Fat goggles

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JustChristy79
JustChristy79 Posts: 156 Member
First, I was out with my husband tonight and some woman walked by & I mentioned that I'd like to get down to about her size. He laughed & said, "You are about her size. Probably even smaller." What?! In my mind, I'd look huuuuge standing next to her!

Then I came home & tried on all the new workout clothes I bought today. Everything is way too big! I'm starting to think my self image is a little off.

Wouldn't be the first time. When I was obese, I didn't think I looked that bad. Then I'd see a picture & be shocked that I was that big.

What the hell do I really look like?! Anyone else have these issues???
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Replies

  • Eri0515
    Eri0515 Posts: 85 Member
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    I think part of the problem is that we see ourselves in the mirror everyday so we don't see the changes we've made. As if, you could see the old you next to you in the mirror then you would see the big difference. Another part is that if you have been big for a long time your mind has come to accept that as reality. It does take quite awhile to accept the new reality. You'll get there. You have achieved the physical, now onto the mental.
    Congrats on your weight loss!
  • rachelecosse
    rachelecosse Posts: 19 Member
    edited July 2015
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    When I was ~19, I weighed around 10st (about right for my height) I used to look at my thighs and my stomach and my muffintop and quietly hate every inch of myself because I was so fat. So seven years later, when I weighed 18st, I didn't see much difference.

    A little while back, I went to h&m very tentatively, knowing I'd lost weight and maybe some of their clothes would fit me now. I picked up a cute sweater in XL, took it to the changing room and... It was too big. So I went and got a Large, pleased as punch, tried it on and... Too big. I bought the medium in both colours out of sheer joy that it fit me. Two months later... Too big! (Though, I think h&m is being at least a LITTLE cavalier with their sizing, as I'm still a solid size 14, which isn't a 'size small' in most people's book.)

    Yesterday, as I was walking past the big shiny plate glass wall to get into the gym, I noticed that my favourite cardigan was fitting weird. It was hanging down over my butt, and I couldn't get the sleeves to stay pushed up over my elbows. It honestly looked awful, like I was wearing my mums clothes, and I was totally shocked by how much too big it looked.

    So no, you're not alone! I'm still struggling to reconcile the picture of myself in my head with the outside body.
  • craigheon
    craigheon Posts: 167 Member
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    Are you taking pictures during your transformation? If not, it's very helpful to do so. Once a month, and then compare... then you'll see the differences!
  • laurie62ann
    laurie62ann Posts: 433 Member
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    Phantom Fat - check out this article. I've lost over 50 pounds and most days when I look in the mirror I still see the "old fat" me.

    http://www.nbcnews.com/id/31489881/ns/health-womens_health/t/phantom-fat-can-linger-after-weight-loss/#.VajjTfmbr5w
  • Becca211H
    Becca211H Posts: 24 Member
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    Yes! I've always been a little bigger than a friend of mine and thought I still was. We recently bought the same shirt in the same size and it was tight on her but fit me fine. It was a weird realization.
  • Drewlssix
    Drewlssix Posts: 272 Member
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    When I was ~19, I weighed around 10st (about right for my height) I used to look at my thighs and my stomach and my muffintop and quietly hate every inch of myself because I was so fat. So seven years later, when I weighed 18st, I didn't see much difference.

    A little while back, I went to h&m very tentatively, knowing I'd lost weight and maybe some of their clothes would fit me now. I picked up a cute sweater in XL, took it to the changing room and... It was too big. So I went and got a Large, pleased as punch, tried it on and... Too big. I bought the medium in both colours out of sheer joy that it fit me. Two months later... Too big! (Though, I think h&m is being at least a LITTLE cavalier with their sizing, as I'm still a solid size 14, which isn't a 'size small' in most people's book.)

    Yesterday, as I was walking past the big shiny plate glass wall to get into the gym, I noticed that my favourite cardigan was fitting weird. It was hanging down over my butt, and I couldn't get the sleeves to stay pushed up over my elbows. It honestly looked awful, like I was wearing my mums clothes, and I was totally shocked by how much too big it looked.

    So no, you're not alone! I'm still struggling to reconcile the picture of myself in my head with the outside body.

