Why is losing weight so effortless for some and so difficult for others?

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kommodevaran
kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Is losing weight supposed to be hard? Every day I read on the forums about people struggling. My experience is that it takes some commitment, some planning, some reading up, but I don't feel deprived or restricted. Is my impression skewed by the fact that those who don't struggle, usually don't post? What makes losing and maintaing difficult, and what makes it easy? I find this intriguing. What is your opinion? (Am I just being cocky?)
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Replies

  • yarwell
    yarwell Posts: 10,477 Member
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    Your 1700 cal intake might be more than some can dream of.
  • snowflake930
    snowflake930 Posts: 2,188 Member
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    Everyone is different and a lot of factors enter into success and/or failure in each of our lives. We can not judge others by our own success or failure as we never really know what goes on in anyone else's life that could contribute to their experience.

    I personally do not think it is easy for anyone. It takes self control and discipline and some have more than others.
  • distinctlybeautiful
    distinctlybeautiful Posts: 1,041 Member
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    What ⬆ said. I see a lot of people with calorie goals around 1200, and considering that's the minimum a person should be eating - and considering most people dropped to that goal from a place of overeating - it's no wonder it feels so hard. I used to do the real low calorie thing because I thought that was the right thing to do to lose and lose quickly. Now I know better, and it's not nearly as difficult.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    edited September 2015
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    yarwell wrote: »
    Your 1700 cal intake might be more than some can dream of.

    But those who lose/maintain on less are usually smaller and/or less active? And I should point out that I'm in maintenance!
  • auddii
    auddii Posts: 15,357 Member
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    kommodevaran wrote: »
    Is losing weight supposed to be hard? Every day I read on the forums about people struggling. My experience is that it takes some commitment, some planning, some reading up, but I don't feel deprived or restricted. Is my impression skewed by the fact that those who don't struggle, usually don't post? What makes losing and maintaing difficult, and what makes it easy? I find this intriguing. What is your opinion? (Am I just being cocky?)

    When I'm mentally engaged in weight loss, I find this as well. But I feel like my "default" state is eating tons of food. Because of this, I work my butt off so that I am able to eat more (I lose eating 2100 calories a day).

    However, I have issues with binging, then the emotional toll after a binge, and continued emotional eating. I can spiral our of control relatively quickly, so I tend to lose for a chunk, regain a little, maintain, lose again...

    I think the concept is simple, but the mental aspect of weight loss (or weight gain for that matter) is the hard part.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    snowflake930 wrote: »
    Everyone is different and a lot of factors enter into success and/or failure in each of our lives. We can not judge others by our own success or failure as we never really know what goes on in anyone else's life that could contribute to their experience.

    I personally do not think it is easy for anyone. It takes self control and discipline and some have more than others.

    I don't see myself as disciplined and I don't think I have a lot of self control. So I struggle to understand.
  • KateTii
    KateTii Posts: 886 Member
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    I have found losing weight easy. I don't have much to lose (my start weight is some people's goal weight) and from what i've seen, the less you have to lose, the harder it gets (due to shrinking deficit).

    I find it comes down to mainly motivation and self control. No matter how much weight a person has to lose, they have to really want to lose it and have that control over saying no even when the double fudge ooey gooey rainbow sparkle cookies come out (well, that is if it doesn't fit into their day/week).

    When I started, I knew this would be for life. I knew it would be something that would mean I would have to never eat the same way again (well, apart from holidays/vacations/special occasions). I am someone that cannot be motivated by others but have to be internally motivated - and I did just that.

    The thing is, it IS hard to make sustainable, lifelong changes that suddenly fit into your pre-existing life. And not everyone can do it first go and find it a breeze. I think it comes down to personality, pre-existing habits and a bit of luck.
  • Sandra37405
    Sandra37405 Posts: 20 Member
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    Because life isn't fair.
  • TheopolisAmbroiseIII
    TheopolisAmbroiseIII Posts: 197 Member
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    I don't understand why some people seem to be unable to stay away from alcohol, tobacco, marijuana, or coffee. Everyone has different levels of drive and obsessions with different dopamine producing pleasures.

