I'm Embarrassed to Lose Weight

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  • NanBar
    NanBar Posts: 283 Member
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    That seems like an excuse to set yourself up for failure in case you dont meet your goal. Just look at what you have been done and be proud of it on the inside. You do not have to tell anyone anything...and I pretty much guarantee when you drop the other 40 pounds you will want to scream it from the rafters.
  • FruitLoop05317
    FruitLoop05317 Posts: 229
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    I need to know if I am the only one who feels like this.

    I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, but I am embarrassed to tell people how much I have lost or that I'm even losing weight. I am so ashamed of how heavy I let myself get and I don't really want people to know that I've lost 61 lbs but have another 50 lbs to lose. It's embarrassing.

    Does anyone else out there feel the same way I do?
    at first i was embarassed to tell people, but slowly but surely the more i lost the less embarassed i was and this site has helped. i have lost 54 and a half pounds, and have 118.8 left to lose. i still dont like to tell some people my starting weight, like my boyfriend, or my skinny friends...but all the people i really trust know. as long as you have someone you can tell or even someone on here, you shouldnt have to come out and say what you weighed if you dont want to. my starting weight by the way, was 323.6. you can feel free to add me if you like.
  • gec1266
    gec1266 Posts: 201 Member
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    Never be ashamed of where you are going. Your past is just that and it is behind you. Now is the time for you to pick yourself up and push through. You know where you want to get to and you have the entire MFP family behind you. We will help you through whatever you are feeling and if you look on here...you are not alone. There are people who were in your position,are in your position,and wish they could be in your position. We all have doubts but with a large family...we will all make it!!!
  • em1823
    em1823 Posts: 16 Member
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    I definitely understand. When I came to law school I weighed under 150 pounds and am not 25 pounds heavier and am completely embarrassed that I let myself go like that! All I want to do, at this point, is forget about the scale and worry about how my clothes fit and how I feel. When I look in the mirror, I want to feel amazing, not see the extra fat I have accumulated over the past two years.

    You have accomplished so much! Just remember that each and every day! Congratulations!
  • eeeekie
    eeeekie Posts: 1,011 Member
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    I think people would be more intrigued that you lost 100lbs than the fact that you gained 100lbs to begin with. A lot of people will admire you for taking control of your life. I'm only 30lbs into my weight loss and I have tons of people saying they admire me and telling me how inspiring I am and how proud of me they are. You need to stop thinking about what they might be thinking (because your thoughts on what you might think they are thinking) is A LOT worse than what they are really thinking.
  • raaynes
    raaynes Posts: 58
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    I totally understand this. It's as if acknowledging the weight you've lost is admitting that you had weight to loose... that's my perception, anyways. I fully accept I have a few pounds to lose, but am admittedly embarrassed to admit this to anyone else... an awkward sort of public denial.
  • chridow
    chridow Posts: 178
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    I can understand that feeling of embarrassment. The other suggestions to not talk numbers and give generic type responses are good ones. But I also beleive that part of the embarrassment is from the power the number on the scale has. Part of being able to get that power back is to talk about that number openly. Hopefully one day you'll be more comfortable. But remember that the number on the scale IS NOT who you are as a person! You were brave enough to see you needed to change something in your life and you're working hard to do it. Numbers don't convey that, YOU DO!

    I personally was very ashamed of my weight and NEVER spoke about it. But as I've finally started to lose weight I've become more open about it because I don't want some stupid number to control how I feel about myself. I need that power to reach my goal!

    I wish you much (continued) success in your weightloss :-D
  • MrsCB10
    MrsCB10 Posts: 17 Member
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    I feel embarrassed BEING at the gym. I feel so out of shape and out of place whenever I step foot in the gym. I'm sure no one is looking at me, but I'm so self concious it makes me feel all eyes are on the "new girl" (I feel "new" because I go MAYBE once a week - ugh). My husband wants me to go with him and I finally had to break down and explain to him that I feel stupid being there with him. He's so supportive and wonderful with me -- I wish I could go with him and be supportive of HIM without feeling soooo out of place.
  • sugarbeans
    sugarbeans Posts: 676 Member
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    Congrats on the weight loss so far and your strive to become healthier. Most people don't mean for the weight to come on it just happens, usually there is a stressor, tragedy, unhappieness or some other trigger where we tend to turn to food to "fix" it or escape it.
    Yes it can be embarrassing to have the excess weight but the important thing to remember is that you are becoming a healthier person and weight loss is just the benefit of that.

    Look at this as how good you feel. Look back at where you were 61 lbs heavier and where you are now and look at the accomplishments that have transpired. Try to look at the 61lbs as a success, most people have a hard time losing 10 lbs and remember this journey is about you and only you.

    Keep your chin up and again congrats to your success in figuring out a lifestyle that works for you.
  • rlelliott08
    rlelliott08 Posts: 29 Member
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    I totally feel the same way you do, I gave birth to my son back in 08' before I found out I was pregnant I weighed about 160. Which I wasn't happy with but I took it as it was, i wasn't huge. While I was pregnant, I developed pre-cylemsia which caused me to gain weight roughly 6 to 7 lbs a week. After having him with in 6 weeks i lost back down to around 165. They started me on the depo shot, when I had went back to my yearly exam, I weighed 195. I was totally embaresed. Birth Control was my worst nightmare.