    Been there, went from 40-42 waist to 38 and decided to go ahead and buy some size 36 for down the road. It turns out that "down the road" was just a few weeks later. Now even my almost new size 36 pants will fall off without a belt! And anything larger is unwearable.
  • jessiruthica
    jessiruthica Posts: 412 Member
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    First, I was out with my husband tonight and some woman walked by & I mentioned that I'd like to get down to about her size. He laughed & said, "You are about her size. Probably even smaller." What?! In my mind, I'd look huuuuge standing next to her!

    Then I came home & tried on all the new workout clothes I bought today. Everything is way too big! I'm starting to think my self image is a little off.

    Wouldn't be the first time. When I was obese, I didn't think I looked that bad. Then I'd see a picture & be shocked that I was that big.

    What the hell do I really look like?! Anyone else have these issues???

    Me, exactly! I cosign everything you said. Now how do we get those goggles off?
  • vdeepu17
    vdeepu17 Posts: 30 Member
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    When I was ~19, I weighed around 10st (about right for my height) I used to look at my thighs and my stomach and my muffintop and quietly hate every inch of myself because I was so fat. So seven years later, when I weighed 18st, I didn't see much difference.

    A little while back, I went to h&m very tentatively, knowing I'd lost weight and maybe some of their clothes would fit me now. I picked up a cute sweater in XL, took it to the changing room and... It was too big. So I went and got a Large, pleased as punch, tried it on and... Too big. I bought the medium in both colours out of sheer joy that it fit me. Two months later... Too big! (Though, I think h&m is being at least a LITTLE cavalier with their sizing, as I'm still a solid size 14, which isn't a 'size small' in most people's book.)

    Yesterday, as I was walking past the big shiny plate glass wall to get into the gym, I noticed that my favourite cardigan was fitting weird. It was hanging down over my butt, and I couldn't get the sleeves to stay pushed up over my elbows. It honestly looked awful, like I was wearing my mums clothes, and I was totally shocked by how much too big it looked.

    So no, you're not alone! I'm still struggling to reconcile the picture of myself in my head with the outside body.

    You made be laugh girl. Keep up the good work
  • amy102875
    amy102875 Posts: 38 Member
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    Yes, I still see myself as heavy. I try to keep looking at myself in the mirror every morning for a few minutes to help my brain catch up with the fact that I'm not heavy anymore, lol. Taking pictures helps too.
  • lthaus
    lthaus Posts: 26 Member
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    I'm just a guy, but.... at my worst I was 265+.. i'm sitting just over 200 now and if it were not for the clothes falling off, I would not "see" much change at all. I truly Envy you brave folks to get the shots in front of the mirror at your time of decision... cause its much easier to compare two photographs than that picture in the minds eye.
  • marshmallowsandsnark
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    This is the story of my life! When I was 11, my aunt, who was obese, called me "thunder thighs" when I jumped into a pool. That was the defining moment for me. I figured she knew what she was talking about -takes one to know one. I had always been taller and bigger-framed than most girls my age, so it kind of dawned on me that "OH! I'm FAT! Now I get it!"

    Fast forward to 15/16 YO, still bigger than a lot of my friends, but really only a size 10/12 at 6' tall. Looking back on that, I realize I had a body that most girls would envy.

    I met a guy who loved to eat (and ate poorly) and we spent 11 years together and I got heavier and heavier, but looked in the mirror and saw my "old" body, which wasn't reflected in the size of my clothes or the discomfort I felt, but somehow I just didn't see it. He didn't complain and somehow I forgot how to really see myself through my own eyes.

    Now I'm over 360 lbs and every time I look in the mirror I think I look smaller than I actually am - and when I look at pictures, I'm MORTIFIED at how big I actually am.

    In my minds eye, I've ALWAYS been this big.

    It's two things - one, like, the actual visual plane used to see yourself in the mirror affects how you judge your body size. (A photographer explained it to me once, it's literally about visual perspective. Think about how great your selfies are and how horrid the pictures your friends take can be.) And two, yes, the fat goggles, because our brains are good at confusing us.

    I judge how I look in pictures because I think it's more accurate.

