Choosing Friends

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  • JenD1066
    JenD1066 Posts: 298 Member
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    I generally accept, then view their profile. If they're selling something, or if they have 10,042 friends, or if they only consume 150 calories a day, I delete them.
  • _incogNEATo_
    _incogNEATo_ Posts: 4,543 Member
    edited July 2015
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    Non_Stop wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Just remember when you accept FRs that this place also serves as part online dating site, so you may get random messages to flirt.

    But usually if you put "PLEASE DO NOT FLIRT I AM HAPPILY MARRIED" you'll weed out a lot of that mess.

    I've found that the ones who post that are the ones who have been caught up pretty heavily in the flirting in the past :)
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
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    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Just remember when you accept FRs that this place also serves as part online dating site, so you may get random messages to flirt.

    I might be doing this site wrong :frowning:

    OP, I look at a few things. When considering who to add, I look at people who are helpful and active here. Similar goals are nice, along with similar ideas of how to get there, but are not necessary. I like having a nice mix of helpful and supportive with a great amount of sarcasm and wit. My friends here amuse me and support me greatly. They have kept me coming back at times when I was ready to give up.
  • michellemybelll
    michellemybelll Posts: 2,228 Member
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    you'll get better quality friends if you fill out your profile and tell a little more about yourself too.
  • _incogNEATo_
    _incogNEATo_ Posts: 4,543 Member
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    Non_Stop wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Non_Stop wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Just remember when you accept FRs that this place also serves as part online dating site, so you may get random messages to flirt.

    But usually if you put "PLEASE DO NOT FLIRT I AM HAPPILY MARRIED" you'll weed out a lot of that mess.

    I've found that the ones who post that are the ones who have been caught up pretty heavily in the flirting in the past :)

    Speaking of flirting, what big black weights you have there. Do those rubber 45lb plates weigh more than the regular metal 45lb plates?

    No, they just bounce higher when I throw them on the ground. Thanks for noticing though.
  • goofyrick24
    goofyrick24 Posts: 125 Member
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    I just want friends so I Can be more motivated on here and with my diet and weight loss. I was on here with a lot of support 2 years ago now only one of those friends still posts on here. I am about 60 lbs overweight, out of shape, and tired of taking medicines and having surgeries (gall bladder, ulcer, etc) all do to my crappy habits... I would love as many friends as possible.. I'm not on here to be a perv. (I'm happily married).. I just need help and support..
  • _incogNEATo_
    _incogNEATo_ Posts: 4,543 Member
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    Non_Stop wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Non_Stop wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Non_Stop wrote: »
    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Just remember when you accept FRs that this place also serves as part online dating site, so you may get random messages to flirt.

    But usually if you put "PLEASE DO NOT FLIRT I AM HAPPILY MARRIED" you'll weed out a lot of that mess.

    I've found that the ones who post that are the ones who have been caught up pretty heavily in the flirting in the past :)

    Speaking of flirting, what big black weights you have there. Do those rubber 45lb plates weigh more than the regular metal 45lb plates?

    No, they just bounce higher when I throw them on the ground. Thanks for noticing though.

    OP, never trust a friend who bounces weights instead of lifting them.

    true story. I'm a terrible excuse for a friend.
  • Soggynode
    Soggynode Posts: 1,179 Member
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    Lots of good advice so far. In addition to much that has been mentioned, I will sometimes go to the Community tab and search their user name to see if they are active on the boards. If they are it's a good way to see what type of posts they leave. I've avoided a few kooks that way.

  • mattyc772014
    mattyc772014 Posts: 3,543 Member
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    Don't be a lone wolf, join the pack. We want you. :)
  • mattyc772014
    mattyc772014 Posts: 3,543 Member
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    @Non_Stop That's a fury dog between my legs. Way to go off topic. :)
  • mattyc772014
    mattyc772014 Posts: 3,543 Member
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    Non_Stop wrote: »
    mattyc772014 wrote: »
    @Non_Stop That's a fury dog between my legs. Way to go off topic. :)

    Oh wow, completely missed that. My imagination got carried away.

