Hating the attention I'm getting....
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I am personally loving every time someone tells me I've lost weight! Although in the back of my mind I'm like "wow I guess I was a lot bigger than I thought" but all in all it helps me stay motivated knowing that the results are showing! I say embrace it!0
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It's my favourite part!! , but when I get comments about putting on weight
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- they're used to seeing you look a certain way, and the change is weird for them.
- most people suck at trying to lose weight, because of all the crap out there. when they see someone succeed, they think it's magic/an illness/something's wrong.
- some are insecure about their own weight.
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As a guy, I'm sure my experience is a little different. A lot of guys (mostly male shop) comment on my loss. It's mostly the same thing "hey, you look like you've lost for weight". Then a follow up of "what are you doing?"
Usually I will tell them how I'm not eating like a fatass any more and pimp MFP, sometimes I open with "Chicago meth and Twinkie diet".
None of their comments and questions are laced with malice or sarcasm, General positive support from everyone.
Yes, it does get repetitive to the same questions from over 100 people, so yes a little annoying. But I take it in stride, part of the process of being fat most of the time working with the same people,and then being 45 pounds lighter few months later0 -
I'm am an adult and unless it's my doctor, it's zero % others peoples business. If someone comments about how I look, I just start commenting about their diet and weight and they usually shut right up. People should mind their own business. You're adult so set limits. If people are crossing them it's probably because you aren't setting limits. What you allow is what will continue to happen.0
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clgaram720 wrote: »Look up MBTI INTJ. I think you're a unicorn like me.
Me too. And I wouldn't have it any other way.
That said, I struggled with the extra attention when I first started losing weight. The questions didn't bother me too much, but being looked at did. I just had to change my perpsective, and embrace it. So I started wearing flattering clothes. By presenting myself in a different way, it was empowering instead of awkward. Finding out how to do that was personally difficult, but objectively easy.
Actually, it was quite nice seeing the reactions then, since my efforts had the intended effect.0 -
If someone says " you've lost weight"or comments like that I've found telling them back they put on a few pounds and look well usually shuts them up.
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Why is that everyone feels the need to start commenting when you lose weight? Every time I lose weight (this isn't my first time at the weight loss rodeo) this is the part I truly detest.
So far this week my choice of lunch during a meeting was commented on because it was "not enough".
I've been told I'm disappearing. ???
That was topped off with a "don't go losing too much." WTF?!?!?!?
I should be blowing if off, but it really makes me uncomfortable and starts giving me a complex! I don't like attention being drawn to myself and this is making me stand out. I guess it's my issue. Just don't know why people have trouble shutting their mouths.
People are jealous. Just be who you are and let it roll off your back. Insecure people will try and break you down. You look wonderful!0 -
It's the opposite for me, I eat a chocolate bar and people in work are like 'Ooh thought you were being good'. I feel silly saying 'Actually I logged this Mars Bar 3 days ago', so I just laugh :')
just ignore comments and do what you're doing
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I was telling my amazing aunt about my success so far and my sister walked up and scoffed when she heard what I was talking about. My aunt said, "You know what they say when you lose weight, right? Your friends find them!"
I guess she didn't think my sister was being very nice, so she basically told her she was looking heavier.... It was glorious. My sis has been a real ***** about me losing weight and she's still in denial about what it would take to actually do it. I love her to death, but she needs to quit being jealous and actually do something about it besides calling attention to my flaws to make herself feel better...0 -
People just talk about anything. It's like when you're pregnant and everyone asks how long you've got left. I am not sure why you are taking offence If it wasn't your weight, they'd comment on your new hair colour etc etc. That's just human nature.
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This is so relevant!
About 5 minutes ago, I was standing in the kitchen at work making a coffee and a colleague stopped for a 'chat'. Of course, the 'chat' was (once again) about how much weight I have lost and how I keep getting smaller and smaller every time she see's me! I've always been fairly shy and self aware so inwardly I was absolutely cringing! Ultimately though, I think people mean well and they are simply trying to pay some kind of compliment.
When people tell me 'not to go losing too much weight', I tend to think they are hinting that I'm 'just fine as I am' which really, is a nice thing for them to say - if a little familiar! 0 -
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Go to lunch with a different group.0
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Luckily, I work from home and live far away from family. So All I really have to deal with is one friend who knows everything there is to know about losing weight, yet fails to lose any and names 1,000 reasons why. (None of which are true.)
And my mom over the phone, who simply can't lose weight because "insert excuse here," and how easy it is for me because i'm "Young." I'm 44. lol And then she tells me that when I reach menopause, nothing I do will stop the weight from piling on, "You just wait and see, there's nothing you can do! It's just what happens to women." I was so frustrated with her yesterday, I flat out told her that's bull*** and if she thinks it was easy for me, she's just wrong. I worked hard and will continue to work hard at keeping it off! I never bring up the topic of my weight loss to anyone, they always start the conversation but I always seem to end up completely frustrated.
My husband, on the other hand, can't keep his hands off me, which is a good thing most days, and has been nothing but supportive.
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clgaram720 wrote: »Why is that everyone feels the need to start commenting when you lose weight? Every time I lose weight (this isn't my first time at the weight loss rodeo) this is the part I truly detest.
So far this week my choice of lunch during a meeting was commented on because it was "not enough".
I've been told I'm disappearing. ???
That was topped off with a "don't go losing too much." WTF?!?!?!?
