Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

pofoster21 wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

crosbylee wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

peleroja wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

BZAH10 wrote: »

Tubbs216 wrote: »

riderfangal wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

quiksylver296 wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

pofoster21 wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

quiksylver296 wrote: »

Susieq_1994 wrote: »

KAjourneyof15 wrote: »

My confession is I have stretch marks literally ALL over my body. I have them on my boobs, stomach, thighs, and all over my back. Never pregnant, just formerly morbidly obese. I know stretch marks are normal but when they cover the majority of your body, it's a little overwhelming to accept that. I never took care of myself/my body as a teenager and unfortunately I can't do anything about the damage that has been done. What a great wish it would be to be able to go back in time and have a second chance with your body. I wish I knew then what I know now...but what can ya do? I am only 22 and I feel as if my body is just ruined. I don't feel comfortable in my own skin, it's honestly a very sad situation. You only get one body, and I messed mine up, there's no turning back really. As you can tell I have a lot of regrets. I also deal with loose skin but that's a whole other story on it's own. Hopefully at some point in my life I will feel better about my body and learn to accept it as who I am, but that hasn't happened yet.

Unfortunately, this is me as well. I do have some hope that the stretch marks will fade away and the skin will tighten up, because I'm only twenty. Twenty two isn't much older, so why give up hope?

SusieQ, I had no idea you were only 20!!! (Sorry if the 'only' sounds condescending, not intended. I am literally twice your age ) Have you been married very long?

I guess she was from the 1994 in her handle...are you turning the big 2-1 this year?!

That I am, in October. Although it's not really a big thing for me, since 21 is usually only a big date because people are legal drinkers then. Although I DO become eligible to apply for a free government-issued piece of land, the right of every Omani citizen, when I turn 21.

I assumed it was your birthdate as well but never thought much about how old that made you. How long have you been married? And is it normal for a Muslim woman to be married that young? And to something you said a long time ago (before I got so behind) you are very mature for your age.

Not necessarily Muslim women, but Arab women, yes. Early marriage is encouraged in Islam, since extramarital relationships are forbidden and it's pretty hard for most people to remain celibate for so many years after puberty. But the average age of marriage is different in each culture, and not necessarily dictated by religion.

A sad fact: The age of marriage is getting higher in the Arab world only because most young men can no longer afford to get married. Fathers are demanding crazy-high dowries (a girl is eligible for a dowry in Islam, and she is the one who's supposed to pick it and the money/gift is supposed to be hers alone, but some selfish families demand high dowries and then the father keeps it, saying that it's his payback for all the years of taking care of his daughter. Yes, seriously. -_-), along with demands of gold jewellery, a huge wedding, a new wardrobe... And all of it is supposed to come out of the young man's pockets. This is very contrary to Islam's teachings and makes me quite angry; most men have to take a loan just to get married!

My father demanded a 6000 ($16000) Omani rial dowry (meant to be mine, he wouldn't touch the money), because he didn't want to look bad by "giving his daughter away cheaply" <--- Another stupid cultural thing. But since Islamically the dowry is my choice... I took the 6000 for the sake of appearance to appease my dad, then secretly returned every penny of it to my husband after the wedding was over. I also had a super tiny wedding and insisted on paying for it myself, with any money I had left from my years of working (I had to stop due to my FND, but I've worked since I was 15). I also refused new clothing/jewellery/etc. I find it so stupid and wasteful.

I've been married for 1.5 years, as you'll see as you get further back into the thread.

You're so good about sharing your culture. I just want to say thanks for that.

I'm just happy that people don't find me boring for always talking about both my culture and religion! You're very welcome.

I love hearing about your culture!!

Me too! Don't stop talking about it!

Same here! I have learned SO much from @Susieq_1994! Now I'm waiting for some of these topics to come up in conversations in real life and I can be all smug about my new-found knowledge! Then if anyone asks me how I know I can be all vague and mysterious and say "I know someone online. It's a secret, though."

lol! It actually makes me really sad to see that some people who actually live among Muslims know nothing about them, just because everyone is afraid to offend by asking questions! :-/ So I spread my information far and wide!