    I am currently at 208, and until I recently saw a photo of myself, I didn't realize how big I had become.

    It is a long journey to get the weight off, but I realize to I didn't put it on overnight and it isn't gonna come off over night.

    So yes you are not alone, I don't like for anyone to know my weight. But it is also our choose to tell or not to tell, But once I hit that goal, then that might be a different story. So if anyone asks just say I needed to get healthy for me and my child, and it is something I have been wanting to do.
  • cscoggins
    cscoggins Posts: 17
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    I feel a very similar way. I have not shared numbers with anyone- not even my husband! haha! Part of this is shame over letting myself get to this point- regardless the circumstances that contributed to it.... part of it is- I don't really care so much about the numbers on the scale. I care much more about the inches around and feeling comfortable in my own skin- being healthy and having energy! Most of my friends are tactful enough not to ask... but there are a few who have said things like, "Are you losing weight?!!" and while I KNOW they are trying to be encouraging and supportive, all I hear is, "I noticed how fat you are- and I am taking note of your weight every time I see you." It makes me feel scrutinized and pressured to take off lbs more quickly than I would generally expect of myself so that they can just STOP scrutinizing me... Some days, I just feel like staying away from social situations until this weight loss journey is over... but I can't hide in a closet- and I don't WANT to!! I am me. I am of value simply BECAUSE I am me!! A scale does not define me. My body does not define me. I am MORE than that! My soul is BEAUTIFUL- and people who cannot see that and love me WHERE I AM AT, are not the kind of people I want in my life. We don't have to share numbers- but why not share the journey with trusted friends/family who see the beauty in you and will be there to point it out to you when you are down? Their kind words and support will be PRICELESS in this journey! We need each other!! :)
  • amandavictoria80
    amandavictoria80 Posts: 734 Member
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    I need to know if I am the only one who feels like this.

    I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, but I am embarrassed to tell people how much I have lost or that I'm even losing weight. I am so ashamed of how heavy I let myself get and I don't really want people to know that I've lost 61 lbs but have another 50 lbs to lose. It's embarrassing.

    Does anyone else out there feel the same way I do?

    You need to feel proud of what you are doing!

    You don't need to tell anyone. You're not doing this for anyone else, right? So, then why care?
    Of course it is embarrassing to be overweight and you are not alone in that shame. We all go through it. But you have no need to feel ashamed of yourself anymore. :) You are doing something to change your life and there is nothing in that to be ashamed or to feel embarrassed about. You lost 61 pounds!!!! That's amazing and I hope you know this!
  • maysflower
    maysflower Posts: 180
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    Thanks to all of you for your support, comments and suggestions. They are all very good and I am working on being proud of my current accomplishments.

    I love MFP! It has saved my life :happy:
  • pkpzp228
    pkpzp228 Posts: 146 Member
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    I feel embarrassed BEING at the gym. I feel so out of shape and out of place whenever I step foot in the gym. I'm sure no one is looking at me, but I'm so self concious it makes me feel all eyes are on the "new girl" (I feel "new" because I go MAYBE once a week - ugh). My husband wants me to go with him and I finally had to break down and explain to him that I feel stupid being there with him. He's so supportive and wonderful with me -- I wish I could go with him and be supportive of HIM without feeling soooo out of place.

    Don't feel embarrassed in the gym. Everyone has a reason to be there and yours is no better or worse than theirs. The more you go to the gym the more you begin to notice that there are a lot of people in there that don't have a clue. The gym is like any other environment that requires a serious personal effort to see results, people that put in the time and the effort to improve their fitness respect those who are making the same efforts...

    The only people that find any reason to admonish another persons efforts towards improving their own lives are the ones you should care the least about. Those people should take a look in the mirror because those opinions are merely reflections of their own shortcomings.


    To the original poster, who cares what other people think, you're here because you've made a decision to improve your lifestyle. To be honest, I think what your saying is a mental crutch, it's an excuse that you're either making to yourself consciously or subconscious to help you deal with the anxiety of undertaking such a difficult transition. Know that every effort you make is one that wasn't being made before, reflect on the choices you make and don't be discouraged by set backs or living up to unrealistic expectations.

    Health is not about running fast, body fat or even a balanced diet. It's about maintaining a positive mental attitude that facilitates making the right choices in diet and exercise and recognizing the effect that your daily choices have on your lifestyle.
  • mfkfoster
    mfkfoster Posts: 331 Member
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    First, Congrats on the weight loss! That's awesome! Second, you don't need to tell people anything! You should be proud of your achievement! If people say that your looking good, just smile and say "Thank You". And know that you've worked hard for that compliment and bask in it's glory! Just imagine the compliments when you lose all your weight!
  • Sneakz16
    Sneakz16 Posts: 1
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    i seriously thought i was alone wit the depo shot and the weight gain im having such a hard time losing it i feel like i have tried everything and i cant even lose a pound i have gotten so desperate to lose weight at this point im willing to do anything
  • tonib29
    tonib29 Posts: 4
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    well done!!!!! thats brilliant, u should def be proud, I I hope I can be as motivated as u xxxx

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