"You don't NEED to lose anymore weight!!!"

ALWAYS, the right answer:

30 lbs in 5 months? That is awesome. You started exactly where I am and are now exactly what I want to be at.
Maybe people are jealous. You were very successful in what so many people fail at. Congrats! Take it as a compliment.

Don't let it mess with your head, I received comments like your heads to big for your body, you're getting to small, you don't look good skinny... lots and lots of *kitten* up comments! All from coworkers within an office environment which was/is completely unprofessional IMO.

100000000 questions about my diet all the time, every day ... trying to explain I just eat healthy and am not on diet was the worst.

They'll start to ask you for help; don't do it man!! it's such a waste of your time! I've done full meal plans, offered free training no one does anything with it. My go to is; I'll help as soon as you invest some time and learn why you need to restrict your calories, do that and track your food for 2 weeks bring me the logs and then we can start. By "they" I mean coworkers I help my friends for free.

I did a bulk for a year after all the comments about being small got to me, you do get the reverse. I had people ask me if I stopped working out, "why'd you quit working out"... "way to fall off" it's like ... there is no pleasing any of these mothers. I was also asked if I was using or am on steroids, people didn't believe that I've done everything 100% natural... it's so annoying

I can legit go on about this and the *kitten* rude people around me for hours!!! at the end of the day I am in year 3 of being smaller, the attention has died off but it comes up with new hires from time to time (not by me). just a FYI I went from 355lbs to 182lbs total of 173lbs lost, I never reached my goal... I wanted to weigh 178lbs so I could say I lost literally half myself ... I could care less now.

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Until it's coming from the doctor, it's just people giving opinions and doesn't matter.

Loads of people feign shock when I say that yes, I plan to lose a lot more weight. They think it's the nice thing to do. I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm not paying them for good advice, you know?

When the doctor says he thinks it's a bad idea, then it's time to listen.

This isn't scientific or anything, but I couldn't help but notice that the few people who have commented negatively on my weight loss ("So, are you done, yet?" "You're going to disappear!") sure could stand to lose a few, themselves.

Just sayin'.

Optimistical1 wrote: »

The wonderful world of being vertically challenged, or as I like better "space efficient."
With all the ups and downs I've been through with my weight at only 5'0", I can completly relate. Another I love, "you ONLY wear a size 5/6?! You are so lucky! I would NOT be dieting if I could squeeze my butt in a size 5!"
What the taller people fail to realize is that at my height, any pant size above a 1 or a 2 means I am overweight. Size 5 is a step away from being obese.
I envy the taller people, from my short prospective, it feels like it would be much less of a struggle to keep the weight down if only I was tall. My husband is 6'1" so he can eat, what seems to me, a massive amount of food and still stay lean. He also burns nearly triple the amount of calories I do when we go hiking together. Must be nice :-(

As a 6'1" woman its exactly the same struggle. Yes, we can eat more. But we burn a lot more. My TDEE is close to 2500 calories. It's very much the same if you were to eat 1250 cals and your TDEE is 1500 vs me eating 2250 if my TDEE is 2500. I'm still just as "calorie deprived" as you are.

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vinegar_husbands wrote: »

This is going to sound unusual, but I never got that from anyone. The closest I got was "Don't go below 85lbs."

Like, of course I wouldn't???

Wow - for what height, out of curiosity? I had a friend who was 5'4 at the time of getting down to 88lbs (from an intestinal disease, not an ED). Because her parents waited forever to take her to the doctor, he (very angrily) told them than if they'd waited just another week, she would've gone into organ failure from the malnutrition. I always wondered if that was true, or if he was being hyperbolic out of concern/anger. 88lbs is ridiculous for 5'4 either way.

