Men, what should a woman eat(or not) on the first date?
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1. The title of this thread makes my skin crawl.
2. It saddens me that posts like Cortelli's get picked apart because people are either overly sensitive, have no sense of humor or don't understand sarcasm.
3. As for the animal cruelty talk....the radio station that I listen to in the morning does a segment every week where people call in and say "I went on a date with this great guy/girl. We had an amazing time, but he/she hasn't called/returned my calls". They go into a description of what sounds like a very nice date. Then the DJs call the other person and get their side. In on instance, this woman couldn't understand why the guy didn't call her back. He said it was because she ranted through the whole meal about his food choices. She's a vegetarian and kept making comments about animal carcasses, the flesh he was eating, "I'm sure the cow was happy to die for you", etc. It was a big turn off. He said, "The fact that I told her I had selected a steak house for our date should've clued her in that I was a meat eater. If being a vegetarian is so important to her, she probably should've known right there that I wasn't the guy for her. And if she thought she was going to "convert" me, she went about it the wrong way".
So, OP....no talk of animal carcasses at the table.0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »On our first date my husband took me to see Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter Is Dead and the muffler fell off his car in the parking lot. His mom drove out and switched cars for him while we were watching the movie. I'm not sure what I ate. Probably Sour Patch Kids.
Wow that is an awesome mother to a son.
Yep. Love my mother-in-law
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booksandchocolate12 wrote: »
3. As for the animal cruelty talk....the radio station that I listen to in the morning does a segment every week where people call in and say "I went on a date with this great guy/girl. We had an amazing time, but he/she hasn't called/returned my calls". They go into a description of what sounds like a very nice date. Then the DJs call the other person and get their side. In on instance, this woman couldn't understand why the guy didn't call her back. He said it was because she ranted through the whole meal about his food choices. She's a vegetarian and kept making comments about animal carcasses, the flesh he was eating, "I'm sure the cow was happy to die for you", etc. It was a big turn off. He said, "The fact that I told her I had selected a steak house for our date should've clued her in that I was a meat eater. If being a vegetarian is so important to her, she probably should've known right there that I wasn't the guy for her. And if she thought she was going to "convert" me, she went about it the wrong way".
So, OP....no talk of animal carcasses at the table.
My local station does the same thing. My favorite one so far the girl thought they had a good time and didn't understand why he hadn't called. They talked to the guy and she had been talking about how she was watching her weight, and that was fine. But then when their food arrived she took a bottle of Windex out of her purse and sprayed half of the food with the Windex so she wouldn't eat it. He found that incredibly wasteful, especially considering the price of the entrees, and just really weird.
So, if you don't want to eat your whole meal have it boxed up, don't spray cleaner on it at the table.
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lolwut? You let men tell you what to eat? WHY??? you get what you want. only an abuser or a jerk would try to control your dinner order.0
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rjmudlax13 wrote: »Whitezombiegirl wrote: »I have a few PERSONAL guidelines:
1. Don't eat anything stinky- personally I can't stand fish/ seafood or to be around anyone eating fish, baked beans, scramled eggs or blue cheese. Bleugh, but I would mention it beforehand.
2. Good table manners are a must. Must use a knife and fork properly and not talk with mouth full. No elbows on the table etc.
3. Have some knowledge and appreciation of wine. It's a turn off for me when a man doesn't know anything about wine. No sweet wine - unless with desert.
4. Don't pig out. Guys who stuff themselves on a date are a turn off for me- especially if they are so full afterwards that they get gas and can't move etc. Personally I like to eat light on a date so I'm not too full for 'afterwards'.
5. Don't 'feed' me. This grosses me out. Plus, taking food off my plate to try it- huge turn off.
6. Don't get drunk and sloppy.
7. Lastly- I'm being picky but I don't like it when a guy orders 'dainty' and 'sterotypically feminine' things- yes, it's just my perception. For example- ordering half a pint of larger or a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows etc. It's just my taste but I like a 'real ale and bloody steak' kind of guy.
Oh, and I'm okay with splitting the cheque. You might think some of these things are common sense (table-manners etc.) but I've encountered them on dates in the past. I'm sure loads of people on here have some good horror stories- I'd love to hear them!
Of course, once I'm in a relationship (I'm married)- most of those 'guidelines' go out of the window.
