We broke up because...
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He had me in there and I finally escaped!0
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she escaped my clutches.0
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Made me eat weird cereal0
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She was in love with a serial killer!0
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didn't like my cereal!! it's killer!!0
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He was always thinking that fiber optics were reading his mind!0
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Wouldn't tell me what was on her mind0
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I gave him a piece of my mind and he bolted!0
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I wanted a piece of her heart. She gave me a finger.
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He didn't like my affectionate sign language!0
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She kept on Speaking in tongues at night and then smacked me0
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He left me just for having Night Terrors!
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Always screaming at night..I couldn't sleep0
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punched me in the face at night and she would constantly kick me in my private when I was sleeping I'm pretty sure she was doing it so I wouldn't have kids0
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..Iwas a restless sleeper..he wouldn't believe me 0
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hogged the bed. I wanted my space.0
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She wanted so much space that she moved to her own house0
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She burned down my house0
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she convinced me to burn her house down for half of the insurance money but she used me and left with all the money0
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She was broke and I just couldn't afford her fancy ways0
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