    And I will never stop thinking the line, "I wish I was as fat as I was the first time I thought I was fat."
  • yusaku02
    yusaku02 Posts: 3,476 Member
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    I have that issue but in reverse. I'm stuck feeling forever small. I'm fairly certain I'm still scrawny as heck but even if I got to the size of The Rock I'd feel like the 148 pound stick I was in high school.
  • orchidbutterflies
    orchidbutterflies Posts: 59 Member
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    I have a couple of pictures of me at my heaviest from the extremely rare moments I allowed myself to be in a camera's frame. I'm almost 100lbs down from there but I can't see the change. I'm down a size and all my clothing is pretty much too big but I still have so much more to go that when I look at myself that is really all I can see.

    Instead I try to notice the weight loss in ways that aren't so directly visual... How chairs with arms don't cut into my thighs quite so much, my shadow is surprisingly slimmer etc
    Next week I'm going out to dinner and I can't wait to see how I fit in the booth. I know that before my stomach would practically be cut in half by the table and it wasn't easy getting out!
  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
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    I grew up as an overweight kid up until my late teens/early 20's. To this day I still overestimate my size, how much space I take up, etc.
  • mareacuda
    mareacuda Posts: 26 Member
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    lilleyn1 wrote: »
    This is the story of my life! When I was 11, my aunt, who was obese, called me "thunder thighs" when I jumped into a pool. That was the defining moment for me. I figured she knew what she was talking about -takes one to know one. I had always been taller and bigger-framed than most girls my age, so it kind of dawned on me that "OH! I'm FAT! Now I get it!"

    Fast forward to 15/16 YO, still bigger than a lot of my friends, but really only a size 10/12 at 6' tall. Looking back on that, I realize I had a body that most girls would envy.

    I met a guy who loved to eat (and ate poorly) and we spent 11 years together and I got heavier and heavier, but looked in the mirror and saw my "old" body, which wasn't reflected in the size of my clothes or the discomfort I felt, but somehow I just didn't see it. He didn't complain and somehow I forgot how to really see myself through my own eyes.

    Now I'm over 360 lbs and every time I look in the mirror I think I look smaller than I actually am - and when I look at pictures, I'm MORTIFIED at how big I actually am.

    In my minds eye, I've ALWAYS been this big.

    It's two things - one, like, the actual visual plane used to see yourself in the mirror affects how you judge your body size. (A photographer explained it to me once, it's literally about visual perspective. Think about how great your selfies are and how horrid the pictures your friends take can be.) And two, yes, the fat goggles, because our brains are good at confusing us.

    I judge how I look in pictures because I think it's more accurate.

    And I will never stop thinking the line, "I wish I was as fat as I was the first time I thought I was fat."

    I feel you so much! I am 6' tall and have always been big... a size 18 since I was maybe 11? The lowest weight I ever remember seeing on a scale was 180 lbs when I was probably 11 or 12. I definitely feel like this is just how I look. I have had several relationships with bad eaters and ended up around a size 24 (330 lbs) years ago. I agree that photos are a huge eye opener. I am 260 lbs now (size 16) and aiming for my wedding weight of 225 by our anniversary in October. My ultimate goal is to see that 180 lbs on the scale again :smiley:

  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,576 Member
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    I had something similar happen once. I had acquaintance who I always thought I’d like to be as thin as. Then we both happened to be in a picture together and I saw that I was actually a bit smaller than she.

    But most of the time I think I look better in the mirror than I do in pictures. It's so bad that my husband tries to not let me see pictures of myself, which is actually fine with me.
  • aliciasilfies
    aliciasilfies Posts: 179 Member
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    I absolutely agree with this! I'm only a little shy of 28 lbs down, but I still catch myself worrying if I need a seatbelt extender on the airplane, if someone will be able to fit in the seat next to me on the subway, or even if my tights will fit!
  • cristical
    cristical Posts: 126 Member
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    I think you look small...lol I have the same issue!
  • happygalah
    happygalah Posts: 343 Member
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    Yeah it's odd and it takes time to catch up. Picking out clothing way too big and they just fall off and trying a small size and thinking umm a little kid can fit into that and not me and it ends up fitting me perfectly.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    I can go from, "Holy crap I'm tiny!" to "OMG I'm a wildabeest!" in the space of less than a day. I've done this for long enough now that when I swing to either pole, I know all I have to do is wait, that I won't feel that way forever. IDK if that helps, but it keeps me from freaking out so much.
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