Depression and Weight Loss

shelleygold wrote: »

Dear Rabbit and others.
Welcome to our thread where you will find open mindedness, compassion and a surprising degree of tolerance for human individuality. Rather than see mental health challenges as weakness, here, we discuss and compare our unique experiences both honestly and respectfuly and create a learning space where information is disseminated and discussed in a fair and balanced way.
I have been so impressed with the degree of sophistication in contributors and I wonder if it is less about people trying to sound like experts and specialists and more about regular people sharing their subjective and personal experiences. I have been aware of an unprecedented sense of acceptance and care in this room and Rabbit, you are welcome here and who knows, you may pick up some tips on an alternative way people communicate.
In terms of an apology, I agree completely. When you wrote that you were not a "special snowflake", I recall feeling a bit wounded and retaliated by offering an alternative label (OCD). I agree that no labels ought to be part of banter and I apologise. It was meant in fun. Again my apologies .
I learned a lot participating in that thread and have no regrets. But I am glad to be back in this environment where being right is not nearly as important as being treated with respect and openness in a nonthreatening way.
Thanks
Shel

Shel,

The above only reinforces my initial opinion of you. I did see some of the exchange in the thread, but thought at first you might have been joking directed at yourself regarding the OCD comment. But the thread was shut down before I saw the complete exchange. I do actually think that despite some using the term in a negative way quite often at some level everyone IS in fact a "special snowflake". We all have different things that drive our behaviors.

But at any rate, having seen your mindful manner on this thread, your willingness to apologize for any insulting comment, intentional or not, does reinforce to me that you are not willing to judge another in any light that you would not judge yourself. And I will personally assure you that in a similar light, people can assume to know my feelings and intentions better than I do. But there was no "white knight" complex involved in my wishing to take one side or another of an exchange that I didn't even see. It was a sincere observation from me that you would not IMO inflict any intentional damage on another in the form of judgement.

That's one of the reasons why IMO you are such a worthy "tribe leader" here.

shelleygold wrote: »

Hi again,
I wonder how moods such as Depression, Anxiety, Bipolar etc impact our judgements when we are confronted with problems to solve in relation to interpersonal or social exchanges? I reflect on Rabbit's sense that I offended him with the reference to OCD which triggered in him a significant response rather than a light hearted reaction. I know that when I am feeling down, have gained weight, or experience anxiety, my processing of information and my ability to see things in different ways reduces to a very limited level and I am left (stuck) with an interpretation or conclusion which is often unhelpful. Taking this further, the impact(s) we may have on others may also be "collateral" damage when they are interacting with us and not aware or even prepared for how we are perceiving and processing. I feel sad that I may have caused someone a degree of upset and will evaluate my "standard operating procedures" both when I am calm and level handed and when I get triggered and become changed somehow in my cognitive functioning. I would appreciate hearing from people who have also reflected on they react to stressful interactions and emotionally charged exchanges both when calmness and emotional regulation is occurring and when the reverse is true. Perhaps this discussion will tease out strategies that one can use to manage not just the moods themselves but the accompanying choices we make when interacting with others. For example, should we let people know when we are struggling so that our responses can be seen against the backdrop of where we are at emotionally? Do we need to go that far? I do not think we should have to apologize for who we are and at the same time I think I have a responsibility to ensure that those people in my world are not negatively impacted by me. I struggle with this. I would love to hear your views.

Shel

Regarding this, I at the current time have no diagnosis or tendencies of a "day to day" type of disorder that I am consciously aware of. Though I must be mindful of my PTSD on a regular basis, I have been fortunate that it only rears it's head on occasion, and I usually see that coming due to understanding my triggers fairly well.

But within the normal moods swings I experienced both before and after my PTSD incidents, I think any swing certainly can impact our interactions on a daily basis. I think it would be challenging to find someone who claims to have never made a poor decision due to their mood at some time. And I think for the most part those who have at some point either been diagnosed with a mental health disorder, or just try to understand them better are better equipped to understand and somewhat control these swings, which might include knowing when to limit decisions that might end up biased. I know I attended a number of groups which were attended by people with many differing diagnosis, and a standing rule in most groups was "to never judge any persons struggle in recovery as lesser than your own". I now try to apply this to every interaction I have, as I feel that removing judgement always gives me a more defined focus on the interaction.

So for me, my primary goal is to always be aware and mindful of my mood state, especially when my PTSD triggers can't be avoided for some reason. But I have made my direct family and all close friends aware of my diagnosis and symptoms, and ask them to kindly and gently remind me if they feel any triggers are pushing my buttons. As well as let them know there are times I will isolate somewhat until I reduce my triggers and get myself back into a better state. I feel it's only fair to them to let them know I am attempting to reduce any "collateral damage" as you phrased it, before the fact. I don't need or desire any regrets in addition to whatever was causing my triggers to be affecting me. I have also done this with people I know on a less personal level, such as a former boss, if they might not see it and take it as just not caring about my job that day.


I think you've done a great job in your self reflection Shel. Nobody should have to apologize for who they are ever. But I think you most likely do a better job at not negatively impacting others than most other humans, myself included, do. You seem to excel at being considerate of all around you.