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I've made comments before along the lines of telling people I think they look great at their current weight/progress (like I think you look quite lovely yourself!)
But I agree about the rudeness factor. If you're just a coworker or acquaintance, even a casual friend, I wouldn't feel it my place at all to tell you you should stop trying to lose. It's none of my business.
I think the only time I may raise concern is if they're close to me, and they're actually in danger of being underweight/are already underweight wanting to lose more.
All that aside, your goal seems fine. Do you and ignore the rudeness. ^__^

Yes these people are rude, but one thing I would recommend against is lying just to get them off your back. If you say you don't plan to lose any more weight, and then they see you drop 10 more pounds, that could legitimately look like you have some kind of eating disorder. Your lie could indicate that you are in denial, or out of control, or are trying to hide a problem.

I understand it's none of their business, but better responses might be "I'm always re-evaluating and determining my optimal fitness" or "I always check against the BMI chart and am committed to staying in the healthy range", etc.

As has been mentioned, some people are genuinely concerned, but others simply feel threatened by seeing someone succeed. It's sad but true. Your success is like holding a mirror up to them, and people don't like that. In a perverse way, they take your weight loss as a direct comment about their own weight. In other words, if you think you aren't skinny enough, you must be thinking about how fat they are. Hence their need to convince you that you are wrong.

And as also has been mentioned, people honestly don't know what a healthy weight looks like anymore. We're so used to seeing people on the high end or above the proper BMI.

I hate remarks like those. Yesterday I got a "you're going to disappear!" and I nearly responded with "I wish you would!"

PinkPixiexox wrote: »

I just find it strange that losing weight, with a lot of people - can be met with this 'be careful' attitude. No one was telling me to 'be careful' when I was overweight and struggling to walk up the stairs without puffing. My body is now smaller and my heart is far healthier yet NOW i'm getting the concerned warnings despite being physically in a better place. It seems like the general rule is, say nothing about people being overweight but say ALL THE WORDS to someone actively losing. It's a strange one!

Yeah, I've only gotten this a little, but I find it partially weird and partially understandable.

I think people assume, when you are overweight, that you know it and aren't happy about it, so they don't think they need to say anything (and understand that doing so would be impolite in many cases). Also, I suppose when I was fat I'd make comments on occasion so people would know I knew and was generally willing to make fun of myself (which was a little defensive/messed up, no question).

People want to compliment you when you've lost and "you don't need to lose more" can be that, but I also think some are genuinely worried about people getting obsessed with losing and being unable to stop. My pilates instructor (who is thinner than me) kind of grilled me about my goals at one point, for example. With others it's been more casual. I haven't gotten anything really negative like the "too skinny" comments, but I live in a subculture where thinner is still usually better, and I'd likely take even "you are getting too thin" as a veiled compliment (again, which is maybe messed up, but I also know I'm not close to too thin).

Anyway, I tend to just say "oh, I'm just focusing on getting more fit" if someone asks about weight loss (and I also generally won't answer questions about specific weight unless I'm really close with someone). It's really no one's business what my specific loss goals are, and chances are they won't notice. (Or they will be wrong -- I keep getting people asking if I've lost more weight when I've been maintaining for months.)

Azdak wrote: »

1. When you lose a lot of weight, you look much thinner than you are to people who have known you. It's like an optical illusion. Sometimes, you appear a little older. So in some ways it's understandable.
2. In many cases, YOUR weight loss stands in direct contrast to their LACK of weight loss. Even though you have no intention of doing so, your physical presence is a rebuke to their lifestyle habits and it can be threatening. Shaming you about losing more is a way for them to reassert control.

Number 2 is what i tend to get. Seems my friends preferred it when i was 387lb and almost unable to function. Im told i should stop now (211lb) cos some people want to be the clothes size i am now (uk 18) and i should be greatful and would look rediculous any smaller. They also bag on my exercise choices cos everyone knows gentle walking is better for you ( insert eye rolling here) and they were gleefully happy to find a small chocolate bar in my car until i pointed out it was my daughters

When we go out they buy and eat 2 meals each and thats there choice im certainly not going to bash them for it but it doesnt work the other way round sadly