WOW. Glad I never went on a date with a person like you. Number 7 is especially sexist. Imagine if a man said the same thing about a women. Just wow.
She didn't say "men who order 'dainty' and 'sterotypically feminine' things are bad" - she said they are not to her taste.
1. We're allowed to have preferences.
2. Dating is all about evaluating for compatibility and screening out those who aren't.
When I was dating, I put current pictures on my profile. I wouldn't be the least bit offended if men gave me a pass because they preferred slimmer women. They get to have their preferences, as does Whitezombiegirl.
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A few points here:Haven't read all the replies - just the first few. I'll take a different tack with my advice.
This is a *first* date -- remember, you only get one chance to make a first impression. So, you need to focus on maximizing that first impression. And how do you do that? By displaying, through your superior taste and discernment, that you are worldly, tasteful, and most of all *classy*!
So, your challenge starts right with the drinks. Consider a nice bottle of bubbly - cheaper than ordering by the glass and let's you set the tone for the meal. Although I am a California boy, I still say stay away from domestics. A real champagne - from France - is the way to go here. I can see ordering a prosecco or similar sparkling wine, but for God's sake make sure it isn't domestic - nothing says "I'm not classy" like a domestic sparkling.
With the appetizer, I think there are a couple of ways to go. A good foie gras gets things rolling well. And you have a real opportunity to let him know just how discerning you are – I’ve never been more impressed than the time a date asked about the foie gras (be sure to pronounce it correctly as “fwaw graw” with emphasis to enhance the classiness) and turned up her nose when told it was actually duck and not goose! Raw oysters or chilled shellfish are also great choices. You might even pair a foie gras with some chilled oysters or lobster tails. Be sure to ask him what he’s going to have as an appetizer – emphasizing that this is for you, and also being able to veto another choice that clashes with yours.
For soup or salad, I always say “why not both?” A simple Caesar salad – insist on the parmesan begin grated tableside and make sure the anchovies are not a cheap restaurant-supply-company staple in a can – is great, and a small cup of lobster bisque (if you didn’t have lobster as an appetizer) is good. Perhaps a simple tomato soup, so long as the waitstaff is willing to let you spoon your own crème fraiche and will freshly grind pepper for you from a grinder at least 1.5 meters long! Get a bottle of California chardonnay to go with the soup salad combo.
Entrees really are wide open, depending on the type of restaurant you’re visiting. If in doubt, just go for the most expensive item – class isn’t concerned with prices. One thing I’ve found to be really worthwhile is to mix and match your own entrée and sides. For example, a date once wanted to try the seared Ahi tuna steak in a seasame crust served with wasabi-infused mashed potatoes and lightly grilled asparagus drizzled with olive oil. But she was also interested in the filet mignon in a balsamic reduction, with roasted new potatoes with rosemary and buttered / creamed spinach. She insisted on a half portion of the Ahi, light on the seasame crust and cooked well, and a half portion of the filet but with a mushroom sauce instead of the balsamic reduction. She wanted the wasabi-infused mashed potatoes but asked to substitute garlic for the wasabi, and also a lightly stir-fried asparagus tip, pancetta, and walnut side. Never mind that these sides weren’t prominently featured on the menu – she knew what she wanted and any decent kitchen should meet your requests. And don’t listen to any protests from the waitstaff that they only serve the items listed on the menu; you order what makes most sense for you and demand that the restaurant accommodate you; that’s what they’re there for after all – it’s their whole reason for being in business. If met with further resistance, just raise your voice a bit. A bottle of a bold red (regardless of your entrée) is appropriate with your main. As I said, I am from California, so am partial to a California Cabernet, but if there are interesting French Burgundies available, that’s always an option. (BTW, don’t feel the need to finish absolutely every bottle – it’s just nice to have the bottle available so you don’t ever have to wait on a refill).
Dessert is really your playground. Whatever suits your fancy. I like to see a date pair something like a chocolate souffle and a cheese plate with a 375ml bottle of a nice tawny port. One date asked for small portions of everything on the dessert menu so she could taste and try a bit of everything – I was impressed!
As dessert winds down, confirm that they offer espresso, and ask where they source their coffee. If not up to your standards, dismiss the waitstaff with a sad shake of the head and a sigh and make clear that you’ll go elsewhere for proper coffee and after-dinner drink.
