Four bags of Oreos

Hubby and I had "the discussion" about eating more sensibly and healthier, and less junk food, etc, etc, etc, this weekend. (He has more weight to lose than I do.) Thought we were on the same page, until he came home from the grocery store this evening with four bags of Oreos, chocolate ice cream, eight pounds of pork sausage patties, and a supersize bag of generic Reese's pieces cereal.

I'm not even sure we're in the same book, much less on the same page. How do you handle these situations??
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Replies

  • Vanilla_Lattes
    Vanilla_Lattes Posts: 251 Member
    Maybe he wants to fit them into his calorie goals?
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
    edited May 2015
    Since your husband is a grown adult, I suggest doing what I had to do - lead by example, by cooking tasty yet healthful meals (if you're the one that cooks, that is) and politely refusing any junk.

    It's amazing how many people I've turned that way. It took time, but it always works.
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  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
    That being said, the pork sausage patties are probably the healthiest item of the lot.
  • dlw3f9
    dlw3f9 Posts: 1 Member
    If that was all he came home with then I would be angry. If he came home with other food that was healthy then I wouldnt be as mad. That combination gives me an upset stomach thinking about. On a bad day though I could eat a whole bag of oreos by myself and not bat an eye! Lol.
  • reynolds3371
    reynolds3371 Posts: 7 Member
    He can eat all of that food in moderation by keeping it under his calorie count for the day and logging everything in
  • APeacefulWarrior
    APeacefulWarrior Posts: 86 Member
    Since your husband is a grown adult, I suggest doing what I had to do - lead by example, by cooking tasty yet healthful meals (if you're the one that cooks, that is) and politely refusing any junk.

    It's amazing how many people I've turned that way. It took time, but it always works.

    He pretty much won't eat anything I cook - he grew up in the restaurant business and as a young cook, it was all about fat, sugar, and salt. I grew up in a household where my parents tried to eat healthy (blood pressure issues are pretty prevalent in my family), so I like flavor, but can't afford a lot of calories from fat - and sugar? Well he's diabetic and sugar really makes me feel awful in a number of ways, so neither of us need a lot of sugar. Salt in moderation (I have high blood pressure and processed foods are SO full of salt that when I eat a home cooked meal, I'd rather be able to add it at the table.

    I do politely refuse... he tells me I'm being militant. Sigh...
  • GiGiBeans
    GiGiBeans Posts: 1,062 Member
    Ha sounds like my husband. He use to eat cookies & candy everyday so eating it every other day is his idea of healthier and more sensibly. To make matters worse, he's diabetic. I just tell him "don't expect me to wheel your butt around when your legs fall off". He tells me it will help my upper body development if I do. One needs to keep a sense of humor in a marriage.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    You don't have to eat more than you want of those things- or any of it. It is your dh's choice to eat those foods or not. Maybe he feels some can fit in his eating plan. Put them away and do your own thing. It is possible that your dh isn't ready to lose weight.

    My dh brought cookies home today. It wasn't part of my plan so I said I would save one for tomorrow. Dh and dd ate their cookies. I ate some popcorn that I really wanted.
  • 85kurtz
    85kurtz Posts: 276 Member
    That's hard. Can you return the produce to the store? Perhaps you and your husband need to sit down and make a shopping list and don't detour from it?
  • APeacefulWarrior
    APeacefulWarrior Posts: 86 Member
    That being said, the pork sausage patties are probably the healthiest item of the lot.

    The patties have a preservative that's pretty much banned in every country in the world except the US. So no, not really... although I hear what you're saying.
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
    Since your husband is a grown adult, I suggest doing what I had to do - lead by example, by cooking tasty yet healthful meals (if you're the one that cooks, that is) and politely refusing any junk.

    It's amazing how many people I've turned that way. It took time, but it always works.

    He pretty much won't eat anything I cook - he grew up in the restaurant business and as a young cook, it was all about fat, sugar, and salt. I grew up in a household where my parents tried to eat healthy (blood pressure issues are pretty prevalent in my family), so I like flavor, but can't afford a lot of calories from fat - and sugar? Well he's diabetic and sugar really makes me feel awful in a number of ways, so neither of us need a lot of sugar. Salt in moderation (I have high blood pressure and processed foods are SO full of salt that when I eat a home cooked meal, I'd rather be able to add it at the table.

    I do politely refuse... he tells me I'm being militant. Sigh...

    I am pre-diabetic, and my parent is a Type 1. As someone who works in the healthcare industry, I have seen the terrible effects of chronically high blood glucose. Continue to be 'militant' because those foods are completely off the table for medical reasons. It's mostly sugars and starches that non-insulin dependent diabetics (and some insulin-dependent diabetics) should avoid in mass quantity.

    Some Type 2s won't get it until it's too late. :(
  • Lorsmith44
    Lorsmith44 Posts: 4 Member
    edited May 2015
    It is so hard when one person brings stuff into the house when the other is trying not to eat that stuff... I know how that is. I have a skinny hubby who thinks he can eat sweets and fats like they are going out of style. But cholesterol is not his friend, so we both should be watching what we eat.
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member
    That being said, the pork sausage patties are probably the healthiest item of the lot.

    The patties have a preservative that's pretty much banned in every country in the world except the US. So no, not really... although I hear what you're saying.

    Haha, yes, I get it. I avoid preservatives in my sausage patties as well.
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  • knt217
    knt217 Posts: 115 Member
    Since your husband is a grown adult, I suggest doing what I had to do - lead by example, by cooking tasty yet healthful meals (if you're the one that cooks, that is) and politely refusing any junk.

    It's amazing how many people I've turned that way. It took time, but it always works.

