Date decided I was too fat after getting naked

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Replies

  • lhnc
    lhnc Posts: 1 Member
    This is so obviously HIS ISSUE. You deserve better, and don't let his issue define you!
  • laur357
    laur357 Posts: 896 Member
    People are attracted to different things, and physically I think they can usually make that determination pretty quickly. If he isn't attracted to 'fat' women, and you were in fact fat, that would be quickly noted and no second or third date. You didn't suddenly become enormous when you took off your shirt, unless you're packing some uberspanx under there.

    Something else is probably going on there, and you probably don't want to stick around to find out what it is. There are decent men out there who will support you, appreciate all parts of you, find you physically attractive, and treat you appropriately - and they will also break things off appropriately without making verbal pro-and-con lists while you stand completely vulnerable in front of them. (That's some weird behavior right there. Seriously.)
  • carolerunsalot
    carolerunsalot Posts: 96 Member
    I agree with everyone who says you are better off with out this guy. This is not the type of person I would miss in my forever. Feel blessed that you get to move on sooner rather than later!
  • katie_rnc
    katie_rnc Posts: 30 Member
    What a jerk. He doesn't deserve to see you naked.
  • suzyjane1972
    suzyjane1972 Posts: 612 Member
    edited July 2016
    I just asked my hubby as a man what would make him criticise a woman about her body when shes naked and ready for fun.......he laughed and said the old line "how do you turn a man on......turn up" he said no man EVER says that....and then mentioned he could have been a bit limp and needed to take the attention about the fact his little soldier wouldn't stand to attention.
  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
    Just out of curiosity - how, exactly, did the breakup occur? When, exactly, did he come forth with the revelation that he didn't like your weight/physique?
  • caroldavison332
    caroldavison332 Posts: 864 Member
    Unfortunately attraction is mainly a visual thing. Otherwise we would all be in love with Mother Theresa and Gandhi. Admit it. You want to be with a Brad Pitt more than a Jack Black. HOW he informed you of this was grossly disrespectful. You are lucky that it ended when it did.

    Also, I don't understand all of the references to female body parts as insults. My breasts, vagina, etc are highly exceptional. Arent' yours?
  • SamanthaLouiseMence
    SamanthaLouiseMence Posts: 663 Member
    What a wanker!!!!!!

    I would've smacked him on principle!!! You don't speak to people like that!!!
    His mother should be very proud!!!!

    Complete *kitten*!
  • suzyjane1972
    suzyjane1972 Posts: 612 Member
    edited July 2016
    smence wrote: »
    What a wanker!!!!!!

    I would've smacked him on principle!!! You don't speak to people like that!!!
    His mother should be very proud!!!!

    Complete *kitten*!

    I love the fact the word wanker is allowed....but *kitten* isn't.
  • LaReineDesPixels
    LaReineDesPixels Posts: 105 Member
    People are going to go for what they want. The best thing to do is try to get as much info of what they are interested in as possible from the jump. More talking leads to less situations happening such has this. If they don't like what they see and it cannot go any further than what is being shown they can kick rocks, his loss! Plenty of options out there and you possess beyond the required features to carry on... NEXT!
  • ItsyBitsy246
    ItsyBitsy246 Posts: 307 Member
    edited July 2016
    LaceyBirds wrote: »
    How nice. You thought you were dating a person, and he thought he was dating a collection of body parts. He thought he was falling in love with "you" - really? So he fell in love with your boobs and butt, but the love did not extend to your gut? (Sorry, not making fun of your bod, it just rhymed nicely). :) What a guy!!! What a catch!!! I think the truly terrible part is telling you he was falling in love with you, but you were too fat for him - just plan old cruel, and I think, intentionally cruel. Please don't think if you lost weight he would then love all of you - he wouldn't. He would find something else to criticize, and then something else, and it would go on and on. Truly, you are lucky he left, but I feel sorry for the next poor woman he dates. I looked at your pictures, you are as cute as a bug, so give yourself a hug and be thankful that he wasn't your husband.

    THIS ^^. This says everything I wanted to type but more eloquently. Guy is a total dickitten.
  • MVega90
    MVega90 Posts: 9 Member
    Whoo! Sounds like you dodged a bullet! Not all men think that way, only the shallow a**hole ones do. On to the next one! Keep focused on your weight loss and *kitten* what anyone tells you!
  • Majcolorado
    Majcolorado Posts: 138 Member
    What the actual *kitten*. He's a full sized *kitten*-nozzle for sure.

    Not only do you have an opportunity to find a non-*kitten*-y guy, but also to hone your radar and avoid such *kitten*-hats in the future. Congrats on dodging that bullet!
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    suzyjane1972 wrote: »
    ...he could have been a bit limp and needed to take the attention about the fact his little soldier wouldn't stand to attention.

    This.
  • afatpersonwholikesfood
    afatpersonwholikesfood Posts: 577 Member
    onefortyone wrote: »
    My stomach looks like a beige Hefty bag half-filled with cooked oatmeal had gross sex with freddy kruger and my stomach is their love-child. And my husband still can't keep his hands off it.

    I kinda wanna meet this guy and smack him with some of my excess tummy skin.

    LMAO. +1. And my husband would have words with me if he ever heard me describe it that way.
  • Gallowmere1984
    Gallowmere1984 Posts: 6,626 Member
    jemhh wrote: »
    Gallowmere1984 wrote: »
    Can't lie: I've done this before. Some things just get unacceptably out of hand.

    How did you tell the person this though? I'm really curious. Like I said before, I think it is fine to not find a person's appearance attractive but from the OP's decription, the guy seemed to detail it out, which seems overly mean. I don't know if it is possible to relay that info without sounding mean though. I mean, is it better to say "it's not you, it's me" or to make up a reason or to disappear if this kind of thing happens? What is the protocol for this kind of thing?

    I also don't know how you don't have at least some idea of what a person looks like under his/her clothes before they get them off.

    Oh, I wasn't a total *kitten* about it. I played it off as being more intoxicated than I really was, and just not "in the mood" due to booze related function failure. Ended with more of a "yeeeeah, let's do something else". Ended up playing video games for the evening. Half the time I'd rather do that anyway, no matter how attractive a person is.

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