As an example, I know a young Muslim girl living in the U.S. who plays softball, and one day she was performing her prayer in a corner of the field and her coach was all confused and kept asking if she was okay. She's been playing softball for years, but nobody on her team knows that Muslims pray?

Not that I think they're bigots or anything! I just think that the fear of offending people has reached a point where it's ridiculous--everyone wants to be so politically correct and not offend anyone or ask any questions that we're actually getting more and more ignorant about each other, which is only going to cause MORE problems down the road because nobody understands anyone else!

As you can see, since I'm always harping on about it... This topic is pretty close to my heart. My form of dawah (literally means invitation; it means teaching others about Islam) is to spread information about how we (Muslims) live so others won't fear us or feel afraid to ask us things in case they offend us.

You're awesome. I like to think (optimistically) that in my area (which has a lot of new Canadians and also quite a large Islamic Academy private school) we're pretty accepting and knowledgeable about the larger minority groups in our city, but I know it isn't always the case and, speaking for myself, I don't know anyone who grew up in the Middle East (apart from some friends who grew up in expat compounds), so I find your life especially interesting. All my Muslim acquaintances are at least second-generation Canadians so I've never heard much about day-to-day life somewhere like Saudi Arabia or Oman.

Aww, thank you! I hope you're right, but I do doubt that everyone in a particular area is accepting and knowledgeable about Muslims. But I guess finding someone who is from/lives in the Middle East can be a new experience!

I once saw a guy in an online chatroom talking about how he worked in Saudi Arabia and how everyone owned a camel and used them to get to work and school, and everyone lived in tents. I thought it was ridiculously stupid of him to do that--it just promotes making Arabs look like a bunch of backwards weirdos. I don't think he had actually visited the Middle East in his life. -_-

Sounds like something akin to every person from Texas owning a horse and having an oil well in their back yard. I live there and know it isn't true, just the stereotype that gets put out there.

Ahh, the oil well. We have that stereotype too, being from the Gulf. Some people in a chat room used to refer to me and my sister as oil princesses. And then they were shocked when they found out that everyone in the Gulf is not, in fact, a millionaire. O.o

Thanks to Jersey Shore everyone thinks people from New Jersey are classless humans with bad accents. And those people weren't even from New Jersey!

FroggyBug wrote: »

Just_Ceci wrote: »

I haven't said much, but I've been keeping up. By keeping up, I mean I read every post, even if it's days later. I went away for lunch earlier and came back to this:


I also noticed that we should hit 30,000 replies by tomorrow probably!


I think the one thing that keeps me coming back is all the love I feel here. It has been especially obvious today!

Glad I'm not alone. I always feel like I'm WAY behind and commenting on things too late but I just want to make sure I'm reading everything.

Lois_1989 wrote: »

kellienw335 wrote: »

Lois_1989 wrote: »

I just had the BEST NSV so far! Doing my lunch time weight training and I was sharing the squat rack with a personal trainer. So far I can squat 50Kg and he asked me if I'm going any higher to which I replied "No, I thought I would stay at 50Kg and check my form is ok and I'm comfortable before I go higher." To which he said "Pffft your form is better than most men in this gym!" I was like Really?! Made my day!

I just had to share it with you all, because that has actually made the lack of movement on the scales completely worth it.

Yay! That is awesome to hear! And glad you're back! I missed you in a non-stalky kind of way!

ETA: Was this one of the trainers that you thought was talking about you?

As a matter of fact it was! I had forgotten about that.
I remember saying to my mum, it was like they had a group meeting and decided I was nice enough because in the same week they all started being more talkative. I was a little bit weird.

LBuehrle8 wrote: »

kellienw335 wrote: »

CountessKitteh wrote: »

Confession: I'm not shutting up on here this morning because I'm trying to ignore how nervous I am about my interview(s) today.

I'm actually skipping lunch because of said nerves (and the timing), so I'm making buffalo chicken pizza for dinner! The "extra" calories (plus whatever I earn at the gym later) will make it guilt free.

Good luck on your interview today! I'm sure you will be super great!

