Women do not fullfill me

Options
DayvKnight
DayvKnight Posts: 27 Member
in Chit-Chat
Before people start calling me gay let me tell you that I'm definitely not.
The problem I have is that I just see women as people to sleep with and on the infrequent occasion that I do, I start thinking about trying to find the next one immediately after

I base my happiness on achievement and getting with girls releases dopamine but I reckon that even if I got with over 100 girls I still wouldn't be satisfied and want more.

How do I change my way of thinking?

I am 6'4, 200lbs and my face is maybe a 6/10 on a good day, what type of women should I be aiming for if I decide to look for something more fulfilling such as a relationship?
«13

Replies

  • usernameenvy
    usernameenvy Posts: 140 Member
    Options
    lol i think you're on the wrong site ...
  • GreenGoddess22
    GreenGoddess22 Posts: 3,821 Member
    Options
    usernameenvy wrote: »
    lol i think you're on the wrong site ...

    LMAO

    Well for starters you are only 19. Go live life, have fun, live in the moment. You have your whole life to find "the one".
  • seachelle76
    seachelle76 Posts: 27 Member
    Options
    Start viewing them as human? That would be a start. It's not other people, it's you.
  • DayvKnight
    DayvKnight Posts: 27 Member
    Options
    GreenGoddess22 wrote: »
    usernameenvy wrote: »
    lol i think you're on the wrong site ...

    LMAO

    Well for starters you are only 19. Go live life, have fun, live in the moment. You have your whole life to find "the one".

    I'm not trying to find the one. I don't know if what I'm saying even makes sense, I need to find self fullfillment but I'm trying to get it through women which probably isn't going to work
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
    Options
    There is obviously something going on, or something that HAD gone on in your life to create what professionals call "a hole". You are trying to fill it by sleeping with girls. It will never be filled. It is your job to figure out your issue and fix it, dont expect a female to do that job for you.

    Did your mom leave you at a young age? Did many females in your life pass away while you were growing up? Did you have a female steal from you? Do you hate females? Dont respond - just think about something that could trigger a reaction in regards to your current feeling towards females. Maybe your a sex addict? Get bored easily?
  • DayvKnight
    DayvKnight Posts: 27 Member
    edited May 2015
    Options
    seachelle76 wrote: »
    Start viewing them as human? That would be a start. It's not other people, it's you.

    I know that I am the one who is the problem but I don't know how to change my mentality, it is unhealthy.
    I was at an edm event tonight and I feel normal and relaxed talking to guys but things change when I interact with women, I can only view them as things that I am trying to conquer

  • s_y8s
    s_y8s Posts: 1,849 Member
    Options
    dakotababy wrote: »
    There is obviously something going on, or something that HAD gone on in your life to create what professionals call "a hole". You are trying to fill it by sleeping with girls. It will never be filled. It is your job to figure out your issue and fix it, dont expect a female to do that job for you.

    Did your mom leave you at a young age? Did many females in your life pass away while you were growing up? Did you have a female steal from you? Do you hate females? Dont respond - just think about something that could trigger a reaction in regards to your current feeling towards females. Maybe your a sex addict? Get bored easily?
    I agree! ^^
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,592 Member
    Options
    get your self some serious therapy
  • GreenGoddess22
    GreenGoddess22 Posts: 3,821 Member
    Options
    dakotababy wrote: »
    There is obviously something going on, or something that HAD gone on in your life to create what professionals call "a hole". You are trying to fill it by sleeping with girls. It will never be filled. It is your job to figure out your issue and fix it, dont expect a female to do that job for you.

    Did your mom leave you at a young age? Did many females in your life pass away while you were growing up? Did you have a female steal from you? Do you hate females? Dont respond - just think about something that could trigger a reaction in regards to your current feeling towards females. Maybe your a sex addict? Get bored easily?

    Excellent advice.
  • DayvKnight
    DayvKnight Posts: 27 Member
    Options
    dakotababy wrote: »
    There is obviously something going on, or something that HAD gone on in your life to create what professionals call "a hole". You are trying to fill it by sleeping with girls. It will never be filled. It is your job to figure out your issue and fix it, dont expect a female to do that job for you.

