me) question about hard boiled eggs.
Do you use a 'hard boiled egg' (say usda or whatever entry) for your hard boiled egg (weighing it of course) or do you just use a raw entry for the eggs you buy? I buy large eggs that say 70 calories per egg, but with the hard boiled listing it's now 78 calories.
So water adds 8 calories?! That seems unfair and faintly reminds me of another thread on this site.
I really didn't know which one to use! I figured too that cooking it didn't actually add calories but there were hard boiled egg listings so I was like well ...
What's the other thread, worth reading?
Ask @AgentOrangeJuice . I'm sure he remembers.
To be honest, I think I've done both (raw and hard boiled entries) but I was dumb and weighed with the shell on, even though I'm pretty sure no matter how hungry I am, I'm not going to eat it with the shell. I was surprised at how much of a difference there is in egg weights. It's something I never really even considered before. Kind of like with apples.
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New confession #1: I'm obsessed with Jeni's ice cream to the point that I even professed my love for it (Brown Butter Almond Brittle flavor, to be precise) in my profile on a dating app. I met my now-boyfriend through that app and think I have created a monster. He confessed last night that he bought a pint of chocolate flavor Jeni's ice cream, ate 2/3 of it, and then threw the rest away to keep himself from finishing it.
New confession #2: As my now-boyfriend was confessing this to me, all I could think about was how perfect it was for this thread. MFP is taking over my life!0 -
Once a few years back I felt so horrible about myself that I went to one of those laser lypo places. Had my bank account not laughed at the quote I can't say I wouldn't have gone through with it.
After that, multiple times I have found myself considering bulemia... it scares me every time I catch my thoughts going that way.0 -
noobletmcnugget wrote: »I don't understand having a baby shower before you've given birth...
Because you'll have most of the stuff you need before the baby arrives. I figure it makes it easier on the parents-to-be. (?)
I know, but it must be absolutely awful if anything happened...0 -
quiksylver296 wrote: »I can eat an entire Box of cereal so I can't have cereal in the house! Not proud of that at all, self control where are u?
@hschnirel I can relate! I can't and usually don't keep the sugary yummy cereals in the house. The most risque one I have now is Honey Nut Cheerios AND that I could put a world of hurtin' on... lol
Marshmallow Fruit Loops. I can eat a box of those in a day.... Mmmmmmm
I was not aware those existed. Maybe it's good I didn't know. @quiksylver296 what have you done?!
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I feel like a loser because I don't ever really have any GOOD confessions for this oh, so worthy thread, but here goes.
Confession 1: I packed an awesome lunch today and wanted to devour it before 11 this morning. I don't take lunch until 1. I managed to make it until noon, but now I'm sad because my food is over. I often get sad when my food is over.
Confession 2: I totally had Dr. Pepper last night with my Auntie Anne's pretzel bites and didn't log it. Oops.
My youngest (8) has a bad habit of taking bites out of her lunch why she packs it. The school policy is no junk food (crisps/chips, chocolate, cookies/biscuits) so it's not like it's something sweet. Came down stairs yesterday and she had half her sandwich gone. This was after her breakfast.
Errrrr, what?! How is that even enforced and why? I'm all for encouraging healthy habits, but this seems a bit extreme.
I don't have kids but it bothers me that schools try to dictate what parents can and can't feed their children. I get the "peanut free" for allergies, but if someone wants to include a few chips in their child's lunch, they should be able to do that.
Actually the no nut bothers me more. Because it is not like my child is going to force feed her Peanut butter sandwich to someone else. Sorry just a rant. My child was picky and peanut butter was her thing. And no the child only had allergies if she ate nuts not contact. When they get to secondary school policies change and most kids leave campus for lunch.0 -
@AgentOrangeJuice what is this thread that @MoHousdon speaks of? I'm totally curious now. Please don't let it be a thread that's gonna make me feel like a moron.0
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fitfatty88 wrote: »I apparently missed out on the rule book for baby showers...
