Weight loss -awkward subject?
catt952
Posts: 190 Member
I've been on this diet for over a month and a half now, I realize that in another month or two my appearance will change because i would have lost weight. Thing is, my weight is a sensitive subject for me.. I don't want people blurting out about my weight loss or asking me what i have been doing to lose weight in front of everyone because then they expect me to talk about it. Does anyone else feel like this?
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Replies
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Stop calling it a diet.-1
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I know just what you mean. For me, if they acknowledge that I am losing weight they are also acknowledging that I am overweight. Or like people are watching you, and if you have a set back, it's embarrassing. Can you get away with saying "I've lost a little, thank you for asking." Then change the subject? Maybe have a couple of subjects in your mind just for the occasion? Or compliment them on something... most people love to talk about themselves.0
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skattersIA wrote: »I know just what you mean. For me, if they acknowledge that I am losing weight they are also acknowledging that I am overweight.
So why are you losing weight? If you noticed you need to don't you think everyone else did too?
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Just use short but courteous responses and repeat them verbatim to get the point across that you don't want to talk about it. If they ask if you've lost weight, just be like "Yep, I've lost weight," and if they ask what you're doing just say "I've made some changes." Couple these responses with "Is that a new perfume you're wearing?" or any kind of polite random question to change the topic of discussion.0
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People know im fat, i mean..they have seen me. I do look better. I know i do, and when someone mentions it, it means my hard work is paying off, and obvios to someone other than myself. It makes me full of pride, and that much more accountable. If they know i lost, then they willb obviously know i gained. I actually prefer my real life friends on my fitness pal for that very reason. Im not just a random stranger.0
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ncboiler89 wrote: »skattersIA wrote: »I know just what you mean. For me, if they acknowledge that I am losing weight they are also acknowledging that I am overweight.
So why are you losing weight? If you noticed you need to don't you think everyone else did too?
I am losing weight so *I* feel better. I am losing weight for a lot of reasons - but very few of them have to do with other people. Yes, I am sure they noticed I am fat. But I don't want to notice that they have noticed. /shrug
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Just accept they will notice.
You mention your losing weight for yourself, you don't care what others think/thought.
So why do you care they notice weightloss.
Someone asks you about it say "yeah thanks but I would rather not talk about"0 -
Or wear baggy clothes, a fat suit or similar to increase the time before people notice.0
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I was at party a couple months ago with a few people I have known a couple years but am not close to., and several people I was just meeting... My now ex-fella blurts out to these random people I had lost 30 pounds. I was soooo peeved!!, Embarassed! Upset! Yes, I allowed myself to get more than heavy, took care of it..... Most of them saw me a couple years ago before 15 extra pounds randomly showed up in addition to the15 I put on years ago after kids. So why for instance does someone else even rationally think it is okay to bring up my weight loss in front of people who don't even know me, or others who I know but never saw me overweight?? Sorry... Venting0
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Sandcastles61 wrote: »I was at party a couple months ago with a few people I have known a couple years but am not close to., and several people I was just meeting... My now ex-fella blurts out to these random people I had lost 30 pounds.
I can see this being a problem and dude probably needs punched in the face.0 -
ncboiler89 wrote: »Sandcastles61 wrote: »I was at party a couple months ago with a few people I have known a couple years but am not close to., and several people I was just meeting... My now ex-fella blurts out to these random people I had lost 30 pounds.
I can see this being a problem and dude probably needs punched in the face.
Hahaha... I have always enjoyed your salty advice
Just kicked him to the curb instead for being "insensitive" LOL 0 -
Recently I went to a party and ran into another couple I haven't seen in years. The first thing out of the guys mouth was "hey! You've lost a s--- ton of weight!" I don't care that he noticed but I didn't really care for the announcement. Made me feel super awkward.0
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People say these things because they are impressed and/or proud of u if they know u. Smile and say thank you, it's been quite a journey. Of course people noticed you were overweight before. Ususlly WE are the only ones who couldn't see how bad off we were. Yes, sometimes they don't express themselves well and end up sounding like an insult. Quite frankly, I now love making people's jaw drop!!0
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Recently I went to a party and ran into another couple I haven't seen in years. The first thing out of the guys mouth was "hey! You've lost a s--- ton of weight!" I don't care that he noticed but I didn't really care for the announcement. Made me feel super awkward.
Yep...,, same but different than my experience. Those dang public exclamations by random people???? No thanks!!0 -
I learned to enjoy the positive attention over time. Eventually it will be your new normal and nobody will notice anymore.
What I hate is people telling me to stop and trying to shove food down my throat. I've lost 50 lbs and look drastically different than I used to, but I'm still not in the normal weight range for my height. I have a lot of belly fat that still needs to go...about 25 more lbs worth to be exact. Yet some people are actively encouraging me to stop. That's what I find most frustrating.0 -
I take it as a compliment, plus its nice to know your efforts are paying off. I feel very flattered when people mention it, its when they bring it up over and over that I start feeling a bit uncomfortable. I've lost 30lbs and I feel exactly as fat as I did before so it feels good knowing its probably in my head0
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Many people never see successful weight loss. It's unusual, like seeing someone get hit by lightning.
They shouldn't comment, really, bc people lose weight bc of illness, sometimes. But (since you're not ill), recognize what a weird thing it is they're seeing, and take it as a compliment. Say "yes, I lost weight, thanks for noticing! I counted calories and walked" (or whatever) and it will take 30 seconds & then you can change the subject.0 -
Many people never see successful weight loss. It's unusual, like seeing someone get hit by lightning.