    This. My husband is a grown man, and if he wants to sit next to me and eat a giant bowl of ice cream, that's his thing. I'm doing mine...and I've noticed as time has gone on that he has actually cut down on the excess he eats at night. Lead by example. You can do it.
  • APeacefulWarrior
    APeacefulWarrior Posts: 86 Member

    I am pre-diabetic, and my parent is a Type 1. As someone who works in the healthcare industry, I have seen the terrible effects of chronically high blood glucose. Continue to be 'militant' because those foods are completely off the table for medical reasons. It's mostly sugars and starches that non-insulin dependent diabetics (and some insulin-dependent diabetics) should avoid in mass quantity.

    Some Type 2s won't get it until it's too late. :(

    He keeps telling me that his diet must be fine because his blood tests come back fine (meaning his A1c is within acceptable limits for a diabetic on 3 different diabetes meds) Denial? It scares me, but not him...
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  • TahoeSki
    TahoeSki Posts: 69 Member
    No, he's not ready. But that wouldn't stop me from picking up the bag of Oreos and saying WTF! It's really not fair to you to have all that crap in the house.
  • APeacefulWarrior
    APeacefulWarrior Posts: 86 Member
    MrM27 wrote: »

    Which preservative?

    Propyl gallate - and I'll amend my statement because in looking it up, I found a report released in late 2014 that the EU is allowing it back into food processing since they can't pull it completely out of the cosmetics industry.
  • APeacefulWarrior
    APeacefulWarrior Posts: 86 Member
    MrM27 wrote: »

    Which preservative?

    Propyl gallate - and I'll amend my statement because in looking it up, I found a report released in late 2014 that the EU is allowing it back into food processing since they can't pull it completely out of the cosmetics industry.
  • FaylinaMeir
    FaylinaMeir Posts: 661 Member
    As much as you want to control your husband (and even if you deny it you kinda are) you really can't. I understand completely how you feel, way back when my husband was the same. Unwilling to change and etc but I just ate my healthy food, lost weight and got better. After awhile he decided to follow and now he's in the best shape of his life, just joined the Navy, and lost all his weight.
    I'm not saying your husband will make such a change but it's the little things. You might have to accept he'll never change and if that is something you can deal with, as blunt as crappy as that sounds.
    I do know one thing though, the more you harass your spouse (typically) about changing and their eating habits, the MORE likely they are to go buy 4 packages of oreos just to be spiteful, weather he did that consciously or not.
  • 85kurtz
    85kurtz Posts: 276 Member
    MrM27 wrote: »
    dlw3f9 wrote: »
    If that was all he came home with then I would be angry. If he came home with other food that was healthy then I wouldnt be as mad. That combination gives me an upset stomach thinking about. On a bad day though I could eat a whole bag of oreos by myself and not bat an eye! Lol.

    Does he have to change his eating habits because you did?
    85kurtz wrote: »
    That's hard. Can you return the produce to the store? Perhaps you and your husband need to sit down and make a shopping list and don't detour from it?
    Why does he have to?

    Did you read the original post? It says that both parties had decided on a lifestyle change. He doesn't have to do anything, it is entirely his business. He shouldn't have agreed in the first
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  • kutiekai007
    kutiekai007 Posts: 2 Member
    I just started trying to get healthier about a week ago. Hubby wasn't on board until I gave him a peanut butter (his other wife) protein shake and when he got jealous of my low calorie snacks I went and bought. I told him when he wants to start counting calories he can raid my snack box. He isn't counting them yet but is now asking me to make him shakes for breakfast and healthy lunches lol:) so lead by example.
  • Rampant328
    Rampant328 Posts: 134 Member
    Look up what that type of food is doing to his liver and then explain it to him. The leading by example is a good idea for you but it's not a guarantee that he'll follow in your footsteps. He's using the Oreos to make himself feel better about something. If he exercised, ate right, and got proper sleep, he might feel like a Superman.
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    All things, in moderation.
  • 85kurtz
    85kurtz Posts: 276 Member


    [/quote]

    I did read it. Just because they discussed getting healthier together does that mean the person has to give up foods they love or want just because the other person doesn't want to eat them?[/quote]

    Well I guess your idea of eating healthy food and mine (and the OP's) are very different. That's fine. :open_mouth:
  • APeacefulWarrior
    APeacefulWarrior Posts: 86 Member
    It's so very much more complicated than just this latest issue. Diabetes killed his father, and we're all concerned that he is headed in the same direction. He is also 8 years out from failed WLS, and as for me, I am simply sick and tired of feeling sick and tired (ie, I don't want to become diabetic, I want to lower my bp, and I am not about to just sit back and be a spectator in my own life) This is the latest in our struggles, but I am determined to succeed this time - with or without his support. I know nagging or demanding he change won't work, but I wish he would at least care enough that he would want me to be healthy and then be supportive of my efforts ... but maybe he just can't be...

    I don't know... around his WLS, I made sure I supported him... we're supposed to be in this together, and I hate knowing I'm in it alone, I guess.
  • Carnivor0us
    Carnivor0us Posts: 1,752 Member

    I am pre-diabetic, and my parent is a Type 1. As someone who works in the healthcare industry, I have seen the terrible effects of chronically high blood glucose. Continue to be 'militant' because those foods are completely off the table for medical reasons. It's mostly sugars and starches that non-insulin dependent diabetics (and some insulin-dependent diabetics) should avoid in mass quantity.

    Some Type 2s won't get it until it's too late. :(

    He keeps telling me that his diet must be fine because his blood tests come back fine (meaning his A1c is within acceptable limits for a diabetic on 3 different diabetes meds) Denial? It scares me, but not him...

    Denial. An A1c that's acceptable can be quite a large range. especially for a diabetic that is on 3 different medications...standards for a1c are lowered.

    how long has he been diabetic? Feel free to private message me if you want.