My two siblings and I put together my sisters baby shower. Granted I actually organized the entire thing and they just helped pay for it, but it was pretty awesome. I made practical gift baskets -- makeup, candy, at home spa supplies, cozy socks, etc. and the girls were actually fighting to win the games so they could win a basket.
I also helped organize her second baby shower after she lost her first child. And she was ecstatic that her friends would come together and share in her joy of the second child. I was happy I could give her another party worth remembering that wasn't followed up by heartache. So screw your rule book.
^^^THIS I LOVE
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noobletmcnugget wrote: »noobletmcnugget wrote: »I don't understand having a baby shower before you've given birth...
Because you'll have most of the stuff you need before the baby arrives. I figure it makes it easier on the parents-to-be. (?)
I know, but it must be absolutely awful if anything happened...
True, I honestly had not thought of that.0 -
rungirl1973 wrote: »Gender reveal parties are also awkward for me. I went to one for cousin and his wife last year and I was so bored because a lot of their friends were there and I didn't know anyone. lol Plus, I'm 24 and they're in their 30s with kids and careers, so we had basically nothing in common.
I was so mad when my aunt posted a picture to Facebook of my cousin revealing the pink cupcake for a girl with me in the background at the party looking pissed off. It's like, "You couldn't have cropped me out??" lol I hate that picture so much.
This thread introduced me to the gender reveal party. I had never heard of that before.
When I had my kids, I wanted to be surprised.
I know of them because we have a few bakers in the family who get hit up to make cakes and such for them, and add them to their portfolios if they're interesting. I don't actually know anyone who's had one. We've had 8 babies in the family in the past year or so, and every single one of them couldn't wait to post the ultrasound on fb. No way they were going to sit on that info a second longer than they had to.0 -
azulvioleta6 wrote: »azulvioleta6 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »I also dislike baby showers. Where you all sit there and ohh and ahh over clothes that will just be puked on anyhow.
ps I have no kids, shocker right?
Next time try paying more attention to the politics behind it, you'll have more fun. The baby shower isn't about the baby, so much as it's a competition between grandmothers to see who can outdo the other. Bonus if you have a competitive aunt-to-be or two in the mix. Who spent the most, who got the best reaction to their gift, who didn't show/left early/got there late. If the grandma's don't like each other, or one or both doesn't like the other one's kid, you can play passive-aggressive comment bingo. If there are step-grandma's involved, it may be even more entertaining, especially if the step-grandma is the more responsible or involved than the bio grandma.
Oh, yes, you are so right! I AM the step-grandma and I'm by choice the LEAST involved. The other 2 grandmas are in constant competition. I find it highly amusing. At my step-daugther's baby shower for her 2nd baby I gave her three free professional house-cleaning sessions. Needless to say, I WON that shower! I got the best reaction from that gift and I took a smug satisfaction in it. (big confession there because I'm not normally like that; lots of issues and family dynamics involved)
Baby showers for second babies are a huge pet peeve of mine
I have several friends that have had one, I have never attended a single one
Feel like I have to defend myself here, and I don't even know why. I had a shower for my second, my kids are almost six years apart first one is a boy and the second is a girl. I had given most of our baby stuff away to friends, and I needed supplies. My friends offered and I wasn't going to say no.
In terms of etiquette, the only thing worse than having a shower for a second baby is throwing your own shower or having a relative throw one for you.
Major faux pas.
I agree that people shouldn't be planning their own showers.
But why can't relatives? And if someone is throwing a person a second shower, are they just supposed to say "no"?
Because showers are gift grabs. Having close relatives ask for gifts on your behalf is crass.
I disagree- if someone, friend or family member, would like to throw someone s baby shower then by all means they can do so! I know when my cousins have more babies I get excited! Not necessarily for the shower itself but because I'm happy they're having the children they want if it someone wants to celebrate that whether it be their 5th or 6th child then PARTY ON!0 -
Gender reveal parties are also awkward for me. I went to one for cousin and his wife last year and I was so bored because a lot of their friends were there and I didn't know anyone. lol Plus, I'm 24 and they're in their 30s with kids and careers, so we had basically nothing in common.
