advice from men please

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Misscarpainter
Misscarpainter Posts: 10 Member
in Chit-Chat
how do i tell my b/f that i love him? should i even tell him at all, or should i wait for him to say it first?? and if i say it first, what if he doesnt say it back? do any of you guys have any advice please?
Normally im a rush into a relationship and think about it later kind of girl, and ive paid deeply for making those mistakes in the past..
but not this time, ive really taken my time, moved slowly and got to know this man, i love him, and i just want him to know that.. how do i tell him?
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Replies

  • benmullins4
    benmullins4 Posts: 678 Member
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    I'm with @GnothiSeauton23. Orally for sure...

  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
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    Way long time ago she stood on her tippy toes and kissed me. It wasn't my idea. I was neither experienced, suave, nor sophisticated at courting a lass. I'm still not. I was not then, and I am not now, unique in that respect. You may have to take some initiative. If he's not good with that, get away from him.
  • Thisnameischosen_
    Thisnameischosen_ Posts: 619 Member
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    Oral is the best way. Just tell him!
  • curlsintherack
    curlsintherack Posts: 465 Member
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    Men don't play the games over telling you that we love you.

    If you love him then tell him. He may already love you back and just simply hasn't thought about telling you yet.
  • Shells918
    Shells918 Posts: 1,070 Member
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    Worst thing was telling someone I loved them, and getting no response.
  • Shells918
    Shells918 Posts: 1,070 Member
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    Worst thing was telling someone I loved them, and getting no response.
  • druidkat7
    druidkat7 Posts: 691 Member
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    JeromeBarry1 wrote: »
    Way long time ago she stood on her tippy toes and kissed me. It wasn't my idea. I was neither experienced, suave, nor sophisticated at courting a lass. I'm still not. I was not then, and I am not now, unique in that respect. You may have to take some initiative. If he's not good with that, get away from him.

    Sounds like you're something of an introvert, then, Jerome. Nothing wrong with that at all, especially since most people (including the women) still think it's the guys who should take initiative always, and not all men are cut out to be what society thinks men should be. I think both genders should be free to say whatever's on their mind, regardless of who speaks their mind first. Why should it matter? If one person says "I love you first," and the other feels similarly, where's the problem? If a girl takes the initiative and is the one to kiss a guy first, and he's more than okay with it, and simply kisses her right back, where's the issue?

    To Misscarpainter: I'm a female, but as I recall hearing, men find confidence sexy. If you have the confidence to tell him what you feel, and are up front about it, he'll likely be the sort to appreciate it. My mom took the initiative with my dad, because she's like that, and unlike many men of his time, he found that intriguing.

    But I'm with Jerome on this one. Take the initiative.
  • druidkat7
    druidkat7 Posts: 691 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Ian_Davies wrote: »
    Personally i think you should tell him...
    - you've waited and not rushed in, which is great...
    - however if you are saying i love him but only if he says he loves me, or i love him but he needs to say it first...then to be honest that sounds like a condition or a game.
    - guys don't like this game playing either

    Just be you, say how you feel.

    And just to let you in on a little secret...guys are just as nervous about saying it too soon and scaring off the person they like...

    I like how you think, Ian. :wink: I'm okay with a guy saying it first, but the idea that the guy should always, only say it first, lest the girl be perceived as 'too masculine,' too 'take-charge,' has never sat well with me. Not solely because I'm a feminist, but because I think the words "I love you" should be an equal opportunity phrase, both ways. :wink:


  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    Thisnameischosen_ wrote: »
    Oral is the best way. Just tell him!

    The first part of this is solid advice.

    I don't understand how the second part is related though.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,492 Member
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    How many minutes have you two been dating?

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