    Did your mom leave you at a young age? Did many females in your life pass away while you were growing up? Did you have a female steal from you? Do you hate females? Dont respond - just think about something that could trigger a reaction in regards to your current feeling towards females. Maybe your a sex addict? Get bored easily?

    I have a bad relationship with my mother
    btw I'm not claiming to be someone who has a lot of success with women but if I'm honest part of the reason why I started lifting is because I thought it would result in me getting with more girls, which wasn't the case

  • fitbunny93
    fitbunny93 Posts: 16 Member
    Options
    What has happened in your life to make you view women this way? I agree with the poster above, something probably happened in your life. Was a female in your life abusive to you, was your mom around during your life? I'm glad you realize that your mindset needs to be fixed. Females are more than just objects to be used and thrown out in a matter of speaking. They aren't prizes for your dopamine fix.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Options
    Do you find yourself wanting to make a dress out of human skin? If not, then I think you're ok.
  • fitbunny93
    fitbunny93 Posts: 16 Member
    Options
    I honestly would recommend seeking a therapist or psychologist. Someone who can help you get to the root of your problems and can help you figure out yourself. I don't think anyone here on mfp can honestly help you in the way you heed.
  • DayvKnight
    DayvKnight Posts: 27 Member
    Options
    OdesAngel wrote: »
    Do you find yourself wanting to make a dress out of human skin? If not, then I think you're ok.

    no, I never want to harm anyone, I only want good things to happen to people
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
    Options
    So if you struggle with your relationship with your mother, there of course is going to be a good chance that you will have issues with women in your future. Are you angry at your mom? Do you want your moms approval? Nurturing feeling from her? Are you searching for this by sleeping with females?

    Again, you dont have to answer. What moms do not provide for us as children are NEVER provided to us through girlfriends/wives (nor should they). This might be something you look into more with a live counsellor, I would always recommend Journalling on the issue at hand and often you will find many answers through that.

    Good luck!
  • DrWhoIsYerDad
    DrWhoIsYerDad Posts: 263 Member
    Options
    Wouldn't hurt to talk to a therapist.
  • DayvKnight
    DayvKnight Posts: 27 Member
    edited May 2015
    Options
    fitbunny93 wrote: »
    What has happened in your life to make you view women this way? I agree with the poster above, something probably happened in your life. Was a female in your life abusive to you, was your mom around during your life? I'm glad you realize that your mindset needs to be fixed. Females are more than just objects to be used and thrown out in a matter of speaking. They aren't prizes for your dopamine fix.

    Yeah, my mother had several health problems and bad depression and used to take her frustration out on me a lot when I was young.

    I base nearly everything in life as an accomplishment, when I'm with other lads I spend time with them because it's fun and we have a laugh. When I'm with girl(s) my mindset changes, I don't know how to fix my mindset as I have never had a different view of them
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
    Options
    you sound like a normal 19 year old
  • usernameenvy
    usernameenvy Posts: 140 Member
    edited May 2015
    Options
    DayvKnight wrote: »
    fitbunny93 wrote: »
    What has happened in your life to make you view women this way? I agree with the poster above, something probably happened in your life. Was a female in your life abusive to you, was your mom around during your life? I'm glad you realize that your mindset needs to be fixed. Females are more than just objects to be used and thrown out in a matter of speaking. They aren't prizes for your dopamine fix.

    Yeah, my mother had several health problems and bad depression and used to take her frustration out on me a lot when I was young.

    I base nearly everything in life as an accomplishment, when I'm with other lads I spend time with them because it's fun and we have a laugh. When I'm with girl(s) my mindset changes, I don't know how to fix my mindset as I have never had a different view of them

    You subconsciously view other females as your mother and the fact your mother had such a hold over you means you feel the need to turn that around when youre with other females ... go see a therapist its the only thing thats going to help you make sense and move on

Categories