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"Tell Me I'm Fat"

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Replies

  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,970 Member
    Listened to this a few days ago with my girlfriend. We both found it thought-provoking and riveting. It was very sympathetic to the fat acceptance idea.

    One of the speakers, the lady who had lost a great deal of weight and kept it off, kept saying she was a better person when she was heavy than when she was thin. This didn't make sense to me. I understand being depressed at being treated differently, but, if you aren't treating other people unfairly...? Then she talked about going to Mexico to buy speed pills illegally and her moral qualms became less mysterious.

    I'm seeing much less change in the way people treat me than was described in the program. I'm sure a lot of that is because I'm a man, and because I'm already in a stable relationship and job.
  • Char231023
    Char231023 Posts: 702 Member
    zamphir66 wrote: »
    JaneiR36 wrote: »

    If those are the proponents you're familiar with, then I guess that's your experience. But to be perfectly frank, I find it a bit hard to believe that proponents of "health" at every size are doing absolutely nothing healthy, and suspect that a limited definition of "health" might be in play.

    The HAES proponents I'm familiar with say things like:
    * Intentional weight loss is self-harm.
    * No one ever feels better by losing weight -- it's psychosomatic, or social pressure, or ... something.
    * Being obese is actually normal, because we evolved from "aquatic apes."
    * Not being attracted to someone who is obese is equivalent to racism, homophobia, etc.
    * Doctors should never suggest weight loss. Instead, they should suggest only what they would also suggest to a thin person with the same problem.
    * Fat does not cause health problems; it's the other way around.

    Granted, I've probably only been exposed to the fringe elements. But then, the fringe always seems to be the most vocal. I wasn't actually aware of a more "normal" faction of HAES.

    This and they also say if you are happy with you self at your obese weight why would you want to lose weight.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,725 Member
    zamphir66 wrote: »
    JaneiR36 wrote: »

    If those are the proponents you're familiar with, then I guess that's your experience. But to be perfectly frank, I find it a bit hard to believe that proponents of "health" at every size are doing absolutely nothing healthy, and suspect that a limited definition of "health" might be in play.

    The HAES proponents I'm familiar with say things like:
    * Intentional weight loss is self-harm.
    * No one ever feels better by losing weight -- it's psychosomatic, or social pressure, or ... something.
    * Being obese is actually normal, because we evolved from "aquatic apes."
    * Not being attracted to someone who is obese is equivalent to racism, homophobia, etc.
    * Doctors should never suggest weight loss. Instead, they should suggest only what they would also suggest to a thin person with the same problem.
    * Fat does not cause health problems; it's the other way around.

    Granted, I've probably only been exposed to the fringe elements. But then, the fringe always seems to be the most vocal. I wasn't actually aware of a more "normal" faction of HAES.

    Again, weight weight weight weight. Is that all there is to health, or the person for that matter? The claim I found hard to believe was that they were doing nothing healthy
    Char231023 wrote: »
    zamphir66 wrote: »
    JaneiR36 wrote: »

    If those are the proponents you're familiar with, then I guess that's your experience. But to be perfectly frank, I find it a bit hard to believe that proponents of "health" at every size are doing absolutely nothing healthy, and suspect that a limited definition of "health" might be in play.

    The HAES proponents I'm familiar with say things like:
    * Intentional weight loss is self-harm.
    * No one ever feels better by losing weight -- it's psychosomatic, or social pressure, or ... something.
    * Being obese is actually normal, because we evolved from "aquatic apes."
    * Not being attracted to someone who is obese is equivalent to racism, homophobia, etc.
    * Doctors should never suggest weight loss. Instead, they should suggest only what they would also suggest to a thin person with the same problem.
    * Fat does not cause health problems; it's the other way around.

    Granted, I've probably only been exposed to the fringe elements. But then, the fringe always seems to be the most vocal. I wasn't actually aware of a more "normal" faction of HAES.

    This and they also say if you are happy with you self at your obese weight why would you want to lose weight.

    You may not have the same answer as the next person, but IMO it's a legit question. It's actually pretty sensible to change things you're unhappy about and not the other way round
  • extra_medium
    extra_medium Posts: 1,525 Member
    edited July 2016
    NorthCascades wrote: »
    I'm seeing much less change in the way people treat me than was described in the program. I'm sure a lot of that is because I'm a man, and because I'm already in a stable relationship and job.

    That, and I think a lot of your own perception will dictate how you feel you're being viewed or treated by others. If others' opinions are no big deal to you, naturally you'll notice less of a difference. If you walk around feeling like you're an outcast, you'll definitely think everyone is staring at you and judging your lifestyle choices.
    In reality I think most people don't really care either way if you're overweight and eating a cheeseburger in public because they have their own insecurities to be wrapped up in.

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