    Some people can't start a day without a cup of coffee, and can't go all day without a bunch more. I have had coffee about 3 times this year and didn't enjoy it either time.

    For some people, a day without an alcoholic drink is a ruined day. I'm in my late 30s and I can count the number of alcoholic drinks I've had in my life without going double digits.

    Some days I'm able to stick under my calorie restriction with some good choices and exercise and not feel bad. However some days I hit my limit and then feel like if I can't eat any more today I'll go crazy.

    If losing weight and eating right is so easy for you, how did you get to the point of needing to lose weight in the first place?
  • KateTii
    KateTii Posts: 886 Member
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    kommodevaran wrote: »
    yarwell wrote: »
    Your 1700 cal intake might be more than some can dream of.

    But those who lose/maintain on less are usually smaller and/or less active?

    Regardless of how small I am or how active i've been - I still want to eat just as much as someone who has a calorie budget twice as big as mine. I just know I can't without eventually gaining. Just because I maintain on X calories, doesn't mean I can eat what I want and be satisfied without moderation on X calories.
  • TheopolisAmbroiseIII
    TheopolisAmbroiseIII Posts: 197 Member
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    Fastbiceps wrote: »
    Not hard
    calories in vs calories out, genetic and metabolism play a huge factor
    Knew a guy that always stays at 12 percent bodyfat and wouldn't gain weight no matter how much he ate
    Metabolism plays very little factor. +/- a few percent, which translates to maybe 100-200 calories per day difference, all things being equal.

    Chances are this guy you knew only overate in social situations and ate sensibly most of the time, or he had a very active job or lifestyle that kept him trim despite his large food intake.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    auddii wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    Is losing weight supposed to be hard? Every day I read on the forums about people struggling. My experience is that it takes some commitment, some planning, some reading up, but I don't feel deprived or restricted. Is my impression skewed by the fact that those who don't struggle, usually don't post? What makes losing and maintaing difficult, and what makes it easy? I find this intriguing. What is your opinion? (Am I just being cocky?)

    When I'm mentally engaged in weight loss, I find this as well. But I feel like my "default" state is eating tons of food. Because of this, I work my butt off so that I am able to eat more (I lose eating 2100 calories a day).

    However, I have issues with binging, then the emotional toll after a binge, and continued emotional eating. I can spiral our of control relatively quickly, so I tend to lose for a chunk, regain a little, maintain, lose again...

    I think the concept is simple, but the mental aspect of weight loss (or weight gain for that matter) is the hard part.

    I have to stay focused, but I enjoy meal planning and cooking now. I used to overeat (food) because I "didn't believe in portions" and had a skewed opinion on the meaning of "full". My new "normal" or "default" is now to eat until satisfied, and then wait until next meal to eat again. I believed I had emotional problems around food, but I think now that I just need great taste, and that junk tastes a lot, but never satisfies me. It's easier just to not buy and (try to) keep junk in the house, and I sure don't miss it, because the food I eat now satisfies my wants and my needs.
  • honkytonks85
    honkytonks85 Posts: 669 Member
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    People who are shorter and lighter have fewer calories to work with. If you are 5'3 and weigh 65kg unfortunately you need to cut calories pretty much down to 1200 calories to create a reasonable deficit and be super accurate with your logging.
  • anicole0102
    anicole0102 Posts: 48 Member
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    [quote= (Am I just being cocky?)[/quote]
    yes LOL
    distinctlybeautiful wrote: »
    What ⬆ said. I see a lot of people with calorie goals around 1200, and considering that's the minimum a person should be eating - and considering most people dropped to that goal from a place of overeating - it's no wonder it feels so hard. I used to do the real low calorie thing because I thought that was the right thing to do to lose and lose quickly. Now I know better, and it's not nearly as difficult.