Hey guys. I have struggled with generalized anxiety and panic attacks for about 8 years and this is my first time dealing with depression. Over the past three months the depression has gotten pretty intense. I have hopes that the new medicine I am taking will help me get back to my normal self. As most of you know, it takes about 8 weeks to really get a feel for it.

I feel good today. I worry a bit about tomorrow. But I find myself coping a little better each day. I personally handled the weight loss and depression/anxiety issue with my dr by deciding to do meal replacement shakes twice a day. That has actually helped me feel really in control (even if it's only a small portion of my life right now). Depression and anxiety can really make you feel like you have no control or ability to make any clear decision. So it's nice to have a tool to help me through the hard days. Being able to focus on one healthy meal and two snacks has made it much more feasible for me right now as opposed to how overwhelming it can feel to even get out of bed some days when you are depressed, let along make clear decisions all day long.

I'm happy I found this thread. It helps me know I am not alone. I've certainly felt over the past few months like no one understands what I've been going through, and I see now, that many of you here do. Please feel free to add me.

I am also of the general consensus that the exercise is helpful with channeling my anxiety and depression into something productive, when I can actually get out of bed... So on my good days, like today, when I've beat the fatigue, and mustered up enough energy, I keep my workout shoes and sweatpants nearby in case I have the urge to squeeze in a workout.


My thought:
We can only do what we can do based on the limitations of the moment that we are in. The good thing is, with the passing of each moment, another follows behind it.

Thanks Shel. It was tough. Due to a medical condition, I had to cancel or postpone everything. I'm recovered, the sun was out today, and I worked on the trail in the woods behind my house for over an hour, which cheered me up. I'll see family tomorrow.

On the 23rd I was feeling so nauseated, I couldn't eat much of anything all day. For a moment that morning I actually hoped that I had norovirus, and that it would be unwise for anyone to come to our house or for us to go out. Unfortunately, on the 25th I felt better and everything went off as planned. I ate cookies, fudge, candy and all the holiday meals. But, I had given myself "permission" to eat freely, so I don't feel bad at all. There was one meal in particular that I stopped eating half way through. It was an emotional evening, and I could feel the lump of emotion in my belly. I am getting better at noticing that feeling. I am so ready for everything to get back to normal. I get anxious, overwhelmed and depressed without my routine. Ready for 2016!

Sorry to hear that a couple had kinks in their holiday plans, or extra stress involved. December is usually a tougher month for me regardless of my mindset. Several deaths in the family happened in December, and I share a birthday with my mom who is also now gone. So for me, as much as we enjoy Christmas, overall December can just be a big reminder of people I care about who are now gone.

But I just try to make it a positive thing, and I'm glad I cared enough about all of them to miss them.

amypocock wrote: »

One of the biggest lessons I've been taught, particularly when I'm feeling depressed is to try and just nourish my body with good stuff rather then comfort food. See food as a fuel only and before I know it, the feeling will pass. I've always suffered from depression and emotional eating but right now, with the combination of cutting out refined sugar, good meds, great counsellor and exercise every day, I'm the best I've ever been. But I did change everything in one go, I've very much eased in to this over a three month period.

Thank you! Food as fuel!

shelleygold wrote: »

Hi again,
I find it interesting that I stumble upon our thread (daily not really knowing if I have much to offer.I still have my moods, still struggle with excessive belly fat (was reading about it on the internet today...awful connotations: mid-life spread, deadly fat which surrounds organs etc.) and my little world which truly reflects the choices I have made until now and the choices of the people around me that I have included in my inner sanctum. So....we all live in a context don't we? I guess we show each other our contexts (bubbles) with each breath we take, each posting, each decision and virtually everything we say and do. Somedays, I think I am in charge of my world and most days I am at it's mercy. I imagine that the instant we are catapulted out of the womb (rather unceremoniously), we find ourselves in the world which we have to continue to negotiate and problem-solve around. For a few years, we rely on the intelligence, values, priorities and choices of others as our brains continue to develop and complete its essential growth and construction...And then, we decide how we are going to manage the uncertainty and complexities of our world, our relationships, our work, our families and our needs. I think where I am going with this is that the expectations we create, and the demands we place on ourselves and others may offer some hints in terms of why we might find ourselves moving into moods and belief systems that stop us from being present, interfere with being content and create deep feelings of unease and ongoing confusion. My big stomach is not the biggest problem. How I respond to it is. MY body is not the enemy of the state. It is a reflection of so many of my patterns and choices first taught to me, then influenced by my world and then solely my responsibility. Wow, if that is true, then I can develop a positive relationship with this persistent and rascally part of me and create for both of us a friendship which would allow me to treat it with respect, dignity and careful, INTENTIONAL choices. Hmmmm. So, when I feel like getting back to old patterns and choices, I may just move myself to this awareness level, one which requires my brain to activate and who knows... I may actually create new patterns and decisions.
Hey, here is a challenge. If you go along with my rambling.. Let's each start with baby steps.
Once a week, write on this post ONE thing that you choose to do differently . Something small and easy. And reflect on how that choice changes an outcome or more than one. Let's test this theory of the brain "that changes itself". Lets expand My Fitness Pal to I choose to see myself as my fitness pal. You in????
S

I'm in! I am going to go to bed earlier!

danced my butt off on new years which made me happy, ran 13 miles sunday and still had a "rough" few days. thank you TOM. i'm looking forward to settling down.