Hopefully by this point your date has presented himself as something more than a horrible dullard. If not, oh well – we all must live and learn from our trials. If he does show any bit of promise, I am confident that you will have made an impression! He may even wonder how he managed to get a date with such a worldly and more importantly *classy* woman. Good luck!
A domestic blanc de blanc is fantastic. Or, a French one from just outside the Champagne region.
Foie gras in the US is almost always going to be duck. And it's still fan-*kitten*-tastic.
Don't *kitten* with the menu like that unless you have a food allergy. The executive chef in a high-end restaurant puts a lot of work into making sure the flavors complement each other and create a mouth orgasm.
Asking from where the coffee is sourced is obnoxious. Worry about that at home. Or go somewhere that you know has single-origin South American or Jamaican coffee.
Now, I'm hungry! And it will be a while before I go out to a Michelin 3-star restaurant. :-(
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People....I'm pretty sure Cortelli was being sarcastic!!! Gheeze.....how is that not obvious?0
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spaghetti, chicken wings and caesar salad are hard ones because hard to eat without making a mess and often salads aren't in bite size pieces and one looks silly cutting a huge romance leaf with a knife and fork 0
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If the person I was on a date with decided he didn't like me anymore because of the food I ordered, I would consider it his loss and not mine.0
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capnrus789 wrote: »If everything goes according to plan, she'll be gobbling my knob be the end of the night.
Well aren't you precious.
So then the woman should get something with habanero or ghost pepper so as to inflict maximal pain on said knob without seeming to be doing it on purpose. XD muwahahahah0 -
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Ok so my date last night she had chicken tenders and fries. I have a banging burger. No dessert for either of us.0
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kshama2001 wrote: »rjmudlax13 wrote: »Whitezombiegirl wrote: »I have a few PERSONAL guidelines:
1. Don't eat anything stinky- personally I can't stand fish/ seafood or to be around anyone eating fish, baked beans, scramled eggs or blue cheese. Bleugh, but I would mention it beforehand.
2. Good table manners are a must. Must use a knife and fork properly and not talk with mouth full. No elbows on the table etc.
3. Have some knowledge and appreciation of wine. It's a turn off for me when a man doesn't know anything about wine. No sweet wine - unless with desert.
4. Don't pig out. Guys who stuff themselves on a date are a turn off for me- especially if they are so full afterwards that they get gas and can't move etc. Personally I like to eat light on a date so I'm not too full for 'afterwards'.
5. Don't 'feed' me. This grosses me out. Plus, taking food off my plate to try it- huge turn off.
6. Don't get drunk and sloppy.
7. Lastly- I'm being picky but I don't like it when a guy orders 'dainty' and 'sterotypically feminine' things- yes, it's just my perception. For example- ordering half a pint of larger or a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows etc. It's just my taste but I like a 'real ale and bloody steak' kind of guy.
Oh, and I'm okay with splitting the cheque. You might think some of these things are common sense (table-manners etc.) but I've encountered them on dates in the past. I'm sure loads of people on here have some good horror stories- I'd love to hear them!
Of course, once I'm in a relationship (I'm married)- most of those 'guidelines' go out of the window.
WOW. Glad I never went on a date with a person like you. Number 7 is especially sexist. Imagine if a man said the same thing about a women. Just wow.
She didn't say "men who order 'dainty' and 'sterotypically feminine' things are bad" - she said they are not to her taste.
1. We're allowed to have preferences.
2. Dating is all about evaluating for compatibility and screening out those who aren't.
When I was dating, I put current pictures on my profile. I wouldn't be the least bit offended if men gave me a pass because they preferred slimmer women. They get to have their preferences, as does Whitezombiegirl.
Right. If a woman has specific preferences she is being an independent and strong woman. If a man has preferences he is being a misogynist shallow sexist pig.0 -
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Did the OP ever reply to this thread?0
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yopeeps025 wrote: »ExRelaySprinter wrote: »Did the OP ever reply to this thread?
No
Still banking on someone coming in here to tell OP exactly what she wants to hear, with a response from OP saying "FINALLY, some real advice! This makes so much sense, thanks for not being rude like everyone else!!"0 -
10 pages in and no report on how the date went yet
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