    I think (at least for me) it is mentally tough. Do I have plenty of calories to get me through the day in a way where I am not deprived. YES! Would I be able to have more of a deficit if I worked out regularly. SURE. But the truth is I am a mother of 5-ranging from 16-2 months and sometimes my mental state isn't the best and more often than not I don't get to work out. THIS ISN'T AN EXCUSE though don't get me wrong, ( i know it sounds like one) but I know where my pitfall is and I am working on it. But everyone has there own issues. You may find that yours is maintaining, or gaining muscle at a certain point-or maybe you have none. In which case congrats and glad you are here for the support.
  • suziecue20
    suziecue20 Posts: 567 Member
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    KateTii wrote: »
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    yarwell wrote: »
    Your 1700 cal intake might be more than some can dream of.

    But those who lose/maintain on less are usually smaller and/or less active?

    Regardless of how small I am or how active i've been - I still want to eat just as much as someone who has a calorie budget twice as big as mine. I just know I can't without eventually gaining. Just because I maintain on X calories, doesn't mean I can eat what I want and be satisfied without moderation on X calories.

    Yes...this is true for me and I expect a lot of other short people.

  • snowflake930
    snowflake930 Posts: 2,188 Member
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    Sandra37405 wrote: »
    Because life isn't fair.
    TheopolisAmbroiseIII wrote: »
    If losing weight and eating right is so easy for you, how did you get to the point of needing to lose weight in the first place?

    People are all different. What is easy for you is difficult for someone else. It doesn't matter what the issue is. I don't understand why that is hard for you to understand OP.

  • kristen6350
    kristen6350 Posts: 1,094 Member
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    Because weight loss is mostly mental. Some people can easily get in the zone - want it more than the next food temptation. Some people don't want it that bad. It's like quitting smoking. If you really want to, you can. But it takes work.

    When I'm mentally engaged and want to lose those last 5 pounds it's pretty easy. I buy the right things to eat, I prepare them, I don't eat out that often. My main goal is to lose weight. When I'm not mentally engaged, eating lots of yummy things and being lazy wins out.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    Options
    KateTii wrote: »
    I have found losing weight easy. I don't have much to lose (my start weight is some people's goal weight) and from what i've seen, the less you have to lose, the harder it gets (due to shrinking deficit).

    I find it comes down to mainly motivation and self control. No matter how much weight a person has to lose, they have to really want to lose it and have that control over saying no even when the double fudge ooey gooey rainbow sparkle cookies come out (well, that is if it doesn't fit into their day/week).

    When I started, I knew this would be for life. I knew it would be something that would mean I would have to never eat the same way again (well, apart from holidays/vacations/special occasions). I am someone that cannot be motivated by others but have to be internally motivated - and I did just that.

    The thing is, it IS hard to make sustainable, lifelong changes that suddenly fit into your pre-existing life. And not everyone can do it first go and find it a breeze. I think it comes down to personality, pre-existing habits and a bit of luck.

    I've seen both - having much to lose is easier because your body burns more and you have more wiggle room; having less to lose is easier because your habits don't need to be changed so drastically.

    I have found that maikng many tiny changes to my habits has been helpful. I still have no willpower.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
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    Last year, I found that eating in a deficit for a long time was fairly easy. I spent about 80% of the year in a deficit, sometimes months at a stretch.

    This year, I have found it extremely difficult to eat at a deficit for more than 5-6 weeks at a time. I have more muscle, which I don't want to lose. I have more strength, which wanes after a certain amount of calorie cutting. I'm at the point where I literally only care about losing fat from one specific part of my body, which is frustrating as hell because spot reduction is impossible.

    For me, losing weight is very hard right now. I just want to be done with it so I can focus on building muscle and getting stronger. This year has been really hard because I'm finding it difficult to see any differences in the mirror or on the scale. Other people see it on me but all I see is what's left to accomplish.

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