Yes good luck @countesskitteh you'll do great!

xLoveLikeWinterx wrote: »

So my confession for today- I totally was looking at someone’s food diary and ordered P28 Almond butter off Amazon. Guilty spree purchase but I regret nothing! Lol it should come Tuesday and I’m looking forward to it. I sorta “journal stalk” in a non-creepy way to see how people who are successful on MFP do it. It helps me with my own plan.

I’m also slowing down loss, so I’m getting irritated. I’m having a “screw this” kind of day. I’m getting tired of weighing and logging my food, counting calories, etc. It kinda bums me out, because I’m still 16.6 lb from goal, so I need to do this for quite a bit longer *sigh*And I’m stuck at 2.2 lb over a “healthy BMI”. *grrrr*
But on the plus side, I ordered myself a book off Amazon to get myself out of the slight funk I’m in now. IDK when I’ll actually have time to read it, but hey… Reading is my escape. Prior to kids, if I had $, I bought books, then food. I’m actually super excited for the book to come in on Tuesday.
I did apply for the MS program and now I’m waiting to hear back. If I can get in and sneak in a class starting July 1st, I fall under an old tuition agreement, which will save me approximately $1k in fees/tuition. I’m hoping to hear back by mid next week and then get a spot in one of the classes that isn’t full. It’ll be tight, but I’m planning on renting the textbook. Of course it’s all a moot point if I don’t get in to the program, but fingers crossed I should. Once I finish, I’ll have a BA, BS, MA, MS, MBA, and still make less than my husband *snort* (he’s a software engineer). I’m awesome like that.

orangesmartie wrote: »

MoHousdon wrote: »

orangesmartie wrote: »

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Francl27 wrote: »

orangesmartie wrote: »

It never rains but it pours!


Got home today, checked on mum all gone well, just wait for further biopsy results to make they got it all.

My dad said my sister's social worker rang yesterday. Some of you may remember I mentioned previously my parents and I have custody of her 2 year old son and she is pregnant again. Anyway, it seems that the picture is bleak for the unborn child ( a little girl) and the social are minded to take this one into care when she's born, and they wanted to know if we'd have her.

Of course the answer is yes. But I can't tell you how tired and stressed that makes me feel already. My mum and I run our own company together, but she will have to give up work to care for baby, so the earning to keep us falls on me and my dad only. Not to mention the burden of caring for a baby and a toddler. I can't leave my parents to do it all on their own, but I feel exhausted just thinking about a baby.

I.never wanted children.

And my nanna blabbed to my mum something I said at the weekend (when drunk) about finding driving home every weekend and having Charlie tiring. Which is true, doesn't mean I don't want to do it.

But now my mum is horribly upset. And it's the last thing she needs.

So tonight, everything will be eaten. And I am enjoying one night in lazy solitude. No boyfriend, no girlfriend, no child, no expectations, just me, my sofa, my TV and some ice cream

That is so rough. I'm sorry. But it's not your responsibility... will you just keep taking the kids if she keeps getting pregnant? I mean, I can't even imagine how hard it must be, but you shouldn't have to ruin your life (same for your mother) because your sister is irresponsible.

This child needs to be where she'll be wanted. And I'm not judging you because I completely get it. If I had to take care of another child now I'd be devastated, and I did want children. But it's not the best for you, and it's probably not the best for her... Wishing you the best though.

No we won't keep taking kids, because I will make it a condition that the social apply to the court for a forcible sterilisation order so there are no more. We can't afford more (apologies if that offends people, I don't want to open the birth control debate).


I appreciate the honesty of your thoughts, and I don't take it as judgement. I understand what you say about the child being wanted. And she will be. She will be as loved and adored as Charlie is now, the children do not make these choices. I do. And they will get the best of everything I can give them, including me. Those children will never know the resentment I feel towards their mother.

My partners have already been on the phone planning how we make this work.

I might be crying now.

Sorry

In on-topic news, i have eaten a tub (480ml) of daim ice cream. Its awesome! and I am not beating myself up about it.

I may or may not eat popcorn also. Or i might just go to bed. But a 9ft bed on my own is empty yay diagonal sleeping!

Tubbs216 wrote: »

Ok, so my boy came home from his exam - cool as a cucumber and quite relaxed, said it went ok and was pretty cheerful about everything. All is well. Either he'll pass or he won't, but life will continue. Thanks for talking me down.