    Its ok if you have those thoughts. I dont judge.
  • mattyc772014
    mattyc772014 Posts: 3,543 Member
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    We should get back to the OP. Dont be afraid to make friends. Most don't bite.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
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    I look for people that have mutual friends, or we seem to connect here on the forums, or through other friends profiles. When people friend request me, I ask for a message because I want friends that are invested enough in me to at least read my profile first :)

    I don't want to collect friends, I want to make actual friends.
  • barbecuesauce
    barbecuesauce Posts: 1,779 Member
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    Non_Stop wrote: »
    Fitwarrior7_Round_2 wrote: »
    Dont accept friend requests without a message. Most people say why they want to add you...even put a line in your profile about it to ward off skeevers.

    Problem with this advice is that a lot of people on this site only use the app to access MFP, which means they can't read that they should include a message.

    Best advice is to accept, read through prior comments they've made on their profile and if you agree with their lifestyle, then keep them around.

    Agree.

    I didn't want friends when I first made this profile, deleted all requests. Now I've started accepting everyone and unless they are people I would avoid IRL, they stay. I'm not that interested in the friendship side of it though--one reason I deleted my last one was that there were some people who would. not. stop. messaging. me.

    OP, decide what you want out of your experience on here and choose from there. Do you want people who are like you and have similar goals? Do you want chatty people? Do you want people who are more experienced (you're probably going to have to do the asking there)?
  • teanahk
    teanahk Posts: 81 Member
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    I'll accept pretty much anybody.
    I'm quick to befriend them if they turn out to be wack-a-doodles.

    A general bit of advice, if they constantly mention their instagram account or ask you to join their "Facebook weight loss challenge group" run the other way because they are going to try and sell you some crappy smoothies/cleanses/miracle pills.
  • ImNancyLynn
    ImNancyLynn Posts: 36 Member
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    So far I have had excellent luck with the people I have asked to be friends and then some of their friends have friended me. I have a really terrific support group. I have not encountered any creepy people yet! If anyone gets weird I will simply delete them. Take a chance on adding some people, you might find some terrific support like I have! Good luck!
  • angel_minor18
    angel_minor18 Posts: 35 Member
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    _incogNEATo_ wrote: »
    Just remember when you accept FRs that this place also serves as part online dating site, so you may get random messages to flirt.

    I have noticed this already...lol...trying to avoid that.
  • angel_minor18
    angel_minor18 Posts: 35 Member
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    michellemybelll wrote: »
    you'll get better quality friends if you fill out your profile and tell a little more about yourself too.

    Good idea...didn't think about that.
  • angel_minor18
    angel_minor18 Posts: 35 Member
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    goofyrick24 wrote: »
    I just want friends so I Can be more motivated on here and with my diet and weight loss. I was on here with a lot of support 2 years ago now only one of those friends still posts on here. I am about 60 lbs overweight, out of shape, and tired of taking medicines and having surgeries (gall bladder, ulcer, etc) all do to my crappy habits... I would love as many friends as possible.. I'm not on here to be a perv. (I'm happily married).. I just need help and support..

    It sounds like you're here for all the right reasons. ..I wish you the best!
  • angel_minor18
    angel_minor18 Posts: 35 Member
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    Caitwn wrote: »
    What worked for me was getting brave enough to send friend requests to people I noticed here (and a couple I met on the reddit site /r/loseit) who had clearly been active posters for some time, and who consistently gave good advice and feedback. I included a brief note introducing myself and letting them know why I was reaching out to them in particular.

    So now I feel extremely fortunate in having a strong and supportive friends network here.

    When it comes to others contacting me, I'll typically accept and then delete them if they never communicate or if they get hung up in diet scams that they decide are The One True Way.

    Thank you for your positive and helpful feedback :)

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