I was so mad when my aunt posted a picture to Facebook of my cousin revealing the pink cupcake for a girl with me in the background at the party looking pissed off. It's like, "You couldn't have cropped me out??" lol I hate that picture so much.
I do not get the gender reveal parties. If you want to have cake, have cake and invite me over, but please don't make it some awkward event that people don't really enjoy.
I unfortunately will be attending one of these awkward festivals for my grandchild. I'd rather just see the sonogram showing a wee-wee or not. And make sure you bring me cake.
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quiksylver296 wrote: »I can eat an entire Box of cereal so I can't have cereal in the house! Not proud of that at all, self control where are u?
@hschnirel I can relate! I can't and usually don't keep the sugary yummy cereals in the house. The most risque one I have now is Honey Nut Cheerios AND that I could put a world of hurtin' on... lol
Marshmallow Fruit Loops. I can eat a box of those in a day.... Mmmmmmm
I was not aware those existed. Maybe it's good I didn't know. @quiksylver296 what have you done?!
Think Fruit Loops with lucky Charms marshmallows added....OH YEAH!0 -
My confession today is that I chew the skin around my nails on my fingers, when I'm not chewing them I pick them. It looks gross and it hurts but I can't stop doing it. I'm nearly 33 and have been doing it since I was about 11. Every now and again I stop it but then I always start up again. Nasty habit!
I do this too. My fingers look a mess, but I haven't been able to stop. I don't bite my nails as much as I used to, but I still pick at the skin. I've been doing it for as long as I can remember and it gets worse if I'm anxious or stressed. I'm embarrassed to let people see my hands.
And it doesn't help that I live in a dry climate so my skin is always rough (I try to use lotion, but it's not enough).
i peel layers of skin off of the bottoms of my feet and heels. sometimes i rip off too much, hit raw flesh then end up with a slight limp for a few days while it heals....0 -
Okay, so I logged in today because I need to confess a terrible binge last night--I'm still feeling sick! I need to get it off my chest so I can move on.....I had two single serve bags of lays chips dipped in about 1/2 a small container of sour cream, several servings of kettle corn (I don't know how much because I ate out of the bag and finished it), brown rice with cheese melted all over it (this was supposed to be the dinner part of the evening), a slice of cherry pie and a gin and tonic. Ugh.....my stomach still hurts and I'm hating myself too.....
Thank you all for listening--hopefully, now I can let go and move on!0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »I also dislike baby showers. Where you all sit there and ohh and ahh over clothes that will just be puked on anyhow.
ps I have no kids, shocker right?
I'm the same- it's like throwing a birthday party for someone when it's not their birthday yet! Haha I get all butthurt over them but I go because I love my family and friends. Plus when I have kids one day they will be obligated to reciprocate!
It's not necessarily the shower part that bugs me, sometimes those games are Just. So. Awful.
They are TERRIBLE and STUPID! My best friends threw a shower for me when I had my son, and we did not play games. Some other not as close friends threw me a shower when I had my daughter, and they had games. I wanted to scream, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Don't get me wrong, I was very thankful for the shower and the gifts!
Another complaint regarding baby showers: Buy what's on the DAMN registry! That's why parents register, and some of us put ALOT of thought into what we need! Just because you saw the cutest little outfit does NOT mean you have to buy it! Rant over!
My baby showers were awesome because my friends and family know me so well. Everyone came and brought food! Instead of games, we just all sat around a big table, ate a bunch of yummy food and passed around the baby. It was really no different than if we had all met somewhere for coffee. Perfection!0 -
I am shaky hungry, like that low blood sugar feeling... This may screw up my entire day. I don't have many choices for food. (Packet of oatmeal might work. Please let a packet of oatmeal work!)0
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I will only eat food that has the calories printed on the packaging, so that I can log as accurately as humanly possible... I am terrified of getting it wrong...!
This thread kept me occupied up until dinner time, thank you!0
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