They shouldn't comment, really, bc people lose weight bc of illness, sometimes. But (since you're not ill), recognize what a weird thing it is they're seeing, and take it as a compliment. Say "yes, I lost weight, thanks for noticing! I counted calories and walked" (or whatever) and it will take 30 seconds & then you can change the subject.
Whew. And I was thinking I was drinking a lot tonight.0 -
I dunno, i don't have a lot of friends and i am quiet in my class so i shouldn't expect too much fuss over it. If someone kicks up a fuss i'll shoot them the death stare lol.0
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ncboiler89 wrote: »Many people never see successful weight loss. It's unusual, like seeing someone get hit by lightning.
They shouldn't comment, really, bc people lose weight bc of illness, sometimes. But (since you're not ill), recognize what a weird thing it is they're seeing, and take it as a compliment. Say "yes, I lost weight, thanks for noticing! I counted calories and walked" (or whatever) and it will take 30 seconds & then you can change the subject.
Whew. And I was thinking I was drinking a lot tonight.
lolI dunno, i don't have a lot of friends and i am quiet in my class so i shouldn't expect too much fuss over it. If someone kicks up a fuss i'll shoot them the death stare lol.
Aw... if you're quiet and have a hard time talking to people, it might be good practice, no? Not an ideal subject to practice on, I'm sure you'd rather talk about something else, but if you can get through conversations about this, I think that might help you feel more confident about handling other kinds of conversations.Ashtoretet wrote: »Just use short but courteous responses and repeat them verbatim to get the point across that you don't want to talk about it. If they ask if you've lost weight, just be like "Yep, I've lost weight," and if they ask what you're doing just say "I've made some changes." Couple these responses with "Is that a new perfume you're wearing?" or any kind of polite random question to change the topic of discussion.
^^ perfect advice0 -
I've been on this diet for over a month and a half now, I realize that in another month or two my appearance will change because i would have lost weight. Thing is, my weight is a sensitive subject for me.. I don't want people blurting out about my weight loss or asking me what i have been doing to lose weight in front of everyone because then they expect me to talk about it. Does anyone else feel like this?
I don't really look foward to conversing about my weight. I'm certainly not going to bring it up. If asked about my loss I would just say I watched my calorie intake and change the subject. I'm good at not talking about things I don't want to talk about about though.0 -
You can't really control what other people say/do. But you can control what YOU say/do. If you don't wanna talk about it, don't. I didn't tell anybody I was trying to lose weight, because I didn't want any commentary on what I was or was not eating. When people ask me if I lost weight, I just say yes, and if they ask me how, I just say, "Calorie counting." If people wanna ask more questions, I don't mind. But I tend not to volunteer info.0
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People think that's a good thing to say and I know they mean it as a compliment but it's ok to be bothered by it. Your body isn't actually their business and you don't have to talk about it to anyone. People make way too big a deal over what other people look like.0
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People think that's a good thing to say and I know they mean it as a compliment but it's ok to be bothered by it. Your body isn't actually their business and you don't have to talk about it to anyone. People make way too big a deal over what other people look like.
This is also very true0 -
Personally, I love people noticing that I've lost weight. I know damn well that I'm fat and need to lose weight, and it feels good to have someone notice how hard I've been working to get to where I am. Now saying that, I do hate when people ask me how I did it. I'm just like the normal way man.
Sometimes I'm tempted to get sarcastic and tell them that a magic spell made the fat just disappear. lol0 -
You are being too sensitive.
This is one of those things that you just have to figure out. In the grand scheme of things, it really is not a big challenge.
People notice other people's bodies. It's reality, whether you like it or not.
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When someone comments and says I've lost weight I just smile and say "thanks, just a little" and move the subject on to something else. I think it is a horrible topic and don't understand how people think it is an appropriate thing to bring up but they do. But then I see tons of posts on here where people are mad no one is talking about their weight so they are probably hanging around people like me who would never bring it up and I'm surrounded by people like them who only want to talk about it!
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Yes. Don't be ashamed to feel like this. Weight is VERY personal yet people will always feel the need to blurt out "wow have you lost weight" and assume its a massive compliment. I don't think there's a way to stop people opening their mouths and voicing their opinions on this (if only..) but perhaps work on how you deal with it. I'd suggest a "yes I have, thank you". And close the subject. If you aren't comfortable with discussing it then don't discuss it. Its totally your right.
Good luck 0 -
People say these things because they are impressed and/or proud of u if they know u. Smile and say thank you, it's been quite a journey. Of course people noticed you were overweight before. Ususlly WE are the only ones who couldn't see how bad off we were. Yes, sometimes they don't express themselves well and end up sounding like an insult. Quite frankly, I now love making people's jaw drop!!
I totally understand and appreciate that train of thought from a fella's perspective....... I also understand and appreciate the sentiment it's your body and you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. My personal exception came from someone close to me making a public proclamation in front of a group of individuals I either had never met before, or who had never seen me more than 15 pounds over my lowest weight after I had children nearly 30 years ago. Women can be a little funny that way. If one of them had said, hey way to go, you look fabulous since the last time I saw you... I absolutely would have smiled and thanked them0 -
Just say
"Yes I have, thank you for noticing, so how is....."0
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