Anyone else experience negativity due to weight loss?
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People are funny like that, unfortunately. If you're not successful it justifies their own lack of success and makes them feel better about their failures. Seeing your success is just a reminder of their own weight loss fails. I say this as a former hater myself. I used to feel like a failure and really inadequate around my fit and active friends. However, I always tried to never shame them for their lifestyle -it's not my style. But the jealousy was always there. It wasn't until I finally got tired of being depressed and unhappy that I finally did something about it and started moving. I had lost 30 pounds so far and am still working towards my goal of loosing another 30. Just remember that they're the ones that are unhappy and with the issues. Be proud of what you have done and keep doing what you're doing and stay healthy. Surround yourself with positive, like minded people that know how hard you've worked and won't try to sabotage your hard work. Right now I'm having that struggle with mother. I am very close to her. Before, she was constantly encouraging me to go on a diet. Now she keeps trying to feed me food that she knows I can't eat. She used to be thinner than me and now it's not the case. She guilted me into eating her food and I gained 10 pounds! She has made some comments about looking just fine as I am and that it was unattractive to be too skinny.But i dont blame her and I take full responsibility for not staying strong. She's obviously going through something and when I can be a little less testy, I will tell her how I feel. Meanwhile, I'm back to staying away from her cooking, upping my will power and not letting her get under my skin.0
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"Obsessed is a word the lazy use to describe the dedicated."
So I found that little gem of a quote this morning and had to share it with you all0 -
kygirl8282 wrote: »"Obsessed is a word the lazy use to describe the dedicated."
So I found that little gem of a quote this morning and had to share it with you all
I'll do you one better:
"Have you ever seen a hater that's doing better than you? Me neither."0 -
kygirl8282 wrote: »"Obsessed is a word the lazy use to describe the dedicated."
So I found that little gem of a quote this morning and had to share it with you all
I'll do you one better:
"Have you ever seen a hater that's doing better than you? Me neither."
Wonderful!0 -
You know what is funny? Twice now, women have hinted that now that I am "hotter", that might be tempted to stray. My weight has been part of our dynamic, as my hubby is positively attracted to voluptuous women. It's obvious now that people have wondered what I saw in him. Goodness gracious.
I have asked him if he would still be attracted to me, and he's answered non-committedly (he's a pro at this marriage stuff). And we still make a great team. Each other's best buddy.
You just gotta laugh.0 -
I have seen and heard a lot of mean spirited and hurtful comments, which I think stem from jealousy. Someone had success, so it's better to criticize them and their method rather than look inward as to why they themselves lack the dedication or commitment.
But I wonder if some of the negativity might stem from someone who has lost weight, and wants to talk about it all the time, in detail. I'm hate to use the word, because it's annoying to be accused of being 'obsessed' with health, diet, and exercise, when all you have done is your own thing, kept to yourself and shared only with people who have asked.
But there are those who maybe the term 'obsessed' does apply. Those who look at your lunch and tell you how many carbs you're consuming. When you did NOT ask. Or those who simply can't just turn down a piece of cake, or some kind of treat. Can't just say 'no thank you'. Instead we have to hear why they can't eat it. And that takes away a little bit from those who do want to enjoy it.
As we all know, everyone's approach is going to be different. And we live and work with people who don't need to worry about their diet, or just don't want to. And that is their business. Just as is it our business to eat what we want, when we want. And whether or not to exercise, and how we exercise.
Yes, I work with a lady who is doing this low carb thing, and that's fine for her, but it is not my thing at all. I do not want her advice, or hear about any of it. So I might be a little snarky about her weight loss. Sorry, but she kind of brought it on herself. I can't be 100 % ' rah rah good for you', when she announces yet again how much weight she's lost.0 -
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karintalley wrote: »I hate the "you are obsessed" comment. It's so annoying.
My mother used to say that to me in a really snide tone when I used to take 5 minutes to log my food. Then launch into how to do it "properly" and how to better lose weight..... The sort of advice you need from a mother trying to tell you the benefits of the cabbage soup diet ... who is also obese.
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I lost a lot of weight during this past spring semester by making healthier choices in the dining hall (all of the healthy options are already prepared for you ) and making regular, scheduled exercise a priority for the first time in my life. I'm home from college for the summer now, and my younger sister hates it that I make sure our fridge is stocked with fruits, veggies, yogurt, chicken, etc. instead of the crap I used to eat! She says that I've lost too much weight and am anorexic, which is not true at all. I'm 5'6, 148 lbs, and I eat all the time, just not junk. We are very close and I know she is only joking, but her words are can be hurtful and insensitive. And I know she's only lashing out because she feels like I am infringing on her lifestyle by not buying the food she wants at the grocery store, getting lighter options when we eat out, and the like. But I agree with the previous posters: to do this, you have to realize your self worth, and you have to be a little selfish.0
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I'm glad I'm not the only one who has discovered this side of success. I started in January and had a coworker stat the same time. Initially we would randomly compare notes, her how their no carb, no sugar, all clean weeks were going me recommending MFP. By March I noticed she wasn't chatting much, and I've not really been one to bring it up. Now it's like she straight up avoids me and the only commented I've heard is "aren't you done yet"?. I don't feel any loss, we were not really close to start with. Yet a few times I've wanted to comment that she is looking good, and things must be working, but she usually brushes past looking away. I don't know how much she's dropped, my guess is similar to me, but I've always been a small frame so I guess they feel I have lost more.0
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