I should be blowing if off, but it really makes me uncomfortable and starts giving me a complex! I don't like attention being drawn to myself and this is making me stand out. I guess it's my issue. Just don't know why people have trouble shutting their mouths.
Look up MBTI INTJ. I think you're a unicorn like me.
Another INTJ over here!0 -
I don't mind the comments. It helps to keep me motivated. I appreciated comments like "you look great, keep it up!" However, I have one coworker who keeps blurting out "Skinny", when I walk by. I am by no means skinny, I am still in the obese range. To me that is just lying (I admit, my OCD may be coming into play here!)0
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I don't mind comments. I don't get that many of them from people other than my close family or friends, who generally say "you look great" or something like that. I've not had one negative comment.0
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your changing is making people uncomfortable. its their problem not yrs.0
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I hate the attention. When I started drinking protein shakes at work instead of eating the white bread on offer (I work in a school, so that's pretty much the basic snack) more than one person (whom I've never talked about weight loss with, and don't even talk much with in general) asked me if I was on a diet, because they thought it was "diet shakes".
I dislike the comments, especially as I'm nowhere near my goal weight - I haven't even reached halfway! So commenting on me "getting smaller" or whatever, just reminds me that I've been fat the whole time I've worked there and that the person commenting on it has noticed - it does not motivate me or make me happy. Just the opposite. It makes me self-concious and it's none of their business -- unless I invite the conversation by bringing it up!
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Thanks for all the thoughts. I agree that I need to work on coping with this better. I've had a negative body image forever, and I'm trying so hard to get to where I feel good and comfortable with myself. I've made huge changes in my food choices, counting calories/weighing food, joining a gym and working out.... I do look different, and that's an adjustment too. I guess it's my own self hatred that sets me off when anyone comments on my appearance. Need to add that to the list of things to work on....
I empathize with you. My MIL was so worried about me losing my chubby cheeks when I was bragging to her about losing my double chin and gaining visible collar bones...sigh!0 -
I got called "skinny" the other day. I know she means it as a compliment, but even so, it's not true. I'm dead center in the overweight range. I'm not even at a healthy weight or body fat. I'm certainly not "skinny".
People just have skewed perceptions on what is even healthy anymore.0 -
It can be annoying. Especially when I'm stuffing my face at parties and get told 'how do you stay so skinny?' (which I'm definitely not) by people I see once or twice a year.
On the other hand, when you see family members that you haven't seen in months and they don't even acknowledge that you've lost 80 pounds, it kinda stinks too. I wonder if it's because they're convinced that I'll gain the weight back or something... or they still think I'm fat anyway. Who knows.0 -
It can be annoying. Especially when I'm stuffing my face at parties and get told 'how do you stay so skinny?' (which I'm definitely not) by people I see once or twice a year.
On the other hand, when you see family members that you haven't seen in months and they don't even acknowledge that you've lost 80 pounds, it kinda stinks too. I wonder if it's because they're convinced that I'll gain the weight back or something... or they still think I'm fat anyway. Who knows.
ALL of this!
If i'm eating something quite 'high', I've had comments such as "Where do you PUT it all?!". I just rub my stomach contentedly!
As for seeing family members and getting absolutely no recognition - I sometimes feel like stripping off hysterically whilst screeching "CAN'T YOU SEE THIS?!". Ah well.0 -
I'm right there with you. I hate when people make those kind of comments about my weight loss. A simple, genuine compliment like an "oh you look good" or something is different than a "wow haha you're disappearing you should eat more"
It used to bother me a lot more than it does now, mostly because I realized that in MOST cases (in my personal experience anywho) they're saying things like that out of jealousy. Some people just don't want to see others succeed on their journey, which really sucks.
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I have a friend who has lost a significant amount of weight. Every time I see her, she is smaller than she was before. I am a little tired of always commenting about her weight loss, but I'm afraid if I don't say something to acknowledge it, then she will think I am jealous or not happy for her (neither of which is true). Opinions on whether I should keep complimenting her or shut my trap?0
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Once in a while I'll get the "stop losing weight" comments,
and usually my response is "thank you for your concern".
Then change the subject or walk away.
I'm still about 30 lb over a healthy weight (top end of the green range for BMI).
So no, I'm not going to stop.0 -
I have a friend who has lost a significant amount of weight. Every time I see her, she is smaller than she was before. I am a little tired of always commenting about her weight loss, but I'm afraid if I don't say something to acknowledge it, then she will think I am jealous or not happy for her (neither of which is true). Opinions on whether I should keep complimenting her or shut my trap?
You don't have to say something every time you see her. Has she actually given you reason to think she'd be offended if you didn't say anything? Regardless, you are under no friendship or moral obligation to comment on her weight/appearance every time you see her.0 -
I get this a lot. It's irritating as hell. When I was 60lbs overweight, no one said a word. Drop some pounds, they come out of the woodwork commenting about what they think you should eat, when, why...
"Is it okay for you to be eating that?"
"You are getting too skinny."
"You are wasting away."
Mind you I'm 5'6" and 160 lbs at maintenance. I'm NOT at risk of starving to death.
There's a woman at work who is a feeder. She would constantly offer me food, and say things like "With all that running you do, you can eat the calories." I finally sat her down in my office and told her I have an eating disorder, and she needed to stop offering me food. Do not feed me. Do not comment on what I'm eating. Ever.0
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